Please see the note after the prologue
******
Prologue
The airport was crowded, so it wasn't much of a surprise that the two
passengers standing in the middle of the bustling waiting area were hard to
miss.
They were both male, really no more then boys. One was maybe fifteen,
short, slim, with dark hair that seemed to be on the edge of open rebellion
against good grooming. He wore a dark suit that was clean and well-tailored,
but somehow looked disused. A pair of small spectacles perched on the end of
his nose. Despite the walking cane he carried, he didn't look weak or infirm.
If someone had taken a close look at the boy's expression, they would have
noticed a look of quiet completion that was out of place on such a young boy.
On a Zen master, the expression would have been expected, but this boy didn't
appear to be a Zen Master.
The other passenger was slightly smaller and shorter then the first. He
looked younger then his travel companion, but was actually four years older.
His dark hair was cut short and tight, making him look like a US Marine
wannabe. He was dressed in a baggy suit that made him look younger then he
was. His expression was a mix of eagerness, fear, and anticipation. He kept
glancing around, looking for something or someone. he said in a breathless
rush, <Do you think Uncle forgot about us?>
said the first boy with
confidence. "Remember, he's the one that gathers the mail and sorts through
it.> He frowned, the said with some sarcasm. <After all, my siblings wouldn't
stoop to such a 'menial task'.>
They spoke to each other in English, even though they both spoke
Japanese fluently. They had spent most of the last five years in America
speaking English, lapsing into the second language only when they wished to
discuss things privately with other people present. They had now reverse this
habit, speaking English when they wanted to keep the conversation between
themselves..
replied the second boy, but continued to glance around.
<Could you please relax, Shingi? Your Uncle will he here.>
Just then, a small figure appeared before them out of the milling crowds
like magic. He wasn't much taller then the two boys, but no one would
mistaken
him for a youth. "Master Kaitou," he said to the first boy politely.
"Uncle Sasuke!' cried Shingi happily, switching back to Japanese.
The old man smiled at his nephew. "It's good to see you again, Shingi.
Your mother just sent me a batch of her chocolate-chip cookies. We will talk
later." he looked at the first boy. "Was your journey pleasant, Master
Kaitou?"
"Could have been worse," replied Kaitou with a half smile. "I think we
picked up a headwind three hours from Japan and it caused us to be maybe six
minutes late in landing. Have you been waiting long?"
"No, Master Kaitou. I just finished delivering your brother to school."
Kaitou frowned, then sighed. "I suppose I should ask about my family,
despite the fact they're all loonier then TV evangelists. Are the authorities
still allowing my older siblings to run lose?"
"Your brother is the Regional Kendo champion and your sister is the
Regional Rhythmic Gymnastic champion."
Kaitou took a deep breath, then shook his head in exasperation. "I'll
take that as a 'yes'. Is Tatewaki still running around with that boken?"
"Yes sir."
"And still sprouting bad poetry?"
"I can not attest to your brother's skill with words."
"And he's still calling himself the 'Shooting Star of Furinkan High'?"
"Actually, Master Kaitou, he now calls himself 'The Blue Thunder of
Furinkan High'."
"Wonderful." Kaitou looked at Shingi. "And you and your family wondered
why I went all the way to MIT for my degree?"
"I thought it was because MIT was a good school."
"In part, but it also to get as far away as I could get from the
crackpot ensemble that insists that they're related to me by blood."
"I didn't realize it was that bad," replied Shingi with a shrug. "All
I've ever heard about them is what Uncle Sasuke told me."
"After listing to this, you'll probably wish you'd stay home. Nermia is
the Twilight Zone made real."
Shingi shrugged again. "I wanted to see Japan for myself. Father doesn't
talk much about his childhood here, and outside of Uncle Sasuke, he has no
living relatives. Besides, had bad can your family be?"
"It depends," replied Kaitou. He looked at his family's retainer. "Did
the police mages to intercept that hit team I warned you about last month?"
"Yes Master Kaitou. The Police stopped them three blocks shy of the
estate and were taken into custody with no problems."
"Good. Did you destroy the formula?"
"As you instructed. Mistress Kodachi was rather upset at its loss."
"Better to have her upset then the target of every nutcase and personal
injury lawyer in the world."
Shingi blinked. "Am I missing something here?" he asked.
Kaitou sighed. "My 'loving sister' accidently created a formula for
nerve gas that would make Sarian look like cologne. Word managed to get out
to
a fringe group looking for a weapon of mass destruction and they decided they
would steal the formula, kidnap my sister, and hold both of them for ransom.
I
found out about it and sent word to Sasuke."
"What's so bad about that? It sounds like you saved your sister from a
bunch of psychos."
"Not exactly. I saved a bunch of psychos FROM my sister. Kodachi is
about as helpless as an enraged Tiger with a hangover, and makes the Marque
de
Sade look like a boy scout. Rumor has it her laugh will be declared a weapon
of mass destruction by the UN sometime soon." Kaitou shook his head.
"Tatewaki
can be reasoned with sometimes, but Kodachi is so far out in left field, she
owns the concession stands for the bleachers. Save yourself some pain and
time, avoid my sister at all costs."
"Fine by me."
"Sasuke, Is father still at home?"
The old man shook his head. "He's gone on an extended holiday to Hawaii,
and won't be back for six weeks."
"Thank the gods for small favors. I envy your loyalty, Sasuke. You have
done something I couldn't do, namely put up with my own family."
"I serve them as Shingi serves you." The older man smiled. "And they
keep me young, in their own way."
Kaitou looked down at the floor. "I should say hello to them, assuming
they don't know I'm coming."
"I neglected to mention it to them."
Kaitou looked up, a wolfish smile on his face "Good. It's about time I
gave them a scare -- as they say in America, 'Payback is a bitch,' and I
intend to start early and often. Have you found a place when I can set up my
lab?"
"Yes, Master Kaitou. There's a house just down the street from the Tendo
Dojo that is up for sale. I have made an offer for it, in your name,
contingent on your approval."
"Tendo Dojo?" Kaitou's eyes clouded over, and his smile got bigger. For
a moment, it looked like his spectacles were going to fog up, but never quite
made it. "D-does Nabiki have a boyfriend yet?"
"Besides money, there is no other strong attachment in her life at the
present time."
"N-N-Nabiki," stammered Kaitou softly, the smile becoming a silly grin.
"M-m-my Nabiki...."
Shingi frowned. "Oh great," he muttered. "Of all the times to go ga-
ga..."
Sasuke looked concerned. "Is Master Kaitou all right?"
"Don't worry. He'll be find in a minute." Shingi slapped Kaitou on the
back of the head with enough force to send the boy stumbling forward.
Kaitou spun quickly, a look of anger and surprise on his face. "What did
you do that for?" he shouted.
"Sorry, bud," replied Shingi with a straight face, "you were heading
into one of your Nabiki spells."
"A Nabiki spell?' asked Sasuke.
Shingi nodded. "Whenever the Boss here thinks about this girl Nabiki, he
goes ga-ga. Luckily, we caught this spell early. I've seen him when he's
having one of his bad spell. It isn't pretty."
"How bad do they get?'
His nephew grimaced. "He starts writing and performing poetry exhorting
the virtues of this Nabiki. BAD poetry. At his poetry-spouting worst, I've
seen him empty a crowded lunch room in five minutes."
"Damm it!" Kaitou closed his eyes. "I'm sorry. I thought I had it under
control."
"No sweat, Boss. She must be a heck of a girl to get that sort of
reaction out of you."
Kaitou's eyes began to glaze over again. With a sigh, Shingi slapped
Kaitou on the back of the head again. "Boss," he said in a low voice. "If you
go ga-ga on me again before we get out of the airport, I'll tell your
brother."
The threat seemed to have the right effect. The dazed expression faded,
and the same look of quiet completion returned. "That will not be
necessary."
He swallowed slowly. " I think I have arrived home at the right time."
Sasuke pointed at the two bags sitting next to the boys. "Is that all
you luggage?"
Kaitou nodded. "Most of my other stuff was shipped ahead. Once I've
decided where I'm going to live, we'll make the arrangements to have it
moved."
"You could come home to the Estate. You room could be ready in a couple
of hours."
Kaitou frowned. "That hasn't been my home since Mother died," he said
flatly. "And I'm not sure I have all the correct antidotes for my 'dear
sister's' latest concoctions. I don't suppose the UN has sent an Inspector to
check her lab for banned bioweapons?"
"There's a possibility that Mistress Kodachi's pet ate him. I found some
scraps of cloth and half a pair of glasses near his pool last week."
Oh, Shame," muttered Kaitou. "I suppose it's too late to turn around and
go back to the US?"
"Relax, will you?" said Shingi cheerfully. "As the saying goes, "there's
no place like home."
"That's because whoever coined that phrase never lived with my family."
He leaned down and pick up a bag. "Let's get going. Let's go take a look at
this house you've found, Sasuke."
**********
Disclaimer and Author's notes
Ranma 1/2 belongs to Takahashi-sama, Shogakukan Video, Viz
Communications, and Shonen Sunday Comics.
Kaitou Kunou and Shingi Kashin are my creations. This entire idea come
out of the darkness and sort of blind-sided me -- what happen if there was a
third Kunou child, a "Black Sheep" of the family that was an almost 180*
shift
in intelligence and sanity?
However, my experience with the series Ranma 1/2 has come from watching
the first four episodes of the anime (once), paging through several of the
Manga titles and fanfiction, mostly Xovers. My field of writing is Bubblegum
Crisis and Sailor Moon, and those are the stories I need to work on. Adding
another story series to my limited writing time is not an option, but I like
to think that there is a viable, light hearted story in this idea, and two
characters that will fit into the scenery I am posting this on the off chance
that someone on this list with more Ranma experience can take this up, or at
least devote some more time to it then I can. If anyone wants this, please
Email me.
Craig