Being that I know very little about Doctor Who, other than the words 
TARDIS and...well, that's about it, I felt like responding anyway. I'm 
enjoying this. But here go some comments/responses/C&C anyway...

Brian Welch wrote:

--- StudioPC <studiopc@sbcglobal.net> wrote:

  

Then, as though this was perfectly normal.  Janet took Hermione's  
hand and pulled her inside.

All was quiet and then Hermione leapt backwards out of the clock,  
staring in wide-eyed horror.

She sat there for several moments, chest heaving and then she got
up and carefully examined the clock. "This is impossible," she said
    

to herself and taking a deep breath, went back to the front of the
clock and stepped inside.
    

Hermione has seen this sort of thing before, in book 4. The wizard
tents at the Quidditch Cup did this sort of thing. Pup tent on the
outside, house-sized accomodations, fully stocked with furniture and
food on the inside. Even if this story occurs before book 4, Hermione
didn't express shock when she first saw the tents. She's had to have
read about such things before.

I enjoyed reading this, the only disjoint coming when Hermione was
surprised at the Tardis.

Brian Welch

I'm fully prepared to accept Hermione thinking this is impossible. She's 
been raised to think that her mother is a normal, run-of-the-mill 
muggle, with no connection to anything magic or extraordinary (except 
that perhaps she's very good at taking care of teeth). Additionally, 
she's just been killed and reborn (and again, since I have no DW 
knowledge, maybe this isn't as "critical" as it could be) so perhaps 
she's a little flaky and confused. As Hermione herself says: "Nothing 
fits right. Nothing seems right," she said. "I don't feel right."

Anyway, she recovers immediately after that and attempts to "piece" 
together the situation.



StudioPC wrote:

In time, the body would have been discovered, the police summoned,  
the body identified as one Hermione Granger, and the parents  
notified. They would have grieved, buried their daughter and tried to  
move on.

Would have, except, that something very peculiar happened; Hermione's  
body began to glow.
  

I think that should be a regular colon, or even a period + new line. Ergo:

Would have, except, that something very peculiar happened: Hermione's body began to glow.

It just looks...odd in any form, I suppose.

Janet turned. Hermione stood in the middle of the room. She wore a  
button down shirt with a black tie, dark blue pants and a vest that  
was a touch too snug and a light coat that came down to mid-thigh. A  
tie pin in the shape of a question mark adorned her coat lapel and  
she wore a fedora at a jaunty angle. Boots with a slight heel were on  
her feet.

  

I find this description delightful. I think I can find that outfit on 
the racks, though, when I go out in Harajuku on Saturdays. I'll take a 
picture!

"I'm sure mine still fit," Hermione protested. "I might be a bit  
bigger in the tits and arse, but . . . what?"

"You have a fouler mouth on you, Hermione," Janet said frowning. "Do  
try to control it."
  

Well, now she's really a pleasant match for Ron, isn't she? A little 
fouler, a little less reserved...


- 
.. Jerry Levine .................

.. www.jerrylevine.com [work] ...
.. www.patchmonkey.net [personal]

.. jerry.levine@rutgers.edu .....
.. jslevine@temple.edu ..........
.. jerry@jerrylevine.com ........       
.. jerrylevine@gmail.com ........       
.. patchmonkey@patchmonkey.net ..


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