Disclaimer: No, I don't own these people so don't sue me. I'm only a
student and it
is Christmas after all, have a heart. Wait, you're lawyers...never mind.
;P
The Silver Candle
By Murasakikaze
"It's snowing..." The words seemed to echo in the empty room and only
left a bigger
emptiness in my heart. The small white snowflakes drifted down and
settled on the
window sill. It was Christmas Eve and everyone else was asleep. It was
at this
time of the year that I missed having my family nearby...no matter how
screwed up
they were. I could only faintly remember my last Christmas with them
gathered
around the tree with the candles burning and the cider steaming in the
cups. My
last Christmas before Mother died...Father died later on that year and it
left me
practically alone. Sure, maybe I wasn't really alone, but it was close
enough.
A sigh escaped my lips as I stood. Maybe I could sneak downstairs
without
anyone else noticing me. Gourry and Amelia was out like a light and that
left only
one other person, but they weren't going to care. The door squeaked
slightly when I
turned the knob and I froze. A minute passed and nothing happened so I
pushed
the door open and quietly crept down the darkened hall. I knew the
stairs were
creaky so I slid down on the banister; it was faster anyway.
"What are you doing up?"
I whirled around and found the only other person who would possibly be up
behind
me. "I was just...uh...coming down for some water. I got thirsty, is
that wrong?"
They shook their head and walked over to where I wanted to be, next to
the huge
tree. "I thought you were coming to see this, that's all."
I scoffed. "Why would I want to see that old thing? I was up and I got
thirsty. Now
if you'll excuse me."
I left and went into the kitchen. I filled up the glass and went
outside...into the
snow. The same snow that took my parents. Sure, it was cold, but I
didn't care
because I was used to the cold.
"Zelgadis, are you sure you're alright?" I turned and saw that she'd
followed me out.
"I'm fine, Lina. Go back inside," I assured her and continued walking.
I hadn't
changed out of my clothes yet and she had, she'd freeze in a moment...and
the
snow would take her like it had taken my mother. I glanced over my
shoulder and
saw that she was gone. That's why I liked having Lina as a friend, she
wasn't stupid
and she knew when to leave.
I pulled my hood up and threw the glass aside. If she was downstairs, I
wouldn't be
able to do what I had wanted. I'm not a sentimental person, mind you,
but
sometimes I like to relive the good parts of my past. When I was small
my mother
used to lie down by the tree and let me watch the candles' fire dance. I
enjoy
watching the inferno's dance now because of her and because it kills the
snow. My
father on the other hand...I could have done without him. I got wind
that he died
about a week after Mom did from the local guards. They'd found him
wandering
around in the snow delirious and saying how the angels had taken his
angel away.
He always was insane... It probably came from Granddad's side. He was a
loon
too.
I finally realized that I'd wandered out into the forest and stopped next
to a frozen
pond. I sat down in the snow and both reveled in and hated its icy
touch. The
snowflakes came and rested upon my face as I closed my eyes. If I had
one wish
for today it would be for my mother to be alive again. I missed her and
only her out
of my entire screwed up life. She was the only one who could ever make
me feel
like there was something worth living for in this damn world. I sighed
and suddenly
felt tired for some reason...very tired....
"Zel-chan, come on, Zel-chan, wake up. You're going to miss it."
I opened my eyes and found her looking down at me. Her long black hair
fell around
her shoulders like a nighttime waterfall and her dark blue eyes sparkled
as the
candles caught their beauty. Candles...
"Mom?" The words seemed to tremble as they hung in the cold air.
"Yes, sweetie?" She turned and smiled at me as she took my hand. Her
hand
completely encompassed mine as we walked and I realized that I had to be
sleeping. "What is it, Zel-chan?"
I shook my head. If it was a dream, I would enjoy it. "I love you,
Mom."
"I love you too, Zel-chan. Now we better hurry before Daddy finds out,
okay?
Remember this is our little secret." Again she smiled and it filled my
heart with the
warmth I had been missing for so long. I nodded and ran to walk with her
side by
side. Today wasn't just Christmas it was my seventh birthday and I knew
she'd
done something special, she always did.
"Close your eyes, sweetie, I have a surprise for you." I happily obliged
and let her
lead me into the living room. "Okay, open them."
I gasped and ran forward. The entire room was filled with candles that
burned and
danced and lit my heart on fire. I quickly spun around and hugged her.
"I love it! Thank you, Mom!" I cried and felt her kiss my forehead.
"I thought you'd like this. There's one candle that I didn't light and
that's for you on a
very special occasion, okay? When you light it, make a wish and maybe
it'll come
true," she whispered softly and reached underneath the tree. When I saw
her hand
again it held a small blue box tied with a silver ribbon. "Happy
birthday and Merry
Christmas, sweetheart."
"Can I open it now?" I asked eagerly and gripped the box in my hands...my
human
hands. She nodded and sat down next to me as I carefully removed the
ribbon and
lifted the lid. "Mom...it's beautiful..."
I took the small pillar candle out and watched the candlelight glint off
the silver hues.
There was a small heart shaped crystal imprinted into the side of the
candle and it
burned with a fire within. It was then that I noticed the small burn
marks on her
fingers and on her wrists in just the right places.
"You made this for me...didn't you?" I turned to her and saw the sly grin
spread
across her face.
"How did you figure it out?" she asked innocently.
"Call it a guess," I joked and hugged her again. "Thanks, Mom. I love
it."
She kissed me on the forehead and stood up. "You want to watch the fire
again?"
I nodded and she lied down by the tree again. I snuggled up next to her
and felt her
warm arms wrap around me. It was all so familiar and real...I didn't
want it to be a
dream. I had burned the candle only a few months ago after carrying it
with me for
so long. I had wanted her back for my 20th birthday, but even with my
wish it didn't
do anything. I also wished that I could go back in time and save her
from the
disease that the snow brought. Save her from the coldness that I felt in
the
morning. She died on my seventh birthday you see...that was the last
time I ever
felt her arms around me again.
"Is Zelgadis-san going to be alright?"
"Yeah, his head's thick enough. He couldn't have frozen that badly,
Amelia, don't
worry."
I opened my eyes and found my friends staring at me. "What...where...aw
shit."
"He's better," Gourry sighed and walked off.
"Zelgadis-san! Thank the gods, we thought you were dead or something!"
Amelia
threw her arms around me and I pushed her away.
"Well, I'm not and I'd like it if you didn't do that," I growled and sat
up.
"Hey, Zel, be grateful she found you. You were practically dead from the
cold," Lina
scoffed and knocked me on the head. "You were stupid to be wandering
around out
there."
"So I was stupid, sue me," I growled and walked off.
"Lina-san...what's wrong with him?" I heard Amelia ask.
"It's his birthday, Amelia...and something else. It's the anniversary of
his mother's
death. Just let him be," Lina replied and turned away.
"That's awful, Lina-san!" I didn't stay for the rest of the conversation.
I didn't need
the justice loving brat trying to console me. I didn't need anything but
solitude and
my memories...no matter how few they were.
Later that night Gourry came to my room and dropped something off. He
said he'd
found it under the tree after Lina had finished running through
everything. It was
then that I began to believe in miracles again...well, at least a little
bit. The blue box
was tied with a silver ribbon and inside was a silver candle that was
just the tiniest
bit lopsided with a heart shaped crystal that had a fire that burned
within. There was
a little note inside that said:
"Happy 20th Birthday, Zel-chan. Light it and make a wish. Maybe it'll
come true."
Maybe there are such things are wishes.
~~~~
Merry Christmas everyone.
~Murasakikaze