Subject: [FFML][Fanfic][Ranma] Crossed Wires (Chapter 1)
From: Kent Hyam
Date: 4/2/1999, 8:17 PM
To: ffml@fanfic.com
Reply-to:
rodney.hyam@sk.sympatico.ca

This is the first fanfic I've written, so I'll be grateful for any
feedback I receive, especially if it happens to be constructive.  Anyone
interested in acting as a prereader for future chapters please send a
request by private e-mail.

Now, some information about the story itself.  For those of you
concerned with continuity it takes place sometime shortly after volume
28 of the magna.  In other words, Akari and Konatsu haven't appeared
yet, Nodoka has been introduced, but doesn't know about Ranma's curse.
The story itself was inspired by the many fanfics (some very good) in
which Ranma suddenly devises a plan to solve all his problems.  It seems
to me he'd be at least as likely to really mess things up.

Disclaimer:      The characters and situations of Ranma 1/2 are owned by
Rumiko Takahashi and are used in this fanfic without permission.  That
doesn't really surprise anyone though does it.
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Chapter 1: A Truce Between Friends
     The day wasn't going at all well for Ranma.  There were good
points, for example he got to spend time with his mother, but there was
a definite drawback to the whole situation.  It had to do with his or
rather her gender.
     "That dress makes you look much more feminine Ranko, but we really
should do something with your hair."
     "No!  I mean you really don't need to bother Auntie Saotome, I like
my hair just fine the way it is.
     Nodoka smiled gently at the young girl before her, "Nonsense
helping you is no trouble at all, and you really do need to start paying
attention to your appearance if you hope to find a good boyfriend. If
you aren't careful you'll end up becoming an old maid.  At this Nodoka's
gaze darted briefly over to Kasumi who was quietly preparing supper, a
gesture Ranma did not overlook.
     Mom thinks Kasumi is an old maid?  She's as bad as Pop and Mr.Tendo
are, I've got to find a way to get out of here.  At this, Ranma began to
search desperately  for an avenue of escape, but the only person who met
her gaze was Nabiki, who seemed to be ready to break into uncontrolled
laughter.
     I didn't expect any better from Mr. Tendo and the Panda, but I
thought Akane would try to help me.  Not that I want help from an uncute
tomboy, I mean she needs lessons in being ladylike more than I do.
She'd probably just make things worse anyway.
     With a nervous grin Ranma turned  back to her unsuspecting mother
and stammered, "I'm, uh,  really not interested in finding a boyfriend
right now. I mean that is...".  Ranma's voice trailed of as Nodoka gazed
steadily at her.
     Poor girl obviously shy, probably the lack of a mother's influence,
fortunately I can help her with that.  As Nodoka began unbraiding
Ranma's hair she said, "You might think that now, but you'll change your
mind soon enough, and you really can't afford to wait.  Why I was almost
twenty when I married and...".
     At this this point their conversation was cut off by a voice from
the entrance of the house.  "Ryoga, how nice of you to visit, are those
roses for anyone I know."
     Oh great, Ryoga's probably going to try dating Akane again, just
what I need.  Wait a sec, this is just what I need.  With that thought a
grin split Ranma's face and she darted off.
     "Well actually Kasumi, these roses are for..."
     "Me!  Come on Ryoga, I'm ready for our date.  Bye everyone I'll see
you later."
     Nodoka watched bemused as the petite redhead dragged the larger boy
away.  If she already had a boyfriend she should have just said so.

     Outside the Tendo's home Ryoga was trying to figure out what
exactly was going on, not having much luck he masked his confusion with
anger.  Tearing loose from Ranma's  grip he snarled "What do you think
your doing Ranma."  Taking a closer look at the girl beside him he
paused in confusion, she looked like Ranma but was wearing a light blue
sundress and her red hair fell loose past her shoulders.  Blinking, he
ventured uncertainly "You are Ranma aren't you?"
     "Of course I'm Ranma, if you couldn't tell maybe you should borrow
a pair of glasses from Mousse.  After all it's bad enough you being lost
all the time, if your eyes go as well you'll be really sunk.  As she
spoke Ranma evaluated the lost boy's condition.  Oh boy, angry and
confused usually he can make up his mind.  Same black T-shirt and pants
as usual, but they look a lot cleaner, must not have been lost too
long.  Hey, fresh roses I wonder how he managed that.
     Across the street an unconscious kendoist stirred slightly and
muttered something incomprehensible in what sounded suspiciously like
iambic pentameter.
     Ryoga's expression changed to a confident smirk as he replied "Heh,
I don't think I'm the one who needs glasses Ranma or maybe you're trying
to get it touch with your feminine side.  I've got to admit the new
hairstyle is a big improvement."
     "Hey I didn't want to dress like this, it's all my Pop's fault for
making that crazy promise."  snapped Ranma.
     "What did he do Ranma engage, you to another girl.  If you're
cheating on Akane again I'll make you pay," Ryoga growled.
     "It's nothing like that P-chan, before we left on a training trip
ten years ago he promised Mom that if I didn't become a man among men
we'd both commit seppuka.  Thanks to this curse I don't exactly fit
anyone's idea of a manly man now do I."
     "I think you're worrying about this to much Ranma, there's no way
your own mother would hold you to a promise that you didn't even make
yourself," he said in a pensive voice.
     "You think so do ya, well then can you explain the katana she's
always carrying around," came the bitter reply.  "Besides even if I knew
she'd forgive me I don't think I could stand to disappoint her like
this."
     "That's really rough.  I sort of know how you feel I haven't seen
my own family since I got cursed.  I swear I won't tell your mother
about your curse no matter what."
     "Thanks Ryoga, but you didn't need to promise.  Even though we're
rivals I know you'd never resort to something that underhanded."
Ranma's lips turned up in a faint smile as she continued "Look I ran out
of there before I got a chance to eat supper, and I know you've probably
missed a few meals lately, so how about stopping for a bite to eat."
     "Sure something besides instant ramen would be nice, and I don't
have anywhere else to go," Ryoga answered.
     "Great, I know this Italian place nearby.  Say you do have money
don't you."  Ranma's smile had become a bit brighter a the prospect free
food, and she wanted to make sure this wasn't premature.
     "Of course I do, but why should I pay for your food."
     "Well, Nabiki has all of my money and anyway its only fair since
you'd never be able to find the place without me."
     With that the two arch rivals walked off still bickering quietly.

     An hour later Ranma and Ryoga sat in the dimly lit restaurant
finishing their meal and engaging in an animated conversation.  It must
be admitted that in most places outside of Nerima their chosen topics
would have been considered slightly unusual.
     "Your serious, you really had to fight a master of martial arts
candle making," Ranma said from behind the hand she was using to stifle
her laughter.  "I thought martial arts tea ceremony was weird, but
you've got that beat."
     "Stop laughing Ranma, its an ancient and deadly art.  Well maybe
not exactly deadly, but it was really annoying." Ryoga settled back to
sulk offended by Ranma's mirth.
     "Come on Ryoga, I didn't mean to upset you its just nice to know
that stuff like that can happen to somebody besides me."  I never knew
how much I had in common with Ryoga, Ranma thought,  I guess neither of
us have had easy lives.
     "Well what did you think I did all the time I was lost, my life
doesn't revolve around you after all," Ryoga grumbled.  "Anyway we're
finished eating, so I guess we'd better go now."
     "Um do we have to, my Mom's probably still at the Tendo's and I
really don't want to have to deal with  her now," Ranma said sounding
faintly depressed.
     "Its still light out so I guess we could do something else, but I
don't really have any ideas of what that might be."
     "Well I heard that this movie called Death Ninja VI, is supposed to
be pretty good I think its about  martial arts or something."
     "It sounds like it might be interesting, I've never been in a movie
theater before anyway.  Lets go," said Ryoga rising to pay the bill.

     "This movie isn't very realistic Ranma, that isn't how you perform
the iron cloth technique at all," Ryoga stated between mouthfuls of
popcorn.
     "Listen kid this is just a movie, nobody can do that in real life.
So shut up or I'll kick your ass,"  a tall, broad shouldered man
threatened, as he began to stand up.
     -BUZZ-
     A yellow blur skimmed just above the mans head as he abruptly
parted company with a sizable amount of hair.  "I g-guess I could be
wrong about that," a considerably paler man quavered.  "I think I'll sit
down for a while now."
     "The way the ninja's are jumping is completely wrong too, Ranma
sniffed.  "No real martial artist would be bothered by a forty foot fall
anyway."
     "You're right about that, the whirlwind kick that Mamoru guy uses
looks like it might be useful though.  Hey, hand me some more popcorn."
     "Here help yourself   I could dodge that kick no problem though,
the specialty of the Saotome school is aerial attacks you know.  Ranma
handed over the tub of popcorn as she boasted.
      The two continued their debate on the relative merits of the
movie, drawing furtive glances from the other patrons.  Strangely
though, no one objected despite the occasionally  excessive volume.  In
fact the rest of the theater seemed strangely quiet.
     "Come on Ryoga the movies over its time to leave," Ranma said " and
my Mom has probably gone home by now so I can head back to the Tendo's."

     "That movie was pretty good, I usually don't like comedies though.
I guess I'd better try to find my campsite for the night."
     "Ah, you don't have to do that Ryoga. I bet the Tendo's would be
glad to let you sleep over."
     "You really think so?"
     "Sure, lets go.  I'd better not see P-chan around tonight if you
know what's good for you."

     The walk back to the Tendo's home was quite with  both young
martial artists deep in their own thoughts.
     Ranma's thought were surprisingly pleasant, considering how the
evening had started for him.  It was nice to just hang out with another
guy for once, I've sort of missed that. Hiroshi and Daisuke are all
right I guess, but I don't have much in common with them.  Besides if
I'd spent an evening in girl form around them they would've spent all
their time staring at my chest and drooling.  Ryoga always treats me
like a guy, it must be because he has a curse himself.
     In contrast Ryoga's thoughts took amore somber turn, and expressed
a concern he would never admit he felt.  Ranma was acting really weird
tonight, he hardly insulted me at all.  I wonder how much this thing
with his mother is affecting him.  Maybe, I'll be a bit nicer to him for
a while.  Besides, if I don't fight with Ranma I can probably spend more
time around Akane.


     The day began quietly at the Tendo training hall an unusual fact
which did not go completely unremarked upon by its residents..
     "Kasumi, Ranma and Ryoga didn't fight at all last night and now
they even got along at breakfast, do you think there's something wrong
with them."
     "Now Akane, there's nothing unusual about them getting along after
all they are good friends.  Why just look at all the time they spend
playing together."  With a cheerful smile Kasumi returned to her
housework and began humming.
     Well that was a lot of help.  "Dad, Nabiki, don't you think there's
something strange about the way Ranma and Ryoga are acting."
     Nabiki paused to consider this, then answered "You should make up
your mind, you're always telling them to stop fighting and now you sound
disappointed."  If this keeps up though it could cut into my revenues.
Maybe I can run a betting pool on how long it will last.  Lets see five
to one against them getting through the day without a fight sounds about
right.
     "Your sister is right Akane, this is a sign of good fortune, why
they've spent over twelve hours in the same building and they haven't
even destroyed part of it.  With luck like this it can't be long before
you and Ranma are married."
     As Soun began to cry tears of joy at the thought of his lifelong
dream being fulfilled, Akane stalked away.  They can't fool me, whenever
Ranma and Ryoga get along its because there's trouble.  But, they've
never gotten along this well, I wonder what's going on.  I know
something is, because when I talked to Ryoga about it he got really
nervous and stammered something about it being too nice a day to fight.
      "Yo, Akane if you don't hurry we'll be late for school," a certain
pig-tailed martial artist called drawing her out of her reverie.

     "You know you've been really nervous all morning.  It's almost like
you're expecting a demon to jump up and grab you or something."
Realizing that this could actually happen Ranma glanced nervously
around.
      "Oh, its nothing Ranma.  You know I think its really nice how well
you and Ryoga are getting along now,"  Akane said, as she looked at her
fiancee to gauge his reaction.
     "Hey I'm glad you like it.  I'm going to meet him after school and
go to Ucchans," Ranma said relieved at the route the conversation was
taking.
     I should be mad at him going to see Ukyo, but Ryoga wouldn't let
him get away with anything.  Oh no, what if Ranma's corrupting Ryoga.
"Ranma how could you do something like that to a nice guy like Ryoga,"
Akane said through clenched teeth as her temper suddenly rose.
     "What!"
     Akane slammed her book bag into the side of Ranma's head and then
walked past the twitching martial artist.

     Meanwhile Nabiki was arriving at Furinkan High having left for
school somewhat earlier.
     Hold mercenary, I require information to aid me in my noble quest
to liberate the fair Akane and the fiery pig-tailed girl," spouted a
tall figure as he strode towards her.
     "Let me guess Kuno-baby you want to know what Ranma's doing,"
Nabiki replied in a bored tone.
     "No I do not speak of the diabolical Saotome, but instead of his
cohort, the bestial rogue Hibiki," Kuno solemly recited.
     "You want to know about Ryoga, in other words.  Care to tell me
why."
     "He has proven himself to be allied with the foul sorcerer who
holds my loves in bondage.  Only the night previous he prevented me from
dating the beauteous Akane through devious and underhanded means."
     "Okay Kuno, 10,000 yen for the information."
     "Done," Kuno shouted slapping the money into her waiting hands.
"Speak now,  mercenary witch."
     "Ryoga spent a lot of time with the pigtailed girl last night.  I
believe they had dinner together and went to a movie afterwards."  This
should be fun Nabiki thought, as she struggled to control a smirk.
     "What!  The scoundrel has dared to date my noble huntress,  he
shall suffer for forcing her to submit to his depraved animal lusts.
This I swear!" Kuno cried in a ringing tone as he rose to his full
height and drew his bokken.  "The vengeance of heaven shall be swift and
sure!"  Holding his bokken high the would-be samurai turned and raced
from the school grounds.
     Well it looks like Tatewaki is going to cut classes today.  I'll
have to charge him for a copy of someone's notes.  With a faint smile
Nabiki walked in the opposite direction entering the school.

     Later that day a wet and annoyed young martial artist walked the
streets of Nerima.  I don't know why Akane had to splash me like that, I
mean she knows I'm just going to Ucchans to meet Ryoga.  It doesn't
matter though, if Ryoga actually manages to show up I can begin my
master plan.  I don't know why I didn't do this before, Ryoga would be
my friend if he wasn't obsessed with Akane and Ukyo would be another
friend if she didn't want to marry me.  Getting them together might be a
challenge for some people, but not for Ranma Saotome master of anything
goes match making.  "Mwa-ha-ha."
     "Mommy, why is that girl laughing like that?"
     "I don't know darling, maybe she goes to St.Hebereke."
     Glancing over at the young mother and her child, Ranma hurried on,
trying not to look too embarrassed by her lapse.

     Drawing near to her destination Ranma was delighted to see a figure
waiting with poorly concealed impatience.  "Ryoga, you made it."
     "Kasumi had to do some shopping, so she dropped me off here.  It
was really ... nice of her,"  Ryoga said uncertainly.
     "Well Kasumi's always glad to help out.  Come on Ryoga, this time
its my treat."  Not that Ukyo will charge me anything, but its the
thought that counts.
     Ryoga moved to follow Ranma but he was soon distracted.  "Hold
coward, I, Tatewaki Kuno shall not allow you to repeat your crime."
With those ominous words Kuno charged directly at the puzzled Ryoga
ignoring an equally puzzled Ranma.
     Ducking under a wild slash of Kuno's bokken, Ryoga landed an open
palm strike on Kuno's chest that sent his opponent staggering
backwards.  A spinning kick to the head soon propelled the dazed
kendoist into unconsciousness and embedded him in a wall across the
street.
     "Not too shabby, but do you have any idea why he attacked you?"
Ranma raised an eyebrow as she gazed at the motionless figure.  "Kuno
never makes much sense, but usually he's sorta predictable."
     "He was probably trying to get revenge, I ran into him yesterday on
my way to the Tendo Dojo.  I would've expected him to know better than
to attack me again though."
     "Ya right, he still hasn't figured out he can't beat me.  Don't
worry about it, beating Kuno up is kinda fun and no one takes him
seriously anyway.  Lets go eat maybe by the time we're finished Kuno
will be awake and we can ask him."

     The interior of the Ucchan was as cheery and well lit as always and
the two hopeful customers were soon greeted by the owner and sole
operator.  "Ranchan, Ryoga its good to see both of you,"  called a
smiling Ukyo.  That jackass Ryoga had better not start a fight with
Ranchan.  I can't afford any more repairs after that mess with Shampoo.
     "Its good to see you too Ucchan.  I'd like two extra large deluxe
okonomiyaki and lets see... what do you want Ryoga."
     "Anything without pork is fine for me ," said the lost boy looking
faintly queasy.
     "Okay two deluxe okonomiyaki and one seafood coming right up."
     The food was soon presented and Ranma tore through his serving like
a starving wolverine, while Ryoga ate methodically savoring the taste.
     Perfect, Ranchan's done but Ryoga is still eating, this is a great
chance to talk with my fiancee.  "So it looks like you and Ryoga are
getting along pretty good, isn't that a bit unusual."
     It looks like setting up Ryoga and Ukyo is going to be even easier
than I though.  "Not really Ucchan, Ryoga's a wonderful guy once you get
to know him."
     "We are talking about the same Ryoga that wants to kill you aren't
we," said Ukyo directing  a skeptical look at Ranma.
     "Well maybe he is a bit short tempered, but he has lots of good
points as well.  I mean, he's a terrific martial artist, honest, brave
and loyal to his friends.  He's even kind of good looking. Be honest
Ucchan, what do you really think about Ryoga?"
     "Well, I guess he is pretty nice," replied the flustered young
chef.
     "Great!"  I knew I could do it, after all they're perfect for one
another.  "It's time to go Ryoga, Kasumi is making sashimi for supper
tonight and I don't want to miss it."
     "Um, sure Ranma," Ryoga answered distractedly, as he rose and left
his final bite of okonomiyaki uneaten.
     Behind them Ukyo stared at their retreating backs and wondered.
There was something really wrong about that conversation and Ranchan
never even asked for hot water to change back.  I don't know why, but
I've got a bad feeling about this.

     Outside Ryoga was considering the very same conversation.  "Ranma,
you'd better go back to the Tendo's without me."
     "Huh, why is there something wrong?"
     "No, I just need to think about some things alone."  As Ryoga
strode away he called over his shoulder, "I'll see you around."  Does
Ranma really think that highly of me.  Does he really want to be my
friend.  Why can't I accept that he does and let go of the feud between
us.   I don't even know why we're always fighting anymore.  I guess its
time for me to leave on another training trip.


End of Chapter One