As I'm part writer... :D
----- Original Message -----
From: "Arthur Hansen" <arthur@kindred.net>
To: "Chris McFadden" <nightwindssong@adelphia.net>; <ffml@anifics.com>
Sent: Sunday, June 27, 2004 8:24 PM
Subject: [FFML] Re: Hikari no Daija (The Serpent of Light)
----- Original Message -----
From: "Chris McFadden" <nightwindssong@adelphia.net>
To: <ffml@anifics.com>; <SnakeWhoLived@yahoogroups.com>
Sent: Sunday, June 27, 2004 2:50 AM
Subject: [FFML] Hikari no Daija (The Serpent of Light)
Hello, all. Andrew Norris, myself and the crew of #Akane are
working on a
new story that will turn Hogwart's upside down as new students
are arriving
during Harry Potter's second year. The Prologue, "Revelation in
Nerima" is
now posted on my site, HYPERLINK
"http://nightwindssong.anifics.com/"http://nightwindssong.anifics
.com, as
well as a picture of one of the new students in their Hogwart's
robes on the
fan art page.
Pretty good and easy to read, but there seem to be logical
plot-holes (cliches) of fandom.
While I'm not totally adverse to non-cannon pairings, they need
to be fairly carefully set up. This one isn't. Yes, Akane *can*
be a bitch at points, but she does show she cares about Ranma. To
have her *totally* ignore Ranma's plight and being stuck as a
child isn't just contrary to the series as a whole, it's totally
against that particular story *arc*.
First: Akane _has_ a HISTORY of being stuck in a route. She's just found
out her pet pig is Ryouga.... She's _not_ thinking clearly. Give her time.
You'll see her general feelings, in ... Year 2.
Nabiki, likewise, is about as OOC as you can have and still be
vaguely recognizable.
*shrugs* It's quite possible that she's playing a game. I'd say that while
you have a point, espically at the timing of the Manga, in question... it's
a toss up. (Post 38? Not a chance, I can't see it. she's TOO much into the
money)
(BTW: This isn't my idea... I'm not _pro_ later Nabiki.)
Most of the rest sounds quite neat. I had never thought to see
Ranma de-aged by the mushrooms and then sent to Hogwarts. A cool,
new plot twist.
To quote a _good_ HP writer (Akuma sama) "Not enough anime/HP Xovers!" Well,
Akuma sama! here you go! (and others!)
Truth is, I've always had a hankering to do something along these lines, but
never quite got all my ducks in a row, until MiriOhki came up with this
idea... so I decided to help.
The Happosai thing seems very forced as it is presented. Perhaps
too neatly tied up would be a better description. Really, I can't
see him giving the school's mastery like that. Heck, I'd say that
it would almost have to be gotten by the cliched "beaten by the
student fairly" plot.
Happosai's been shown to be weird, on occasion. He _knows_ He won't have
much, if any contact wtih Ranma... and Ranma -has- beaten him, several
times. (Fairly? This _IS_ anything goes, old bean... as long as it works,
you use it)
He's also aware that his life's at a end. I can see him deciding to go
ahead and end the games... after all, the games are fading, he's not a
peodphile, so any fun he could draw from Ranma-chan is gone... After a
certain point... toss up. Mabye the best way, is a letter later on in Year
one, showing him passing away?
Had to LOL the Amazon thing. And really, that seems
counter-intuitive. Not only is Cologne pretty much a lore-master
sort, but Shampoo and herself have been shown to brew potions.
Maybe it would be more appropriate to show her as nearly a squib,
and that Shampoo reasons for messing up potions is that she
doesn't have any real magical ability.
One thing I've noted in the HP books, the really confiendent SOBS
(Voldermort, Albus) save their magic. When it's possible, why waste it.
Quite possibly... Also, it's NOT shown if magical ability goes down with
Age. Perhaps why Ablus is unsure that he can't defeat Voldermort, is simply
becasue, even without the propechy, he's just too weak? (Hell, _I_ see a
easy way. Beat the ever living hell out of Voldermort, break all his bones,
snap his wand, cut his throat, THEN let Harry stake his ass. Then again,
_I_ don't fight fair. :D)
Happosai would have to have some minor magical talent. Perhaps in
the Orient it isn't *strictly* squib-muggle/Wizard and there are
intermidiate steps.
Actually, you're going to learn in _our_ setting, that the Europeans are
utter idiots across the board. UNLIKE the Japanese and American boys and
girls. (Chi/Ki masters, Grandmasters in arts, are ranked equal to magi (US
term for witches and wizards) in Japan and China for example.)
One point, and something that someone caught, is... the Amazon law comment.
While _intended to_ maximize magical offspring... inbreeding is _bad_.
(and that's why Shampoo is magi-blood, not magi)
Be warned: Hogwart's is never going to be the same as chaos
fills the
school's halls, alliances are formed and sanity is rent
asunder.
Miriani
Hope that helps. Please do keep the FFML updated on this story.
I'd like to see it succeed as a good story!
Arthur Hansen
We'll try.
Andrew Norris
MageOhki
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