As many have mentioned to me in previous letters when I first
attempted to post this fic and sent a deluge of badly formated text,
that I should keep my posts limited. So, to only whet your
appettites, I am only sending out for now, the first three episodes.
There are 20 some already done, but I don't need to flood your e-mail
boxes with excessive text.
---------
NOTE: All characters original to the "Tenchi Muyo! TV1"
series portrayed in this story are the sole property
of AIC and Pioneer Animation. Any appearance of them in
actual life is purely coincidental. Tenchi Muyo! material
and paraphernalia listed within is Copyright Pioneer
Animation 1997 (c). Kyoto Minamoto, Muriyaki Kushiragi,
Chisako, Chi-Ohki, and all other related characters
are the sole property of R&C Books and appear through
their permission.
Episode 2:
No Need for Another Me!
Two weeks have passed since Kyoto's unwelcome arrival
on Earth. To everyone's surprise, things have been
peaceful. He's even been helping out with the chores and
only making occasional passes at Ryoko.
One evening, Kyoto is sweeping the hallway. He is about
to turn the corner and go into the living room when he sees
Kiyone and Mihoshi go into the bathroom together. "..Maybe
that's why Kiyone puts up with Mihoshi...." he muses.
Attempting to sneak a peek at them, he walks over to the
bathroom door and tugs on the handle. The door slides open
to reveal.... nothing.
"What in Hell...?!" Kyoto is dumbfounded until a stray
thought hits him. "Hmm... Since Washu lives here...."
Focusing his will, he takes on the form of Sasami. S/he
closes the door and then reopens it. Now inside the
bathroom is a large hot spring or resort style communal
bath, complete with palm trees and a large, decorative
fountain in the center. Lounging in the steaming water are
Mihoshi and Kiyone, their clothes neatly folded on a
near-by bench. Mihoshi is the first to notice
Sasami/Kyoto's entrance. "Hi, Sasami!"
Kyoto opens his mouth to respond when he suddenly realizes
that his voice would come out. So he settles for a smile
and a wave. S/he then takes off his/her clothing and lowers
him/herself into the warm water. Mihoshi and Kiyone are
relaxing, almost asleep, that they do not notice
Sasami/Kyoto's lustful eyes on them. They also do not
notice how many times Sasami/Kyoto smacks him/herself
on the head in an attempt to sustain concentration.
The door slides open again, and Ryoko walks in. Her robe
can barely hold her in, and she discards it with a
flourish. Kyoto's eyes go wide open! However, it is at that
moment that Ayeka and the real Sasami enter. There are a
few minutes of confusion as the ladies start to realize
that there is one more Sasami than usual. However, it only
takes a few minutes to decipher who the fake Sasami is.
Tenchi is heading to the bathroom when the door is flung
violently open and Kyoto dashes out holding a towel wrapped
loosely around his mid-section. The ladies, all wrapped
in towels or robes quickly follow him, chasing after him
swinging whatever heavy objects they can find. Tenchi
stands blinking for a minute as this strange procession
rumbles past, then he yells, "Kiyone, don't use the laser
in the house!" She must not have heard him, for he sees
several blue bolts slice through a window.
Despite his pursuers' dogged persistence, Kyoto manages
to escape.
By now the girls are fully dried and dressed, but no less
angry. Ayeka in particular is fuming. "I cannot stand that
horrible, horrible man! Always making a mess of things,
always trying to see us naked, and always trying to touch
us.... I cannot take it anymore!"
She takes a pad and pencil, and scribbles a terse phrase.
She then hands the piece of paper to Kiyone. "Kiyone,
could you have Yagami send this out by microburst to the
nearest Juraian outpost?"
Kiyone looks over the contents of the paper. "Isn't this
a little drastic?" The look on Ayeka's face gives her
answer quite clearly, and Kiyone sighs and leaves for her
ship.
A few days later, Kyoto is lounging on his space station's
control deck. All of a sudden alarms start blaring and
sensor screens start popping into appearance. On the
screen, a fleet of Jurai battleships have surrounded
the space station. A second later on another screen, the
face of a Juraian admiral appears. "Kyoto Minamoto,
by order of Princess Ayeka and the Galaxy Police, you are
here by placed under arrest, and you damn well already
know the charges!"
Kyoto merely smiles. "Come and get me!"
The Juraian admiral's face turns red with anger. "All ships
lock onto his position and fire! Maximum gun aperture!"
The Juraian dreadnoughts release a hail storm of
bluish-white fire on the space station. Just about any
other structure, natural or artificial, would have wilted
under such a furious broadside.
However, Kyoto's space station isn't any other structure.
And as always, Kyoto still has a few cards left to play....
On Earth, the Masaki house and everyone in it starts to
vanish. They find themselves remanifesting aboard Kyoto's
station. The princesses instantaneously find themselves
on the bridge next to Kyoto. Kyoto opens a channel to the
flagship and enjoys the startled expression on the Juraian
admiral's face. "My dear Admiral, I would suggest you stop
firing, lest you harm the princesses. Or before I am forced
to." He extracts his sword from its sheath and dances the
sharp edge of the blade across both of their throats.
On the screen, the Admiral looks like he is about to wet
his pants. "I-I-I-"
His stuttering is drowned out when Sasami begins to cry.
"Ayeka! I'm scared!"
At that, Kyoto's lazy smile turns malicious. "Or maybe I
won't kill them... They're both awfully pretty...."
With that he rests his hand on Ayeka's rump and squeezes.
Ayeka jumps.
"And I certainly can go for little girls. After all, they
all become big girls eventually...." He squeezes Sasami's
shoulders, bringing more tears out of the girl's eyes.
On the screen, the Admiral looks like he has wet his pants.
"Alright! Alright!" he turns to his chief gunnery officer.
"Have all ships stand down from combat status. With- draw
to extreme firing range."
Kyoto smiles. "That's just what I was waiting to hear."
He then spins his sword in the air above him and sends the
blade slamming down into a fitting slot in the floor. The
blade instantly begins to glow a brilliant blue as the
exterior of the station starts to sprout gun batteries.
These gun batteries start to spit out red and blue beams
of death.
Hundreds of ships are immediately caught off guard as this
barrage begins to immolate their brethren. They don't,
however, remain speechless for very long as their gun ports
start to return the favor. However, they find themselves
shooting at empty space.
Kyoto's station has vanished.
For whatever consolation it is, Kyoto's not exactly having
a picnic, either. By now, Tenchi and company have made
their way up onto the bridge and are generally causing
havoc. When they first appeared, Sasami ran to Tenchi and
is now clinging to him like a rock to the ground. Kiyone
has her pistol out and is training it on Kyoto, keeping
him still while Ayeka is kicking at him. She is being held
back by Ryoko who wants the first punch. Washu is looking
around the bridge to see if she can find anything of
importance, Nobuyuki is looking around for the naked women,
and Grandpa is merely looking around with a bored
expression. "Well, here we go again."
No one notices what Mihoshi is doing until they hear her
voice squeal, "What's this do?" Everyone's heads flip
around to see Mihoshi tapping random keys on one of the
translucent computers hovering above Kyoto's glowing sword.
Kyoto's face darkens with horror.
"What in the hell are you doing? Don't touch that!" He
grabs her and pushes her away from the console. He scans
the display with growing dismay. "What did you do?!"
Kiyone casts a glare at her partner, who seems to wilt
under the harsh gaze. "This happens more than you might
think." Anyone else's speaking is canceled out by the
sudden revving of the main engines.
Washu rushes up to the main console and takes a long look
at Mihoshi's handy work. "If anyone could do it..... She's
overloaded the main drive." All of a sudden the station's
revving turns to a rumbling and starts shaking, throwing
the people off and around.
Washu scrambles back to the control board, this time taking
more time to take a closer look at the display. Tenchi
asks, "Washu, what's going on?!"
Washu turns back to him and says, "I don't know!" All of a
sudden the station's shaking stops abruptly and without
warning every member of the group is overcome with the
sensation of dislocation with their bodies. Tenchi thinks
that he can see several dozen alternate versions of himself
float past his eyes. Without warning, the world suddenly
snaps back into focus.
Floating in front of them except empty star studded space
is a planet. The planet is turquoise and white, surrounded
by two delicate, almost imperceptible rings that intersect.
Ayeka stands up. "Is that Jurai?"
Before anyone can respond, however, the station is suddenly
rocked again, threat screens start appearing once again
and Kyoto leaps to his command chair as he sees
vicious-looking attack ships.
"If they are from Jurai, they've certainly undergone
an overhaul!" Before anyone else can speak, a large Juraian
battleship shows up looking much the same as a normal one,
except being painted black and red, and having a skull
engraved on the bow. A moment later a communications
screen materializes in the center of the bridge.
The image is of.... Ryoko, except dressed in Juraian
clothing, much to the style Ayeka wears. This person says,
"I am Princess Ryoko of the planet Jurai."
Ayeka's mouth drops open and she starts spouting, "What
do you mean you're the princess, I am the princess!"
The Princess Ryoko's eyes fly wide open. "What?!...
You're harboring the space criminal Ayeka and her daughter
Sasami!" Ayeka's mouth drops open a little farther this
time as she and Sasami exchange confused glances.
Kiyone steps forward. "This is Detective Sergeant Kiyone
Makibi of the Galaxy Police. I demand to know what is going
on here!"
All at once, Princess Ryoko's expression softens. "Ah, GP
Director General Kiyone, I trust you and your husband
are well. She then sees Mihoshi. "Oh, President Mihoshi!"
By now, the Princess Ryoko's expression has softened
considerably. "I'm sorry, I had no idea! I assumed that you
were in cahoots with her, but now I see that you were
returning her to Jurai for trial. Very well, I shall meet
you in the spaceport."
Kyoto's station orbits in a geosynch over Jurai, and a
modified space yacht of his docks at the Jurai spaceport.
Princess Ryoko, with her consort the Lord Kyoto, is there
to greet them with warmth and courtesy.
Ryoko bows to Kiyone. "Director General Kiyone."
And then she bows to Tenchi. "And you Sir, how are you? Are
your and Kiyone's children doing well?"
Ryoko and Ayeka whip around to look at Kiyone, disbelief
and anger in their expressions. She meets their gaze with
a "don't get mad at me for this, it's out of my control"
look, the kind she typically has when dealing with Mihoshi.
By now, Princess Ryoko has moved on to Mihoshi. "Ah, Madame
President. So good to see you again. I do hope we'll be
able to discuss quantum theory again."
"Uhhhh..." Mihoshi looks completely lost.
Princess Kiyone then spots Washu. "Ah, Professor, I highly
enjoyed your last lecture at the Academy. I'm so interested
in the idea of alternate universes."
In retrospect, she would wonder why they all had rather
dumbfounded expressions on their faces.
As they leave the space port, they pass an older beggar
who happens to have what looks like a dark brown cabbit
next to him. The beggar looks up and asks, "Can anyone
spare some change?" On impulse, Tenchi reaches into his
pocket and pulls out a two thousand Yen note from his
pocket and places it in the beggar's soiled hand. They walk
past to a hover limo and get in. Once they are gone, Kyoto
and Ryoko reappear.
"What was that?!" asks Ryoko, feeling disconcerted
at the thought of being a princess of Jurai and nauseated
at the thought of being married to Kyoto.
"Whatever it is, I like it!" says Kyoto. "This is going
to get weird. I don't know how to undo what Mihoshi has
done, we'll need Washu for that. In the meantime, we might
as well lay low."
Ryoko shoots a look at him. "Don't you dare think about
that! Besides, how are we going to go around? Lay low? We
look just like the ruling couple of the planet."
Kyoto smiles at that. "I can change my form at will, as for
you, well, Muriyaki and her daughters can help."
Meanwhile, at the Palace of Jurai, Tenchi and company
find themselves the welcome guests of a large and ornate
banquet. Many a toast is made for his and Kiyone's
continued health and happiness. Many a question is asked
of President Mihoshi, how she plans to solve the galactic
debt, what's her policy on intergalactic communications
and other topics of high political importance. Fortunately,
she has the presence of mind to repeatedly say, "No
comment."
Several professor types try to attach themselves to Washu,
although for discussions of scientific importance or just
a simple "big bang", one's not sure.
(Meanwhile, Ayeka, her daughter Sasami, and her husband
Nobuyuki are languishing in jail or what passes for jail
on Jurai. In actuality, the holding facility is really
quite nice. About the equivalent of a Holiday Inn on Earth,
except you can't go down to the lobby or to the restaurant.
Naturally, Ayeka finds it beneath her.)
Meanwhile, back at the banquet hall a hush falls over the
crowd, for the Empress of Jurai has entered. People start
to bow or curtsy, as the case may be.
Tenchi and Kiyone's mouths drop open as the Empress comes
up to them. Ryoko, of course, is oblivious to this.
"Director General Kiyone and her husband Tenchi, I'd like
you to meet my mother, Nagi, the Empress of Jurai."
Somehow, Tenchi and Kiyone manage to keep from making fools
of themselves, but as soon as Nagi, the Empress, has moved
past and Ryoko and Kyoto have had their attention moved,
Kiyone whispers to Tenchi, "That's it! This has definitely
got to be an alternate universe! There's no way in hell a
bounty hunter like Nagi could be a Empress in our
universe!"
Tenchi shrugs, "With all the stuff that happens to us, this
does not surprise me much." He smiles wryly at Kiyone,
and her cheeks flush slightly as she returns the smile.
Just then Mihoshi leans over to Kiyone. "Kiyone, what's
a tax deficit?"
With all the dignitaries and such at this banquet, no one
notices three strikingly beautiful young women walking
through the door accompanied by two floating logs- Azaka
and Kamidake. One is Muriyaki Kushiragi, who we already
know. The second has soft, blue hair falling down her back
and gathered in a loose ponytail-Ryoko totally made over.
The third bears a striking resemblance to what Sasami might
look like when she's twenty only with long, forest green
hair done up in a simple ponytail running down her back to
her posterior. This is Kyoto's female form of the day.
By now, Tenchi and Kiyone are starting to enjoy themselves
as best they can in such an odd setting. The two of them
have managed to pry half of a rack of ribs away from
Mihoshi, who has naturally disposed of the other half by
herself. Kiyone is about to bite into her portion when she
suddenly feels someone pinching her butt. She jumps five
feet out of her chair and lands on her feet--to find half
the room staring at her. Forcing herself to giggle, she
says, "Honey, not in public!" This manages to save her some
face, although this noticeably embarrasses Tenchi.
Once Kiyone has sat back down, Tenchi leans over to her and
says, "Uh, Kiyone, that wasn't me!" He keeps himself from
commenting about how tempted he was, and Kiyone hides her
disappointment that is wasn't him.
"He's right, it was me," says a familiar voice.
Kiyone whips around to her right to see a beautiful
young lady who looks like a grown-up Sasami, save for the
hair color. She starts to sputter uncontrollably
when the young lady slides a folded note over to her. The
note reads: "It's me." At the bottom is scribbled:
"P.S. Hey, what's wrong with a friendly squeeze?" That
leaves absolutely no question as to who this person's
true identity is! Kiyone's mouth drops open.
Tenchi is about to ask "What's wrong?" when his own arm is
tugged on. He turns to see..... "Ryoko?!"
Meanwhile, this universe's Kyoto, who is known to have a
roving eye (If not necessarily roving hands) has just
settled his sights on the gorgeous new arrival sitting
next to Kiyone. Kiyone catches sight of this. "Oh, my
Lord.... "
Tenchi follows her gaze and sees the reason for her
discomfort. "Um, Kyoto, I think you'd better leave..."
The female Kyoto looks at Tenchi with a quizzical
expression, but then feels someone's eyes on his/her back
and is shocked to see that.... "Oh, my god, I want me!"
However, s/he waves back and smiles.
Mihoshi suddenly reappears, holding a thick envelope
in her hand. "Kiyone, look! Someone just gave me some money
for saying that nuclear power isn't outdated! And he said
that if I said so to the media, he'd give me some hefty
'campaign contributions'! Isn't that great?!"
Kiyone buries her face in her hands, and Tenchi signals
for a stiff drink. "Um, on second thought, check, please."
Fortunately, the evening does wind down. Everyone retires,
either to their assigned rooms in the palace or to their
own homes. Kiyone and Tenchi go to their own chambers,
ignoring angry glares from Ryoko.
Washu and Muriyaki return to the station to effect repair
work. The female Kyoto is in the bar, taking as many free
drinks as he can. This Kyoto is so drunk that s/he doesn't
notice the male Kyoto coming up behind him/her. The female
Kyoto is very startled when the male Kyoto grabs him/her
by the shoulders.
"How would you like to see the royal scepter?" The male
Kyoto's left hand travels down the female Kyoto's neck.
He is equally drunk, and does not notice that he has his
left hand on a man's chest until a deep voice says, "No
sir, I would not like to see the royal scepter." The male
Kyoto realizes what he has done and starts backing away out
the door.
The formerly female Kyoto releases a sigh of relief, a new
sense of clarity rushing through his head. That was a close
call, he thinks. I was almost.... by me!
"Kyoto..."
He spins around to see the princess Ryoko wobbling towards
him. She is obviously inebriated. "Honey, let's go to
bed..." She collapses onto his shoulders, her arms draped
loosely around his neck. Suddenly he realizes that he has
her right where he wants her. There'll never be a better
time.... He scoops her up in his arms and carries her to
the bedroom.
Meanwhile, in their bedroom, Tenchi and Kiyone are still
deliberating over who gets the bed. Overcome with
exhaustion, the two of them finally collapse onto the bed.
"Talk about your strange situations," mutters Tenchi.
"Yeah, I know," echoes Kiyone. "Who would have thought
there would be...." She leans over to look in his eyes
and-and-"....a universe where we-" She shakes her head
sharply. "It's so impossible...."
Tenchi leans in closer to her. "What's so impossible?"
"This...." She hands him a framed picture sitting on the
nightstand. The two of them, in wedding garb, looking
happy and carefree, as if time would always be so
kind...."Don't you see it?! Don't you....." Inexplicably,
the career Galaxy Police officer, the best of the best,
the one who never let anything--or anyone--through
to her, starts to cry. Almost as if by instinct, Tenchi
wraps his arms around her and holds her close, her sobs
shaking their bodies and tears soaking his shirt. Slowly
the sobs subside and she looks up, letting Tenchi wipe the
tears from her eyes. "Sorry."
Kiyone looks up into Tenchi's face and sees--can
it?--he--he--
"It's all right. Don't worry." He smiles down at her, and
she suddenly starts to feel lightheaded.
Instinctively she curls up against him. "Tenchi, I....you
don't have to, but could you just....hold me for a little
while?"
He enfolds her in his arms again. "As long as you want,
Kiyone. As long as you want."
* * *
"...It's another Tequila Sunrise... And this old world
still looks the same... Another frame...." Washu can hear
Kyoto before she can see him. Although he doesn't have a
bad singing voice, the slurring of the words implies that
he is not entirely sober. She stands up to greet him. "I'm
not sure Don Henley would approve, Kyoto." Kyoto is
obviously drunk and he spins around to slur at Washu, "And
who do you think gave him the words to this song?!" He then
collapses face first on the floor.
* * * *
The hours pass slowly for Tenchi, as he still holds Kiyone
close. At the moment, she is dozing quietly, and he regards
her with quiet affection. He sighs. "Kiyone? Kiyone, you
awake?" He listens for a few minutes with no response.
"I....I....oh, hell, I can't even say this when you're
asleep. Do you know how wonderful you look when your
asleep?" He sighs again. "You look so peaceful, a peace
I rarely see when you're awake and dealing with Mihoshi.
How many times I've seen you on the verge of tears and
wanted to....hold you, I guess, just do something to bring
back your beautiful smile...." Unbeknownst to Tenchi,
Kiyone quietly awakens, but hearing his words, decides
to feign sleep. "I'm not quite sure when your smile started
meaning the world to me. Maybe it was the night of the
carnival, you looked so cute in that outfit, and the smile
on your face when you gave Sasami the cotton candy....I
guess what I....oh, hell, Kiyone, I think I've fallen in
love with you." He sighs yet again, as he gently strokes
the back of her neck. "Now if only I could find a way to
tell you this when you're awake." He closes his eyes and
settles his head on the pillow. He feel shifting around
on top of him but figure she's just moving in her sleep.
"I love you too, Tenchi."
He suddenly sits up to find Kiyone, already sitting up,
looking at him and smiling
shyly. "Did you just....." He prays that he wasn't just
dreaming that.
"Oh Tenchi....." She scoots over next to him and lays her
head on his shoulder. "I did say that I love you, Tenchi.
I heard everything." She shifts around again, snuggling
up to him. "My Tenchi....I do love you...."
Tenchi's eyes go wide. He'd never thought that....but
now.... "I'm sorry, I should have--" She cuts him off with
a kiss. "Tenchi, it's alright." She links her arms around
his neck, kisses him again. "It'll be alright from now
on....."
Morning breaks on Jurai with the same insensitivity
that it does on Earth. However, the gentle sunlight shining
through the window in Tenchi and Kiyone's bedroom is a far
sight softer. Tenchi is sacked out in one of the chamber's
recliners, while Kiyone is stretched out on the bed. Kiyone
is the first to awaken, and her features soften with an
affectionate smile as she watches Tenchi snoring away in
the chair.
She remembers being snuggled up to him as the talked
earnestly and affectionately into the night.
And she remembers the confessions: she had kept her
feelings hidden, for she had felt that, with all the girls
vying for his attention, he wouldn't even look her way. For
his part, Tenchi had kept his mouth shut, afraid that he
might force her to choose between him or her career--and
that her career would win.
At the moment, however, she feels as giddy as a schoolgirl,
and she'd follow him to the ends of the cosmos and back,
and she senses that the feeling is mutual. She is about
to arise from the bed and wake him up when Mihoshi bursts
through the door.
"Ki-yo-ne! It's time to get up!! You too, Tenchi!"
Tenchi jumps out of his chair, whips out his light-sword,
and is about to light it up when he sees that it is only
Mihoshi who's burst through the door. "Mihoshi, what is
it?!"
Mihoshi has a great big grin on her face. "It's breakfast!"
Kiyone looks like she is about to kill her partner, but
Tenchi pushes Mihoshi out the door. "We'll be down in a
minute, Mihoshi!"
Once Mihoshi is gone, Tenchi steps over to the bed and
helps Kiyone to her feet. She looks down at her rumpled
clothing and makes a face. "I must be a mess."
Tenchi shakes his head and smiles. "You look wonderful."
She blushes slightly. "This may get a little complicated
.... although mostly for you...."
Tenchi takes her hands in his. "I think you're worth it."
Her heart melting, she shifts into his arms. After a few
minutes of bliss, they kiss briefly and head out the door,
hand in hand.
Unbeknownst to them, Mihoshi had not closed the door all
the way on her way out. She had peeked in to watch Tenchi
and Kiyone, and she smiles as she sees the two of them
kiss. "Good for you, Kiyone," she whispers. "I knew
it...all you had to do was tell him..."
She straightens up as they come out of the room, her smile
resetting to its default mindlessly cheerful. "Come on!
We've got to hurry!"
Kiyone smiles indulgently at her partner. "Calm down,
Mihoshi."
"Yeah," agrees Tenchi, his eyes seeking out Kiyone's.
"We've got plenty of time..."
Their eyes meet, and they smile slowly at the same time.
Mihoshi ends up having to push them into the elevator.
"Kyoto!! Wake up!" Having tried everything else (that she
dares to), Washu throws a bucket of cold water into Kyoto's
face. However, he still continues to sing old Eagles songs
off key. Horribly off key!
"Uhhhhhhhhhh..." Finally Kyoto's eyes start to slowly open.
"Little Washu?....God, I had a weird dream las'night....I
dreamed that I was comin' on......to me!
Y' got anythin' for a hangover?" Too late does he realize
just what he asked and just who.
"Uh, on second thought...."
Before he can withdraw his request, he finds himself bound
and fastened to one of Washu's patented research devices.
His body is literally covered with hundreds of sensors
and probes. "Washu, is all this really necessary?!"
Washu giggles as she hunches over her translucent
computer. "No." She giggles again. "I just want to see if
you've let yourself go downhill through the years." She
giggles yet again. "Aside from a bit of a pot-belly,
you're not doing badly."
Kyoto groans. "Does this experiment entail any other
embarrassments?"
Washu giggles yet again and then turns to stare at him with
a devilish smile.
Kyoto recognizes the look on her face and sends up a
desperate prayer to whatever gods there may be. "Anyway,
how are the repairs on the fold drive going?"
Drawn back to her original priority, Washu strikes a
thoughtful pose. "Slowly. The damage isn't irreparable,
but it's extensive. And even when we get it fixed, there's
no telling if we'll be able to get back to our dimension.
Mihoshi gave that engine a thorough going over. Whatever
she touches...."
Kyoto thinks for a minute. "Any parts need replacing?"
Washu snorts. "Any?! Try at least half ! Where in hell did
you get this thing? I've worked with a lot of FTL drives
in my time, and this is nothing like I've ever seen."
Kyoto wiggles a bit. "Lemme out this thing, and I'll tell
you."
Washu's face darkens a bit. "Only if you promise never to
call me 'Little Washu' ever again."
Kyoto nods, and Washu taps a couple of keys. Her creation
starts to fold in on itself, freeing him. Once he has made
sure that he is not missing anything (For one never knows
when dealing with one of Washu's devices), he settles
himself into a comfortable chair and gestures for Washu
to do likewise.
"I found this station in the old mothball yards off Anopon
Prime. I remember it just like it was yesterday......"
"No!" Washu throws another glass of cold water in his face.
"Don't you dare go into a flashback on me!"
"Alright, alright! Don't wet your pants! Or mine for that
matter. Anyway, I discovered it drifting powerless in the
shadow of that planet's moon. I bought it from the yard
boss for 63,000 yen and the trade in of my old cargo liner.
This, my dear Little Washu, was where I first met Muriyaki.
But that has nothing to do with it. Anyway, at that time
the station was still manually operated. So, being the
genius that I am, I redesigned the station's control
mechanism so that my sword must be inserted in order to
operate any of the functions. When I did this I discovered
the fold mechanism buried deep within the station's
systems. How it operates or for that matter what makes it
operate has left me dumbfounded. All I know is how to
operate it. Nothing more, nothing less."
The tool in Washu's right hand is slowly starting to bend
as the pressure she is exerting on it increases. "I thought
I told you never to call me Little Washu!!!" The anger
fades away when she remembers what else Kyoto has told her.
"You know nothing about it?!"
Kyoto shrugs. "I've told you all I know. The only thing
I can think of to do is to travel to Anopon Prime and try
to find this dimension's analogue of this station. You and
I could take Ryo-"
"Hold it!" snaps Washu. "What makes you think that I'll go
anywhere alone with you?"
"Well, we really don't have much choice, now do we?" Kyoto
shoots back. "B'sides, we can take Muriyaki if you-:"
"I'll take Ryo-ohki alone, thank you very much," Washu
returns, "Just to be on the safe side. Now Ryo-ohki's
fast, but it'll take us a while to get out there and
back-figure maybe two weeks-"
"Remember that we need to break Ayeka, Sasami, and Nobuyuki
outta jail, and our people on-surface will need to get
outta there in a hurry," points out Kyoto. "If you could
maybe work some of your magic on the station's conventional
translight drive-"
Washu nods. "In conventional supralight, this sucker pulls
about half a Yagami-class patrol ship's flank speed,
right?" At Kyoto's nod, she continues, "How 'bout I give
you a Juraian first-generation dreadnought's max emergency
speed? Lord knows you've got the firepower to be one."
Meanwhile, Tenchi and Kiyone have joined Mihoshi for
breakfast. Before they stop to eat breakfast, Kiyone checks
her watch and then turns a small dial on the rim. This
small dial will produce a blanketing effect that will
effectively jam any listening devices and to anyone in the
room who happens to be trying to eavesdrop it will make the
conversation sound mere small talk. Naturally, it is not.
As she and Tenchi sit down Mihoshi watches them.
"Boy, you two are acting just like you're married!"
she observes brilliantly. Tenchi and Kiyone exchange
exasperated glances at this, as they usually do when ever
she opens her mouth. Mihoshi pushes a folded newspaper
across the table to breakfast companions. "Look at the
front page."
On the front is a picture of Ayeka, Sasami, and Nobuyuki.
The headline says, "Notorious Criminal Trio captured.
Trial date set for two weeks. Guilty verdict and capital
punishment expected."
Tenchi's face takes on a thoughtful expression. "Two weeks,
that gives us quite a little breathing room to think of a
good plan to get them out."
"Yes, it does." agrees Kiyone.
The two of them deliberately avoid looking at each other
while Mihoshi is around, fearful that they might....well,
you know! However, their hands are still clasped tightly
together.
Just then, a very nondescript looking person wearing the
neutral-colored garb of a palace bureaucrat sits down in
the seat next to Mihoshi. Mustering the most polite
expression she can, Kiyone says, "Um, excuse me, Sir, but
this is a private table. Reserved for--"
"A high school kid and two Galaxy Police detectives?"
says the man. He doesn't look at all familiar to them, but
they all recognize the voice.
"Kyoto! What are you doing here?!" hisses Tenchi.
"Pretty much the same thing you are. Planning how to get
our friends out of jail."
While Kiyone and Tenchi bristle at this guys calling of
their friends his friends they figure they can use all the
help they can get.
Tenchi nods, "Alright, what do you have to contribute?"
Kyoto grins, "What do you mean, what do I have to
contribute? I can shift form and shape at will! I could
disguise myself as anybody and get into that prison and get
them out! What you guys need to do is get transportation
ready and run interference."
"You mean we're being reduced to mere diversions?!"
snaps Kiyone, rather pissed off at being considered
a mere bit player.
"As much as I wish I could hand you a starring role, my
dear, this is hardly the time or place to be worrying
about what might look good on your resume," shoots back
Kyoto with equal coldness.
Just then they see the expression on Mihoshi's face, one of
amazement and terror.
They follow her gaze to see.... themselves walking into the
room!
Naturally, there are subtle differences.
This universe's President Mihoshi is dressed in a smartly
tailored business suit and has a pair of tinted spectacles
perched on her nose. Underneath her arm she is carrying
a thick leather binder.
Kiyone is wearing the full dress uniform of a Director
General of Galaxy Police, complete with full decoration
jacket and skirt.
Tenchi is dressed in a black suit with a pair of black,
Ray-Ban sunglasses in front of his eyes. Plugged into his
right ear is a small earphone whose cord runs down the back
of his neck and into the jacket. A diminutive name tag
clipped to his jacket's left breast pocket flap denotes
his position as the Chief of the Federal Intelligence
and Investigation Authority (the F.I.I.A.), and the bulge
of a pistol is visible under his arm. He looks like a
typical Secret Service Agent from Earth.
All three of them seem to be rather young to have obtained
their current positions, yet it is known throughout
this universe that they are the very best at what they do.
Kyoto takes his first sip and regrettably his last sip of
an iced cappuccino. "...But, this time I think I'll run
interference, while you guys make the escape. I'll meet you
guys at this address in two hours."
He hands them the address of a local shopping center.
Before their very eyes, and yet, quite unobtrusively,
he shifts form and transforms himself into....himself,
only in full royal regalia as Crown Prince Kyoto, heir to
the throne of Jurai. "Madame President! Madame President!
Police Chief Kiyone, Security Chief Tenchi, can I speak
to you here for a second?"
Everyone in the room is shocked as they see the heir and
prince suddenly appearing out of seemingly nowhere.
Tenchi, Kiyone, and Mihoshi quickly slip through the door
while their counterparts of this universe are talking.
Kiyone was the last to leave the room and for a brief
second she caught the eye of the other Kiyone. Curious
to this sighting, the Kiyone of this universe attempts
to free herself from the conversation in order to pursue
her quarry, but finds herself unsuccessful.
Meanwhile, at the holding complex.....
"I don't know, this is all rather irregular!" The uniformed
guard at the admissions desk at the local holding facility
is noticeably disturbed about the visitors requesting
to see the newest arrivals. You see, they are two
powerful-looking men, dressed in ancient Juraian warrior
garb. One has long, dark purple-blue hair and a beard;
the other reddish hair in a complicated arrangement
atop his head. Both of them are carrying nasty-looking
fighting pikes.
Blue Hair says, "But we really must see them! It's a matter
of life and death!"
"And, who are you?" asks the official, gathering a little
bit more courage. Red Hair says, "We are--"
"Their attorneys!" interrupts Blue Hair. "Yes, that's
right, we are their attorneys!"
"And can I see some I.D, like your bar association
card?" asks the official, putting more sarcasm than
necessary into the voice.
"Of course." The two men--who we know to be Azaka and
Kamidake--slide their identification across the counter.
The guard finds nothing strange about Kamidake's,
but Azaka's--"You were a black Marine in 1968?!?!"
Azaka goes pale. "Uh, well, y'see, that belong to a good
friend of mine, died in the war, only thing left of
him...." He fumbles around in his pocket and produces
two other items. "I believe these are what you want to
see." The guard looks down at Azaka's bar card and--"What
is this?!"
Kamidake shrugs. "What, never seen a five hundred Jurai
bill before?"
Evidently not, for the guard looks like he's about to go
into cardiac arrest. After a long few moments, he pockets
the bill and pushes the bar card back across the counter.
He hits a key and the inner door swings open. "Twenty
minutes, no more."
The two Guardians walk quickly down the corridor, only to
find that they've been beaten to the draw. Prince Kyoto
is already in the cell, with two gorgeous women, one with
long blue hair and the other with long red hair--this
universe's Azaka and Kamidake.
Azaka, in a tiny little French maid's outfit, has Nobuyuki
pinned on the floor in a very compromising position.
He couldn't move if he wanted to (and he doesn't!).
Kamidake, in a long trenchcoat, has gently sedated Sasami,
who is stretched out on the couch. For his part, Prince
Kyoto is attempting to seduce Ayeka. He's not having much
luck.
"....But it would be such a small sacrifice! For your life,
for your freedom, for the lives of your husband and
daughter....It's not so much to give up, why do you insist
on denying me?" He is standing right behind her, has
himself pressed up against her, is reaching between her
legs with one hand and roughly cupping a breast in the
other.
"Uh, excuse us?" Everyone turns to see the two knights
in the doorway. Kyoto suddenly realizes what his position
looks like and roughly pushes Ayeka away. "I gave specific
orders to be undisturbed!"
The two knights arch their eyebrows. "We can see why."
Kyoto's face flushes with horror. "No, no, that's no it at
all! I was....merely....imploring this hardened criminal
to....to.... to plead guilty! Yes, to plead guilty! For the
sake of her family and her soul!"
Kamidake snorts. "Looked more like an attempted rape to
me....your highness."
Ayeka's face brightens at the sudden appearance of her
guardians. "Azaka! Kamidake!" She rushes to the nearest
one--Azaka--and clutches him tightly. "Oh, thank God for
the both of you."
The girls Azaka and Kamidake look rather confused. Kyoto
just looks pissed.
"I will not allow any more interruptions! You two leave!
Now."
Another figure steps through the open doorway, a
nondescript individual in a FedEx uniform steps through.
"FedEx, gotta package for some guy named.... Prince Kyoto
or somethin'."
Prince Kyoto draws himself up to his full height. "I am
Crown Prince Kyoto of the Jurai Royal Family, heir to the
throne of the universe's most powerful planet. You have
something for me, vermin?"
"Yeah, right here." A moment later, the prince finds
himself staring down the barrel of a GP-issue laser pistol,
the larger, more powerful caliber that Kiyone carries.
"Okay, princy-boy, just stand there while my friends and I
leave." The FedEx man motions to Kamidake, who steps over
to the couch and picks up the still-sleeping Sasami. Azaka,
after Ayeka has released him, pries the female Azaka off of
Nobuyuki and drags him to his feet. They and Ayeka file out
of the room, even Nobuyuki, who can't understand why he's
being dragged away from such a great girl....
Once his friends have left, the FedEx guy aims his gun at
the prince. "Now, buddy, if I were you, I'd forget I was
ever here, capisce? This would not look good in the papers,
now, would it?" Prince Kyoto can do little but nod,
dumbfounded. The FedEx guy leaves the room--and the
prince's eyes bug out a moment later as his own head
appears in the doorway, grinning. "Oh, and by the way,
princy, your wife is one great piece of tail. Yum, yum!"
The head disappears. That had snapped the prince out of his
shock. Roaring, he rips his own laser out of his jacket
and rushes out of the room and into the corridor.
Meanwhile, Tenchi and Kiyone have entered the lobby. Both
of them are dressed in midnight-black business suits (the
only difference is, she's wearing a skirt) and white
button-down shirts with black ties. Kiyone's Ray-Bans
are pushed up on her forehead, while Tenchi has his tinted
aviators down over his eyes and a scowl on his face. Kiyone
produces identification. "Agent Kumi, F.I.I.A. This is
Agent Takeshi. We're here to escort Ayeka and her family
to the secure facility at the spaceport."
The clerk/guard is flipping through his records. "Uh, I
don't see any records of--"
"Of course you don't, idiot!" snarls Tenchi, doing a
passable imitation of the brutish G-man. "This relocation
is classified up the yin-yang. D'ya think that you would
have been forwarded records of it?!"
The guard wilts under this harshness. "Alright, Agents,
but you'll have to wait. You see--" He stops as Kiyone
levels her large pistol in his face. Tenchi has borrowed
Mihoshi's snub-nosed blaster, and he has it out now. "Take
us to them now, or--"
The inner doors burst open. First out is Kamidake, running
as fast he can and still carry Sasami safely. Next is
Azaka, dragging the still-protesting Nobuyuki with him.
Ayeka quickly follows, holding up her skirt enough to
really run. Kyoto, dressed like his royal counterpart,
is last man out, still firing his laser down the hall. He
turns to the guard. "Quick, close the doors! A dangerous
criminal has escaped; I can barely hold him off!"
"Y-yes, your highness!" cries the guard, hitting the
closedown switch. The giant blast door slaps down,
effectively sealing the "dangerous criminal" in. Kyoto
shakes the guard's hand. "Thank you, Lieutenant, you will
be rewarded. These agents and I will take over now."
Waiting outside is a parked hovervan, with Mihoshi at the
wheel (she really is a good driver). She hops out and helps
everyone in, then slides back behind the wheel.
Kiyone drops into Tenchi's lap--the van is too crowded
for anything else--and looks at Mihoshi. "Program the
autopilot for the spaceport, Mihoshi."
"Which file?" the blonde detective inquires.
"It should be listed under 'spaceport1.apt'."
Kiyone curls up against Tenchi, and draws his arms around
her. Somehow, both of them are unaware of Ayeka's scathing
glare. The hovervan starts to move, and she closes her
eyes, feeling strangely satisfied.
That feeling lasts for a few blocks, until she hears
Mihoshi whimpering. Tenchi's reassuring voice asks, "What
is it, Mihoshi?" Kiyone snaps into consciousness
as Mihoshi wails, "Roadblock!"
Mihoshi is right. Ahead of them is a blockade consisting
of a half-dozen squad cars, a couple of armed SWAT vans,
and maybe thirty GP officers, all training their weapons
on the approaching van.
"How the hell did this happen?" asks Tenchi, his eyes the
size of satellite dishes.
Kiyone reluctantly rises from his lap and climbs into the
shotgun slot next to Mihoshi. Her eyes are also large.
"Oh lord, look who's in charge."
Tenchi and Mihoshi follow her outstretched finger to
see.....the other Kiyone! Dressed in a regular duty
uniform, the Chief of the Galaxy Police raises a megaphone.
"Attention van, cut your engines and pull over now. If you
do not comply we will be forced to open fire on you."
"What's up?" Tenchi and Kiyone turn to look at Kyoto, who
is staring out the window with a blank expression.
Tenchi sighs points out the windshield. "That's what's
up. They've thrown up a fricking roadblock."
Kiyone shakes her head. "I don't know how they knew,
but...." She sighs, and Tenchi rests a reassuring hand on
her shoulder.
They look up at Kyoto to see him looking a little sheepish.
They don't know what surprises them more, that he has such
an expression or that he's capable of wearing one. "What
is it?"
Kyoto speaks in a small voice. "Do you guys recall the
'dangerous criminal' routine in the holding facility?"
When they nod, he sighs. "The thing is, I had the
guard....sorta, kinda, lock the other Kyoto in there."
Tenchi groans. "Oh, great. And now he's sicced the GPs on
us. What now?"
"Don't worry," reassures Kyoto. As they glare up at him he
explains. "Kiyone, does this heap have a top hatch?"
Kiyone nods, and he wipes the sweat from his brow. "Okay,
this is all gonna hinge on Washu's expertise as a mechanic.
He pulls a cell-phone-like device from his pocket, flips
it open, and taps in a number. "Washu, you better have that
engine fixed!"
"Barely!" she snaps back, her voice sounding slightly
tinny through the speaker.
"Okay, then, bring 'er down, home in on this signal."
He hits another switch on the phone and repockets it. A
moment later it rings again. He flips it open, annoyed.
"What now?"
"The ship won't respond!!" Washu yells.
"What?! That's impossible, it should be--" Suddenly his
face falls. "Oh, hell,...."
"Now what!" asks an exasperated Kiyone.
"I....accidentally....brought....the
control key....with me?"
Tenchi looks up at the ceiling. "And what are we gonna do
now?"
"Relax. I always have a plan 'B'." Kyoto heads back to the
aforementioned topside hatch and climbs up the ladder,
throwing the hatch open. Steadying himself as much as he
can, he draws his sword Edgatho and cries out at the top of
his lungs, "Come to me, my Chisako!"
The sky above them starts to darken, as if the capital
was in for a storm. Then, with a loud sound like a sonic
boom, the mighty station drops into the atmosphere,
the five outer saucers spinning slowly. The GPs--including
their Director General--scream and run for cover, although
a few brave--or suicidal--souls fire their popguns up at
the looming behemoth. Chisako comes to a rest several
dozen meters above their heads, the central hub hanging
right above the van. A sparkling column of light manifests
itself where Kyoto is standing. As it envelops him and he
fades away, he yells, "Come on, hurry up, this won't last
forever!"
Ayeka is pushed through first, forestalling any complaining
from her. Kamidake, still holding Sasami, steps through
next, followed by Azaka, and then Nobuyuki, who has finally
stopped complaining, and then Mihoshi, who had long since
stopped the van and climbed out of the driver's seat.
Finally Tenchi and Kiyone, hand in hand, step into the beam
and disappear.
When they reappear, they are standing on Chisako's bridge.
Kamidake has settled Sasami, now awake but still weary,
in a chair, and Ryo-ohki scampers up and jumps into her
lap. "Mow, meow, meow!" Ryoko and Ayeka are openly glaring
at Kiyone, but there is no time for petty bickering
now.
Tenchi turns to Kyoto. "Well, Kyoto, let's get outta here."
"Consider it done. In fact, I--" He cuts himself of with
an Anoponese curse. "Washu, I thought you said you fixed
this!"
"I thought I did!" Washu shoots back. "Do you know how many
systems I had to jury-rig to--whoa!!!! What the hell?!"
She and everyone else had been thrown roughly up into the
air and slammed back down--hard. Kyoto staggers to his feet
and makes his way back to his console. "Aggh! We're losing
altitude! The engines have given out completely!"
"What!!!" screams Tenchi. Kiyone is clinging
tightly to him. A moment later Sasami
joins her, burying her face in Tenchi's stomach.
"Tenchi, I'm scared!"
He wraps his free arm around her. "Shh, shh, don't worry
Sasami, it's gonna be alright, it's gonna be alright...."
Tenchi brings his eyes up to meet Kiyone's, and she smiles
sadly. If he had said something sooner....maybe....I'm
sorry, Kiyone, he thinks. I wish I'd told you sooner.
I....oh, darling, I'm so sorry....
Suddenly in his mind he hears her voice say, Oh, my Tenchi,
at least we had this time together. It's all right, love,
it's all right....Sasami would have made a great daughter,
huh?
Tenchi finds himself smiling at Kiyone. He draws both her
and Sasami as tightly to him as he can. And you would have
made a wonderful mother....and wi--
The thought is cut off as he hears Sasami yell out,
"Ryo-ohki, don't eat that!" A moment later, a sizzling
sound and Ryo-ohki meow-screaming echoes through the
compartment. "Mi-ya...ow..."
Kyoto shakes his head ruefully. "I knew I should have
replaced those transcapacitors back whe--oh my lord, that's
it! Washu, get over to the far wall and pull out a box
marked 'Emergency Gear'."
Washu returns a moment later with the box. "Okay, whatcha
gonna do with it?"
"Just watch." He pulls the aforementioned
transcapacitor--which does look like a carrot--out
of its slot and replaces it with a conductor cable. He then
hooks the other end of the cable to the transcapacitor
and dangles the device in front of Ryo-ohki. "Here, girl,
wanna bite?"
Ryo-ohki, not having learned from the last experience,
jumps up, clamps her teeth down on the transcapacitor.
Instead of taking the brunt of the electrical shock herself
this time, however, she channels most of it into the
transcapacitor and into the cable and into the computer.
The lights suddenly snap back on and they feel Chisako
literally skidding to a stop a mere hundred meters above
the Palace.
"We've got an energy surge!" yells Washu. "I don't know how
long it'll last for, but we got it now!"
"Full thrusters, hit FTL once we clear the atmosphere,"
directs Kyoto.
"You got it!" Washu taps in the directions, and Chisako
shoots up through the atmosphere. Once in space, the
translight drives kick in and they're on their way once
more.
"Ahhh..." Tenchi slumps in relief. "That was too close."
Kiyone looks up at him, smiling again. "We got out of it,
didn't we?"
Tenchi nods and smiles back. "Yeah, we did."
Sasami looks back and forth between the two of them. "Are
you two boyfriend and girlfriend now?"
They both burst out laughing, and look at each other. After
a moment. Kiyone leans up and kisses Tenchi on the cheek;
he grins sheepishly. "Yeah, Sasami, we are."
Sasami grins broadly. "Can I be the flower girl at your
wedding?"
Before either of them can answer, Ryoko is suddenly in
their face. "Hey, hey, hey, what's goin' on here?! Tenchi,
you're not seri--"
"Yes, I am," says Tenchi firmly. "I'm sorry if this hurts
you, but Kiyone and I...."
"....we love each other," finishes Kiyone.
Mihoshi starts to cry. "I'm so happy!"
Kyoto groans. "Great, this is just what we need." He leers
at Ryoko. "Come on over and sit in Santa's lap, baby, lemme
give you some candy."
Ayeka huffs and leaves the room. Sasami is still grinning.
"Kiyone and Tenchi sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g,...."
THE END