In a message dated 1/28/2003 2:30:07 PM Eastern Standard Time, 
allynyonge0000@netscape.net writes:

       Aaaaaand, continuing on from Part 1:

   "Actually, he's our problem as well." Everyone turned
in shock at the sudden intrusion, to see a tiny form, shrouded
in some dark, heavy material.

       Everyone:  "COLOGNE!"
       Cologne:  "What is this, Cheers?"

   "What store did you say Saotome Genma was in?"
came the politely worded request in faintly accented Japanese.

       Sug:  "The question was phrased politely, in faintly accented 
Japanese."

   "I . . .I know you!" Akane stared at the figure, her
body automatically going into a defensive stance.

   "I apologize for the other night," came the mild
rejoinder, "and will gladly make whatever apologies and
reparations you think right. But first, please, which store?"

       Repetition of "apology."  I'd drop the second one and have her just 
offer reparations.

   "Ummm . . .Matsuzakaya," Akane replied, "But he's
not there anymore. He saw me and uhhh . . .he left." She
finished miserably, feeling as if she'd done something wrong.

       But what?

   "He _saw_ you?" Ranma forgot about the stranger,
becoming angry at Akane again. "Why didn' you tell me that
first!"

       Oh... THAT.

   "S . . .sorry," Akane stuttered as Ranma shook her.

       Were her teeth rattling?  (:)

   "What happened, what did he do?"

   "N . . nothing," Akane waited for her brain to stop
bouncing around. "He just saw me. He got this _angry_ look
on his face," she felt a slight chill remembering the ugly look
of rage on his face, "and he ran off."

       Repetition of "look."  Sug:  "...remembering the expression of 
rage..."

   "Crap!"

   "Succinctly put," the stranger agreed with a sigh.

       "Hey, I don't suck nothin`!"

   "Who th' hell are you!"

   "Another of your friends?" Nabiki asked Ranma
tiredly, not able to cope with any more strangeness. Ukyou
stepped beside her and covered Nabiki's hand with one of his,
giving a silent squeeze of comfort.

       Nabiki:  My wierd-shit-o-meter has topped out for the day.  At this 
point, nothing phases me anymore.
       I must say, the Nabiki/Ukyou dynamic is proceeding nicely.  

   "I've never seen you in my life." Ranma stated
positively.

       Mmmmmaybe "definitely" instead of "positively"?

   "Shan P'u sends her love," the stranger chuckled.

   "Amazons!" Ranma spat, taking an offensive stance.
"Bring it on!"

   "Prepare to die!" the garden doors crashed open under

       Monk:  "Hey, that's MY line!"
       Mu Si:  "Not in THIS fic -- I get the line, and *you're* the blind 
one."

the impact of a boy wielding a pair of broad bladed swords.
Instantly Kodachi whirled to confront this newcomer, her
sword springing into her hand. Akane gave a gasp of outrage
as Ranma pushed her behind him, while Nabiki felt a strange
sense of relief as Ukyou stepped protectively in front of her
wheel-chair.

       Wheelchair.

   "Mu Si," the shrouded figure snapped, "I told you to
wait in the car."

   "I'm not going to let this scum escape justice," the
boy hotly protested. "Shan P'u had to run the gauntlet
because of you. She's disgraced. Ruined!" His voice broke as
he started a slashing lunge toward Ranma.

   "Mu Si!"

   Nabiki blinked. She hadn't seen the tiny figure move,
but suddenly it was across the room and the boy's swords
dropped from nerveless fingers.

   "Apologize, then remove yourself at once!"

   "But . . ."

   "Who is Shan P'u?" Akane asked, stepping from
behind her husband.

   "His wife!" The newcomer spat.

       Ranma, it was nice knowing you...

   "Wife?"

   The room went still as Akane turned to face Ranma.
"Wife?"

   "No, it ain't nuthin' like that!" Ranma stepped back, a
horrified look on his face. "That was just some stupid village
tradition. I ain't never really married anyone but you!"

   "Oh my," Nabiki felt an hysterical giggle bubble up in
her throat at the look on Ranma's face. "This is going to be
good." She leaned forward, anticipating blood and carnage as
Akane ripped Ranma into tiny, tiny pieces.

       "Geez, are you *still* upset about the mortgage thing?  I *said* I was 
sorry!"

   "Okay," Akane said simply, slipping Ranma's hand
into hers.

       Fortunately, Ukyou caught Nabiki before she could faceplant...

   "What!" Shaking feeling back into his arms Mu Si
looked at Akane in outrage. "You're going to believe that
lying dog! He seduced my sweet innocent Shan P'u - - "

   "Innocent!" Ranma snorted. "Shan P'u taught me stuff
that would embarrass a Shanghai whore . . .uhhhhh . . ."
Ranma winced as he realized what he'd just said. "Uhhhh . . .I
can explain."

       Amazing.  The Anything-Goes School of Both-Feet-In-Mouth?

   "Explain how you seduced and abandoned Shan P'u!"
Mu Si cried, his face twisted in rage. "Explain how you used
your evil power to distract her from her duty so your father
could steal our sacred treasures!"

       Nabiki:  "What 'evil power'?"
       Akane <dreamy>:  "Oh, Sis, don't you *wish* you knew..."
       Nabiki:  <turns green>

   "I never did nuthin' she didn't want! And my ol man

       Need apostrophe after ol'.

didn't do nuthin' but copy some of your old scrolls!"

   "Lying bastard!"

   "Ranma," Akane stepped in front of Ranma, placing a
gentle hand on his chest. "Did you make love to . . .to this
girl?"

   This ran a close second to repeating the Neko-ken
training of heading the list of all the things on earth he didn't
want to do. Frantically his mind worked, trying to think of an

       First line needs work.  Sug:  "On the list of all the things on earth 
he *didn't* want to do, answering this question ran second only to repeating 
the Neko-Ken training."

answer to this question that couldn't be contradicted by
anyone present, yet didn't involve a lot of pain and possibly a
few broken bones. A lifetime of Genma's training, dodging
the law in sixty countries and living life on the edge had honed
his wit to razor-sharp edge. In a milisecond he examined and
discarded a hundred different schemes, until he hit upon the
perfect solution.

   "Yes."

   He'd never tried the truth before.

       Wow, his instincts *are* good.  A lifelong con artist realizes that 
only the truth can save his @$$ now...

   "Did you seduce her?"

   There was absolutely no expression on Akane's face,
but somehow Ranma couldn't convince himself this was a
good thing.

       Like, Duh.  Then again, this is *Ranma* we're talking about.

   "No."

   The sheer novelty of it might just save him.

       He really didn't?  Wow.

   "Did you promise to marry her?"

   "N . . no."

   Or get him killed.

   "No?"

   He watched her nostrils flair slightly and felt like a
man in avalanche country who hears a pebble falling from the
slope above his head.

   "Sha . . .she wanted ta marry me. An' I didn't exactly
push her away when she started tryin' to convince me. But I
_never_ promised her nuthin'." He looked her straight in the
eye, feeling enormously virtuous. He'd let Shan P'u _think_

       And the really sad thing is, he's got real cause to feel virtuous... 
by comparison.  Oh, Ranma, you've got such a deep hole to climb out of....

he would marry her, but he'd never actually _promised_ her
anything.

   "Do you deny that you made love to her while she was
on duty, so that your _father_," Mu Si spat the word, "could
sneak in and loot our treasury."

       Need "?"

   "Dammit, if you hadn't been so tight assed about
lettin' us inta your stupid ol' temple, none o' this woulda
happend."

   "So it's OUR fault for making it hard for you to rob
us!" Mu Si's voice broke as he choked on his anger.

       "Yeah!  Look what you made me do!"

   "You seem awfully complacent about your father's
deeds," the tiny figure broke it's silence at last. "You feel no
remorse for what you did?"

   "I . . .nuthin' bad happened to Shan P'u, did it?"
Ranma muttered.

       After all, answering that question honestly would reveal he has the 
rudiments of a consience, and only rubes and suckers have those.
       Speaking of which... just where *did* that money in Ukyou's shoe, way 
back when, come from?  I've got a prime suspect right here...

   "A few scars on her back from running the gauntlet,
which will heal. Some scars on her heart," Ranma flinched
from the look on Akane's face as the Amazon spoke, "which
may keep her from such foolishness in the future. But, what
of your father?"

       This is an awfully complacent attitude for Cologne to take.  OTOH, 
after seeing how she handled the Russian Invasion (Immigration?) last 
chapter, it makes sense.

   "Hell, he just copied your dumb scrolls." Licking his
dry lips Ranma looked at Akane. "See, there's bunches of
people who'll pay big bucks for old books and stuff. An' th'
ol man ran across a box fulla really old parchment in a junk
shop in Shanghai. So he was gonna make copies of these old
scrolls an' sell 'em to collectors as originals he'd found. Only
the Amazons," he jerked a thumb at Mu Si and the robed
figure. "wouldn't let outsiders look at their stuff. So . . .I . . .
uhhhh . . .distracted Shan P'u while she was guardin' the door
and th' old man snuck in an' copied th' stuff."

       And what's really sad is that he believes that.

   "You didn't promise marriage" Akane said softly, "but
you let her think you had."

   The cocky grin slid off Ranma's face. How the _hell_
did Akane know . . .?

   "You took advantage of her love for you."

   "Hell, she didn't lo - - "

   Akane pressed her palm against his lips. "Yes, she did.
You're an arrogant, conceited, macho jerk.  And, I'm not
certain I like you very much right now. But, you're very easy
to love." Akane turned away, leaving Ranma frozen in place
as she walked to the shrouded figure and, awkwardly because
of her brace, knelt before the Amazon, pressing her forehead
to the floor.

       And somewhere in Ranma's head, a voice is screaming "how does she DO 
that to me?"
       After all, con men never feel shame.  Right?  So why does seeing her 
disappointment hurt so much?

   "Please forgive my husband," Akane's voice was low,
but clear. "For the things he has done, the hurt he has caused.
He is a dutiful son and willingly carried out his father's
wishes. In accordance with giri,  he took his father's
transgressions as his own, as his wife I willingly accept this
burden as my own. I beg you to forgive him and punish me in
his place."

   "What th' hell!" Ranma lunged forward. "Get th' hell
up off th' floor. My wife don't bow to nobody!"

       Getting pissed is easier than thinking about what she was just 
offering to do for you...

   "Why?" The tiny figure asked. "Why would you do
this? Love? Duty?"

   Akane didn't answer and Ranma's heart went cold.

       And, again.

   "Punishment will only harden his heart," Akane
answered at last. "And I would lose him, forever. Not just the
boy he is, but the man he could become."

       Well, that answers that question.  She really *does* see him, like 
clear water.  

   "Ha," the figure chuckled, "you're a gambler I see."

   "Will . . .will you let me take his debt - - "

   "If we start talking debts," the figure said, still
chuckling, "then we'd have to add in some of our own
transgressions, such as breaking into your home, the use of
'Dragons Breath'," she shot a loot at Mu Si, who ducked his
head, "and our little tet a tet in an alley. So, why don't we
consider our debt with your husband canceled?"

       Very pragmatic.  But I also bet that Cologne likes what she sees in 
Akane.  So why not be magnaminous?

   A tiny gesture from the figure and Mu Si helped
Akane to her feet.

   "There is still the matter of Genma." the Amazon
continued.

       Fatman, OTOH, is *toast.*

   "Are you still goin' on 'bout that?" Ranma was still
reeling from what Akane had just done. She said she loved
him all the time, but that was just words. This was . . .what
did Akane really mean?  Lots of girls had told him they loved
him, but Pop. . .

       Ah... paradigm shifts.  Always painful.

   * 'I love you',* Genma mimicked in a falsetto, *Don't
believe 'em boy. 'I love you' is just the hook and you're the
poor stupid fishie. Women use words like a man uses his fists,
and they need to lie like a man needs to breath. Don't believe
'em, never trust 'em.*

       But do believe your own eyes?

   What was Akane - -

   " . . .robbed our treasury," the tiny figure was saying.
"Not only the scrolls he was 'copying', but artifacts, jewels,
currency,  every thing we had. Money we need for machine
tools, medicine, seed . . .everything."

   "That's a lie," Ranma shouted, glad to be detracted

       Distracted.

from trying to figure out women. "Pop never stole nuthin'
from you. He just copied those dumb scrolls. Me an' Pop
planned th' whole thing. We're partners. He wouldn' never
do somethin' like that without tellin' me first."  Uneasily

       And the lies begin to unravel.  But Ranma's got a lot invested, 
emotionally, in *believing* those lies...    

Ranma recalled the truck Genma had insisted they use for
their getaway. At the time Genma claimed he'd wrenched his
knee, and couldn't travel far on foot. But - -

   "Why would we lie?" The tiny figure asked
reasonably.

   "You're a woman," Ranma knew that the Amazon's

       No apostrophe here -- it's not posessive.

almost never let their men leave home. And would certainly
never let a man be in charge of an important mission.

       I didn't understand this line at first.  Then I realized -- he can't 
tell that Cologne is female!  (Assuming it *is* Cologne).  Of course, that's 
not so hard to understand.

"Women don't need a reason to lie." He felt better after
saying that. It helped make Akane's strange behavior, if not
understandable, at least less threatening.

       Running to hide behind old habits, eh Ranma?

   "I am lying, because you father told you differently?
And he never lies?"

   "Not to me!" Ranma retorted with the assurance of
someone stating the sun would rise in the east. "He'd never lie
ta me. Pop an' me are a team. Partners. Th' only person ya
can trust is your partner. Th' rest are just marks."

       That HAS to be true.  It has to be.  Because if it's not...

   "Would you trust your mother?" The figure asked
softly.

   "My . . .That lying, thieving whore!" Ranma's face
twisted with such rage and hatred that Akane stumbled back,
frightened of Ranma for the very first time. "I'm glad she's
dead! She said she loved my Pop, but that was just a lie,"
Ranma raged. "She just wanted stuff, an' when he ran out of
money, she made him steal. An' when he got caught, she left
him."

       Damn, he actually managed to frighten Akane?  That means we've never 
seen him this angry before now...
       And... ouch.  Is Nodoka hearing this?  

   Shanking with anger as he recalled what his mother
had done, he could hardly speak. "Filthy whore. She was
runnin' around on him from the start. She used him, an'
laughed at him . . ." he rounded on Akane, grabbing her and
shaking her like a rag doll. "Just like you. Like YOU!" He
threw her from him in disgust. "You're tryin' ta fool me, like
that bitch fooled Pop. Then you're gonna laugh at me. But
I'm too smart. You ain't gonna laugh at me! I'm - - "

       Oh, crap.  He can't let go of his faith in Genma, because if he does 
nothing he's ever done means anything.  But he's going to lose Akane if he 
doesn't open his eyes...

   "Ranma?" Soft voice full of wonder and longing the
slender woman, dressed in simply in wool skirt and silk
blouse, stepped into the room. "I'm sorry to intrude," she
apologized, her eyes never leaving Ranma, " but I heard
shouting. Ranma?"

   A sense of dread closed around him as this gentle
featured woman took another step into the room. Soft
feathery curls framed her pleasantly plain features and her
eyes reflected a friendly trusting nature.

       No mention of how (or if) she resembles his girl form?

   "Who are you!" Ranma snarled, backing away from
this woman, more afraid than he'd ever been in his life. Some
instinct warned him to flee.

       Your heart knows, Ranma.

   "Oh, my baby. My precious." She reached a
wondering hand to gently caress his face. "I'm your mother,
Nodoka."

   "You're crazy!" he slapped her hand away, face ashen.
"My mom's dead."

       She has to be, after all.  Because if she's not...

   "You were such a good baby," Nodoka couldn't take
her eyes from his face, "such a healthy appetite, you never got
tired of eating. And so vigorous. You could cry for hours and
hours," she remembered proudly. "I remember how often you
drove poor Genma away for days at the time. It kept him
from getting a job, but I didn't mind working. They let me
keep you with me while I sewed, and that gave me more time
with my precious."

       Ouch.  Are you sure you want Nodoka to echo Gollum, here?

   She pulled a locket from around her neck and opened
it to reveal a picture of a decades younger Nodoka and
Genma holding a scowling red-faced infant. Beside the
picture, tied with a blue ribbon, was a lock of soft, dark hair.
"And now you've grown to be such a handsome young man."

   "You crazy bitch!" Ranma gasped. "My mom is dead.
She ruined Pop, drove him to drink. She whored around, an'
she died. He told me. He - - " his voice broke and whirling he
dashed out into the garden and flowed over the wall like a
running panther.

       I wonder if Cologne knew, or suspected, that Ranma was even more 
Genma's victim than anyone else?  I'll bet yes -- that would help explain her 
restraint in dealing with him.

   "Ukyou?" Naibiki rubbed the bridge of her nose,
feeling another headache coming on.

   "Yeah?" Seeing Nabiki's grimace Ukyou began
working on a knotted muscle in Nabiki's back and was
rewarded with a sigh of pleasure.

       She's got him well-trained, doesn't she?
       Nabiki:  "Hey, for devotion like this, going lesbo is no big deal."
       Ukyou:  "What do you mean?  I'm a guy, dammit!"
       Nabiki:  .......

   "I was wrong." Nabiki said wearily. "I think singing
okonomoyaki is an idea whose time has come." God, after the
soap opera her life had become, electric okonomoyaki and
cross dressing  Enka singers would be a breath of normalcy.

       It probably wouldn't fit here, but at some point I hope you address 
what Ukyou saw during this argument -- did he begin to see that Ranma was a 
victim as well, or is he still blinded by his own obsession?

   "Go," the tiny figure ordered Mu Si, "follow and
report his movements." Mu Si hesitated only an instant before
dashing out the broken door and over the wall.

   "With luck," the robed figure remarked to the room at
large, "he will lead us to Genma. In the meantime, I suggest
we wait together."

   There was a commotion at the front door and Nabiki
twisted the joystick on her wheelchair, turning half-way
around.

       Halfway.  One word.

   "Kasumi? We're in here. And we have visitors."

   It wasn't Kasumi. The blind Yamabushi stumbled
around the corner, a small battered form cradled in his arms.

   "Sasuki!" Kodahci gasped, running to take the limp
body from his arms. "What villainy is this?"

   "I am sorry, mistress," the small man croaked, "I
fought him. But he was too strong."

       Fought who?  The Yamabushi?  But he's *here*... 
       Oh, crap.  It actually took me a second to make the connection.  

   "Fought! Fought who? Who was too strong? Where is
. . . my lady?" she whispered in a small voice. Clutched in the
small ninja's hands was a familiar book-bag. With horror
Kodachi saw that it was stained dark with blood. "Where is
my lady!"  But Sasuki's head rolled back as he lost his battle
to stay conscious.

   "Gone! Stolen." the blind monk grated, sliding down
the wall in exhaustion. "I thought to question the sister . . .
Kasumi, again," Kodachi growled in outrage and the monk
chuckled tiredly. "Just talk. Over tea perhaps. Sometimes I
learn from my mistakes." He wheezed, as if tired from his run
carrying Sasuki. " My spirit sight told me she was the key to
finding Genma. I knew she'd come back to the University,
sooner or later. Today she did."

       Huh.  A Ryouga who learns from his mistakes.  Who'da thunk it?
       I don't think "Tired" is strong enough, here.  Sug "exhausted."
       And his spirit sight was right.  Sucks to be him, don't it?

   "What happened?"

   "Genma happened. He grabbed her as she started to
get into a car." He motioned to the still figure of Sasuki laying
on the couch, Kodachi holding one of Sasuki's hands as she
spoke rapidly into a cell phone. "The little fellow tried to stop
him. I think he actually hurt Genma," the monk sounded
amazed. "but that just made Genma mad and he took some
time to really work the little guy over."

       "But" is starting a new sentence, and needs to be capped.

   "And you stood by and did nothing?" Kodachi stalked
over to the monk, outraged. "Coward! Can you do nothing
but assault women? On your feet and face me!" She grabbed
the monk, who screamed in agony.

       I take it she finished her cellphone call?

   "What . . .?"  White faced Kodachi removed the
monks concealing hat, to reveal a bloody ruin where his face
had been. With a strangled groan Nabiki lurched to her feet
and made a stumbling run for the bathroom, accompanied by
Ukyou.

       I... don't think you need to be any more graphic.  In fact, I'd 
appreciate it if you weren't.

   "Your arm is broken," the tiny Amazon knelt down
and ran expert hands over the monk. "Several ribs as well.
You have a punctured lung and other internal injuries."

       "Have you ever heard of the Breaking Point?"

   "I am sorry," Kodachi said, knowing how inadequate
that sounded.

   "Next . . .time." The monk wheezed, blood bubbling
around his lips. "I won't . . .go . . .so easy on him."

       You and what army?  Although I suspect that an army may be in the 
offing, before long...

   "I called the hospital again," Akane said quietly, "The
ambulance will be here in a few minutes."

       So who was Kodachi talking to?  
       Interesting comment on their lives lately, that she says "again."

   "Why?" Nabiki returned to the room, helped by
Ukyou who was holding a damp cloth to Nabiki's forehead.
"What does he want with Kasumi?"

   "He . . .left a . . .note," the monk whispered, one hand
fumbling at his waist. "In . . .my . . ."

   "I have it," Akane said, pulling a crumpled, bloody
piece of paper from a pouch at the monks belt. Across a sheet
of torn paper, in a bold scrawl, Genma had written his
demands.

       Sounds like two seperate pieces of paper.  

   **'Souun. You have my package. I have your girl.
Let's trade. Too slow, too bad.'**

       And Ranma just took off for the hills.  Gah.  When he finally 
confronts Genma and can't lie to himself any more, things are going to get 
ugly.  

       Well, Allyn, as usual, you've lived up to your ability to whipsaw the 
audience between laughter, tears, affection, and terror, usually multiple 
times in a single page.  Looking forward to the penultimate chapter...       


-- 
David McMillan, Imagineer at Large.  
Chief Systems Analyst and Integration Engineer, Exotic Technologies Division, 
  <Censored> GmBh.  Mecha and Weapons Design Specialist.
"Agent Mulder?  My name is Neo.  I believe I may be able to show you part of 
the truth you've been searching for.  I should warn you, however -- it's not 
what you think."
--



             .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
             | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
             | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
             |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
             `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'