From: ffml-bounce@anifics.com [mailto:ffml-bounce@anifics.com] On Behalf
Of Roehl Sybing

The details didn't seem important.  Should it have been (I'm not being

facetious, I'm really asking)?

I'm not too sure myself. Just as long as you are certain and can keep
track of what happens when in your fic, your can clear up any confusions
should they arise.

Was there a section where he wasn't?  Again, there's no sarcastic wit

in there, again I'm really asking. >*g*

Can't remember right now. But that was definitely something I'd expect
Keiichi to do in the manga.

It was part of who she was, is it not? 

Ironically, I just realised that we never see that part of her much. It
was over after she granted Keiichi's wish. But you're right, that's the
part of her that wants to make people happy. These days Keiichi's
happiness is a bigger priority to her though.

I may have to spoil what remains of the story, but here goes: can it be

both?  As the rest of it plays out, Belldandy will _need_ to become a
goddess again.  She will refuse for any number of reasons for much of
the final chapter, but it takes Keiichi to convince her that he would
rather have her back the way she was than lose her entirely.

You choose a less-traveled path when you gave Belldandy a choice and had
her reject her divinity, with no further consequences beyond. Any other
fic that had her do so (that I've seen anyway) would have framed that
choice as lose-your-divinity-or-Keiichi. In your case, there was no such
pressure. It would be best if your could allow her to choose to regain
it without such pressure either. More on that below.

She will refuse for any number of reasons for much of the final

chapter,

I'd advise you to be careful how you write her refusal. Don't make it
seem like 'padding' the fic.

but it takes Keiichi to convince her that he would rather have her back

the way she was than lose her entirely.

I am not sure what you mean by 'lose her entirely'. But here's what I
consider taking the easy way out of the situation: 
Her insistence on remaining mortal will lead Belldandy to death or
insanity. In such a situation it will be obvious to the reader that
Belldandy will choose to revert to being a goddess, no matter how much
she refuses. All Keiichi's pleading and all her refusals will seem like
prolonging the inevitable- 'padding'. In this case, the best the author
can do is write a bittersweet yet effective scene where Bell is... Lost.
That's more effective than restoring the status quo IMO anyway.

Yet on the flip side, if the consequences of her choice weren't clear
enough, the result might be a muddle of a fic. That would be worse. Am I
making any sense?


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