"Kevin D. Hammel" <kevinsff@pacbell.net> wrote:
]] BTW, Any comments are my thoughts. Your story is fine the way
]] it is. In fact it is your best, IMHO.
I don't think I'd agree that it's my best, but I'm glad you liked it.
]] I will admit to having read (or at least scanning) the story
]] before I started this. One thing I find profoundly troubling.
]] WHY didn't Ranma let Akane in on who and what 'P-chan' was?
]] There would be no need to let 'P-chan' know, of course.
Because he's not sure how she'd react to the fact that he'd been
sleeping with her under false pretenses. Okay, maybe given the
circumstances she'd forgive him, but he's not confident enough of that
to try it.
"Ranma's curse has... evolved?" I said, wondering what more
there was that she hadn't told us yet.
]] I will refrain from a Pokemon joke.
Good, 'cause I'd have to go George Carlin on you for using "evolve" when
you mean "metamorphosized." :)
Turning, he looked her directly in the eyes. "His."
]] She is mistaken to think it Ranma's. The battle is CLEARLY
]] to Ranma's advantage, but not the tribe's.
It's not really a matter of whether there'd be advantage in winning --
rather that sometimes fighting has no advantage because winning isn't
likely enough to make it worthwhile.
A silence fell over the room. This wasn't the first time Ranma
had faced the possibility of being stuck permanently as a woman; but
there had always been a cure, if not within reach, at least in sight.
]] It can be argued that the Kaisuifuu was not TECHNICALLY in sight,
]] at least until the end of the story arc.
Not literally, no, but he knew of its existence at least and had a rough
idea of where to look for it.
"My pop is a complete idiot."
]] It took Thirty-eight manga volumes and for Ranma to
]] realize that?! :)
Hey, it's the sort of thing you can keep discovering over and over. ^_^
"Check this out." He handed me a piece of paper. The picture on
it showed a man in full scuba gear, complete with cyclopean mask and
duck-like flippers.
I handed it back. "Where'd you get it?"
"From Nabiki.
]] I STILL wonder if she showed this to Ranma just to see if he
]] would actually go out and get one.
Good question. :)
"That's all right, dear. Now we need to decide what to do about
Ranma, don't we."
]] I hope I don't make a fool of myself by asking if this is a
]] question?
Sort of. The kind that's meant to only have one answer. :)
"What would you suggest, Mrs. Saotome?" Maybe she would be able
to help. As the old saying went, with age comes wisdom, or at least if
you didn't end up as an underwear-stealing pervert.
"It is the gods' will, evidently, that Ranma, at least for the
present, is to be a woman. So, he should learn how to be a woman."
]] Sorry, I may get reamed over this, but this rubs me the wrong way.
]] Don't forget all Nodoka's tests of manhood, etc. And how she
]] said how manly Ranma was, while unconscious in cursed form, in the
]] manga. I think she wouldn't behave this way, but you are the
]] author.
Point noted. When I thought about this, I regarded this kind of reaction
from Nodoka as an unlikely but possible reaction for her. But it led to
a more interesting reaction from Akane than the alternative, so I
decided to go with the possible over the probable. Enough people have
objected to it that I'll need to re-read Noddy's appearances in the
manga and possibly reconsider this.
"He's run off. He may be trapped in his cursed form too, for all
we know." Actually, I hadn't thought about it before then. But Mr.
Saotome had at least half the same genes as Ranma, so it stood to reason
that he'd be susceptible as well. I hoped he'd be all right.
]] This is incredibly magnanimous, since he is the ultimate
]] architect of their woe.
Maybe, but only through stupidity, not maliciousness, and he's suffering
for it as much as anyone else if not more.
"Well? How's it look?"
]] Presumably Akane got some fashion tips for Ukyo...
Or from her, yeah.
He examined himself in the mirror. "I suppose I could pass for
myself if the person really didn't know me that well. At least the curse
doesn't change my hair color or something stupid like that."
]] The obligatory swipe at the evil non-manga faction.
:-P
Eventually, we finally worked up the courage to explore each
other by touch. We bumbled around blindly, learning by trial and error,
and one thing led to another. I learned to look past the deceptions of
sight and feel and see Ranma as the man he really was -- as he'd always
been -- and make love to my husband.
]] Thanks for sparing us the details. You said what had to be said,
]] and no more.
Yeah, I could have showed more, but that would take this fic away from
what it's really about.
]] And the riddle that is Kasumi remains unanswered. Did brilliant
]] Kasumi set this up, then put on her act? OR did blissfully unaware
]] Kasumi forget the cookies by accident and call to have Akane
]] deliver them?
Yes. :) (To the overall question. ^_^)
]] Ranma has Akane to honor his manhood. But Ryouga becomes the
]] family dog. He has a human mind, where is the mental
]] stimulation? Something to read, perhaps? This could be as simple
]] as Ranma always using new magazines to line his... uh... pigbox
]] or whatever. It could be as elaborate as a mini TV set with a
]] remote. And to be honest, I feel Ranma WOULD buy one. But that
]] would profoundly alter the story. Any, it really hurts to see
]] a human being treated like an animal. A pampered and love pet no
]] doubt, but an animal.
]] I appreciate the inspiration for the piece being a beloved pet,
]] but I DO feel Ranma would do even more than he does.
You do raise a very interesting point, one that I hadn't thought about.
Ranma *is* doing to Ryoga exactly what he wouldn't let people do to him
-- let the curse take away his chosen role in life. But while this is
troubling, I'm not sure it's wrong for Ranma. He *is* often the type to
have one standard for himself and a different one for others. Besides,
it's more difficult for Ryoga, given the much greater physical
difference between his forms. Also, given the POV restriction in this
fic, there may have been things going on in the background that we don't
know about.
I finally find map that tell where to find
zuihouniquan!!! You not believe where it say go look: in Japan!
Not only is Japan, is place only twenty kilometers out of Tokyo!
I no know if map is correct, maybe out of date, maybe false. But
I hope it tell truth. You go follow map, Ranma, and I hope you
find cure. Zaijian,
Shampoo
]] WOW! Pronouns!!!
I don't write Shamp-speak quite as pidgin as the Viz people do. I work
with a big group of Chinese, and tend to model her speech after theirs.
None of them use their names when referring to themselves. :)
]] Why doesn't Akane wonder WHY Ranma asks like this. He HATED
]] P-chan before, why not now?
Well, there's a lot of years between then and now. Though I admit I
really didn't get to show the development of their relationship nearly
as well as I'd have liked to.
]] Is 'Freezerware' a proper name/brand name?
Yes, albeit a made-up one for this story.
]] Thanks. I said my piece...
Thanks for the comments. As I said, you brought up some very interesting
issues to consider.
Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics.html