--- DB Sommer <sommer@3rdm.net> wrote:

And moving on to a little something original:

I aim to please.  Or to hit people hard in what some
call the pleasure organ.  I sometimes forget.  ^_^;

From The Journal Of Marcus Reaver

Actually reminds me of a title HP Lovecraft would
have done. Though this
isn't that kind of fic.

I was thinking about late 19th century stories when
trying to come up with a name for this.  I recall
some of those stories were presented as written
diaries.

     Hello.  I am Lieutenant Marcus Reaver of the

Upper City Police

Department.  I'm making this blog because the

shrink thought it would

help me calm down, and as testimony in case I need

to plead insanity.

Well, an interesting opening couple of sentences

The opener can be critical to a fic.  One can lose a
lot of readers, or at least prejudice them against the
rest of the fic, with a boring first paragraph.

The guys from Mega Co. also want their "research

data", so much that

they were ready to order me to write this blog

once the shrink

suggested it, but let it be known I'd resign if

that was my only

reason.  Mega only acts like it owns everything.

Sounds like a bit of humor in here.

Eh?  <rereads>  Where?

     So, why am I writing this?  Because I'm the

only mecha pilot UCPD

has left,

Ah, an offshoot of the AD Police, I see. :)

And how many other mecha police anime?  ;P

also cute, which puts some citizens' minds at

ease.  And it's easier

to pilot through the city.  Many citizens use

human-sized exoskeletons

for transportation, but our mecha are 2 to 3

stories tall.  SD Mode is

only 1.5 stories.

Interesting.

As I said, the inspiration for this fic was thinking
about what if you had a "real" SD mecha, with all the
usual SD effects...especially invulnerability (when's
the last time you saw decapitation in an all-SD show)
and less control over emotions.

     No one lives in Mid City any longer.  It's

just a bunch of

support towers, that

not sure if you need that comma

Putting myself in Marcus's shoes...yes, it was needed.
I can't quite put it into words, but my concept of
Marcus states quite clearly that the comma was
correct, to him.

(Yes, the characters do speak to me.  No, I'm not
ready for the asylum yet.)

*Posted Monday, May 1st, 8:55 PM, by user

reddfox1337*

Where do you think your mecha were built?  Upper

City won't get its

hands dirty with large manufacturing projects like

that.  They ship

'em all down here.  Me, a couple friends, and a

couple guys from Mega

did the test piloting for all the mecha the police

were going to test.

Maybe I was even in your cockpit.

Ooo. Sounds kinky. :)

*Posted Monday, May 1st, 9:09 PM, by user

fluffykins6969*

   I'll bet you want him in your cock pit.

See. fluffykiuns thinks exactly like me. :)

Hey, if you want to write a semi-SI sequel and make
her your daughter, go for it.  Just make sure to keep
continuity with her parents' fate.  ;P

     My boss says Mega says robot dummies with

simulated nervous

systems did the test piloting.  They admit some of

the manufacturing

was done locally, but insist most of it was done

overseas, although

they didn't seem to be able to agree exactly

where.

This is what happens when your cover story isn't all
that good.

I've heard more transparent ones from certain large
corporations IRL.

Mega Corporation.  Man, do they ever earn their

name.  I can believe

they think us test pilots were robot dummies,

'cause that's how they

treat most of their workers.  To be honest, some

of 'em I couldn't

tell from a robot.  Some of them actually are

robots - standard health

plan is to make a recording of your brain in case

you die while

employed - but that's different.  Robots who

aren't people don't earn

paychecks, but like that matters to middle

management.  I heard

they're working on 'bots with flesh so their execs

won't even have to

apologize when they mistake us for the mindless.

Heh. Of course, I do know a lot of mindless
people...

_>

<_<

Just don't say the I-word.  Or at least not in
conjunction with you-know-what.  THEY don't like
having their conspiracy hinted at.

Or not.  ^_-

If you need

an airhole or your

own path to Mid City, just dig, so long as it's

not too near a support

tower.

Yeah, that would be a problem.

"Don't Drink And Dig" just doesn't have the same
ring, you know?

 There are concerns about the resulting structural
stability,

especially since Upper City rests on Mid City

which rests on Lower

City, but you need a license to dig, and the

license exam enforces

some minimal competence.

What, like the Bar Exam is supposed to winnow out
stupid people from
becoming lawyers.

Supposed to, yes.  I hear it even works pretty well on
certain extreme cases.

     We figured this out after surprised

word missing there

"we"

_<  I hope that didn't make it into the version I

sent to RAAC.

     In the mean time,

meantime

Again, not according to Marcus.  (...trust me, you
don't want to hear him elaborate on why. o_o )

Hey, maybe whoever it

was reads this blog.

If so, thank you!

Heh. I think we already know how this one would turn
out.

But you already read the prior version.  You know most
of the ending.

     I said mecha are impractical for most uses,

right?  But what if

Mega really wanted to start selling mecha, at a

high markup?  Make its

own market!  Convince the public there are mecha

criminals at large,

who might be able to get away time and again, but

at least mecha

police can chase them away.  Mega's large enough

to buy up almost any

competitor, except those who can't be bought, like

Lower City.  But

those competitors can be discredited, say if

they're identified as 

the
source of mecha criminals.

Heh. Nice.

Again, inspired from reality.  There's no market for
something?  Manufacture one.  Standard marketing
tactic.  And arms dealers stereotypically sell to both
sides of any conflict...

I know.  Sorry for accusing you, but I knew the

real crooks were

reading my blog.  There aren't many mecha pilots,

but Bananas' post

reminded me of what you told me: Mega makes robot

backups of all its

employees, including a certain test piloting crew.

Who better to put

in the role of the criminals?  And if I ever did

figure it out, they

could kill off any of the originals not loyal to

Mega, to cover their

tracks.

Wait, you mean they're sending a hit squad?

This is a nice touch. I honestly like this.

Making key points of the plot seem like
inconsequential parts of the background is an art I
should practice more.  It gets such good results when
it works.

Ha! Very nice work. Good unfolding of events, and I
definitely liked the
switch to it not being the real people and just
being robot doubles.  Text
flowed nicely, since it was all first person. I'd
like to say more, but this
definitely worked for me.

Thank you.  ^_^

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