----- Original Message -----
From: "Benjamin Goldberg" <goldbb2@earthlink.net>
To: "FFML" <ffml@anifics.com>
Sent: Thursday, August 01, 2002 12:38 AM
Subject: [FFML] Re: [fanfic][CCS] The Taming of the Clow chapter 1 (working
title)

Very nice story, but one minor note:

Clow Reed, in the cartoon, seems to be (in the *few* episodes I've seen
which starred him) mature and wise, not the irresponsible fellow you've
written.  That of course is easily fixable, if you include a comment
indicating that Clow is still fairly young, perhaps in his late teens
(old enough to be good at magic, but young enough to be irresponsible).
Perhaps something like:

   At that very moment, the lab's owner, a 19 year old man, was seated
at the desk, ....

I'm sure that over the course of your story, he'll grow up :)

    Hmm, beyond maturity, there's the fact that in the Manga at least, Clow
has the power to see the future.  Though if he aquires that ability while
he's serching for the cards. . .

PS: My email server claims that "Nidoking" <Nidoking@RC_Books.zzn.com>
is an invalid email address!  Any chance that you could get it changed
to something like Nidoking@rc-books.zzn.com?  (That is, a hyphen instead
of an underscore?  I *think* such a change would make it work.)

--
tr/`4/ /d, print "@{[map --$| ? ucfirst lc : lc, split]},\n" for
pack 'u', pack 'H*', 'ab5cf4021bafd28972030972b00a218eb9720000';

             .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
             | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
             | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
             |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
             `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'

             .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
             | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
             | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
             |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
             `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'