Hey!
Just wanted to drop a quick note saying I enjoyed the fic... not sure if
I've commented on the series before, so I thought I would now. Uh...
except, being utter shit at C&C, I don't have much to offer other than,
well, that I liked it.
Cool fight scene, a couple of things, though:
Now, the impression I got is that the Ravener King is pretty damn powerful,
right, which is why Vampires are needed for killing it and its minions.
Then Ranma wanders in there and, effectively, beats the crap out of it.
Admitedly, he gets beat up in the process, but if it wasn't for the
interference of the (incredibly dumb) reporter, he could've probably pull
off a victory. Now, I'm all for, 'yay, Ranma,' but it seems to undermine a
lot of what the sisters, especially Akane, gave up. Unless that's your
intent, of course: Akane became a vampire because she thought she had to,
and Ranma's showing her that she took the easy way to power and strength (as
opposed to training and sacrifice.)
During the fight, some of the descriptions seem a bit sparse. Obviously,
fight scenes oughta be quick-moving, and unnecessary descriptive prose will
just slow it down, but it seems like Ranma picks up all kinds of weaponry
without the reader ever being made aware that it's around (other than the
fact that he's in a warehouse.) I mean, how many crowbars and i-beams and
whatnot does he chuck at the baddy? And wouldn't the Hiryu Shoten Ha rip
the roof off of the building, seeing as the damn thing seems to reach
something like a kilometer up (well, maybe not, but it sure -looks- big.)
Last thing: the reporter. Now, dumb-ass reporters have often played
(deservingly) the role of cannon-fodder, but, I mean, really, running up to
a regenerating, monsterous supposed serial-killer, and asking, 'so, are you
the killer?' seems like a really bad idea? I could see asking Ranma, are
you fighting the supposed Nerima serial killer?, however, and still getting
stuck in the cross-fire.
Well, criticsm aside, enjoyed the chapter; fast-moving, fun stuff. And,
hey, Ranma gets to be hero of the day! Although having your name known by a
horde of bloodthirsty monsters could be a bad thing....
Later
Mike
noakes_m@hotmail.com
http://www.geocities.com/noakes_m
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