At 08:20 PM 7/23/99 PDT, you wrote:
C&C please chainsaws afterward
OK
Dragon Knight Ranma
by Trevor Hoffert
Prologue
Ranma had come across many half-baked and
so many
failure cures that he was wary of anything claiming to
useless cures
cure curses and such. This cure wasn't a true cure as
such but a banishment of his curse. The instructions
read that it would banish his most hated thing from his body.
You could have used this phrase alone to do the transference.
Because Ranma's curse is such a part of him, and is in effect
simply another aspect of his nature, the 'cure' could have
focused on his self hatred, and banished 'him'. Akane could
have been sucked along, or dove in after him.
Your way works just as well, however, but this way could have
been used as a plot point. The only way Ranma can get home is
to come to acceptance of his nature.
Thus on a quiet weekend with no distractions,
this being no one had bothered him for over an hour.
distractions, no one having bothered him for over and hour,
Ranma
Ranma was able to complete most of the spell required
to complete the 'cure'. The last part of the spell
involved a small idol with three candles on it. The
instructions required the caster to cause the three
flames to form a circle. There were many ways for an
actual mage to do this. Ranma knew only one such way:
the Hiruu Shoten Ha (sp?).
Simply swirling his hand in the air above them might do it
considering how fast he can move his hand.
As fate would have it Ranma was interrupted
just as he finished the spell. This had the effect of
screwing up the spell. Ranma of course had failed to read
the Really Small Print (tm). The print mostly said
'the most common failure of the spell is a transport
spell but since you probably didn't read this, it's your fault'.
I'd change this, to something like.
Make dang sure you are really sure of what you hate, and focus
on it. Because the spell works on what you most hate, you
have to give it some cue as to what that is.
Frankly, Ranma is mostly annoyed by his curse most of the time.
I think he only really hates it when he has to deal with
Kuno or Happosai.
He should have focused on either of them in his mind, and
how much he hated being fondled while a girl.
Akane had for the most part been wondering where
Ranma was. At first she had checked around town at the
Amazon hussy's place, then at Ucchan's and final in the
Tendo Dojo. Akane entered just as Ranma finished the words
of the Hiruu Shoten Ha. The words on her lips died as she
watched as the resulting whirlwind formed at her best guess
a hole in the fabric of time and space. The downside of this
is she also seemed to be airborne.
Ranma completed the final upercut to the Hiruu
Shoten Ha and watched in triumph as the flames began to
circle. Then as many cops say the excrement hit the fan.
Akane opened up the door and his concentraion was broken.
Then the hole that formed sucked Akane in. Ranma let loose a
scream of horror as Akane vanished. He rushed toward the
hole but some force slowed his progress. Ranma was a strong
person but he felt as if Ryoga was keeping from the hole.
Then something had to give either the force or Ranma.
Something did. Ranma saw the hole start to close. He
strained harder then he felt something tear and his world
went dark.
I liked Dragon Knight, though I've been somewhat disastified with
the more recent books, especially when Carolinous blocked Angie off
from magic.
Are you going to make this a fusion, with Ranma taking on the roles
of James and Angie, or are you going to have them present in this world
I'd vote for the latter. I'm not that fond of fusions, you seem to lose
important parts of either series.
If Ranma ended up in the body of a dragon, you'd lose the Gender Changing
element. Of course if it was a female Dragon . . .
But how would you know, I have a feeling that only a dragon, or a mage, could
tell the difference, well, maybe a dragon hunter as well.
I'll be interested in what you can do with this.
I'd offer to be a full time Pre-reader, but I'm afraid I don't have
the time. -_-;;;;
T.H.