Nugar wrote:

$Ah, about time I got to send this.  I've moved, I've no easy internet 
access, sometimes life is just troublesome.  

% Yeah, I was a latecomer to the internet. Now I can't live without it. 
I was latecomer to DSL, now I can't figure out how I lived without it.

This is my last post from 
nugar@tds.net.   All future replies should be made to 
nugarthebarbarian@yahoo.com until I get internet access again.
 

% Got it. Made the change.

Avenging
Act II
Chapter 4
Backstabbers



   

$No pre-title blurb?  Aww.
 

% Nothing came to me for this one. Besides, I really liked the size of 
this chapter. I wanted all of them to be like this, not 100K+ monsters.

Waves lapped against the sides of ships moored at the docks as they had 
since the dawn of man.

   

$I don't think we had ships at the dawn of man. 
 

% It's figurative. Sort of an imagery thing.

The men were busy as they urged a group of women toward the only wooden 
sailing vessel tied to the docks, its sails unfurled as though it would 
leave at any moment. The women�s hands were bound together and gags were 
forced in their mouths, preventing any noise from leaking out. Each was 
forced to wear a set of longer iron chains clamped to their ankles, 
allowing enough room to walk carefully but no more.

   

$carefully, but
 

% Used most of your grammar corrections.

Their gait held the 
weight of despair that weighed them down more effectively than chains 
ever could.



   

$Ah, I see.  Their parents signed them up for a diet camp with Callista 
Flockhart.
 

% Heh. But she's passe now. Lindsey Lohan I think has gone skeltal.

The group of sailors was dominated by a huge man who watched them 
carefully from the side. He stood over six foot high and weighed at 
least two-hundred and fifty pounds.

   

$'Snot _that_ big.
 

% True. Should up it some. Actually, I probably have his peg leg stats 
from some Marvel Handbook somewhere.

One of the sailors said, �Actually, Commander Kraken, calling us scurvy 
dogs is inappropriate since, thanks to the miracles of nutrition, we now 
eat a balanced diet with plenty of vitamin C to stave off the effects of 
scurvy.�



   

$Ah, how progressive of them, despite the anacronisim.
 

% All but Kraken, anyway.

Commander Kraken turned to the man. The speaker couldn�t help noticing 
his comrades suddenly backing away from him.



   

$Kraken: That's it.  For contradicting me, your ration of vitamin C and 
sunny D has been cut.  Ye'll be toothless and delirious before we tie a 
rope around you and keelhaul you to Los Angeles!
 

% Heh. Not quite. I must have had pirate on the brain lately, since I 
did an offlist lemon with some using pretty much the same cheesy 
dialogue. Well, actually very cheesy dialogue, which was part of the 
fun. Not to take the stuff seriously. It works much better.

�There�s something you should probably know about me before you can 
continue with yer employment here.�

�Sir?�



   

$Kraken: I sleep with all the new crewmembers.  It's a lonely life, that 
of a pirate.
 

% Heh

In a flash the cutlass was pulled free of Kraken�s belt and swung, 
neatly decapitating the man�s head from his shoulders. �I hate 
comedians!�

   

$No sense of humor.  I thought pirates were supposed to be jolly grog 
swilling pigs?
 

% Kraken isn't jolly. Homicidal, maybe.

The men had started to move with renewed zeal when a voice from perched 
above a large stack of crates said, �Well, well well, either this is a 
really off Broadway production of �The Pirates of Penzance� or I�ve 
stumbled on Commander Kraken and his amazingly outdated crew.�



   

$Random pirate: Outdated?!  Outdated!?  I'll have you know I've got root 
on five warez servers, an AMD 3600+ with two 500 gig SATA RAID drives 
and a satellite broadband connection on board running torrents, and we 
just loaded up fifteen crates of freshly stamped bootleg CDs bound for 
Korea!  So nyah!
 

% Heh

Kraken shouted, �See here, now! I ain�t no super-villain. I just be a 
humble pirate.�



   

$Arr.
 

% Yep.

The masked adventurer reached out with his senses. Despite the five 
meters of distance between he and his foe, Kraken�s heartbeat was 
excited, as though he was about to launch an attack regardless of the 
distance. An errant memory crossed Daredevil�s mind, one of a time in 
China when Swordsman held exactly the same pose.



   

$Handy to remember.
 

% Supervillain rarely use normal swords. It's not supervilliany.

Daredevil narrowly ducked out of the way as a bolt of electricity 
flashed from the tip of the cutlass, arcing past where the hero had been 
a second before.

�Trying to shoot someone with a sword that shoots electricity proves 
you�re a super-villain!� Daredevil shouted.

�No, it proves I�m sneaky and underhanded, just like a proper pirate 
should be.�



   

$Kidd would have loved him one of those.
 

% Arr.

�I can anchor me peg leg to just about anything, sort of turning a 
debilitating injury into an advantage, don�t you know,� Commander Kraken 
offered in explanation as he took a couple of steps forward, intent on 
disemboweling his foe.



   

$Heh, if disney hears about that, their next pirate franchise will 
feature a peg legged pirate with a swiss army leg.  It's the kind of 
cute that will appeal to a wide audience.
 

% Heh.

The pirate underestimated Daredevil�s recuperative powers as the blind 
man raised his arms up. From his sleeves spat out a huge white cloud, 
hitting Kraken in the face and driving him back.

�Gar, not the old fire extinguisher to the face trick!� The pirate tried 
looking through the white mist surrounding him, but could see nothing.


   

$That old shtick?  I didn't think anyone fell for that one anymore.
 

% Not if they can help it.

�Captain Barracuda�s the name.� The man�s hand moved to his face, making 
Daredevil tense up. However he only scratched at his eye, the sound of 
something leathery making contact with the finger. So he was wearing an 
eye patch. All he needed was a parrot on his shoulder and his own pirate 
image would be complete.



   

$With this crew, the parrot would probably have a steel beak, a digital 
voice recorder, and swoop to the attack.
 

% Heh.Somewhere out there there is a villainous pirate like that. 
Probably in DC. Aquaman dealt with that type of foe all the time.

Daredevil�s radar sense tipped him off to Kraken�s heartbeat and 
that.� Captain Barracuda scratched his eye again. Only this time he 
raised the patch up and a beam of energy shot forth from the socket, 
striking Daredevil solidly and knocking him to the ground. This time he 
did not rise to his feet.



   

$If looks could only cut.

 

% Heh

�Correct.� Barracuda�s hand started to lift the patch when an arrow hit 
it, the tip exploding and dousing half of his face in it.



   

$In it what?  Glue, I assume, but you didn't say.
 

% Sticky substance now.

Barracuda appeared as though he were about to run for it when he saw a 
tiny figure fly into his view. A beam of energy came from it, hitting 
him in the face and rendering him unconscious.



   

$Kasumi is kinda vicious these days, isn't she?
 

% She likes fighting supervillains. A lot. And Kodachi even pays her a 
salary as an Avenger.

�I�ll talk, laddie. No need to be torturin� me further,� Kraken said. 
�Though you do do it well. Maybe you got a touch of pirate in ye after 
all.�



   

$Daredevil: I downloaded a crappy Evanescence song that struck a chord 
with me last week, I'm touched you noticed.  Now talk.
 

% Heh. I keep Immortal on my hardrive and loop it when I write sometimes.

�Are you certain?�

�Aye, laddie. I personally inspect all my merchandise, if you know what 
I mean.� He winked at Daredevil.



   

$Hey, can't be too careful.  If someone was to sell Konatsu or Tsubasa 
to me as a slave, I'd be kinda pissed.
 

% Kraken: Exactly.

It was a beach ball shaped yellow thing with simple features that passed 
for a face, almost as though they were drawn on by a child with a magic 
marker. It came in flying on wings that flowed out of the substance of 
the ball, able to appear and disappear without sign of an actual 
aperture, much like the being�s hands. It floated onto a padded cushion 
placed on the table in front of where the Hard Master had formerly sat, 
said its name was Onsokumaru,

   

$Oh, god.  That's so out of the blue it's almost purple, if that makes 
any sense.  Heh, I'm looking forward to his ninja girls and what the 
Hand would make of them.
 

% He has one. Remember, Onso had mostly only male ninjas.

Also of note were Onsokumaru�s two bodyguards that stood at his side 
during any public appearances. The first was a sixteen-year old girl 
dressed in a pink and black kunoichi outfit. It was extremely small, 
hugging her chest tightly and showing a huge bust hidden underneath, and 
the lower edge barely made it past her bottom.

   

$I loved the rampant fanservice they had.
 

% And they were equal about it. Look at how often the male ninja got 
spanked in their little loin cloths.

It was a good 
psychological edge against any male that allowed his hormones to 
distract them.

   

$True, I'd have been distracted, but just wait until she runs into a 
necrophiliac.  Suddenly, that cuteness is a liablity.  You know, that'd 
be kinda cute in a fic, in a nasty morbid pervert kinda way.
 

% Funny you should say that.

Matsuo could feel the assassin take aim when Shinobu suddenly sneezed. 
He swore he sensed something small cut through the air at the edge of 
his perception.

�Bless you,� Onsokumaru said.

Shinobu rubbed her nose. �Sorry, I think I sneezed one of my throat 
spikes out. Was anyone hit?�



   

$Heheh.  Figures.
 

% Yeah. I also improved the end of the line to 'Did anyone see where it 
went?"

A body fell through the tile and landed on the middle of the table.

�Oh, there it is.� Shinobu removed the poisoned throat dart from body 
   

% This makes it even better follow up now.

   

There was the answer to that question, Matsuo noted silently to himself. 
Shinobu was so dangerous that even one of his abilities hadn�t sensed 
the attack coming. She was probably more dangerous than Sasuke, and 
Onsokumaru more powerful than either of them if they had sworn fealty to 
him.

Onsokumaru said, �Now that the obligatory assassination attempt is over, 


   

$It really is obligatory.
 

% LIke he said.

let�s get down to business. How many new attractive babes have joined 
the Hand?�



   

$I liked the way his mind worked.
 

% Twisted comedy in the hands of a band of ruthless assasins.

�Damn bias against ninjas,� Onsokumaru mumbled. �Hopefully our Ninja 
World Amusement Park will change all the public perception about us.�



   

$Heheh.  I forsee problems at ninja world.  Something about a nine 
foot...  blue...  arachnid?  Nah, I must be mistaken.  That could never 
happen.
 

% I forgot about that. Yeah, that was a cute Tick storyline.

Matsuo jerked in his seat. Actually, that would work. The whole Ninja 
World thing was stupid, of course, but it was an economical way of doing 
it, as well as eliminating a rival assassin. Maybe they could even make 
the Ninja World�s financially viable. Perhaps it was something to 
seriously consider.



   

$There's a large fat man waiting in the wings in a hawaiian shirt.  He'd 
be the perfect manager.
 

% Heh.

Onsokumaru moved things along. �How about our success and mortality rates?�

Another lieutenant stood up, �One hundred and two successful 
assassinations, fifty-eight.� He looked at the empty uniform on the 
table. �Fifty-nine deaths among our membership.�

�Why so many fatalities this month?� Onsokumaru asked.



   

$Does seem kinda excessive.
 

% It's supposed to be.

That display disturbed even Matsuo, who had once eviscerated a 
half-dozen children to test himself and ensure he had developed no

   

$hadn't developed any

 

ridiculous feelings of sentimentality. He hadn�t.

   

$What he wouldn't admit, even to himself, was that he'd deliberately 
picked his targets out of the crowd at a Barney fan club autograph 
signing event.
 

% Barney seems to be mostly dead, though like bellbottoms he might 
someday make a comeback.

Shinobu raised her hand and gleefully shouted, �I can kill her, 
Onsokumaru-sama!�



   

$Maybe. 
 

% She'd try, anyway. We'd have Donny Cheng write it. I was disappointed 
he never did the nude Amazon mud wrestling challenge in Lesbian 1/2. 
*Sniffle*

Onsokumaru considered that. �I wonder if we could lure her into a nude 
oil wrestling death trap.�
�Hey, guys, we�re back, and we brought this!� the blond Youji, declared, 
throwing a skeleton of a man on top the table. It made a clunking noise, 
the weight of the skeleton chipping some of the table surface. �We 
couldn�t remove the head. Did you know his entire skeleton is made of 
adamantium? Stuff�s fused together, too.�



   

$Cute.
 

% I had no plans for canon Logan.

Omi turned on him in anger. �You slept with her? She was my cousin!�

�She was dead.�

�So you think defiling her corpse makes me feel better?�



   

$Youji: It did me.
 

% heh

�You�re the one that killed her.�

�It was fated that she die, like all of my family! It�s a tragedy that I 
have to bear.� Omi radiated a healthy doze of angst.

Aya finally entered the conversation, talking to Youji. �Maybe you 
should try sleeping with, you know, a girl that�s alive.�

Youji scoffed. �Nah, I tried it. They start whining and bitching about 
size, tempo, and want to be held afterwards, like it�s all about them. 
When I sleep with a girl, it�s all about me and my pleasure, not them. 
Doing it when they�re dead makes it easier for both of us.



   

$Heh, speaking of necrophiliacs.  I had no idea there was actually going 
to be one in this story. 

% Scary how our minds think alike.

He and Shinobu should fight.  And that's one 
of the reasons I enjoy C&Cing your fics so much.  Usually, anything off 
the wall I think of, you already have.
 

% Th Tiger does much the same with my lemons. Depending on your opinoin 
of lemons, this can be a bad or good thing.

Ken spat at the skeleton lying on the table. �And this asshole called me 
a queer. Fucking gaijin mutie.�

�You sleep with guys,� Aya pointed out.

�That doesn�t make me gay!� Ken shouted.

�It doesn�t?� Aya asked.


   

$Ken: No, my sucking dick is what makes me gay.
 

% Not quite.

�No! It just means I like sleeping with guys! I don�t even like fags.�
   

% Not liking the Weiss Krouse yaoibait boys, I will admit it was fun 
making them insane and having dialogue like that.

�Not really,� Onsokumaru said. �We assumed you�d die like the two 
hundred and thirty-five other members of the Hand he�s killed before 
you. We only sent you on that mission in the hopes that you�d meet the 
same fate as the others. You are insane, after all.�



   

$Pot calling the kettle black.  Though, at least he's honest.
 

% True. And Onso has a good kind of insantiy. Or at least a harmless one.

�It was easy,� Ken said. �He was highly overrated.�

Aya said, �He had just fought and killed two men, one called Creed and 
the other called Cyber. He was so weakened from the fight that not even 
his healing factor could overcome our attacks.�



   

$Heh.  Because, of course, Logan wouldn't go down easily.
 

% No. I think fighting two of his more vicious foes back to back and 
killing them made up for it.

�I said we were hoping you would die, not that actually dying is part of 
the mission. If you don�t want to die, then don�t.�



   

$Man, er, head, has a point.
 

% Yeah, that line seemed to go over well.

�I�ll get you the name of a third cousin of yours,� Onsokumaru offered.

�Done.�

Ken continued staring at the dart embedded in the wall.



   

$He didn't see it coming, did he?
 

% Nope.

�It�s settled, then. You go kill Elektra and have some fun,� Onsokumaru 
said.

The four turned and left. Matsuo couldn�t decide if it had been deft 
maneuvering on Onsokumaru�s part or just plain luck. What he did know 
was that in any case, he�d bide his time and wait a bit longer for an 
opening to take control of the Hand.



   

$Probably best.  He's most likely to die in some embarassing situation 
of his own devising, anyway.
 

% Heh

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Atsushi Morikawa sat at the bar, working on his third vodka martini, 
looking at his watch every five minutes. Soon that hottie, Hikari Kine 
would show up, and they could have a few drinks before heading back to 
his place for some hot sex. And he wouldn�t have to pay her afterwards, 
like he did most of the other girls he slept with. Life was finally 
taking an upswing for the information broker.



   

$J random oneshot character?  Nah.  I doubt it.
 

% Yep. At least that's the plan.

Atsushi had gone halfway through his drink when he felt a pair of arms 
wrap themselves around his neck and a set of impressive breasts mash 
themselves against his back. A light caress of breath touched his ear, 
turning him on. His date was even friskier than he could have hoped.

Then Atsushi felt the small blade press against his jugular.



   

$Not a good sign at the start of a date, but an optimistic man isn't 
always wrong.
 

% True

Atsushi detested how casual she sounded when saying things like that. 
�There hasn�t been any word out of them in the last five days. I mean 
nothing. It�s weird, like they�ve given up on you or something. I�m 
being honest. I�m not holding out on you.� But she wasn�t going to 
believe him. She�d cut his throat and be out of the bar before anyone 
saw the blood pooling around him because she was that good. He went 
ahead and wet himself just to get it over with.



   

$Well, if it's obligatory, you might as well.
 

% Less smelly than loosening the bowels.

And then a pair of arms wrapped themselves around his waist and a set of 
impressive breasts mashed themselves against his jacket. �How�s it 
going, Atsushi?�



   

$And he wets himself again.  Nice parallel, though.
 

% Thanks.

Hikari had finally shown up. He laughed softly.

Her hand went down to his groin, grasping it.

   

$Hey, she is pretty frisky.

 

Then the grasping stopped 
and the breasts weren�t pressed against him so tightly. Atsushi�s eyes 
nearly rolled into the back of his head. It was over.

�Ohh, you are well informed. How did you know I have a fetish for 
urine?� She grasped his groin even tighter.

Atsushi laughed. It appeared it was going to be a good night after all.



   

$Ehhhhh....  I suppose.  Whatever floats your boat, I guess.  
Personally, I prefer a girl I'm willing to kiss after sex.
 

% Ha! True. Hadn't consider that. Not into that sort of thing.

skyscraper that stood in a low scale area of Tokyo. Plans had called for 
it to be the centerpiece of a new financial district that would restore 
the area, but funding for the building fell through when it was revealed 
they were being backed by an outfit called the Secret Empire, and that 
the building was intended to be a forward attack base capable of 
leveling Tokyo.

   

$Plus, everyone knew that the Secret Empire had incredibly lousy credit, 
and all the loans were foreclosed.
 

% Heh. They were another SHIELD foe, like Hydra and AIM, so their 
existance in the universe is largely unchanged.

unconscious in his guardhouse. That meant Elektra had already arrived. 
He used his billy club to snare a girder and hoisted himself up to the 
fourth floor, one with much of the flooring complete. He walked through 
the building, his radar sense telling him all he needed to know about 
the structure in a way mere eyes never could. Except for what color it 
was, of course.



   

$Color is overrated.
 

% I like it.

�Because you can avoid their attacks and you need me alive to give you 
the information you crave.� She moved away from him more quietly than a 
mouse.

   

$Having had more than a few mice, and lived in houses with mice, I'd 
just like to note that they're actually pretty noisy.  But I get your point.
 

% True.

At the same moment the wire snapped, a pool cue arced through the air 
like a missile toward Aya�s back. Gracefully he pivoted on one foot, 
slashing through the cue and slashing it aside. He felt a coolness pass 
over him as he felt the blade contact the wood and the improvised weapon 
went flying to the side. Or more correctly, half of it, as he saw, to 
his horror, that someone had unscrewed the cue, making it two missiles. 
Having thrown them so closely together and perfectly in line, Aya had 
mistaken it for only one.



   

$Kinda reminds me of how Electra's dad died in the daredevil movie, 
though not exactly.
 

% I actually liked that movie. Would have liked it better if they had 
someone other than Afflack in the lead.

took over as the weight also caused the floor to collapse, taking the 
debris with a few more tons with it. Daredevil heard the echo through 
the building as the pile fell through two more floors before coming to a 
stop.



   

$He'll be alright.
 

% Nope. As dead as a doornail. And now, the WK boys are not coming back 
either. Unlike the comics, some of the people I kill stay dead.

�Of course it is. Let me guess. You feel guilt over her capture after 
arriving in Japan when you were seven.�

Daredevil stared at her in disbelief. Stick was the only person whom he 
had told. �You know about that?�

Elektra smirked. �There is nothing I didn�t know about her. We might as 
well have been one with how close we were.

   

$Daredevil: Oh, I see.  You are Shampoo.  Heh heh, you had me going for 
a while there.  So...  How have you been?
Shampoo:  ....    ....   ....shit, I made it too obvious.
 

% Heh. She's trying not to lie.

With his hyper-senses, Daredevil could sense a person�s heartbeat far 
more accurately than a lie detector. There was no tension whatsoever in 
Elektra as she spoke. Actually, she had become noticeably irritated at 
his contention that she was lying. And she made sense. She had no reason 
to lie. Not about this. Not to him. And he had a feeling that under 
these conditions, she�d keep her word.



   

$That, or she's a pathological liar, like the last guy he believed.
 

% She's showing a bit too much emotional shift for it.

Elektra nodded. The crone was good, and the assassin had the terrible 
feeling that under these conditions, she was outclassed even more badly 
than she had been against th4e Snakeroot. �Yes. Shampoo knew of a method 


   

$Errant 4.  Heh, sounds like some sort of sentai troupe.

Well, this was fun.  Kinda sad, and I'm willing to be that Shamps will 
show up again in the fairly near future. 

% With that kind of implication at the end, almost certianly. But not 
for a few more chapter.

You're going for a mostly 
Ranma cast, and she's a fairly major member of that cast.  Plus, I know 
you like her character. 

% No! What gave it away? *DB leafs through Shampoo 1/2 and Path of the 
Warrior while he waits for an answer*

It shows.  You give her good screen time.  Very 
clean, the few errors I saw I'm sure have already been pointed out by 
others, but here's my thoughts, and snarky half-wittisisms, anyway.

And remember, all replies go to nugarthebarbarian@yahoo.com  , since I'm 
unsubbing from the FFML with this account. 
 

% Thanks a lot, as always. Hope you get your internet problems squared away.

DB Sommer

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