$It's hard work sucking at the government teat.  Bout time I'm able to 
sit down and enjoy some comments.

Let's see if the new address will send this:

$Which it seemed to do fine.

     Osaka walks up wearing her school uniform and a coolie hat
with a pair of kitty ears sticking out the top.  "Azumanga
fanfics!" she cries.

Upon further reading, I'm glad you didn't do the rest of this in 
present tense.

$Yeah, no kidding.  Oddly, though, when I do outlines, they're always in 
present tense.  I guess it feels more immediate to me then.

     "This is a series of similarly themed vignettes with little
in the way of continuing plot and no unified title," Chiyo-chan
adds.

Fun, then. I like the feel of those (as you might have guessed)

$Thanks.  Heh, actually, they do have a unified title now.  Hit or 
Miss.  Some of the jokes worked, and some, well, didn't.

     "Yukari as she walks by waving her hammer and sickle,
dressed in thick felt boots, a heavy overcoat, and a fur hat,"
says 'In communist Russia, titles say you.'

Hmm. That one went over my head, though the look is Yukari.

$Just my take on the old 'In communist Russia, everything is reversed 
jokes.  It's gone, now, don't worry.

     "Oh, my God!  Look at that dress!" Yukari said loudly,

If it's that loud it's not 'said', maybe screeched. She does that when 
she's excited

$I started to go with screeched, but I didn't want to start off the 
first of the first with yukari being that shrill.  Guess I should have.

drawing Minamo's attention.

     She turned to see a full mannequin in a short black dress
directly beneath a store spotlight, which gave in an almost
heaven-sent look.

That feels off. Recommend separating into two. "dress. It stood 
directly..."

$Kay.

The loose, swirly skirt was long enough to be

decent, but had a slit up one side that would probably give
tantalizing glimpses of thigh as it moved.  The top of the skirt
split vertically at the waist into long thick folded trailers of
cloth which criss-crossed several times, overlapping completely
at the waist and lower back, but spacing farther and farther
apart as it continued up.  A narrow, diamond shaped gap was left
in the front to frame the belly button, and the final cross was
just below the breasts.  Each breast was covered, but a wide vee
of exposed flesh was left between them as the cloth climbed each
side of the neck and fastened in the back.

Nice description.

$Thanks.  At least I got something right.  :p

     Minamo knew without a doubt that

'without a doubt' is a bit cliche. I'd recommend dropping it or using 
something less common

$Right.  Dropped, in keeping with a hopefully more minamalist feel than 
my usual.

     Her jaw dropped as she saw Yukari undressing the mannequin
and keeping an irate store clerk away with one foot.

Heh. I kind of thought that was what would happen

$Excellent.

     What price beauty?

Nice lead in to the next connected scene

$The titles were easy at first, so I went with them, later own it got to 
be harder to do a title than the vignette.

you were to buy it and let me borrow it?"  She gave her very
bestest friend

While ordinarily I would disapprove of the improper grammar, since 
this is using Yuakri's POV, it works fine.

$I will admit I tend to use bad grammar deliberately too often.

     The three contemplated that for a moment.

     "Oh, well, I'm failing English anyway," Osaka said sadly,
and walked away.

Eh. That fell a bit flat for me.

$Yeah.  -_-  Working on it.

     Yomi yawned.  "Oh, oh, yeah.  I did it on my new computer
last night."

     Tomo gasped as everyone turned to stare in envy at Yomi.
"A new...  computer?"

     Everyone oohed, except Osaka, who had begun the delicate
task of the alternate solution to the Rubik's puzzle, which was
to take all the stickers off and paste them back on.

Yeah. My brother did that once. It's called 'Thinking outside the 
box.' :)

$Heh, that'd have made a really good title for this one.  I may steal it.

     And your little homework, too.

probably ought to be capped

$All the titles in the manga were in all caps.  I guess I could do it 
like that.  Or, I could just cap the first letter of each word.

     Yomi put a hand up to her face and straightened her glasses
as everyone, except Osaka, who was putting on the last sticker,
gaped.

     Tomo returned and plucked the folder of homework off of

can drop 'of' just using off works fine.

$Kay.

Yomi's head.  "I'll just be taking that."

     "All finished!" Osaka exclaimed, dropping the cube into
Chiyo's startled hands.


     Intel inside.

     "Hey, guess who's

whose, I believe

$Yeah, you're right.  Another in a long list of simple, simple mistakes 
I should have caught, and would have in another month or two.

     "Wouldn't it make sense, though?" Osaka reasoned.  "Think
about how it sounds.  Stencil.  Sten-cil.  Kinda like Hansel.
Ooh!" she exclaimed.  "Wouldn't that make a cute fairytale?
Hansel and Stencil, the story of a young boy and a stencil, lost
while painting signs to a witch's bakery in the woods!"

...No. I don't think it would make a good story, since you're asking.

$Aww, you're just not giving it a chance.

     Tomo did a little happy dance.  "It means she's not a l33t
h4xx0r like me, and I wasted her like the n00b she is last night
in Cstrike!" she exclaimed, shortly before Yomi decked her.

God, I hate netspeak.

$Yomi does too.

the idea of lifting the top and using the broad, strong glass as
a platform to allow her access to the folders.

This is going to be bad, isn't it?

$Actually, it seemed to fizzle at the end.

Folders in hand, Yukari smoothed her skirt down and strode out
the door happily, never noticing the copy machine start spitting
out copy after copy into its tray.

Yep, thought as much. The fun of copy machines.

$I've had several requests for scans of Yukari.

     Touga blushed bright red, but grinned widely.  He didn't
know teachers would do things like this.  It was his duty, nay,
his trust as an office assistant to make sure that others saw
this.

DIdn't picture her with those kind of panties. Heh

$My wife thought up all these except for the original one, which I stole 
from a japanese pocky commercial.  I'd never have thought of panties 
like that, either, my tastes run towards things a little slimmer.

     Shock and awe.

     "I can't believe those boys," Yomi murmured, blushing.

     "Heh, Tuesday," Osaka said, grinning.

Ha. Osaka's reaction is the best.

$Yeah, gotta love Osaka.  She gets things many of the other girls don't 
even if she misses so much.

     "I can't believe those boys were passing these out!" Yomi
says,

said

$Whoops.  I swear this is the last time I release something without 
waiting a month or two and reediting it myself.  I just gloss over this 
stuff right after I've written it, like it's not there.

     They all nodded and threw them into the garbage can, then
walked away.
A few minutes later, when they were out of sight, Kaorin scuttled
back and fished hers out, tucking it carefully in her folder
before hurrying to keep up with the others.

Heh

$She knows it's not Sakaki, but a Found Art person such as herself can't 
resist.

     "Umm, the stationary, ma'am."

     "Ah."  Minamo digested this in silence for a moment, then,
improbably, her eyebrow rose higher.  "You were looking at the
stationary?"

Minamo: You little freak

$Heh.

     Still life pencil drawings of running shoes.  Pics of
Sakaki running.  Pics of Sakaki sitting at her school desk,
staring out the window.  A haunting watercolor of an empty school
desk in front of a window, the sun streaming in from the outside.
Pics of Sakaki in different clothes.  Pics of Sakaki, for lack of
a better word, looking cool.  One rather out of place picture of
an ice cube, which Kaorin had had a mind to delete for a while,
but had yet to do it.

Heh.

$Though boring, and about to be compressed like crazy, I think I've got 
some fun things to do with that collage later.

     A few more clicks later, Tomo went back to Google to
redefine her search parameters.

Hehehe.

$Tomo as a Lupin fangirl.  It's canon!  Really!

Amusing set of vignettes. I enjoyed them greatly

$Thanks, glad you did.  Thanks for the comments!  And, heh, you should 
write some more yourself and show me how it's done.

-Nugar




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