Eimii wrote:
Disclaimer: All characters portrayed (thus far) are creations and property
of Kishimoto Masashi. I claim no legal right to use them, and I am making
no money off of this piece of fanfiction. Please don't sue me.
Standard C&C Disclaimer: All the below is my only occasionally useful
humble opinion, my only occasionally correct grammatical and spelling
corrections, and/or my only occasionally funny humor.
Spoiler Warning: This story begins during the intermission between the
second and third stages of the Chuunin Exam.
Righty-ho!
...Aaaaand i think that should cover it. When i first started posting this
fic on fanfiction.net (way back in 2003 O_o;), i included few other
disclaimers that are hopefully less important now.
For instance, i felt obliged to mention that this is not a Naruto x Sasuke
or Kakashi x Iruka yaoi/slashfic, because that's _all there was_ on
fanfiction.net at the time.
Ew. At least things are a little better now. Though in all honesty, I
could also do without the hordes of poorly written Random Male Character
x Random Female Character "romances" littering the section now.
I also pointed out that this is a
Sakura-centric fic; this one may still carry some weight, as there are
doubtless still tons of Sakura-haters out there. This may not be for you
folks- but hey, you never know...
I think we can rest assured that I am not among them. :)
Now that that's all out of the way, please sit back, relax, and enjoy the
show! C&C is always welcome, so please tell me if you like the fic, hate
the fic, or have any other burning notions that you feel the need to
express after reading this. I've been writing this for so long that the
way i write has changed a bit since these early chapters, so suggessions
on how i can improve them would be great. Reader response is the bread and
butter of fanfiction authors!
Well, I can always use an excuse to reread this story, so here goes
nothing...
P.S.: Though i'll be posting all 20 chapters of Suiren to the FFML in
preparation to post the _new_ chapter i'm working on (provided anyone here
actually reads these first few), the existing chapters are all still
available at www.fanfiction.net/~eimii... Just, so- you know... If anyone
here likes it, and wants to read more... (I can dream, can't i?)
*salivates at the thought of a new chapter*
"Welcome to Yamanaka Flowers!" Ino chirped cheerfully, though her
enthusiasm faltered as her eyes lit upon the person walking in the door.
"-oh, hello Sakura." Leaning over the counter and propping her chin in her
hand, Ino dropped the perpetually sunny mask she wore for the customers
and waved lazily to the pink-haired girl. "What'cha here for today," she
asked in a more relaxed tone.
Should be a question mark after today.
If only she'd really defeated Ino! Then she'd... what? Train by herself?
Would Kakashi-sensei have found someone to help her prepare for the third
exam? He complimented her often enough about how sharp she was, but he
never really took any interest in her otherwise. He was always watching
Sasuke and Naruto though, giving them appraising looks that he never cast
her way. They were strong, and they would only become stronger, while she
seemed doomed to mediocrity.
One of my favorite parts of the post-timeskip manga was Kakashi at least
sort of getting some come-uppance for his non-interest in Sakura. (It
really says something how surprised he was by her growth, considering
that _she_ wasn't the one he hadn't seen in almost three years.)
As Ino rounded the counter with a pair of shears, Sakura thought about the
slick-haired boy. She wondered how calm _she'd_ be, if she were in his
place. She'd probably be a nervous wreck. That Hidden Sand girl was
_dangerous,_ and it was no big secret that the Kagemane had a few
limitations.
Particularly when your opponent knows to expect it.
"I- yes- no. It's..." Sakura mumbled, paying for and accepting the flower
in a daze. Ino was giving her a funny look; she realized she was staring,
and hastily averted her gaze.
"It's nothing."
"If you say so, crazy forehead girl," the other girl quipped, not sounding
convinced.
Knowing what happens later thanks to Anko, I can't help chortling at
this bit. Poor Sakura-chan.
Slamming the bedroom door behind her, Sakura tossed her bulging shoulder
bag onto the bed and began clearing some space on her desk. After visiting
Lee, she'd gone straight to the academy and borrowed every scroll they
would give her on mind control, mental defenses and genjutsu.
Missing comma after defenses.
It wouldn't be the first time she'd come to him looking for study
material. Back in the academy she had memorized every text they'd assigned
her, and then often did extra research to impress the professors. She was
probably the only genin who'd passed the first exam without cheating once,
and she hadn't done any special preparation for it. Even if she'd never
won against Ino at anything else, Haruno Sakura never lost to anyone when
it came to studying.
It's too bad that Kishimoto didn't think to give her some more
opportunity to show that off usefully in canon. It wouldn't have been
hard to have her recognize some techniques from what she'd read (say
against the Rain team in the Forest of Death) and that kind of thing
could have gone a long way toward derailing the anti-Sakura bandwagon.
Ah well.
That was what she was counting on now. Talking with Lee about his
training- it was a subject they kept drifting back to, so anxious was he
to return to it -Sakura had realized that in some ways they were a lot
alike. Despite the fact that she could figure things out faster than most,
Sakura was no more a 'Sasuke' or a 'Neji' than he was. They were both
'hard working' types, as Lee put it, he with his body and she with her
brain.
>From Kakashi's comments, Sakura does have an extraordinary natural
talent for chakra control, though, so she's not entirely on the 'hard
work' side of things.
There's not much evidence that she's really aware of this to any real
extent, though, so her thoughts still work.
Once she became a genin, however, it'd felt like all the studying she'd
done had been pointless; the real world was vastly different the
classroom. When they'd been ambushed them on the way to the Wave Country,
Sasuke was the only one of them who had kept his head. She and Naruto had
been paralyzed with fear at the first sign of a real fight, and while
Naruto had recovered with a vengeance, she had only fallen further behind
with time, always hiding in her teammates' shadows just like she had been
sheltered by Ino's shadow before.
Hmm. It has been a while since I watched the scene, but I seem to
recall that Sakura didn't really freeze in it - she moved to protect
Tazuna, but was just completely outclassed by the attacker and wouldn't
have been able to block his attack if Sasuke hadn't intervened.
Orochimaru's attack had been a rude awakening for her. Caught in the open,
unprotected, it had taken harsh words and painful choices to make her
remember who she was. She wasn't Ino's sidekick, always trailing half a
step behind, not Sasuke and Naruto's delicate princess, basking in their
triumphs and weeping at their defeats. She was Haruno Sakura, and she was
a ninja of the Hidden Leaf. A sharp mind filled with knowledge beyond her
years was her weapon of choice, and it was about time that she started
using it.
Shouldn't it be the Sound trio's attack that was the rude awakening?
(In a way, I suppose that was also Orochimaru's attack, though.)
Despite the risks, Ino had shown her once that it was indeed possible to
use the Yamanaka family's 'espionage' jutsu in a fight, and Sakura was
willing to bet that her rival hadn't stopped refining her technique just
because neither of them had passed the exam. She was probably already
figuring out ways around the surprising resistance that Sakura had shown.
Sakura would face a stronger opponent when she fought Ino again, and this
time she was determined to be ready or it.
"ready for it"
Neither one would help her when she got to the gate, though. No matter how
you looked at it, she wasn't going to become genjutsu master overnight,
"become a genjutsu master"
Unsurprisingly, the chuunin at the gate did demand that she drop her
illusion and take off the mask, but a wry grin crossed his lips as he
checked over her ID. "Not bad at all," he noted, sounding genuinely
impressed. "Don't see a lot of kids your age with the patience to learn
genjutsu."
"Really?" Sakura wondered, blushing at the compliment.
"Yeah; guess it's not as 'cool' as ninjutsu or taijutsu," the guard mused
with a chuckle.
After all the build-up, it had _better_ be cool when Kishimoto finally
lets Sakura learn some genjutsu....
*DAMN!* "Uuuh... Wave Country Sea Weasel Rabies," Sakura replied lamely.
Would be a good name for a band. </Dave Barry>
That did it. With a roar of understanding, Lee clenched his good fist in
front of him. "Ooh! Thank you Sakura-san! I should have known that if
there were anyone in the world as inspiring as Gai-sensei, it would be
you!" Turning to focus his manly, tear-filled gaze upon her alone, he
cracked what was definitely the beginnings of a patented 'Gai megawatt
smile.'
Hee.
"Bye Lee!" the two girls called sheepishly, waving.
Should be a comma after bye.
"Oh? Really sensei, that's-" Sakura's hands paused right before her
fingers touched it. *Oh gods, no! Nonono, don't let it be that!* Eyes
widening in horror, the pink-hired kunoichi stared at the small square of
cloth like it was something unspeakable, obscene, diseased and probably
poisonous.
Ah, yes. :)
To be continued...
Comments on the next chapter to follow...