Yosh! It's me again. Just decided to bother you all with this..
relativly short piece I've been working on. As always, C&C is welcomed,
flames blatenly ignored, and Disclaimers wanted: Apply here, here,
and                        Way o'er here in the back.
    Not my Characters, no, not a one. Probably not even an original
idea, dependin' on what's been written during my two year absence from
the FFML. I do hope you enjoy, an d I do hope I didn't get too OOC.
             -JJ

JJ Corley Presents:
A Ludicrous Configuration! Production
Ranma 1/2 & Tenchi Muyo!:
 The Chaos Cronicles
  Chapter 1:
 A Time for Change

 Ranma-chan sighed as she looked out at the backyard of a house she
didn't remember living in. "it's been so long.." She whispered quietly.

 "What is wrong, my son?" Asked Nodoka as she came into the dining room,
laden with tea and cookies. Ranma turned to gaze at her mother. Nodoka
Saotome was beautiful. How Genma was able to gain her as his wife was
beyond Ranma's comprehention, and Nodoka was lothe to explain.

 "I'm just thinking." Ranma-chan voiced, still looking at her mother. It
was their sixth secret meeting; with Genma being such a coward, Ranma
had been forced to find out where his mother lived on his own. Then he
had introduced himself. The first meeting was very trying, and Ranma had
thought he had given up his life as soon as he had shown her his curse;
but Nodoka was quick to assure him that it was not so. She recalled her
mother's words, 'I can not hold you to your father's promise of Seppuku
because you have proven to be three times the man I had hoped you to
become: First, by putting up with the $h^# your father has pulled.
Second, by coming here without your father's permission; and Third, for
revealing to me that which would null your manlyness and cost you your
life in its stead, when you could have hidden it from me. Truely, you
are a man amoung men.'

 ~Yeah, the only man amoung men who can be a woman too.~ Ranma mused
bitterly. Another arguement over his curse had sent him here, via
Tendouu Akane's Mallet Express. He had landed head first into the barrel
of rain water Nodoka kept for watering her flowers. Ranma had to admit,
it was a good, money saving idea; and also one which worked
exceptionally well in Nermia..

 "..oun to be wed.. Ranma?"

 Ranma shook herself out of her reverie. "What? I'm sorry mom, I was out
of it for a moment."

 "So it would seem. As I was saying, I believe it is too early for you
to be married, and for Soun to be wedding you against your will to one
of his daughters.. Even if it is a matter of Family hono.." Nodoka
trailed off, and a thoughtful gleam entered her eyes.

 "Mom? You ok?"

 Nodoka smiled. "Tell me truthfully, Ranma: Do you have feelings for, or
would you want to wed, Tendouu Akane?"

 Ranma blinked. "Well.. *Sigh* If you had asked me that about five
months ago, I would have said yes.. But now..."

 "But now..?"

 Ranma did some quick soul searching. "I loved her, mom.. But, well..
We've grown apart. I just can't stand her constantly beating me
everytime something she does goes wrong. And I hate how she insults me
every time she thinks I did something she doesn't like! She never gives
me the benefit of a doubt! She always jumps to conclusions! Then there's
the fact that she's submitted me to at least one hundred different forms
of tourture, both phisical and biological!" Ranma-chan rubbed her cheek
indignatnly, "AnD tHaT _DaMn_ mAlLeT Is dRiViNg Me nUtS!!" Ranma would
have been seething from the gills at this point, except she didn't have
any; the author blatently ignored this and used the expression anyway.

 "..."

 Ranma-chan held her breath for a few seconds, then exhaled and relaxed.
"I'm sorry mom. I didn't mean to get so angry."

 Nodoka smiled. "Don't worry, my son. I may have a solution for you. Let
me make a call."

*

 Yosho was sitting in the Masaki Shrine, taking his time on a prayer
strip. Then the phone rang.

 "Hummn..? I wonder who that could be?" The old man rose to his feet and
picked up the reciever. "Moshi-moshi."

 "Hello, Father."

 "Ahh.. Nodoka-chan.. It's been a long time.."

*

 "Arigato, Otousan. I shall see what my son thinks. I thank you. Good
bye." Nodoka hung up and smiled.

 Ranma-chan finished off her fourth cookie. ~Mom was on the phone for a
while.. Wonder what that was about..?~

 Nodoka seated herself in front of her son. "Ranma, what would you do to
get out of your engagement to Akane?"

 "At this point.. Anything"

 "Even commit Seppuku?"

 Ranma shuddered. "If it came down to it.. yes, even commit Seppuku."

 At this, Nodoka knew Ranma would listen to what she would say next.
"Would you renounce your name?"

 Ranma paused. "Renounce my name?"

 Nodoka nodded as she explained, "Even though I do not approve of your
father's past actions, he is still the head of the family. You are still
bound by the vow, since you are Saotome. If the Saotome line were to end
with you, then there would be no reason for Soun Tendouu to force the
issue, because you will no longer be associated with that idiot, Genma."

 "W-What do you mean?"

 "Ranma, My parents died just before you were born. Two years after
that, my brother's wife also died. My only extended family other than
you and your father, are my brother and my father-in-law."

 "Mom, I.. I didn't know.."

 Nodoka nodded. "The reason I brought this up is this: The head of my
family's household is my father-in-law."

 "Is that who you called 'Father' on the phone?"

 "Yes. I have talked to my father-in-law, and you are free to use my
maden name of Masaki. Both my father-in-law and my parents were quite
against my marriage to that fool, Genma, and I see now that they were
right. In fact, the only good thing that ever came from him was you. But
Genma has used you for his own ends with no regards for your opinions,
feelings or welfare. I rather suspect that he arranged the marriage with
the Tendous so that he could live off the dojo. With your curse and the
threat of Seppuku, I feel that he had no intention of ever contacting
me. I thank the powers that be for allowing me to meet my son and for
showing me how big a fool that man truly is. If he had wanted all those
arranged engagements you told me about, he should have come home to make
certain there were children to uphold them!"

 Ranma nodded, as she too had come to that conclusion before. Genma had
never worked for anything in his life. Not if he could use her to get
something for free. The multiple engagements were proof of that.
Although she was not totally uncomfortable with losing the Saotome name,
she had always prided herself on being Ranma Saotome.

 "I want you to take my family name and move to my brother's and
father-in-law's house in Okayama."

 "Mom, I.." Ranma started.

 Nodoka held up a hand and motioned for him to listen. "Do not worry
about my well-being. I am quite well off. The Masaki family is very
wealthy, as it is descended from a noble samurai line. That is one of
the reasons that I think Genma married me. My parents opposed the match,
but I assured them that I would not let Genma get his hands on any of my
fortune. That is why I chose to live simply. I contacted my
father-in-law and told him of what has happened and my plans. He has
agreed to let you take up the Masaki name and is even more than willing
to name you as an heir. You will no longer be Ranma Saotome. Your new
name will be Ranma Masaki. However, I will not force you to do this.
Your life has been controlled by others long enough. I will let you make
your own decisions."

 Ranma-chan was silent for a moment. Then a single tear ran down her
cheek. "But, mom, I don't want to lose you after finding you again!!"

 Nodoka smiled wanly and pulled her son into an embrace. "I know. I feel
the same. But, I also feel it best for you to escape from this
situation. And this is an honorable way out."

 Ranma nodded. "I'll do it. Heck, I've done it already. But.. I think
that I should at least ATTEMPT to tie up a few lose ends first."

 "Of course."

*

 Ranma-kun stood outside the gates of the Tendou Dojo. His mind was set,
his commitment firm, his mother behind him. "Wait here untill you get
the signal to come in.

 Nodoka nodded. "Do you remember what to say?"

 Ranma smiled. "I think so. You had me memorize the script twice."

 Nodoka nodded. "Good luck, my son."

 With that, he entered the Tendou-kan. Kasumi met him at the front door.
"Hello, Ranma! Have you eaten?"

 "Yeah, thanks Kasumi. Is everyone here?"

 "I believe so.. why?"

 Ranma smirked. "I have an announcement to make." He entered the living
room to find Genma and Soun playing Shogi. Genma was in Panda form.
Nabiki was slouched against the table, reading a Manga. She was also
drinking a glass of hot tea. Not anymore.

 The cup made a graceful 360 in mid air after connecting with
Genma/Panda's skull, then dumped its contents on the fuzzy animal.
Instant Irate Idiot. "RanMa! What is the meaning of this?!"

 "Si'ddown Genma. I got a anouncement of sorts ta make." Noticing he had
even Nabiki's attention, he called "Akane! Kasumi! Could you come in
here, please?"

 Kasumi came in, followed by Akane, who had been in her room upstairs.
Upon seeing Ranma, Akane scowled.

 "Save it for later, 'Kane."

 Everyone blinked. Ranma never addresed Akane like that. Soun finally
spoke up.

 "Well, we are here. What is is you wished to say?"

 "Tendou-dono," Ranma said, speeking to Soun, "I say this with the
utmost respect: I thank you for your patience and your hospitality."

 Soun, taken back by Ranma's use of an honorific, could only nod. Ranma
continued.

 "However.. I am unable to fulfill the vow set by Genma and yourself. I
can not and will not marry any of your daughters."

 Soun blinked. This was a common thing for Akane to say in anger, but
Ranma? He was calm, collected, and waiting for a reply. Soun gave it.
"Why do you wish to bring dishonor to your family by not keeping with
the vow your father and I both took? What is wrong with my daughters,
that you want none of them to be your bride?"

 Ranma Sighed. ~At least he hasn't broken into crying yet...~
"Tendou-dono.. I find nothing wrong with your daughters. Each is smart,
beautiful, strong, and I am sure they will gain alliances that shall
only serve to strenthen the Tendou family. However, I, personally, am
not fit for them. I believe this has been proven by not only my actions,
but your daughters actions as well." Ranma looked at Akane. She
squrimed. He looked at Nabiki. She raised an eyebrow. He looked at
Kasumi. She met his gaze and nodded. "None of them wish to marry me, and
I do not wish to marry any of them."

 Soun shook his head sadly. "Be that as it may, Saotome-kun, you must
marry one of them. The vow states that a Saotome must wed a Tendou, and
carry on the school of Anything Goes Martial Arts."

 Ranma smiled. "Then again, I state that I can not personally fulfill
the vow."

 Genma decided that it would be a good time to be an ass. "What do you
mean, boy? You can not be exempt from the vow! You are Saotome! There is
no escape! Resistance is futile! You shall be acclimated!"

 Ranma shook his head. He handed his father a small slip of paper with
the exact instructions to read it after he was finished. He then opened
the door to the porch and walked out into the yard. Everyone watched
Ranma, except Genma, who was still puzzling over the slip of paper he
held. Ranma cupped his hand to his mouth and yelled as loud as possible.

 "Listen up! I, Ranma Saotome, hereby RENOUNCE MY FAMILY NAME!! And,
furthermore, under permission of the head of its clan, have taken the
name of Masaki!"

 Of course Genma, never being one to heed instructions, had read the
slip of paper during Ranma's anoucement. His anger was cut short by the
short message.

 Nodoka is outside.

 A very loud 'EEEEEEEEEP!' followed by an equally loud 'HIDE MEEEEEE!!'
erupted from Genma. He turned, twisted, and sought a place to crawl
into, only to find himself looking at the point of a Katana.

 Nodoka smiled serenly. "Hello dear. Its been a long time."

 Ranma shook his head at his father, who was begging for his life, and
at the Tendou's, who were looking at him in shock. "And thus, it is
written.." He said softly. Soun, realizing that a union between his
family and his best friend's was now impossible, did as expected. He
started bawling.

 Akane broke the semi-relitave silence first. "You don't love me, do
you..?"

 "I did, but not anymore. I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you."

 "Well.. You did. Deeply."

 "I tried to make it work. But a relationship, like a friendship, is
fueled by love, and needs two people to keep it going. We never quite
had that down. We were too busy fighting to let each other know how we
felt. Now, it's too late."

 Akane nodded and began to cry. She was the reason he had loved her; but
she was also the reason his love had been lost.

 Soun finally managed to get something past his lips. "Renounce..?"

 "Yes, Tendouu-san. I am no longer a Saotome. You can't hold me to your
vow any longer."

 "WAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAA!!!"

 Nabiki swore a soft curse and hastily stalked upstairs. Ranma watched
her go, then turned to Kasumi. "What can I say? You've been  a sister to
me, and the closest thing I had to a mother for a long time."

 "Ranma-kun.. I care for you as a brother. Though you will never be my
in-law now, If you ever need to talk, I'm here for you. I'll always be
here for you, Ranma-kun.."

 Ranma nodded as Kasumi got up from her position on the floor next to
Akane, and stood in front of him. The two embraced, and Kasumi gave him
a quick kiss on the cheek. "Good luck in your new life, Masaki-kun."

 "Thank you Kasumi."

 Kasumi withdrew to her room, passing Nabiki, who was coming back down
the stairs with his backpack.

 "Here." She offered. Ranma hesitantly excepted. "I went ahead and
packed your room up for you. Everything that didn't scream 'Genma' is in
the bag. That and a thirty persent commision of what I made off those
photos of you.."

 "Thanks, Nabiki. This means a lot."

 Nabiki embraced him, and kissed him on the lips. "we could have had
something together. nothing seems to work out right for either of us,
though.." She whispered in his ear.

 "At least you wern't engaged to five different guys." He whispered
back. Nabiki laughed at Ranma. "Write a book about my time here. You'll
make a fortune."

 "Now there's an idea." She smiled. "I'm gonna miss ya, you silly,
muscle brained, Yen factory you."

 "Same goes to you, oh Ice Queen, ruler of all mercenaries, and colletor
of all ideas which are profitable."

 Nabiki smiled. "If you stay like this, you'll have the girls tripping
all over you. Be careful of the falling cleavage. I hear it can be
deadly." And with that, Nabiki bounded back up the stairs.

 Ranma shook his head, then looked at the youngest Tendou daughter. She
stood before him, wiping her tears away. "Ranma.. I'm sorry."

 "It's not your fault Akane. In some other place, universe, Fan-Fic, we
did it right, and are probably having kids. But here.. It was a no go."

 She nodded, then did the unexpected. She kissed him, full on. It was
one of those kisses which are indended to clean out most of your small
intestine in twelve seconds. It would make a vaccume envious.. Hell, it
was one of those kisses the Coneheads would die to be able to preform.
She finally broke it, and whispered, "goodbye, Ranma."

 "Goodbye, Akane."

 Soun watched this strange prosession in awe.. Well, as much awe as a
man in tears can watch something in.. Then it came his turn to say
goodbye to the young man who had become a staple in his life. As he
stood in front of Ranma, all Ranma could think was ~If he kisses me, I'm
gonna barrow Akane's mallet and whap him a good one..~

 He was relieved to find Soun only extending his hand. After a firm
shake. The two men nodded, and Ranma turned to go.

 "You ready, mom?"

 Nodoka scowled at Genma -who was still groveling for his life- one last
time. "Let's go, Ranma. I have no further business here at the moment."
As mother and son walked out the door, Nodoka called back to Genma: "I'm
filing for divorce."

 If the poor man said anything, neither of them heard, or would have
cared to have heard, it.

 As he shut the gate, Ranma took one final look at the place he had
called home for over a year. "I am free.."

 He smiled a sad smile, and left without looking back.

*

 Nodoka spoke first. "Do you regret your desision?"

 "No." Ranma said as he shook his head. "I'm glad it's over. The next
part, however.."

 "Ah, yes.. That Shampoo girl. What are you going to do?"

 Ranma sighed as he and his mother began the walk to the Nekohanten. "I
think I know of a way.. But it will make me look bad." He sighed again.
"Not that I care any; I'm not planning on coming back here."

 Nodoka nodded as they neared the Cat Cafe. Ranma motioned for his
mother to stay outside, and gave her his bag. He entered, causiously,
expecting a glomp and a 'Woto Airen!'. He got neither.

 Mousse looked up from the cash register. He had his glasses on, so he
was able to see who came in. "Oh, it's you, Saotome."

 Ranma bristled. "Is Cologne here? I need to talk to her."

 Mousse shrugged. "No. You and me are the only ones here. Cologne's out
shopping and Shampoo went to make a delivery."

 "Ah. And it's not Saotome anymore, Mousse. I renounced my name to get
out of the engagement. It's Masaki now."

 The Chinese boy frowned. "So you've come here to take away my Shampoo,
have you? I'll never allow it!" Mousse pulled several katanas out of his
sleeves, and advanced on Ranma. Ranma held out his hands and backed up.

 "Then help me think of a way to get out of marryin' Shampoo! You know I
don't want to marry her!"

 Mousse stopped his advance and put away his weapons. "You beat her, she
has to marry you. There is no way out."

 "I beat her on accident the second time! She was tryin' to hit Akane
with her bonbarri! I kicked it out of her hand and it hit her in the
head! When she woke up, she was all over me, has been ever since! I
don't want her, Mousse! I didn't beat her on purpose!"

 "Then my great-grandaughter has no claim on you and we have been here
wasting our time!"

 Ranma and Mousse both turned towards the kitchen. Cologne was staffing
there, looking annoyed. "Why didn't you tell me this sooner?"

 "I thought Shampoo told you when she went back to China.."

 "No. All She said was that you had beaten her in combat. Since I see
this was not the case, then you shall just have to fight her again."

 Ranma shook his head. "No. I do not want Shampoo as my wife. I refuse."

 Cologne scoweled. "Then, since I can not force you, You are free from
the Amazon Marriage Law."

 Ranma and Mousse both nearly jumped in excitement.

 "I'm not engaged to Shampoo!" Ranma exclaimed.

 "You're not engaged to Shampoo!" Mousse cried in joy.

 "Quit it, Both of you. Mousse, go and pack your bags, we're leaving for
China. As for you," She whirled on Ranma and smacked him on the head wih
her stave, "Get out of here!"

 Ranma was quick to oblige.

 Outside, his mother handed him his bag and smiled. "That was quick."

 "Heh. Just be glad Shampoo wasn't there.. I didn't expect to be exempt
form that damn law.. I guess I should have told Cologne what happened to
begin with.." Ranma explaned what had occured inside of the Nekohanten
as they headed for Ukkyou's.

 "Hummn.. But, I do not understand. Why did Cologne say she could not
force you into a duel?"

 "Well, I beat her in combat. If she had wanted to force me into
fighting Shampoo again, she would have had to beat me. She can't, so I
win by default." Ranma shrugged and opened the door of Ucchan's
Okonomiyaki Shop for his mother. She went inside and Ranma followed.

 Ukkyou was in a lamentable mood. First that hussy Shampoo had shown up,
then Kodachi arrived and scared her coustomers away. Thus Mass Violence
had ensued. And ensued, and ensued, and ensued. There was little left of
Ucchan's Okonomiyaki-ya. The tables were scattered and broken, chairs
were streun every which way, the main griddle was a mess.. and the south
window had a distintive, Ukkyou shaped hole in it.

 Ukkyou surveyed the view, taking in the destruction of her livilyhood.
"This just isn't fair!" She whailed, beggining to cry.

 Ranma was floored, literally. As soon as he was past the door, he had
suffered a massive facefalt. Nodoka blinked twice, making that really
cool *Squeegy-Squeegy* sound. That was when they heard Ukkyou say it
wasn't fair. Ranma quickly recovered and went to where the
Okonomiyaki-style martial artist was kneeling.

 "Ucchan.. What happened? You ok?"

 "Yeah, Ranchan.. I've seen better days though.." Ukkyou looked up at
Ranma, the first tears beggining to fall. She quickly wiped them away
and stood up to face her fiancee. "Shampoo an' Kodachi blew threw here,
hon.. And left a nasty mess for me, too. Oh! If it weren't for you bein'
here, Ranchan, I'd just leave, and sick my lawer on 'em.."

 "Pack your bags.." Nodoka said from behind them. Ukkyou turned around.

 "Oh, I'm sorry.. The resturaunts closed.. If you could come back
tomarrow.." Ukkyou stopped as Nodoka smiled at her. "What?"

 "Ucchan, I'd like you to meet my mom, Sao.. Err, Masaki Nodoka."

 Ukkyou blinked. It took a second for this information to sink in.
"You're.. Ranchan's Mom?"

 "Yes, I.." Nodoka would have gone on, but she suddenly found it hard to
breathe. She was the recipiant of a rather tight bear hug, which Ukkyou
was only too happy to deliver.

 "Oh! I'm so sorry!" Ukkyou said as she released Nodoka from the hug,
and held her at arms leangth. "I thought you were a coustomer! I'm Konji
Ukkyou, Ranchan's fiancee! I'm so glad to finally be able to meet you,
mom!" She smiled warmly and Nodoka laughed.

 "Well, it is a pleaseure to meet you as well, miss Konji. Unfortunatly,
this is not a time for happy news. I believe my son has something to
discuss with you."

 Ukkyou turned to Ranma, concern sketched over her features. "What is
she talking about, Ranchan..? Please, don't tell me you're leaving me!"
She ran to him, and buried her face into his shoulder as she began to
cry again. "Please don't leave me, Ranchan! You're all I've got!"

 Ranma, as usual, didn't know what to do with a distraught woman. He
made some rather pathetic gestures at his mom, and she motioned for him
to hug Ukkyou. Ranma tried to hug Ukkyou, but his arms were shaking
almost as badly as the girl in them. "Ucchan.. Please don't cry.."

 "Ranma, honey, I love you."

 Three words. Oh, how they make a man freeze and think: ~My god, what do
I do? What do I do? Ack!~

 ~Ucchan's my friend! But, she's also my fiancee.. NO! I don't feel that
way about her! I Don't! I Don't! I Don't! I Don't! I Do!~
Ranma paused. Ukkyou looked up at him.

 "You do what?" She said shakily.

 Nodoka watched as her son told his feelings to the woman he loved.

 Ranma stared into Ukkyou's brown eyes, as she stared into his grey
ones. "Ucchan.. I dunno how to say this.. You've always been there for
me when I needed you, and all I've done is ignore your feelings for me..
Because I don't know how to deal with these kinda situations.. Ah, damit
-I Love you, Ucchan.."

 Ukkyou's eyes went wide as she heard the words she had always wanted to
hear from him. Ranma leaned in for a kiss, and she met him half way.

 Nodoka smiled wanly, and calmly reminded Ranma that he had something
else rather important to tell Ukkyou.

 After they parted from their kiss, Ranma sheepishly said, "I.. Uh..
Renounced my name so I could get out of the engagement to Akane.."

 Ukkyou only smiled. "I'd still marry you, even if you didn't have a
name to give me, Ranchan!"

 "Well, I do have a name to give you, and it's Masaki." Ranma fidgeted
while Ukkyou continued to beam at him. Finally she asked what was
bothering him. "Well.. My father left you behind last time, and I don't
want a repeat mistake.. It's your choice now. I'm leaving this forsaken
town. I want you ta Come with me, Ucchan. Come with me and be my bride."

 "Just lemme pack my bags and call my lawer. Then I'll let ya take me to
any place in the world!"

 "Will Okayama work?"

 Ukkyou nodded, then seperated from their embrace. "I've got to go get
my things.. Wanna help?" Ranma nad Nodoka nodded, and with that, the
three went past the main grill and headed towards Ukkyou's  apartment.

 Nodoka nodded to her son. "It is a good match. You seem to respect her
and she seems entirely devoted to you. Your happiness may bring about
some peace and quiet in my brother's house."

 Ranma looked at his mother, a blank 'Whazzat?" expression on his face.
Nodoka smiled. "You may be reminded of your life here, the way things go
on over there.. That is, if I can believe Father.. He is quite a
character. You two should fit in fine."

 Ranma frowned. "I dunno if I should feel comforted or not.."

 Ukkyou smiled. "Belive me, mom.. Between what Ranchan and I 'ave both
seen, nothin' could be like this place.."

------------------------
    "For the idiocy of trying to harm me, a god, I demand in atonement..
One hundred and two twinkies! Oh, the soft, spongy, grease filled cake
and the creamy white filling!! Sugoi!" -Ronin Sal-Solo