Subject: [FFML] [C&C][Originalish][TWPOS] Looking For The Perfect Drink
From: Michael A Chase
Date: 9/9/2003, 3:54 PM
To: DB Sommer , ffml@anifics.com


Suggested changes: {before : after}

Originalish?  The emphasis is on 'ish', right? :})

On Tue, 9 Sep 2003 14:02:44 -0400 DB Sommer <sommer@3rdm.net> wrote:

While I wait for one more prereader to get back to me on the part of
the 'Things' interlude I'm in the middle of, I decided to finally
release this.  Not my best work, but I enjoy using the characters,
and it serves as a break in writing for me, and given the somber
nature of the interlude, mindless comedy is a nice change of pace.

They are a fun bunch.  Calling D'Amour mindless may be a bit over
generous though...

Captain D'Amour brushed his blue mantle over his shoulder before
leaning back in the cushioned chair provided by his rather rotund
host, Wei Lo.  The restaurant D'Amour was currently in (located on
the fifth floor of a building also owned by Lo) was loud and
extravagant, exactly as had been described to him by others that had
dined there before.  Expensive gourmet food, lavish decorations with
a Southeast Asia motif, elaborate floor shows for entertainment, and
the most important detail of all, one of the {largest : best} stocked
bars in the Orient, were all present.  Even now D'Amour could see a
huge table {only holding : barely supporting} a hundred filled
glasses of champagne off to the side.  It was like a slice of heaven.

It was a shame his first choice of companion, his ship's Exotic
Dancer (and back up physician) Bubbles, couldn't come along.  He had
asked her --using all the considerable charm he could muster-- yet
despite that she had been unwilling to accompany him, making her
reluctance known when one of her scalpels 'slipped,' the blade nearly
impaling the captain's crotch.  A lesser man, ignorant in the ways of
women, would have misinterpreted the sign as disinterest.  But
D'Amour was experienced and could read between the lines.  She wanted
him, but wasn't quite ready to admit it to herself.

And might not be for quite a while.

"That's 'Captain'," D'Amour corrected and looked over the man he was
conducting this business transaction with.  Lo was dressed in an
impeccable white suit that reeked of money.  D'Amour had no doubts
the outfit cost more than what he paid his entire crew in a month.
It was such a waste.  No suit in the world could make the corpulent
cow attractive to members of the opposite sex.  The man had to weigh
over three hundred pounds, and that was on a five-five frame.  He
might as well have worn a sweat suit and saved the money.

D'Amour pays his crew?

"It's true," Aki said.  She removed her stole and showed it to him.
Attached to one end was a large, irate, albino mutant killer ape
head. Its fangs were bared, and even dead, the creature appeared
vicious and eager enough to still greedily chomp on anyone that dared
draw too close.

Take that, Greenpeace.

"Hung Lo, eh?  A lot of guys say that, but only some of us are
telling the truth."  D'Amour doubled over in laughter.

He may have been the only one, since it was his name.  If Lo is related
to Hung Lo, shouldn't his name be something like Hung Over?

The waiter, awed by the speed, hesitated a moment before removing the
other glass and placing it next to Aki.  Or tried to place it next to
her.  Instead, just as he released his grip on the stem of the
crystal D'Amour snatched that glass too.  Placing the first back on
the tray, he downed the second even faster.

Lo appeared distraught at the move.

I imagine D'Amour's been poisoned enough times to have built up
resistance to most anything.

"The hell I will!  You think I won't lose my temper over you watering
down your drinks?!"

He may not have morals, but he has his priorities.

"Actually, it didn't cost me a thing.  She let me take her place
under the condition you didn't leave here alive."

D'Amour snorted in derision.  "As though you expect me to believe
that.  She's one of the most loyal members of my crew."

It sounds like she is.  She only wants him dead.

As he looked the sea of alcohol over, it occurred to him that if the
antidote had fallen into one of the glasses, the stopper had come
undone, and someone tossed aside the vial, he would have no way of
knowing which glass now contained the antidote.  There was only thing
to do to ensure his survival.

I could smell that one coming.

Lao braced a hand against the table of drinks, and was amazed to see
a familiar vial sticking out of one of the glasses.  Her catlike grin
resurfaced at the sight of the familiar item.  She fished it out of
the drink and slid the vial down the front of her dress.  She patted
it, making certain it was affixed snugly in her {brassier : brassiere},
before returning to the battle.

I first took that for brasier, which would make her one hot chick.

D'Amour ran his hands through his hair in frustration.  "I'm not sure
it's worth it.  People are going to think the wrong thing, and it'll
ruin my reputation."

Aaahh, yeah.

"Skanky and stupid.  What a combination."  D'Amour said to her
semi-conscious form as he rubbed his neck, trying to return the flow
of blood to it and remove the marks her fingertips had left digging
into his flesh.

You know he wants her.

"I'm never coming here to drink again.  I still can't believe that
cheap bastard watered down his drinks."  D'Amour shook his head in
disappointment.

Definitely has his priorities.

Aki began to slowly cry.  She had been so close to losing him this
time, too.  Maybe it was time to take up alcoholism as a hobby.  It
was the only way to deal with the misery in her life that no one
could remove from it.

I do feel sorry for Aki.  There's got to be something wrong if she
keeps finding her way back to TWPOS.  What kind of Hibiki is she?

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