In an effort to counteract the negative karma I gained by the blatant
self-promotion of my other post, I'm posting an actual fic!  This is, as
the title states, a quick mystery fusion: written in under an hour,
unspellchecked, unproofread, and many other mortal sins of the fanfiction
world, so read at your own risk. However, it _is_ linewrapped, and
hopefully will provide a chuckle or too, though whether you'll be
laughing with the fic or _at_ the fic is not yet determined.

With no further ado about nothing...


           Aaron Nowack
"Never let reality get in the way of a good hypothesis."
http://www.geocities.com/anowack/

Disclaimer moved to end of fic.


        Keiichi Morisato delivered a swift kick to the still moving body
of his foe.  That grenade he had scavenged had proved quite useful...
said foe's lower half was presently halfway across the room.  What could
only be called a nasty grin appeared on his face as he carefully
positioned the buisiness end of his recently acquired shotgun directly
between his foe's eyes.  "Die, bastard," he stated slowly, luxuriating
in the feeling of power.  A moment and a trigger-pull later, two
barrel's worth of shotgun ammo suceeded in turning his foe's head into
something vaguely resembling swiss cheese.

        Keiichi knew he had to keep moving.  No telling when they'd catch
up with him.  Therefore, he was already halfway down the corridor when
he discovered, upon searching his backpack for more ammo, that he had
delivered his last shotgun blast for some time.  With a weary sigh, he
paused and strapped the shotgun to his back, then pulled his sidearm out
from his holster.  The safety was turned off with a satisfying click,
and Keichi carefully approached the corridor's end.

        "Damn it!" he muttered under his breath.  It was a t-junction,
far more dangerous for him then a simple corner, as foes could approach
from either direction.  "Left or right... left or right..."  Keiichi
struggled with the decision for a while, until the muffled sounds of
pursuit from behind decided for him.  In one smooth, practiced motion,
he sidestepped into the next corridor, facing left with his gun in
firing position.  No enemies.

        The sound of gunfire alerted him to the fact that he should
probably have faced the other direction.  Keiichi did a quick 180,
dropping to the floor.  Four enemies, and one of them had a shotgun of
his own.  Keiichi rolled to avoid the incoming fire, salviating over the
thought of replacing his shotgun ammo.  Four shots to the head later,
Keiichi stood victorious over the bloody battlefield.

        Keiichi quickly divsted his fallen foes of their ammunition.
Carefully reloading his shotgun, he smiled.  The more powerful weapon
made him feel far more secure.  However, his joy at finding the ammo was
quickly surpassed by what he saw in the next room... a working satellite
uplink.

        Keiichi jumped into the station's seat, and was quickly logging
onto the Yggdrasil system and activating the voice communication
protocol.  He briefed a sigh of relief when he discovered that whatever
was keeping his radio from working wasn't stopping the uplink.
"Belldandy!"

        "Keiichi!  Are you alright?"

        "Apparently," he replied with a slight grin.  "Listen, do you
have maps of the Phobos moon base? I'm presently at station," and he
rattled off a quick sequence of numbers.

        "Just a moment.  Skuld is checking right now."

        A low growl sounded behind him.  "I don't think I have a
moment," Keiichi stated, then groaned as the connection was abruptly
severed.  He rose and turned around, pistol raised.  "Fucking demons."

Yes, oh tortured, er... beloved, readers.

It's nothing other than "Ah! Megami-sama! Knee-Deep in the Dead!"

Disclaimer: Ah! Megami-sama belongs to Kousuke Fujishima.
DOOM, on the other hand, belongs to iD Software, and is the greatest
First 
Person Shooter of all time.  

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