Suggested changes: {before : after}
--
Mac :})
Give a hobbit a fish and he eats fish for a day.
Give a hobbit a ring and he eats fish for an age.
----- Original Message -----
From: "Danna Sean" <carrotglace@mindspring.com>
To: <ffml@anifics.com>
Sent: Tuesday, April 02, 2002 17:12
Subject: [FFML] Gaijin[part 16][SM]

    Michiri Kaiou was having a good day. The sun was shining, the air
was clear, and she had a recital that evening in front of a sold out
crowd. It was only a small theater downtown, but it was still a
thrill. She looked out her window at the rising sun and smiled in
contentment. Life was good.

I thought it was Michiru.

    The monster patted him on the head and smiled almost gently. "Go
back to bed."

    "Okay." Justin wandered back into his sheets and rolled onto his
side.

I loved that interaction.

    The last thing the man remembered after hearing his wife scream in
the background as the gourd slammed into his face and knocked him out
cold, was the terrible laughter the thing made when it flew away into
the moonlight.

That'll larn them.  I'm not sure how he'd recall the terrible laugh if he
was already knocked out though.

    The interior of the building was only a little familiar {too : to}

him.

He'd only been inside once, and was mostly trying to find his way to
the top at the time. Kajura had not yet delivered the plans for the
building, but they were expected {that evening sometime : some time that

evening}.

    "I've got a reason for getting these, and I doubt if it'll be
traced back to me once I get what I want with them. No one would have
even thought of looking for a connection between me and these {missing :

copied : stolen}

plans."

    Carrot was sitting on top of a rooftop staring at the two towers
in the distance with a frown on his face. Going back inside was not
something he was looking forward {too : to}. He owed Kajura a favor

though.

He sighed as he shifted his position on the rooftop and sighed. "Man,
this sucks."

    A flute slammed through the roof and poked upwards at his feet, he
jumped back and found himself backed against a door. It was a
stairwell that led into the building. The rumbling started again and
he jumped forward and slammed his shoulder into the door. It crashed
inward and he tumbled down the stairwell. When he hit the bottom of
the first {rung : flight} of stairs he fell on his rear and turned to look

up at

the roof again. The door closed with a slamming sound.

    One of the instruments, a cello, grew three times its normal size
in one of the orchestra member's grip. It shrieked angrily as its
strings came loose and began to flail about wildly.

    The musicians scattered {about wildly :}, running into the crowd and
away from the monster. Haruka growled as she realized that Michiri was
among them. The woman had a sort of icy calm about her though, much
like herself. "What the hell is that?"

    Haruka tensed herself to jump forward. Her strength was wavering
and she had already started to notice those around her falling to the
{ground : floor}. She growled and pooled her power, focusing her will as

best

she could. "No!"

    The boy jumped into the air with a yell and spun around as he
dodged the monster's strikes. He landed {on the ground :: on the floor}

roughly and

blinked as he looked around him. Over his head were several tight
lines that were obviously stuck deep into the wall behind him. "Oh
man."

    The creature jerked its tentacles back suddenly and parts of the
wall fell {onto the ground :: to the floor}. The boy rolled around the

debris and

managed to escape, but the monster was ready {too : to} attack again. As

soon

as he was on his feet he felt a sharp pain across his chest and was
thrown into the wall at the back of the stage. He hit hard and lost
most of his breath from the impact. It was hard enough to crack the
cement wall.

    He wasn't out though, he staggered to his feet and growled as he
clutched his chest with his free arm. There was a long gash there now
that bled freely. His shirt was torn, but it wasn't a deep wound.
"Damn. Those things are like razor wire!" He stepped back cautiously
as the thing kept its attention on him. He grabbed the discarded pole
from the {ground : floor} as he charged forward again.

    Carrot was committed to his strike, he shifted his weight as best
he could and hit higher than he had intended, striking the chords that
held the girl above the {ground : floor}. Reaching out with his arm after

the

completed strike, he grabbed her and pulled her down with him as he
landed from the jump. His face contorted as he realized that the
maneuver might have killed her. It definitely made her cuts deeper,
but she seemed alive, and was still conscious. She wasn't screaming
anymore though, probably because she was too weak.

    As soon as he hit the {ground : floor}, the {Youma : youma} attacked

again. He rolled

away and pulled the girl with him off the side of the stage as the
thing's tentacles cut chunks of the wooden floor away easily. He hit
the {ground : floor} with the girl on top of him and grunted in pain. He

found

himself inside the orchestra pit and shoved the girl off of him
roughly as he staggered to his feet. She was shaking badly, but it
didn't seem like she was any more than frightened at the moment.

    Haruka gasped as she watched the fight. She barely had enough
strength to stand at the moment and couldn't do anything to help. She
was caught between her personal anger, the odd {feeling : need} to protect
Michiri, and respect for the boy's actions so far.

    "You've sought your own path to evil!" cried a male voice from
behind him. Carrot lurched forward as he found himself stabbed in the
shoulder by a rose. His senses were too slow of a warning for him to
react in the condition he was in. He grunted in pain as he clutched at
the wound and glanced back over his shoulder at Tuxedo Mask. The fool
was standing on the rafters above the stage watching the events unfold
and ignoring the burning flames.

    Thinking quickly, the boy jammed another pole into the {ground :

floor}

where he had been standing as he jumped back. The lightning attack was
attracted to the pole and dissipated into the {ground : floor} harmlessly.
Carrot frowned as his legs tingled a little despite the fact that he'd
landed so far away. "Not good."

    Venus was holding a golden ball of energy in her hands with a huge
{looking :} scowl on her face.

    "You're alive!" cried the girl as she rushed up to him. He rushed
forward and grabbed her as the curtain above them finally burned away
and {crumpled to the ground : fell to the floor} in flames, blocking the

path she had taken

to get as far as she had.

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