Ryoko wrote:

yes I know it's about a year late, don't hassle me! more as soon as I
finish it... I keep geeting side tracked writing unpublishable
spamfics...<sighs>

    You know, I rather like this fic... Good to see more of it!

here it is! (previous parts on patchmonkeys site
http://patchmonkey.net I think.)
**********************************************************************
***************
<email to ryoko@otaku.freeserve.co.uk>

What has come before...

 Death comes to us all. Unfortunately, due to the 'Nerima effect' she
made a mistake, and failed to claim a certain aqua-transsexual's soul
upon his, or rather confusingly for the hapless collector of souls,
HER demise... Ranma now had to figure out what that means, avoid
becoming engaged to Nabiki, and survive Ukyo's reaction when she wakes
up. To further add to poor boy/girl's misery, Desire is STILL trying
to hook him/her up with its elder sister. In an attempt to re-open a
farcical engagement it prompted Genma to make as a child, Desire has
given Kho-Lohn, Matriarch of the Joketsuzoku, and long time ... you'll
find out eventually...  a method to re-open Xian-Pu's claim, thus
reopening Telute's.

 This is going to go down like a bowling ball through fresh custard.
Badly, explode messily and make stains that're impossible to get out
of your clothes. You can just tell...

    Hehe!

 All this, plus the creation of Jusenkyo, the revelation of just why
most of the Ranma cast is insanely powerful, or at least insane,
although quite possibly not in this part, and a emerging demi-divinity
with designs on its old boss Destruction's job. (well... I may get
some of these in .. ^^:)

    Oooh!

 And the story is still only into it's third day....!

    Not neccessarily a bad thing.

PS: Anyone who doesn't like seeing Akane's nightmares... or blood...
had better skip the first few pages.

For the anti Akane league  : Sadly not all the blood is hers.

For the Akane worshippers  : Sadly some of it is.

For the demon worshippers : There's lots of blood.

    That was... enlightening.

***************************************************************


Effexor entertainment presents
A Prozac production

Ranma: Endless Complications

Written and directed by
 Someone who can't think of a witty tag here.

Ranma 1/2 and Sandman are copyrighted to their respective creators

    Ranma 1/2 was created by Rumiko Takahashi, and is published by Viz in the US.

    Neil Gaiman created Sandman, and it was published by CD Comics/Vertigo.

 A youngish man looked out over his domain, his skeries, his islets of
peace in his chaotic realm, the numberless souls that rested in his
demesne, and frowned. His skin was alabaster white, his eyes pools of
darkness that drank the light and reflected nothing but a wisdom and
power beyond mortal ken. His hair was as pale as his flesh, yet his
face was as unlined as a babes. In short, he was Dream of the Endless,
and he was worried.

    Ah. The new Morpheus. Well, I thought the older one was cooler.

 "Something is out of place..."
 "My lord?" An previously unobtrusive man appeared at the side of his
master in the fashion that generations of butlers had attempted to
perfect over the course of centuries, and never achieved. The man was
tall, gangly, gingerhaired with a face that could break into a
welcoming smile that could reassure the most nervous, or fall into
worry sufficient to scare the most bold. Ears with points surmounted
either side of his long faced head, and on that face a look of slight
confusion held sway.
 "Lucien, it... I do not know what it is, all I know is that it is out
of place. My predecessor would have known, yet I cannot ... Of
course," finished Dream, his face snapping up as his assumed memories
finally placed the disturbing sensation. "Come with me Lucien, there
is a place we must go, I have to be sure of this." Lucien boggled
mildly, quite confused by the attitude of his lord. Of course he knew
that this was a new master, it was just that there was so much of the
old Morpheus in this new Dream that the additions and quirks seemed to
stand out more brilliantly.[1]

    Quick note about the formatting here:

    You might want to consider adding a space between paragraphs, for legibility. As it is, the formatting is tight, and my old and ailing eyes have trouble seeing where one paragraph ends, and the next begins.

 "Of course my lord, but... wouldn't Matthew be more appropriate? As a
rule I do tend to accompany you on internal journeys and he the
external..."

    Eh? I thought that Matthew followed him pretty much everywhere, unless ordered elsewhere.

 "Of course. My apologies. If you could have him sent to me on the
outskirts of the dreaming I would be grateful."
 "Of course my lord," smiled the gangly librarian, "I shall do that at
once... will you require anything else once you have visited this
dreamer?"

    librarian, "I -- librarian. "I  (?)

 "If you could arrange for a light lunch I would be grateful."
 "Of course my lord. I shall go and call for Matthew..."

 With that Lucien retreated to the shadows, his slightly stiff-legged
walk as ever making him look like a marionette, the grace and speed of
his motion like a ballerina. As Dream watched his companion take his
ever-present barrow of books with him he mused on the nature of those
who would give their service to him. Then without any fanfare he faded
into the air, tracking the disturbance that plagued him.

    Ack. Hm. Perhaps a pair of commas to set off 'as ever'?

 In her bedroom Akane finally regained the control of her body. Eyes
dry from her sightless vigil over the Tokyo skyline, muscles cramped
from her unmoving position, she retreated to her bed, pulled her duvet
over her, and then, still fully clothed, she slept.

    Commage.

 As she lay there dreaming a haze of unwelcome memory crept in, and
again and again she repeated the words of Teleute and the biter
denunciations of the Saotome Matriarch, a cruel litany of her sins and
follies that she could not escape, and perversely did not wish to.

    biter -- bitter (slight difference, there...;) )

 He deserved it! Hadn't he? Teleute's words bit deep, her words
accusing her with their lack of venom than any ammount of vitriol
could have.

    ammount -- amount

 Nodoka's were worse. The cold rage filled look at her sons betrayer.
Ranma had loved her in his own clumsy way, had saved her life, gone
out of his way to defend her, sacrificed cures, pride, self-respect
to stay with her, and her only reaction had been to treat him like low
grade garbage, a mannequin to abuse, assault and scorn.

    sons betrayer. -- son's betrayer.

 "Why shouldn't I you uncute tomboy, I mean look at you - yer thigh's
are too thick, you've got no grace, ya can't cook,  ya macho chick...
Not like Shampoo here... " The dream Ranma paused to glomp back onto
the delighted amazon, initiating a deep and passionate kiss that
curled the girls toes. Releasing her, he spun back towards Akane,
morphing swiftly into his female form, who posed with a sultry look
across at a stunned Akane.

    shouldn't I you -- shouldn't I, you (?)
    cook,  ya macho -- cook, ya macho (extra space)
    girls toes. -- girl's toes.
    across at a (?) Sounds a little awkward.

 "Besides... I'm a much better girl than you are," she continued with
a sultry laugh, deliberately turning her back on Akane, and walking
away with a graceful sway that would have challenged any male. Coming
up from the sides, Ukyo flung herself at the redhead, while Kodachi
poured hot water on Ranma-chan, restoring Akane's protector... who
wrapped an arm apiece across her rivals significant female assets, and
walked into the distance.

    Repetition of sultry from the last paragraph. Probably just me being nitpicky. Remember, you can ignore me freely. ;)

 Akane shrieked in rage, betrayal, bestial hatred, pulled forth a
weapon from somewhere, and sprinted at the undefended Ranma's back.
Swinging she saw the sharp steel blade of a katana split Ranma cleanly
in twain, gore splashing across herself, streamers of intestines
leaping forth from the corpse to entangle her footing, wrap around her
arms, vital organs falling to the ground in time to create a stinking
and slimy mat for her face as she lost her balance and fell forwards.

    Swinging she -- Swinging, she (?)

    Hm. Is Dream mad at her?

 Looking around her in horror, Akane saw the blade she had so blithely
assumed to be a bokken, or a comically oversized mallet, dissolve as
if Ranma's blood were an acid of some unknowably potent type. Moments
later she felt her face sizzle and crack as her flesh retreated from
her bones, leaving her once attractive face branded with her own
personal  mark of Cain. The blood of an innocent shed for no reason
save the killer's own petty jealousies.

    personal  mark -- personal mark

    Which makes me wonder... Abel might actually get along with Ranma.

 "I didn't mean it... I didn't mean it!" She shrieked through her half
face. Ahead of her Kodachi, spotless in her most formal clothing,
unmarred by the blood, free from her insanity looked down at her with
an expression of contempt and disdain.

    her Kodachi -- her, Kodachi (Unless she's refering to a weapon, in which case it should be 'kodachi'.)

 "You broke your toys again. You never meant to break them, but you
would always smash them, little girl..." With that, the Black Rose
stepped away, Ukyo, beautiful, feminine, in a dress, yet still
carrying her ever present bakers peel and bandoleer of mini-spatulas
lifted Akane from the gore on the floor, carrying her nerveless figure
in front of her.

    bakers -- baker's

    That is a lot of sentence.

    'her' in 'her nerveless figure' sounds a little odd, since there's a lot of 'hers' in this segment...

 "You are spoiled. You killed Ranchan once, you wanted to kill him
again. You are a killer. You should never have stood in our way... You
just weren't good enough for him..." Ukyo passed her burden to a third
figure who stepped forth from the shadows, next to tilted object that
Ukyo leant her against. Akane moaned in dispair at the mature woman
standing over her, contempt and disdain shining from eyes that had
once blazed with love. Ignoring the weeping of her youngest daughter,
Akane's mother bound her tightly to the cross, the coarse ropes
cutting harshly into the softer skin of the undersides of her arms,
the sides of her legs, her eyes never once regarding her as anything
more than a piece of garbage to be disposed of. Akane felt fresh shame
as she was crucified like a common murderer, a death designed for
those who were without honour or ancestry

    I don't seem to remember the cross being introduced...

 "I don't know you. My daughter would  not judge without the facts. My
daughter would know forgiveness. Mercy. Compassion. Temperance. You
have none of these."

    would  not -- would not (extra space)

 Akane wept tears of blood, unable to speak through this agony of
repudiation. *Mother* she wept silently, *Don't leave me mommy!
Please! I'll be good - it won't happen again!* She felt motion, as
Shampoo and Cologne pulled on ropes, lifting the enormous cross into
position.

    me mommy -- me, mommy (I think, and should that be capitalized?)

 "Pervert girl come to bad end."

    Ukyou: A very bitter end...

 "Shampoo will study Great-grandmother."

    Cologne: I'm flattered. But study the events, not me.

    study Great-grandmother -- study, Great-grandmother

 Mouse came forth to repudiate her by his presence, words failing him
as he stared at the bisected corpse at his feet. He looked at Akane
who winced as best she could under the look of amazed disgust. Beside
her and below, Ryoga unpacked his backpack.

    Mouse -- Mousse   One's a rodent, one's a styling/hair thing (I think).

 "You know," he began conversationally, "I never liked him, but none
of us would have done what you did. Mousse never wanted Ranma dead,
just out of the way, I wanted to make him feel the hell he made my
life. The *other* girls loved him," here Ryoga smirked up at the bound
prisoner with a nasty smirk. "Still I expect that would be something
that someone like you couldn't understand. You only know how to hurt
people. Do you now what makes it funny though?" mused Ryoga in dark
amusement, becoming more demonic in aspect, his skin changing from a
travel worn tan to a deeper smoke-stained hue, his fangs becoming more
prominent.

    Repetition of 'smirk'.
    Still I -- Still, I (?)

 Ryouga's change complete a full fledged oni dressed in the rude smock
of an Eta[2] stood in front of the captive girl who could only squirm
and weep as the truth of Ryoga's words bit more trenchantly that the
ropes that encircled her limbs. Bitter tears fell from her single eye
as she flagellated herself mercilessly for not knowing of Ranma's love
when it still mattered, not taking the time she had to be with him,
for her unjust and undeserved mistrust.

    Be advised, the literal translation of 'Eta' is 'much filth', as opposed to 'burakumin' which I seem to remember equating to 'people of the hamlet'. In otherwords, the term is derogatory, and I'm not sure you knew that before.

 The demonic Hibiki rippled like a reflection in a pond, and
disappeared. Akane looked up with a sudden wild surge of hope that it
had all been a mistake. The sight that greeted her was not one to
inspire confidence. Ranma stood there, his two sides sliding up and
down each other, with a gory line straight down his centre, brief
glances of biology best left hidden, and a look of tender love on one
side, betrayal and loathing on the other. With a simple leg sweep the
cross was shattered, falling backwards where it dissolved to dust,
freeing Akane from her entrapment.

    Noi je'tat! The imagery is inspired, to say the very least.

 "I'm Sorry Akane... I love you, and I forgive you..."

    Sorry Akane -- sorry, Akane

 Akane screamed and flung the covers back from herself, covered in
cold sweat. In the doorway, Ranma, miraculously whole looked at her
with compassionate worry in his eyes, before walking over and sitting
on edge of the bed. Akane flung herself into his lap, holding tightly
to him while she sobbed incoherently and wildly.

    whole looked -- whole, looked (?)

 "Her? Recover? That uncute tomboy actually needing someone... That'll
be the day! huh.."

    huh.. -- Huh... (?)

 "Maybe..." Muttered Ranma. Kasumi was just able to catch a brief
flash of sadness and pain across Ranma's face before he locked it
inside his mask of good natured pride. Kasumi was sure that he was
only showing that much because he trusted her, and even then couldn't
bring himself to open totally... Ranma turned to leave. "...But now
mom's gotten involved... it's gonna be a big mess Kasumi. A biiiig
mess..." Sighing Ranma levered himself to his feet, and walked out of
Akane's room. Behind him Kasumi looked at her sleeping sister with a
look of pain, unable to see a way to mend the fences between Ranma and
her sibling. Seating herself by her sister, she traced a finger along
the edge of Akane's face, peeling thin black strands of hair away from
her sweat stained face.

    Muttered -- muttered
    mom's -- Mom's (used as a proper name)
    Sighing Ranma -- Sighing, Ranma
    Repetition of 'face'.

 By a small pool a group of actors washed their faces, removing their
clothes and swapping them for the overalls of their daily lives before
arranging themselves ready to go to work on striking their set ready
for their next performance. Around the small space a pair of what
seemed to be young men split themselves from each other, wiping the
remnants of the theatrical blood from their heads, nearby another
youth removed a pair of oversized fangs from his mouth, working his
jaw in pleasure at having the damn things out. Above this all,
silhouetted against the light two figures watched, one with a rounded
bulbous head, the other apparently hunchbacked... until they walked
closer to the light and revealed themselves to be Jack Pumpkinhead,
the lord of this realm,  his raven companion perched on his shoulder.

    realm,  his -- realm, his (Extra space)

 "You gotta admit, that was one doozy of a dream boss," mused the
pumpkinhead puffing thoughtfully on the butt of one of his handrolled
cigarettes, smoke curling gently through his eyes. "One heck of a
nightmare, bet the Corinthian's gonna be pissed he missed out on this
one..." Sighing, the scarecrow like man strode down into the set of
the latest successfully completed nightmare and started barking orders
to the faceless spirits who helped set up these custom order dreams.
Distantly, the two on the lip of the small perfomance space heard the
foreman of the dreaming muttering to himself. "Poor kid, wonder just
what the heck she's punishing herself for?...Shouldn't happen to a
dog..."

    dream boss -- dream, Boss
    Ugh. Involving the Corinthian woulda been far too much for me.
    scarecrow like -- scarecrow-like

    Which reminds me of one of my favorite scenes from Sandman:

    When Jack is confronting the Furies, and he says, "I'm your worst nightmare! A pumpkin with a gun!"

 Dream allowed nothing to pass across his face as he listened to his
servant grumbling before setting down to work, giving one last look
around the small amphitheatre space. Apparently satisfied with what he
had seen, he nodded softly, perhaps even approvingly to himself, and
beginning to walk towards the centre of the dreaming to reflect on
what this particular mortal's dream meant. Behind him somebody
muttered something vile as the cross snapped at the base and clonked
her in the head.

    Commage.

 "So are you going to tell me what this was all about now boss?"
croaked Matthew, readjusting his feet for better traction on his
masters moving shoulder.

    now boss -- now, Boss (?)

 "It is... difficult to explain. Suffice it to say that what happened
here must happen. And must happen to others. Of this no more can I
say, but you may wish to talk to the brothers, but do not be surprised
if they do not know of it, this is more secret than the end of
history, more mysterious than life."

    Two 'but's in the same sentence. A little awkward.

 "Gee, that's what I love about you boss, always ready with the
straight answer," replied Matthew, maintaining a straight face as only
a raven could. "Is there anything you can tell me about what's going
on? Last time you started getting this mysterious your predecessor
went for a walk with his sister..."

    you boss -- you, boss

 "I thank you for your concern Matthew, but you may rest assured that
I am in no danger of passing on. That honour rests with my older
brother. What we see here is merely preparation for that event..."
With that the Dream Lord faded into the mists that separated one area
of the dreaming from another leaving a rather startled bird flapping
his wings desperately in order to avoid landing on his butt.

    concern Matthew -- concern, Matthew

 'It's not his bloody brother *again?* Oh lor, last time the boss took
it into his head to go after Destruction he damn nearly got the
dreaming destroyed!' thought Matthew in a total tizzy. A second
thought struck. 'It's Destruction's turn to die?! this is NOT good...'
Spiralling up into the mists Matthew began winging his way to Eve at
his best possible pace. He needed someone to talk this over with and
Able was currently dead, and likely to stay that way till the middle
of next week.

    lor,  -- lor', (?)

 'But why her? What akes hr so important the boss would come down to
see her?' thought the ex-human in puzzlement as he flapped his way
into the mists...

    akes hr -- makes her (?)

 Ukyo woke up with her usual lack of enthusiasm. Despite being bath a
world class cook and martial artist, she was a teenager, and a
reluctance to rise from the warm confines of bed was part of the
package. Gently cracking several stiff joints, she sat up, puzzled to
find herself in Ranma's bedroom. Sadly, she concluded, since she was
still fully dressed she hadn't managed to nail her Ranchan. A few
seconds later the thought occurred that if she hadn't been sleeping
with Ranma, then what the hell was she doing in his bed.

    bath -- both
    Commage.
    Should the last sentence be a question?

    Hehehe!

 "You aren't going to marry her!" demanded Ukyou forcefully, "tell me
you aren't!"

    forcefully, "tell me -- forcefully. "Tell me

 "Erm, no, why would I?" Asked a baffled Ranma.

    Asked -- asked

 "You're mine! You're supposed to marry me Ranchan, not some Jonny
come lately!"

    me Ranchan -- me, Ranchan (?)

 "Because it's the truth - now I can do what I want without having to
worry about the damn family honour, or getting Shampoo into trouble
with the ol' ghoul, or Akane into trouble with her folks, or even get
me into trouble with mom. Look, you're my best friend, yes?"

    mom -- Mom

 "Thanks... look, you never pushed me into anything, you were always
there for me as a kid, it was the one thing that I did for myself, and
even then pops managed to stick his oar in..." She murmured bitterly
before picking up her thought. "But now we're back together right?"

    pops -- Pops (?)

 "Look at it this way, now we don't have to worry about the damn
engagement you can just be a friend, or I can finally find out who I
really like without the pressure. Look Shampoo is of the running, and
I have no intention of Marryin' Teluete or Nabiki, so it's just a
chance to have some space to myself, d' you see?"

    Commage.

    Marryin' -- marryin

 Ukyo evidently didn't. "So you're saying that without the engagement
it's al over, and you don't have to worry about me anymore?" She said
dejectedly, tears forming in the corners of her eyes.

    al -- all

 It has often been said that Death walks among us, and this is broadly
true. Not that often, and not for long, but Teleute was fond of her
annual vacation from her job. Currently though she was walking the
earth in slightly more than her usual job-mandated quantities, even
going so far as to have spent the night at a friends.

    earth -- Earth (?)

 Her job might have seemed simple, find a dying person, free them from
their mortal shell, deposit them wherever they were supposed to go
next. A rather specialised form of stewardessing, lightened only by
the fact that there were more than a few deities, demons and
otherworldly beings of power who had set up centralised collection
points for the recently corpsed, or simply collected what she freed...
Valkyries, Angels, that annoying Deadman, the list went on.

    Hehe!

 But it was still her job, and she was the only one who COULD do it,
the only one who DID do it. She was in fact still doing it, but simply
being on the mortal plane for this length of time was starting to make
her slightly embarrassed, and giving her that awful feeling you have
right when you realise that there's no way you can hide the fact that
you've been goofing off before the boss arrives. Rather silly
considering that in the end even the gods would come to her, and that
she was part of the basic structure of the universe, entropy given
form, but the feeling remained.

    Heh. I always felt that Dream bowing to the angels was a concession Gaiman didn't want to make.

 So Teleute, as she preferred to be known as, went for a walk to clear
her head. Possibly a change of location would clear the jitters out of
her skull, and then she could get down to a touch of relaxing. It
wasn't as though she hadn't walked the earth before, but then she had
been in the company of her brother, or running errands that had to be
performed. But she'd never taken a holiday of her own volition, and
like a five year old child playing with a forbidden toy, she got the
collywobbles when she thought about what she was supposed to be doing.

    earth -- Earth

 Technically he could do it now, but this would be nicely dramatic,
and he was in a good mood. His good mood increased as another gremlin
flashed across his vision, desperately trying to flee from him.

    Okay, this is wonderful stuff. 'Genocide'. Heh.

    Destruction will be annoyed, to be sure, but what will Death think?

 "Come ON!" he called to the sky in exasperation, "Isn't anyone around
here going to put up a fight?!" the wind answered his call. Sighing,
Genocide wiped his hands clean on a nearby wall, taking some comfort
in the knowledge that as with all things in this realm he had
committed an act of symbolism, symbolically mastering the gremlin
through the traditional method - blood. The unfortunate creatures
death brought more of the functions of the realm under his sway, so it
hadn't been a wasted effort.

    creatures -- creature's

 Shampoo was at heart a very simple creature. Despite her myriad
complexities, despite her supposed deviousness, there were really very
few truths abou her that you needed to know to truely understand her.
the first was that when she loved, she gave all of herself, nothing
held back, EVERYTHING. The second was that she was utterly devoted to
her tribe. The laws weren't the greatest, and since moving to Japan,
if she'd been of a less straightforward turn of mind she may even have
started to quetstion her life in Joketsuzoku, but her very devotion to
that tribe blinded her to it's follies - must kill girl Ranma marry
boy Ranma? The laws were paradox. So she ignored them and concentrated
on the other onstant. That she would do whatever it took to acheive
her aims.

    the first -- The first

 She loved Ranma, her laws statd that him beating her meant they were
married. She was not going to let anyone stand in her way. She would
mary her airen! Nearby she heard Ranma give a muffled sneeze and
smiled, leaping high into the air, raising her bonbori high to start
the fight, one she knew she had no hope of winning, Ranma was simply
to damned good to beat without drugging him, breaking all of his limbs
and tying him to the floor.

    statd -- stated

 "RANMA I KILL!" A little storng perhaps, but it was more or less the
effect she'd been aiming for...

    RANMA I-- RANMA, I (?)
    storng -- strong

 Looking into the sky Ranma sighed and swore very gently even as he
leapt aside, a startled Ucchan in his arms.

    Ucchan -- Ukyou (?)

 Death= next universe's destiny because you have to have an observer
there from the beginning, and if destiny dies at the end of the
universe then death is the one who must observe the new universe
begin? hmm... where to put this...

    ...

    Well, in the story, I'd imagine. ;) I'd imagine Destiny knows he will perish, and what will come of it, if it's intended.

    Likely it's all taken care of in the Book.

[1] "Of course, one of those things that no one can explain is that
Daniel has been
Dream from the beginning of time, and always was Dream, and there was
no other
Dream...but there was another Dream, and Daniel took his place when he
died..."

    Cosmic loophole. Dying is a game to the Endless.

Also note that in the comics continuity currently both Lucien and
Matthew are dead. However since I don't get 'the dreaming' due to
total poverty they get a reprieve.<heh>

    Same with me and the Tenchi! manga.

[2] Eta, the lowest social class in feudal japan. Eta were the people
who killed animals, buried the dead,  dealt with prisoners, did the
day to day work below the dignity of the peasants etc. Also note that
crucifixion was almost never used for a samurai unless they had lost
their status, having been stripped of their rank by their lord (the
head of the family or the person they were pledged to support). It was
also possible to lose your status by being on the losing side of a
fight, but for those made Ronin, it was possible to redeem themselves
and become samurai again.

    I don't know that Ronin could reclaim their honor. I'm pretty sure that they couldn't.

I think.

    Ditto. :p

Either way it's one of the most degrading things you could do to a
samurai, and the Tendo's are a samurai family

    Tendo's -- Tendos

Anyways. Finally apologies for letting this drag on so long. I meant
to relase this part ... er... february I think. Anyway. had some
problems with th eUkyo scene. Still not happy, but Narse suggested the
Shampoo turning up part, and I have a way forwards again! Expect to
see more of this before march! ^_^

    E-Ukyou! For all your online Ranma 1/2 needs! ;)

    Carry on the good work -- I like this story.