Note: Episode Numbers follow standard production-numbering practices.
|\ | ot very far in the future [a month from now, actually,] About
| \ | a star a mere 4.5 lightyears from our own, Orbits a satellite.
| \ | This satellite is of an odd shape. This reflects it's layout.
| \ | A network server with a hyperspace transceiver, a work-area-
| \ | slash-living-quarters, and a cinema. We now zoom in on the
| \| work-area-slash-living-quarters.
[You see a GIRL trying desperately to build something.]
GIRL: [gloomily] Oh, hi; Cambot.
[You hear a beeping noise, the girl ignores it. It continues, sounding
quite impatient.]
GIRL: Oh, all right! What is it? [Notices a light on whatever fixture
the camera is on.] Oh, we're live! Hi there, my name's Rebeka
Thomas. I was sentenced to three (3) years watching bad fanfics
because of my habit of taking on projects and being unable to get
anything done. After the sentence is up, I must stay up here
until I finish all of my current projects, and have a good start
on any that are already up here. Right now I'm working on a robot
to help me keep my sanity during this time.
[REBEKA starts fiddling with a knob on a device on top of the robot's
clear, glass, bubble-like head.]
REBEKA [muttering to herself:] Lessee... if I use the plasma charge
generator with the flux regulator, it should form conscious
thought patterns on its own....
[The ROBOT, who looks a lot like Tom Servo, activates and begins
talking]
ROBOT: Oh no, not again....
REBEKA: Not again what?
ROBOT: You wouldn't understand. There's this guy, I think his name was
Arthur Dent, who keeps killing me every time I get reincarnated.
by activating this robot, you just yanked me out of the after-
life for another go at it.
REBEKA: Well, you lucked out. You were probably reincarnated into a
parallel universe. So, what's your name?
ROBOT: I don't remember...
REBEKA: Well since you were getting killed all the time, we'll just
call you Kenny.
KENNY: Fine with me.
REBEKA: Well, I still need one more companion before we can start...
[No sooner then she says it, Bill GATES appears out of thin air]
REBEKA: What are you doing here?!
GATES: Well, after the apocalypse, I was... waitaminute this is the
past so you probably don't know my identity. Hi, I'm the devil.
After the apocalypse, which happened in 99,999 AD, happened, A
spontaneous portal opened up at the bottom of the lake of
burning sulfur [1] and I was sent here. Where is here, anyway?
REBEKA: This is a satellite, which is being used by the FFML as
punishment for not working on any of my projects. I'm stuck
here watching bad fanfics, and it looks like so are you. fallen
angel or not, you can't breathe without air, and they drain it
from everywhere but the theater.
GATES: Okay... I suppose we're supposed to make fun of the fic, like in
that tv series, whatwasitcalled...
REBEKA: MST3k, but we're not supposed to know that. Fourth wall and all
that.
GATES: Okay.
[ Suddenly, a sign with 8 seven-segment cells lights up with the words:
WARNING!
*blink*
*blink*
OSCARFIC
*blink*
*blink*
<repeat>
]
REBEKA: Uh oh... We've got oscarfic sign!!!!!!
Door 1: It's a revolving door. You go through it Clockwise, which is
the wrong direction.
Door 2: It's an automatic door. You step in front of it and it opens.
Doors 3&4: An airlock. Since there's no pressure deferential, you step
through both quickly
Door 5: A drawbridge. It narrowly misses your feet.
Door 6: A circular door like in the Goldeneye video game.
Tune in next time, When Rebeka, Kenny, and Bill Gates riff the infamous
fanfic "Artemis's Lover"
[1] It's mentioned in the Bible that during the end of the world, Satan
will be cast by the nations of earth into the 'lake of burning sulfur'
after being discovered for what he is.