And finally getting a chance to get back to this:

"Look, we can ask each other questions all night, but we
can't understand each other.  Why don't you tell me all about it,
I'll smile and nod, and you'll feel better?" he asked,
demonstrating a practical streak.

Which makes him stick out like a sore thumb around this lot. :)

"One-"  She stopped and swallowed, then tried it again.
"One of the things you have to understand about Mihoshi is that
she's unbalanced.  She squeaks by on the psychological tests
every time.  They're the only tests she almost fails; in
everything else she's the top score.  Even," she added, "above
me."

Mihoshi: Just doing what comes naturally.

Kiyone continued.  "Basically, she doesn't get it.  But she
doesn't have to.  She's the luckiest person I've ever seen,

Sometimes its better to be lucky instead of good.

"The instructors did notice how much I tried to help her,
and as no one else wanted to, they put me as her partner.  I've
been stuck with her ever since.  Except that time I was framed
for a murder and spent six months in jail with a big woman named
Bertha.  Mihoshi freed me, somehow.  I couldn't understand her
explanation.  And the time I was frozen in carbonite by a super
villain and sold on the open market as a creative paperweight."

Heh. Nice to see she's had an interesting career.

Her hand clenched into a fist.  "Mihoshi ended up buying me
because, in her words, I reminded her of her old partner and she
wanted something to remember her by.

Heheheh.

She 'dusted and waxed me

everyday' for four months, because she liked the ambiance I gave
her room."

Cute.

"And then there was this last time.  Trapped aboard a
derelict ship, left behind because she thought I was dead, and I
finally get rescued a year later."  She paused and thought for a
minute.  "You know, now that I think about it, I haven't really
been her partner all that much."

Maybe Mihoshi would do just fine on her own.

"EWW!  Damned bats!" he yelled in surprise, flinging it
off.

You're just plain evil.

She smiled softly to herself, realizing what that gunk
probably was.  She then sat down heavily, both palms flat on the
ground.  Several deep breaths later, she cleared her throat and
began.  "Sorry about that," she apologized hesitantly.  "I'll
calm down."

She knows she was the cause of it? How odd. Most people wouldn't make the
connection.

frequently in English or French, and often in a mix of Spanish
and English.  The very next time they had gone to a karaoke bar,
Mihoshi had astonished her partner by being able to sing all of
the songs she had listened to perfectly, despite not knowing
exactly what she was singing.

Heh. Almost like a parrot.

gathering, walking with an exaggerated gait designed to draw
attention to their most prominent features, that of their large,
round posteriors.  It _had_ to be that song.

And here comes what you warned us about.

Mihoshi swallowed nervously at first, but she had never
been one to be very self-conscious.  With a sense of timing that
had occasionally won small prizes, she seemed to cast aside her
cheerful personality in favor of that of an 80's rap star.
Appropriate, really.

Or so we would assume. :)

Kiyone looked up as the sounds of music reached her ears,
along with Mihoshi's voice.  She listened for a moment, then
shook her head.  "She's doing it again."

Yep. That she is.

Dretric was starting to get an idea of the complex nature
of the relationship the two girls shared.  Privately, he
suspected that Kiyone had an inferiority complex.  The other girl
was friendlier, had managed to avoid getting lost, or at least he
assumed that she wasn't lost, and had bigger breasts.  So far as
he knew, those were matters of competition among women.

That and going after men.

"Baby got back," she said again, watching the villagers
dance.  Suddenly, she paused abruptly to look directly up,
tracking some thing only she could see.

Eyes like an eagle as well, I see.

The scatting pair also stopped immediately, as did the
young drummer and the man with the tin cans.  Soon the entire
village was copying Mihoshi, looking up in what they guessed was
either a religious vision or a new dance.  Either way, they
wanted in on it.

Heh

"HEY!  RYOKO!  AYEKA!  TENCHIIII!  DOWN HERE!  DOWN HERE!"
Mihoshi screamed, hopping up and down.

The villagers were delighted!  It _was_ a new song and
dance!  They joyfully took up the chant as well, screaming and
laughing and dancing around in their best imitation of the wild
gyrations the blonde outsider was performing.

Now they might get the cabbit's attention with that sort of ruckus.

The silent musicians soon got the feel of it, and took up
the beat again.  The rest of the villagers, after listening to
Mihoshi repeat herself, figured out the loud bits and mumbled
their way through the rest of it, in effect remixing Mihoshi's
chant.

"AIE!  RO-KO!  AIE-KA!  TENSHIIEE!  KOKO!  RO-KO!"

Hehehe.

GP uniforms were made out of a material Earth hadn't
invented, and hopefully Ryo-Ohki would be looking for something
like that.

She ran around the edges of the crowd, occasionally leaping
into the air in her enthusiasm.

Soon the rest of the tribe, conditioned to watching Mihoshi
for direction, was grabbing pieces of cloth from the huts and in
some cases the hammocks strung up here and there, adding their
own efforts to the screaming, flapping mob.

*Sigh* It's how things like this get started, you know. Next thing you know
it'll be a new dance craze throughout the continent.

High in the sky, Ryoko, Tenchi, and Ayeka all clustered
around the video screen, watching the commotion below.  Ryo-Ohki
had originally been attracted by the light and commotion,

repitition of 'commotion.' Might want to change one to 'disturbance' or the
like.

"Look at the natives!  Look at the natives!" Ayeka hissed
suddenly, as they all started mimicking Mihoshi again.

"They're acting like she does!"  Tenchi's voice was tinged
in horror.

Eh? So what? To an outsider it would appear obvious their trying to get
Tenchi and company's attention. Quite normal given the circumstances.

"It happens," she replied defensively.

"No!  We have to kill them all!  Sterilize the area!" Ryoko
insisted.

"Don't do it, Ryo-Ohki!  Mihoshi is a friend!"

Of course, it does lead to this amusing train of thought.

She would have glomped him, too, but for Ayeka's force
shield, which covered all three of them.

Heh. Wonder if she bounced off.

"Ouch."

Guess so. Might want to add a line about Mihoshi deflecting of it like a
basketball off a backboard or something.

"Um, Kiyone is off out there somewhere," Mihoshi said
nervously, waving in her partner's general direction.  "Don't
worry about her."  She just knew Kiyone was in a romantic clinch,
and didn't want her friend's private time interrupted.

How sweet.

"Out there?  You mean she's lost in the jungle?" Tenchi
asked, concerned.  "What happened?  Is she alright?"

Mihoshi was just about to reply when Ayeka interrupted her.

"Mihoshi, why are you naked?"  She paused.  "And why are
all these people naked as well?"

Mihoshi: It's damn hot and easier to deal with without clothing.

Kiyone turned her head sideways and put her hand behind her
ear, holding her long hair back to show them the place where her
earring used to be.  "When I say we lost our gear, I mean all of
our gear.  I think it ate my gun.  By the way, have any of you
ever seen or heard of a being with four arms, two legs, and a
nasty attitude?"

Yeah. It is still out there.

"That's fine, I suppose," Ayeka replied.  "But why don't
you come back with us?"  Her eyes flicked involuntarily to the
side where the huge dark-skinned man was standing and smiling at
them innocently.  Ryoko was smirking outright.

"Right now, I want a little time to myself."  Kiyone's hard
glare dared them to disagree.

Heh. Nice way to put it, though she won't really be by herself.

"Hot?" both Ryoko and Mihoshi asked before turning to look
at each other and shrugging.

Both used to warmer temperatures I guess.

They soon arrived at the village, drawing even more stares
and the odd hostile glance from the people who had wondered where
they had disappeared to the night before.  It had generally been
assumed that dealing with the newcomers could wait until after
the party, and then they had just grabbed the hot dancing mamma
and ran off.

Bastards.

There!  There it was!  A soft scrabbling above caught the
cabbit's attention.  Although completely concealed by the poles
and leaves that made up the roof, in the infrared she could make
out a small humanoid animal, clinging to the other side of a
nearby pole.  As she watched, it peeked cautiously around the
pole, quickly ducking back when it realized she was looking at
it.

Hmm. Interesting.

It backed up steadily and rose the volume and intensity of
its chattering with every step.  It clearly did not want to be
friends.  Then, for some reason, it stopped backing up and began
to advance.  The note of fear was gone from its voice, replaced
by an angry confidence that it could deal with this intruder.

Hmm. Interesting.

Ryo-Ohki halted instantly, suddenly very aware of the
presences now surrounding her.  The monkey's friends had arrived,
and they didn't sound like they wanted to be friends with her
either.

Oops.

Even Mihoshi noted her partner's new attitude in dismay.
Kiyone must have had a truly rough time in the jungle to be so
standoffish now.  She resolved to talk to her partner about it as
soon as they were alone.  Mihoshi couldn't help but feel that she
was somehow responsible, and one thing she couldn't stand was
having her partner mad at her.  It made her want to cry and beg
for forgiveness.

Heh. That could be amusing.

"Wait," Ayeka said suddenly.  "Where's Ryo-Ohki?"

"MIYAAAH!" screeched the cabbit, racing away from the
village with a dozen monkeys hot on her trail.

"She's ready to go, too," Ryoko assured her.

Heh

To tell the truth, as Mihoshi always did, she couldn't have
said what it was exactly that set the six-limbed alien apart from
the rest of the organic life in the area.  Some quirk of its
metabolism, perhaps, or a different composition of elements in
its cell walls.  Regardless, Yagami's tuned sensors quickly
picked out the alien's unique energy signature and displayed the
coordinates on screen.

Well, that was surprisingly easy.

"Mihoshi as well, perhaps," Ayeka suggested.  "If we three
await it on the ground and in the trees, we would have little
difficulty subduing it quietly once it tried for the door."

Sure they wil. Betcha it gets Yagami this time.

A riot stick turned out to be a sword length rod with a
prominent round guard and several strips running the length of
the 'blade'.  When a button was tapped and the handle was
squeezed lightly, as if being held in one hand, the blade could
be electrified like a tazer.  A dial controlled the power, which
could be set anywhere from a nasty shock to near-instant death
for anything not protected or immune.

Should probably go for max setting and hope it isn't immune.

Kiyone showed him how to use it, then set the dial for a
level that would stop just short of death for a human.  Just in
case he hit himself, as they didn't have the insulated armor
usually worn when wielding the riot sticks.

Okay. Good point.

"So, are we ready?" the dark haired woman asked.

Mute nods all around.

Seems off. 'There were mute...' might work better.

Mihoshi was the most active one, watching her screens as
the little white blip moved steadily closer, although much slower
than it had before.  "It's being very cautious," she informed
Kiyone.  "It's covered the first three thousand feet in a flash,
but it's skulking through the trees this last two.

It knows something's up.

Kiyone watched anxiously, listening carefully to Mihoshi's
reports as she did.  It was Ayeka that slowly stretched out one
slender hand and pointed, directing Kiyone's gaze to a large
white head emerging from a tangle of brush.  Her blaster leveled
out, tracking the beast's movements as it stepped into a gap in
the trees, boldly showing itself.

Interesting strategy on its part.

Kiyone's communicator shrieked with Mihoshi's voice even as
Ryoko called a warning out from above.

"Huh?" Ayeka said, immediately backpedaling and shielding
Kiyone as well.

They hit from the sides and back, three equally large
monsters running hell bent for blood, tearing through the trees
like guided cruise missiles.

Heh. It laid eggs and the youngsters grew quickly. Thought it was up to
something.

Claws of psychic power pried and tore at the shield,
flailing away furiously as the beasts growled.  With three of
them pushing with all their might, Ayeka didn't dare relax the
shield, and Kiyone could not get a shot.  In fact, Ayeka was a
little worried about keeping up the shield period, as it actually
gave a little under the combined push.

My, they are tough little buggers.

Just as quick she made herself insubstantial and dropped
into the ground, surprised to feel a brief tugging at her hair.
Not only were they as fast or faster than she could be, they
could even hit her when she was immaterial.

Wonder exactly what they are. Old  abadoned science project of Kagato's or
something.

The first alien had darted backwards on all six limbs when
the first one died, it's

its

Very close, actually.  Tenchi, caught up in the excitement
of the moment, had forgotten to close it.

Oops.

Enough electricity to knock out an elephant coursed through
its body, not fazing it in the slightest.

Figured as much.

It had been much smaller, and it didn't take a minute to get to
the airlock.  Her new blaster was out, ready, and pointed in
front of her as she ran, just as it had been when she first got
the sensor report that an intruder had made it aboard.

Bulkhead doors slammed closed behind her as she ran.  The
monster would make it no farther than it already had.

Smart girl.

The corridor had a slight curve to it, just enough that she
couldn't see the end where the alien was.

And unless it can sense her, it has the same disadvantage.

Her speed reached that of the creature's themselves

Thought there was only one creature. Should probably be singular.

 >

Sure enough, there it was standing to one side of the hall
in the lee of a corner, one hand gingerly clasped over a
particularly well-placed shot and the other three spread and
ready for action.  It had only backed up about twenty feet.

Yep. Preparing to retliate.

Luckily, she didn't have far to go before she exited the
ship.  Unluckily, it was just barely fast enough to throw all six
limbs out and sink its talons into the metal walls of airlock as
she attempted to fly through it.

Oops.

It let go all at once, allowing itself to be catapulted
back in mid-air, but also allowing it to slam two massive hands
on each side of Ryoko's head and two more on each shoulder.

The first blow was so strong that despite her natural
toughness, Ryoko was knocked instantly unconscious, and thus did
not feel it when it brought both feet up and kicked her viciously
in the stomach.

My. Tough little doggie.

"Did we get him?" she asked, sitting up and allowing Tenchi
to set her down on her feet as Ayeka and Kiyone ran up.

"I'm afraid not," Kiyone replied quickly.  "It got away.
We need to track it, fast."  "Mihoshi!"

Extras set of quotes there.

A few minutes later the Yagami had rose

'risen' I think

once again into the

sky, out of sight of anything on the ground as it ran a search
once again.

Two 'once again's close together. I'd change one of them.

"I've got a great idea!" Mihoshi said suddenly.  "Kiyone,
get us directly over the village, fast!"

Hmm. Methinks this will be a good plan.

Yagami was a higher class of ship than the average GP
cruiser, both in size and firepower, thanks to a few lucky breaks
and an out of court settlement on a sexual harassment suit Kiyone
had almost filed on one of the top brass.  She had then tried to
have her killed and had subsequently been arrested

Bit vague there. Sounds like it was a female officer that hit on Kiyone. If
that's the case, give the rank of the officer that hit on Kiyone to clear
things up. Like 'Captain' or something.

"So you see," Mihoshi explained to a perfectly horrified
Kiyone, "now we can go down, arrest the bad guy however it takes,
and not worry about native casualties."

Well, that is sort of one way to keep them safe.

Coincidently enough, Ryoko did exactly that twenty seconds
later, a six-limbed green and white alien space monster slung
over her shoulders like a sack of carrots.

That was quick.

Everyone screamed and jumped back, expecting it to suddenly
start swinging, but it was completely motionless with a certain
air of finality about it.

"Found it laying in the dirt at the edge of the village in
a puddle of clear stuff," Ryoko explained.  "Looks like Mihoshi's
shots did more damage than we thought."

Hmm. I wonder.

"Are you sure it's dead?" Kiyone asked warily.  "The last
thing we need is it suddenly coming back to life in _here_."

"Did you poke it with a stick?" inquired Mihoshi, ever
practical.  "My Grandfather said always poke them with a long
pointy stick, then shoot them again if they wiggle."

Yep. Good idea.

Kiyone nodded.  "Good point, Tenchi.  Mihoshi, see if you
can find any more.  I'll take this thing down to the freezer for
transport back to headquarters.  The sooner we find the rest, the
sooner we start convincing the natives that we're just a case of
bad beer."

And drop them off again.

Ryoko looked at the cluster of blips and groaned.  "Oh,
man...  I sure don't want to try to take on that many at once."

Ayeka nodded in agreement.  "Indeed, that would be quite
dangerous.  What will we do?"

"Nuke them from orbit. It's the only way to be sure."

And then, unbidden, images of big cats and monkeys sprang
to mind.  Swarms of blood-sucking insects, broad-leafed
succulents with stinging juices, huge trees, and thousands of
little crawling things that bit you in private places all warred
for position of the dominant irritant in her mind.  Crudely,
reminded of her little lice problem, Kiyone scratched her crotch.
Un unh, no.  This Galaxy Policewoman had just been pushed too
far.

Hehehehee. Very nice.

And Kiyone finally had call to voice a statement that had
been running through her mind since the first hour she'd been
lost in the jungle.  And, also in an unwitting parody, albeit a
little more different, of a certain large cartoon bear, she said,
"Bah...  FUCK the Environmentalists, Mihoshi."

I concur.

Unfortunately, while this huge missing chunk of the jungle
would later fascinate Earth scientists, now no one would ever
discover the cluster of little blue flowers at the base of a
towering jungle giant that contained the most remarkable chemical
compound that, if it had been synthesized and marketed, could
have finally cured cancer.

But hey, you can't make an omelet without breaking a few
eggs.

Ah well. Probably happens all the time.

First a few villagers stopped and stared, then the rest as
they gradually grew aware that their visitor from last night had
returned.

In a certain state of undress, no less.

Kiyone tapped her red earring with one finger.  "Very
FUNNY, Mihoshi, now beam down my clothes."

Heh

Breathing deeply to gather his courage, he bravely risked a
brain fry and possible metal control

'metal' or 'mental'?

Dretric jerked, surprised to find that her former gibberish
was now easily understood, accentless English.

English, or his native tongue? It would make more sense for it to translate
into his primary language.

"We had to pick you up for a moment because there was a
dangerous criminal in the area, heading for your village," Kiyone
continued unawares.  "In order to prevent any injuries, we
teleported you up while we subdued it.  Don't worry, we got him.
In fact, you can thank my partner for that, she may well have
save

saved

paranoids who were promptly beat down for the crime of being
different and having a different opinion.

Heh

Kiyone nodded, then suddenly something occurred to her.
"With your clothes ON!" she barked.

Heh

Kiyone nodded and chuckled.  "That's fine, you guys go on
back."

"Have fun, Kiyone!" Ryoko's voice encouraged.  "Yeah, lots
of fun, if you know what I mean.  Heh heh heh ouch!  What was
that for?"  Her voice cut off abruptly.

heh. nice touch

Kiyone gave Dretric a full force Look, demanding attention
and obedience.  "There are a few things I need to tell you.
First, you must never tell anyone else what has happened today.
You or the villagers."

"No problem!" he lied.  "They don't talk much to outsiders
anyway."  That, at least, was the honest truth.

Heh

"Second, you must continue to act just like you always did.
No graven images of the ship, no radical cultural changes, or
anything like that."

"Oookay..." he agreed, a little put off, idly scratching
himself.

Heheheh.

He looked down suddenly.  He'd been doing that a lot more
often lately.  Something tiny moved slightly, catching his eye.
He knew what that was.

"Aww, Christ.  And she gave me crabs, too."

Evil. Just plain evil.

OMAKE  OMAKE  OMAKE  OMAKE


Unfortunately, that wasn't all she gave him.  Three months
later, a mysterious sexually transmitted disease, harmless to
alien races but virilent in a human host, swept the tiny,
amaxingly promiscuous village, devouring each of the villagers
from within and sending them to their painful deaths.

Thought as much. ^_^

Alas, but not before Dretric left the village, returning to
Harvard with his numerous handwritten reports.  Thanks to a
number of friendly encounters in airport bars, several old
flings, and a stop at a New Amsterdam brothel, the disease found
itself spread over a wide range of prolific partners and in the
perfect position to sweep the planet.   Dretric infected over a
dozen people before he finally choked to death on his own fluids
in a New York hospital, and they, in turn, infected far more.

Amusing.

With so many people having been exposed, it soon spread to
the rest of the world, turning into a planetary epidemic that
doctors were powerless to stop.

All told, the disease eventually claimed over three million
people before mutating into a less harmful form that later caused
the extinction of the last remaining goldfinches.

WAAAA! Not the goldfinches.

But hey, these things happen far more often than you'd
think.

The moral of this story?

Use protection, especially when in Africa.

Agree.

Very nice work. Everything flowed well and the situation was amusing and
exciting at the same time. Nice to ses Kiyone and Mihoshi take center stage
for a change of pace. Not much more I can think of other than you're due for
another chapter now, since I finally got around to reviewing this one.

D.B. Sommer




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