Suggested changes: {before : after}
On 06/22/2004 08:52 PM, DB Sommer said:
The first version of this seems to have been lost in the ether. So
I'm resending it
That may have been a message from G... nevermind.
Azumanga Royale (Both the Original Version and Director's Cut) [Oh
yeah, it's an Azumanga Daioh/Battle Royale fusion]
Doesn't this belong in with those fusions that should never be? :}b
[Forward: Come on, you know someone had to mix the two. This is a
parody, so don't think for one second I'm taking a serious look at a
merging of the two. As in the tradition of much Japanese cinema,
there will be huge amounts of blood and gratuitous violence.]
So get to the good stuff already.
Osaka scratched her head curiously. "Aren't teachers supposed to wear
gas masks on field trips?"
Nice foreshadowing.
They looked around, students searching for those they knew best and
quickly joined their sides. It soon became evident that not only was
everyone present, but they had picked up an extra member: Kaorin, who
was dressed in her class uniform as well. They also noticed that
everyone was wearing identical gunmetal gray collars around their
necks. {They items : They : The collars} were clasped at the back
with a complex electronic locking mechanism. People began to handle
the unfamiliar adornments.
"It was the only question I got right," Osaka said sadly.
^_^;
"K...Kaorin-chan!" Kimura gurgled as his arms began to rise.
"I'm getting better!"
"No! With all of them dead, I'm going to have to learn a whole new
seating plan!" Yukari buried her head in her hands and sobbed into
the desk once again.
At least that shows _some_ feelings.
Perhaps a stuffed cat wasn't the best thing to kill a fellow student
after all.
Maybe she should have asked for a raw cauliflower.
Osaka struck Chiyo in the head again, eliciting another yelp. Osaka
sighed. "Hold still, this might take a while."
I like Osaka. She's always so polite.
"That would be the navy, not the army, and I'm surprised they haven't
lost one yet either," the colonel said in both pride for his own
branch of the military and contempt for the other. "In any case, this
happened at the base {: where} you requisitioned your weapons. Now it
seems the paperwork regarding what you took hasn't been processed
yet, so I wanted to make sure you weren't the one who took it."
"There's one thing you're forgetting: setting off a device like that
is suicidal. Now who would be stupid enough to do that?"
...
Akemi turned on her charm and the smile that had won her several
prestigious news awards. "It is now my duty, honor, and privilege to
present to you the winner of this year's Battle Royale, Female
Student #37: Osaka... um, just Osaka."
But, is she smiling?
"You mean I don't have to use the weapon I was given?"
"Of course not. You can use any weapon you get your hands on."
Osaka stared at her fan in betrayal. "Darn."
There's a real Osaka moment.
In any case, she'd have to transfer again, and hopefully this time
she could avoid killing everyone she knew. It was tiring. Especially
for her arms. Although if she did, she'd think she'd try killing
everyone with a rubber band. That would probably be a lot better
weapon that a paper fan.
And another.
And thus the fic ends. Hope you enjoyed it, in a macabre sort of way.
I expected nothing, ah, less.