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Cut Wood, Carry Water 

A Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction by Bob Barnes 

Last modified 3/02/99 

               PART 3: 

There Is A Mountain, There Is No Mountain, There Is A Mountain 

- = O = - - = O = - 

Ranma 1/2 characters and situations are the property of
Rumiko Takahashi and licensees. They are used in this story
without permission. 

Acknowledgements: 

I'd like to thank KaraOhki, Susan Doenime, Bill Seney, Chris
Jones, and Dave Eddy for extensive help in pre-reading this.
If this story is better than simply ok, a lot of the credit
goes to them. Thanks folks. 

As is usual for me, much that is correct and accurate in
this story came from helpful suggestions from others.
Mistakes and inaccuracies are all mine. 

Any and all responses, comments, suggestions and/or
observations (including flames) are very much appreciated.
I'll try to respond to them all and will at least consider
incorporating any suggestions for changes I receive. Despite
all the effort, I know there are still errors in
spelling/syntax/usage lurking in here as well as possible
continuity conflicts. I've tried, hard, not to violate
canon, but you should know that I have my own ideas as to
what canon actually is.... 

If any kindly readers would like to read any of my other
stories, other parts of this story, or occationally rough
draft versions of my works in progress, they can be found at
David Eddy's web site (Thanks Dave!) at: 

http://nabiki.newberry.edu/DEddy/fanfic/bob_barnes/index.html 

The "prequel" of this story, "The Masks We Must Wear," can
be found at this site. It's also in the r.a.a.c archive and
you can get it through ftp. The file name is: 

ranma.the-masks-we-must-wear.gz 

Or you can request directly from me at rbarnes@moscow.com 

Please don't spam the FFML by requesting it through the
mailing list. I cherish the FFML and I don't like spam
because I think it could possibly endanger the existance of
the mailing list. I don't respond to any requests for
stories through the list if that's all that's in the
message, and I urge others to do the same. 

- = O = - - = O = - 


        The Triumph of No Effort

Those who are aware of triumph
When it is obvious also to the multitudes,
Do not have excellent skills.

Those who triumph during conflict
While the world says, "Well done!"
Do not have excellent skills.

To lift an autumn leaf is not an act of great strength.
To see the sun and moon is not an act of sharp sight.
To hear a sudden thunderclap is not an act of acute hearing.

Those whom the Ancient Ones called "Skilled in Conflict,"
Are those who triumph because triumph is easy.

        The Position of No Error

Those who triumph because they are skilled in conflict
Are not honored for cleverness
Or credited for heroism.

They triumph during conflict 
Because they have made no errors.

Those who have made no errors
Have arranged for certain triumph:
A triumph over those who are already defeated.

Therefore, those who are skilled in conflict
Establish a Situation that cannot be defeated,
And miss no opportunity to defeat their opponent.

-- Sun Tzu: The Art of Strategy
   Translation by R. L. Wing


- = O = - - = O = - 

     It was getting late in the evening on the Nerima
street. It was primarily a business area filled with shops
and restaurants, but most of them had closed for the night.
There weren't many people around. Two figures, a man and a
woman, could be seen standing in the gap between two
buildings. They were talking. An unbiased passerby could be
forgiven for thinking they were transacting business of an
ancient and rather sordid kind as she was young and quite
attractive and he was much older. This was not the case. 

     "So, you not know where Ranma go?" 

     "That is correct, Miss Shampoo. Our only clue is that
he was seen buying a one-way train ticket to Nagasaki via
Osaka yesterday. He boarded the train and left immediately
after that." 

     "Does anyone else in Tendo house seem like to know
anything?" 

     "No, Miss Shampoo. I don't think anyone in the house
knows where Ranma has gone. Two of us were going to leave to
look for him, but Ranma's mother arrived and stopped us." 

     "Why she do that?" 

     "She demanded we stay to help protect the household
from... er... you, Miss Shampoo." 

     "That no make sense. I not understand. Explain." 

     "Her feeling seems to be that we may be in some danger
from the Amazons because of the attack on the wedding.
Ranma's mother has become concerned that the Amazons will
attack us again, somehow. It relates to the conversation
Akane Tendo had with you this morning." 

     "So, she afraid we do something violent. How about
you?" 

     "I have no opinion on that, Miss Shampoo." 

     "Hmm... you go back and watch and listen. I give you
signal again and you come tell me what you hear and see.
Understand?" 

     "No I don't. Miss Shampoo, I thought you told me before
that I could do what I wanted to do. I thought I was free." 

     "You are... when I let you be. You forget we talk now
but remember to do what I tell you and go home with
'supplies' you buy. In other things, do what you want.
Forget and leave. Now." 

     Without a word the man turned and strode away toward
the Tendo house. When he came into the light it was possible
to see he was carrying a shopping bag from which protruded
the necks of two paper wrapped saki bottles. It was Gemna
Saotome. 

     Behind him, Shampoo stood still and silent in the
darkness between the two buildings. As always, she thought
to herself in her native language. The difference would have
surprised most people who knew her, if they could hear her
thoughts. A shivering tingle ran up her spine as she
wondered to herself, 'And would I obey as easily and
completely if Kiima were here to command me? I, too, think I
am free of her egg spell. Am I wrong? Does it still hold
me?' 

     Shampoo growled softly to herself in anger as she
recalled what had nearly happened. 'Stupid, blind Mousse
almost had me as his slave. I think it was only luck that
the first person I saw was myself in his mirror. At the
time, I assumed that would cancel the spell. Now I wonder.
Does it make any difference to be enslaved by yourself?' Her
thoughts ran back over the few weeks since the events in
China. 'A proper, young Amazon warrior is obedient and
attentive to an elder. Why is it so hard for me to hold in
my thoughts and be properly respectful to Great-grandmother?
Why do her demands seem so unreasonable to me, now? They
never used to. It's so hard to resist the impulse to blurt
out what I'm really thinking to her.' 

     Shampoo left her spot between the buildings and began
to walk slowly back to the Nekohanten. Her troubled thoughts
continued. 'Most important, why did I have the impulse to
say nothing about my power over Ranma's father, and why do I
continue to hide it? Great-grandmother might tell me to
order him to force Ranma to marry me. Whether or not he
succeeded, he would try and try hard to obey. Why am I
certain this would be a very bad idea?' She shivered as she
recalled, yet again, the incredible forces Ranma had
unleashed on Saffron. 'Do I even still believe Ranma could
be a proper Amazon husband? So many questions and so few
answers.' She growled again. 'I hate this! I hate not
knowing! Where is Ranma and what is he doing?!' 

     She picked up her pace and strode toward the
Nekohanten, muttering to herself angrily. She was going to
find some answers, and soon, if she had her way. 

* * * 

     *splash* "Ahhh. That's wonderful. This is the _good_
life," said Ranma to the bath attendant as he poured the
bucket of steaming hot water over Ranma's head. "Thanks! Oh
and look in and make sure my laundry is coming along all
right, will you please?" The attendant smiled, nodded and
left with a bow. 

     'I didn't even know places like this existed. I've got
to remember about seamen's hostels from now on. At least
when I'm on a trip near the sea coast.' Ranma wrung out his
towel, draped it over his head and slumped bonelessly down
into the water. 'Captain Furutomo said I could use his name
to get a job on another fishing boat if I ever needed to. I
wonder why Dad never figured out this way of traveling. Deep
water fishing boats go _everywhere_ and they often need
crewmen. It's pretty hard work, though, maybe that's why.
Dad never liked to work hard at anything besides the Art.' 

* * * 

     When Ranma met Captain Furutomo in a kissaten near the
docks he had been worried about the reaction to his curse.
When the Captain offered the job on his boat Ranma felt he
had to tell the story of his little problem. The Captain
hadn't believed Ranma at first, but a quick demonstration
with cold and hot water had convinced him. The Captain's
only concern had been put to rest when Ranma beat him in arm
wrestling in his girl form. He could do the job in either
form. 

     The Captain had been understanding about Ranma's
misfortune, but had warned that Ranma might have to deal
with the unwanted attentions of a couple of the rougher
crewmen on the "Drifting Lotus." After a few more bottles of
beer Captain Furutomo had gotten quite passionate about
life, misfortune, karma and how men must help one another
deal with all of that. As Ranma had helped guide his new
employer's steps back to the boat later that night, the
Captain had even tried to teach him the words to an
increadibly obscene drinking song which all true men of the
sea must know. At least that was what the Captain loudly
declared. 

     Ranma's worries about shipping out with a drunken
Captain didn't last beyond the morning's quick preparations
for departure. These came after being kicked awake by a
shouting, irritable whirlwind of energy that faintly
resembled the jovial drunk of the night before. 

     Ranma was told to work with the Bosun who dropped a
pile of oil skin and rubber garments on Ranma's head and
told him to put them on. The bosun called it foul weather
gear and informed Ranma he was going to need it. After Ranma
came on deck, the bosun grabbed him and told him to do
something complicated with a rope. When Ranma showed his
bafflement, the bosun roared at him to get his head out of
his ass and get to work. He quickly and efficiently showed
Ranma what to do with the rope and left him to it. After
that the bosun spent most of his time shouting orders,
pointing at things for Ranma to do and admonishing him to
work faster. 

     In a very short, confusing time an amazing number of
tasks were completed and the "Drifting Lotus" moved grandly
away from the pier and into the channel. Ranma sighed and
was looking for a place to rest when he was grabbed by the
Bosun and given another job to do. And another. And another.
This set the pattern for the next three weeks of soaring up
and down the mountainous waves of the Sea of Japan in late
spring. 

* * * 

     "Ranma, I wish I knew where you are right now. I really
miss you." As she carefully folded his clothes, Akane
whispered the words she would have prefered to say to Ranma
in person. 

     She had seen some of his clothing hanging out to dry
when she returned from school that day. Kasumi said she
found them with the dirty clothes when she did the laundry.
Akane helped Kasumi take down the dry laundry and separated
Ranma's things so she could put them away. 

     While she folded them in his room, she was reminded of
the many good times they had shared when he wore these
things. Thinking about the past only reminded her of how
much she wished he was there with her instead of away on his
trip. She sighed deeply and felt a tingle at the corners of
her eyes. When she came to one of his red, Chinese shirts,
the tingle grew stronger and a few tears rolled down her
cheeks as she silently finished folding everything. She put
everything away except for the red shirt and a pair of black
pants. They were just like the ones he had worn on the day
she first met him. They might even _be_ what he had worn
that day. 

     She carried the folded clothes into her room and sat
down on her bed hugging them to her chest. She rocked back
and forth as she stared blankly at the opposite wall. 

     Standing up suddenly, she strode to the door and shut
it. Then she took off her school uniform and stood next to
her bed for a moment looking down at the shirt and pants.
Slowly she picked up the shirt, shook it out and slid it on.
With quick, precise movements she slid her legs into the
pants and cinched the sash around her waist. She sighed
again as she gently rubbed the silky fabric against her
body. 

     She lay down on her bed and curled up into a ball on
her side with her arms wrapped around her and her knees
pulled up to her chest. She took in a deep, deep breath,
held it for a moment and slowly let it all out, relaxing
completely. Her eyes weren't tingling anymore and she was
smiling a small wistful smile as she slipped into a before
dinner nap. 

* * * 

     Shampoo ushered the last customer from lunch out the
door of the Nekohanten. "Shampoo wish to you to have a good
day, sir. Thank you for come to Nekohanten. Bye bye, now." 

     Shampoo's smile dropped from her face as she walked
back into the restaurant toward the kitchen.
"Great-grandmother, I think we have a problem," said Shampoo
speaking Mandarin in a worried tone of voice. 

     "Shampoo, what have I said about using Japanese at all
times?" 

     "You've said we should always use Japanese for practice
because otherwise these people won't be able to understand
us. Right now, I think it would be good if no one
understands us. I don't want anyone to overhear us,
Great-grandmother." 

     "Hmm... I see your point. What's on your mind, Great-
granddaughter?" 

     Shampoo looked around the empty restaurant while she
tried to decide how to say what she had to say. It was the
quiet time in the afternoon between lunch and dinner. She
was worried. She had been keeping a few things from Cologne.
This was never a good policy, and now she didn't know how
her Great-grandmother would react. 

     Shampoo sighed thoughtfully and said, "You know I've
been looking for Ranma, of course. I can't find him. I did
find the two younger Tendo sisters on their way to school a
few days ago, though." 

     "Well. Did you learn anything of value from them about
Son-in-law? Come on, girl, just tell it. I won't be angry
with you. I promise." 

     Shampoo began to pace back and forth in agitation.
"Akane Tendo was acting oddly. She accused me of trying to
hurt or even kill Ranma's mother when I stopped that stupid
wedding. She said some things that almost sounded like
threats. Things I don't completely understand." 

     "How could that stupid girl possibly think she could be
a threat to you, Shampoo?" 

     "No, Great-grandmother. It wasn't like that, exactly...
She talked about family honor and a lot of old fashioned
things like that. She said stopping the wedding the way I
did amounted to an attack on both the Saotome and Tendo
families. She implied it was an unprovoked and dishonorable
attack that could set off a blood feud between the families
and us. She acted as if she were completely ignoring the
fact that Ranma and I are husband and wife according to our
law, and implied that he feels the same way. She didn't say
anything at all about where he has gone or what he is doing
right now." 

     "You aren't answering my question, Shampoo. Did that
girl say she was a threat to you?" 

     Shampoo sighed deeply. She didn't want to set Cologne's
anger off, and she feared this could do it. "Great-
grandmother, she only really talked about what the Saotome
and Tendo families might do as a group. She said that if we
were to attack any of them, right now, it could set off a
blood feud against us involving every member of both
families. She said she wanted to avoid that, but that it is
our choice that will decide what happens." 

     Cologne snorted derisively. "I shake in terror at the
thought of what those idiots and incompetents might do to
us. Ha!" 

     "Perhaps you should, Great-grandmother, if Ranma is
included. You weren't at Phoenix Mountain. You didn't see
what I saw. You didn't experience what I did." Shampoo's
eyes were focused on the far distance as she remembered.
"You didn't fall under Kiima's egg spell." She hugged her
arms to herself and shivered at the memory. 

     "I'm not following you, Shampoo. What are you getting
at? I thought you said you were freed from the egg spell." 

     "Great-grandmother, the egg spell was the strangest
experience I ever had. I was Kiima's total slave. I felt
nothing at all, emotionally, except that obeying her made me
feel... complete. The only desire I had was to do her
bidding. Nothing else mattered to me at all, but I was aware
and I could see and hear as well as ever. Maybe better. I
can remember everything I experienced, clearly. I saw Ranma,
Great-grandmother. I saw him clearly... maybe for the first
time. I felt nothing for him at all, and I think this
allowed me to see something I've never noticed before. I can
appreciate how strong his will is, now. Maybe for the first
time." 

     "Shampoo, other Amazons have fallen to the Phoenix
Mountain people's egg spell in the past. We have fought more
than one war with them over their slave taking. No one else
has ever said anything like this about the effects of the
spell. Why do you say it made you see things better than
before?" 

     "I've always desired Ranma very much, and that has
colored all my perceptions of him. I tend to overlook his
faults and only see his strengths. I want him to desire me,
and so I see hints of that desire all the time in him. I
think I've been fooling myself. He was there at Phoenix
Mountain for Akane Tendo, first. He wanted to rescue me,
too, but that wasn't his first priority." 

     "This is not particularly important, Shampoo. Men are
fickle. He may like Akane Tendo more than you, now. Give him
a little time to see how desirable you are and he'll change
his mind." 

     "I've believed that for a long time, Great-grandmother.
I am doubtful, now. You didn't see him fight Saffron for
Akane Tendo's life. Saffron is the most powerful enemy we
Amazons have, yet Ranma defeated him. He won by not
accepting defeat. Ranma could hit Saffron and do damage, but
Saffron would regenerate almost instantly. Saffron kept
smashing Ranma down again and again, but Ranma always got
back up. The fight got more and more intense as it went on.
In the end Ranma fought all out and killed Saffron. I don't
think Ranma understands what happened because Saffron
regenerated as a little boy, and so technicaly he didn't
die. Never the less, in almost every way that means
anything, Ranma killed Saffron. Could you do so well against
Saffron, Great-grandmother?" 

     "Why didn't you say anything about this before,
Shampoo? This means Ranma is much stronger than I thought.
We have to know these things and take them into account." 

     "I've only now started to realize these things and what
they mean, Great-grandmother." Shampoo stopped pacing, went
to Cologne, and looked her in the eye. "You and I have seen
Ranma fight many, many times. I think the fight with Saffron
was the first time he fought someone who was a serious
threat to someone or something Ranma really cared about. In
all those other fights he was simply taking on an opponent
in a duel of honor. Not a serious threat at all. Maybe just
an annoyance. Great-grandmother, I don't think Ranma has
ever thought of _us_ as a serious threat. If we do anything
to the Tendos or Saotomes, he might change his mind, and I'm
certain, now, that we wouldn't like what would happen,
then." 

     "Shampoo, you make me ashamed! Ranma Saotome is a mere
man. A powerful fighter, it's true, but only a man. It is
disgusting for an Amazon warrior to fear a man... any man!
It's true that men can have admirable qualities, even
desireable ones, but we can't ever forget they are inferior
to us!" 

     "I wish I could be as certain of that as you are,
beloved Elder. Akane Tendo reminded me of the time Ranma
saved me from the Cat Ghost. She advised me to think about
why he bothered to do that, and I have been. Why do you
suppose he did that?" 

     "It's obvious, child. He cares about you. He secretly
wants you. I told you how fickle men's hearts are. He pushes
you away with one hand and draws you closer with the other. 

     Shampoo turned away from Cologne and began pacing,
again. "I think he does care about me. I don't think it
follows that he desires me or loves me romantically." 

     "The Cat Ghost was using magic to trap me into
something I didn't want. Ranma saved me despite his fear of
cats. It couldn't have been easy for him." Shampoo seemed
lost in thought as she paced and talked. 

     Shampoo stopped pacing and turned toward Cologne. Her
face was devoid of emotion as she forced out the next words.
"I... He..." She visibly gathered herself. "I'm certain
Ranma thinks of me as his friend. He doesn't have very many
and friends are important to him. He doesn't want me as a
lover or a wife, but he's willing to be my friend and act as
a friend when I need him... and I think that's all I'll ever
be to him." 

     She smiled wistfully and said, "I've never had very
many friends, either. I think I like having his friendship."

     Cologne hopped forward and slapped Shampoo's face...
hard. "You forget yourself, girl! In all my days I have
never heard anything so stupid and dishonorable. A friend?
An Amazon warrior can not _ever_ have a male friend. That
relationship is reserved for equals, only. Especially not an
outsider male! Three thousand years of Amazon ancestors are
groaning in horror at what you just said, Shampoo. What of
your honor? What of your duty to the tribe and our law? This
mere male must be made to submit to you as your husband and
that's all there is to it!" 

     Shampoo stared in shock at Cologne from the floor where
the force of the slap had thrown her. She held her hand to
the side of her face to catch the blood that began to slowly
drip from her split lip. Cologne hopped down to the floor
and began to pace and wave her staff while she ranted. "A
true Amazon warrior is always ready to sacrifice herself for
the sake of the Tribe, stupid girl. I remember when those
Red Guard idiots came to our village to make us part of
their stupid Cultural Revolution. If we had treated them as
anything but the enemies they were, we would have been
destroyed! Even Amazon warriors can't stand up to tanks and
bombs and jet planes!" 

     Cologne stopped pacing and whirled to face Shampoo. She
pointed the head of her staff at the frightened girl and
growled, "Shampoo, your own mother still had milk in her
breasts from suckling you when she left on her mission to
Beijing. It had to be her, because she was the best of her
generation just as you are the best of yours. The rest of us
were enough to cause a few regional Commissars and Party
Chairmen to suffer mysterious deaths or convenient lapses of
memory, but it all would have been useless if the Great Mao
Himself hadn't had a significant memory lapse, too. Despite
the cost, she succeeded, Shampoo! She was victorious,
although she was lost and never returned to us. If you give
up, you dishonor her memory, Shampoo. Can you not see this?"

     Shampoo began to shiver from suppressed rage when
Cologne mentioned her mother. Tears of anger streamed down
her face as she slowly rose to her feet. "How dare you!? How
dare you compare this to what my Mother faced, old crone!?
You elders sat there in your fine meeting hall and sent her
to her death so she could win what for us? What!? A chance
to stay the same for a little while longer while the world
continues to change around us. That's all!" 

     Cologne reeled back in surprise at Shampoo's force. She
supposed she had stepped over an unseen and unsuspected line
when she tried to shame Shampoo with her mother's memory.
Secretly she was pleased. This is how a warrior behaves...
but the words Shampoo was shouting... Oh, those awful words.

     Shampoo unconsciously began to stride back and forth
like a caged lioness. "I'm not the ignorant little girl you
first told those stories to! I've seen some of this world
for myself, and I know it's not necessarily filled with
enemies. It's true, most men are ineffectual idiots and
perverted scum, but not all of them. It's true that many
outsider women are content to act the part of submissive,
mindless receptacles for dominating men, but... not all of
them! Not all of them, damn it!" 

     Shampoo stopped and turned to Cologne. As she glared at
the small, elderly woman she brandished her fist at her as
if it held a weapon. "Some outsiders have true hearts and
honorable souls. It's easy to sit in our little valley and
convince ourselves of our superiority over the rest of the
world. If we don't learn better, the day will come when that
world will come to us and crush us like bugs! I'm beginning
to think that all you and the other elders really care about
is to hold off that day until you are all safely dead and
gone so you don't have to see it happen with your own eyes!"

     Cologne flinched back. Those terrible words pouring
from Shampoo's mouth made her quiver with dismay. What had
gone wrong with her perfect heir? Had she gone insane in
this stupid foreign country? Had she been corrupted by this
soft, silly, "civilized" society? 

     "All you elders ever talk about is our three thousand
years of glorious Amazon history! Well, what about the next
three thousand years?! Hmm? Do you even believe it's
possible that we will still exist three thousand years from
now? Even a hundred years from now? You all look back! Look
back at our beautiful past and ignore what is coming. Is it
because you think the future is ugly, or impossible?" 

     Shampoo dropped her fist and stood there looking at
Cologne with sad eyes. She continued in a quieter, more
reasonable tone of voice. "I don't, you know. I think there
can be a future for the Amazon tribe. But not if we continue
to treat every outsider as an an enemy or a potential slave!
Change is coming on us, old woman. It's coming like a
tsunami that we can't hope to resist. Our only real choice
is whether we will be destroyed by the change that is coming
or strengthened by it! I want our people to have a future!
To do that we have to open our eyes to the truth." 

     "And what do you see as that truth, Child?" asked
Cologne in a very quiet voice. This was her worst nightmare
come to life. She was the leader of the Orthodox
Conservative faction in the council and her chosen heir was
talking like a raving radical lunatic. 

     "For one thing, the world is passing us by. We are
becoming obsolete, you know?" 

     "That's ridiculous. Remember, there are still many
secret techniques I haven't taught you. There is more to our
martial art than you can dream of, foolish girl." 

     "Ha! Secret techniques, indeed. I'll say it again: you
didn't see Ranma fight Saffron. Most of the so-called secret
techniques are just tricks and you know it. You didn't see
Ranma use the techniques you taught him to do things that
ought to be impossible. He wasn't just fighting an honor
duel with Saffron at the end. He was waging all out war on
him with nothing held back and no quarter asked or given." 

     Shampoo's eyes grew distant as she relived the memory.
"He smashed a mountain apart! Just as a bit of collateral
damage he accidently destroyed Jusenkyo! Just as his so-
called defeat of me was an accident. He wasn't even fighting
me, but we decided it should count because he could beat me
if he wanted to. Of course he could defeat me, stupid old
woman! If he really tried he could flatten me into a grease
spot! And you want to try to tame him? You might be able to
kill him, if you could surprise him and got lucky, but
that's all." 

     "The truth I see is that this man should be our friend
rather than our enemy. The truth I see is that we have much
to gain by learning from him and can only lose if we try to
kill him or harm people he cares about. The truth I see is
this: If the law demands the impossible in this situation,
then it's past time for the law to change because it's doing
more harm to us than good. If you don't want to hear this,
please remember, you _did_ ask." 

      Cologne simply stared at Shampoo in shocked silence
for a time, while her thoughts raced. There was something
very wrong here, but what was the cause? She realized she
had to say something. Something to defuse the tension. In an
unnaturally calm voice, Cologne asked, "How do you think we
should proceed right now, Shampoo?" 

     "I don't think we can do anything constructive until
Ranma returns. Until then, I think we should do nothing at
all. We can tolerate the current situation because it
doesn't harm or help our cause. I'm going to take the advice
Akane Tendo gave me and try to find out a little more about
Japanese history and customs." 

     Cologne was surprised. Some of this actually made
sense. "To what end, Shampoo?" 

     "I may need to apologize for what I did at the wedding.
I need to know how to do it, just in case." 

     "Apologize to these... these people?" Cologne
sputtered. "Absolutely not! I forbid it!" 

     "I didn't say I was going to do it. I just want to know
how." 

     Cologne sighed. The young could be so stubborn,
sometimes. "It's a waste of time, but as long as neither
your work at the restaurant or your training suffers, you
may waste your time as you see fit." 

     Much time had passed during their confrontation, though
they hadn't really noticed it. Suddenly the bell over the
door tinkled, signaling the end of the midafternoon lull and
the beginning of the dinner rush. Cologne pogoed into the
kitchen while Shampoo wiped her face with a napkin, pasted
on a smile, and stepped up to the arriving customers. 

     The customers, two salary men playing hooky from their
office to get an early dinner, were quite surprised to see
the bruise discoloring the beautiful Chinese waitress's
face. Wisely they decided to say nothing about it. 

     Shampoo's smile didn't reach her eyes, but she was so
cute people rarely noticed. "Welcome to Nekohanten! I is
your waitress, Shampoo. Please to come and sit in this place
here. Shampoo will bring what you need to order too, too
delicious Chinese dinner." 

* * * 

     Six days after Ranma's departure one of Nabiki's
assistants called her at home one evening to tell her that
the lights had been turned on in Ucchan's Okonomiyaki that
night. It had been dark for over a week. It seemed Ukyou was
back in town. 

     Nabiki hurried to Akane's room to tell her about it.
Things had changed a bit between them since they'd had that
painful talk a few days before. For one thing, Nabiki had to
acknowledge that her enlistment in Akane and Ranma's cause
meant they could talk more freely in the house. For another,
Nabiki had always known that Akane exercized in her room.
After all, why would she have barbells and such if she
didn't? Before, though, she would always stop when someone
came in. Now she simply continued if Nabiki was her visitor.
It was a graphic demonstration that she no longer felt the
need to keep secrets from her older sister. To tell the
truth, Nabiki felt rather priveleged. Some of the things
Akane routinely did during her workouts were awe inspiring. 

     Tonight Akane was doing one armed hand stand pushups.
She'd do ten then switch hands. Not by dropping her idle
hand and balancing for a moment on two hands. instead, she'd
do a sort of one armed hop and switch hands in the air. She
was sweating heavily, but her breathing was regular and
even. 

     Until now, Nabiki hadn't even known a person could do
that. She watched for a bit then said, "I can come back in a
little while, if you want, Akane." 

     "It's ok, Big Sister. I can talk while I do this, or
you can wait. I'll be done for the night in just a moment...
and nine and ten." Akane dropped her idle hand to the floor,
paused perfectly still for a moment then lowered herself
slowly until her elbows almost touched the floor. With a
sharp "Ha!" of effort she bounced into the air, tucked into
a ball, spun, and opened out just in time to land silently
on her feet. She looked over at Nabiki and smiled
ironically. 

     "Show off," snorted Nabiki. 

     "Heh. I guess I'm inspired. I don't always land that
quietly." She picked up a towel and wiped off some of the
sweat. "Whew! I think I'm about ready for a bath. What's
up?" 

     "I just found out that Ukyou's back in town. She'll
probably be in school tomorrow. What are you going to tell
her?" 

     "Well, she'll hear about Ranma as soon as she gets to
school, if she doesn't already know about him. Because of
the wedding, she's in the same position as Shampoo. I can't
go easy on her, or the Amazons will get suspicious. On the
other hand, she thinks she has a claim on Ranma, so she
won't be easy to put off. She also won't be likely to
believe me if I tell her the claim isn't exactly what she
thinks it is." 

     "What do you mean by that?" Nabiki was surprised, but
stopped herself quickly. They were home, after all. She
continued in a quieter voice, "What do you mean, 'not what
she thinks it is'?" 

     "Hmm," came Akane's muffled voice from under the towel
she was using to dry some of the sweat in her hair. "It's
kind of technical, but the fact that the engagement with the
Tendo family came first combined with Ukyou's abrogation of
her engagement to Ranma when she met and fought Ranma's
father means she doesn't actually have a valid marriage
claim on Ranma." 

     "Akane, this is new to me. I had no idea that Ukyou did
that, and no one has said anything about it, around me,
since then. What happened, exactly." 

     Akane stopped drying her hair and dropped gracefully to
sit on the floor. She looked significantly at Nabiki and
patted the floor next to her. Once Nabiki was sitting near
her she continued in a quiet voice. "Hmm... ok, you know the
story of what happened when Ranma and Ukyou were both
children, right?" 

     Nabiki nodded. 

     "When Ukyou first arrived here, she attacked Genma,
remember?" 

     Nabiki nodded, again. 

     "Among some other things she said to Genma was this:
'I've lost everything because of you and that son of your's.
I'm not here to marry him, you old fool. I'm here for
revenge on both of you. Now defend yourself, old man.' After
that she beat Genma up pretty good and left him unconscious,
right?" 

     Nabiki nodded yet again... slowly and thoughtfully.
There was something wrong with this and she was only now
realizing it. 

     Akane continued, "This is the same Genma Saotome who
can pretty much hold his own against Ranma in a straight out
fight with no special attacks, right? Also this is the man
who wouldn't hesitate to run away unless he had a pretty
good reason to fight. And she beat him. And she had no
chance against Ranma when she finally fought him. That was
obvious when I watched them fight." 

     "Akane, I saw that fight, too, and it looked to me like
Ukyou did pretty well against Ranma." 

     Akane chuckled quietly and rocked forward to whisper,
"You're forgetting something, Nabiki. Remember what I told
you about the way Ranma likes to fight. 'Never show them
everything you've got and make it look like they just barely
lost... maybe due to bad luck or something.' It's a part of
what makes it an art form and not just a way to beat people
up." 

     "Hrmmm..." Nabiki had only learned the true story a few
days before and was still having trouble with the idea that
she'd have to reevaluate nearly everything she thought she
knew about Ranma... and Akane, too. "Yeah. I did forget.
It's a little breathtaking to realize how many times I
calculated the odds on one of Ranma's fights, got them wrong
because I didn't know what was really going on, and still
won on the betting because he almost let his opponent win. I
really don't know how to take it." Nabiki squirmed
uncomfortably to try to ease the tension in her shoulders
and back. It surprised her. When had she started to tense
up? 

     Akane noticed Nabiki's discomfort and motioned for her
to turn around and back up so she could reach Nabiki's
shoulders. Akane began to massage Nabiki's back and
shoulders. With her strength and control, Akane could give a
wonderful massage. 

     Nabiki sighed and softly groaned in pleasure as the
tension began to flow away. "You know, Akane. I really
should be outraged at what you two did to me. I feel so
foolish when I think about it and I hate feeling like that."

     Akane spoke very quietly into Nabiki's ear as she
worked. Almost a whisper. "I know you do, Big Sister. You
shouldn't feel so foolish, though. I suppose it sounds
conceited, but Ranma and I have gotten awefully good at
playing our roles. It's kind of scary, sometimes. I mean,
neither of us ever sat down and planned to fool you or
anybody else besides Father and Mister Saotome. It's just
that we become the people we are playing, and I mean that in
a literal sense." 

     "You're going to have to explain that a little, Akane.
I don't understand what you mean." 

     "Explaining isn't easy because it can sound like a sort
of crazy, split personality thing. Hmmm... I can think of a
couple of examples. You know I love Ranma very much and I
hate hitting him. The Tomboy hits him all the time,
though... and... she likes doing it a little. I think the
Tomboy is kind of sadistic or something. The thing is, when
the Tomboy and the Baka fight, there isn't any script or
anything like that. We just become the characters and act
naturally, so to speak." 

     "You're right, Akane. That does sound a little weird. I
mean, the 'Tomboy' is actually you, right?" 

     "Well, yes and no. On one level there isn't any
difference because it's all just me. On another level there
is another person called the Tomboy, and I tend to think of
her as being separate like that. It helps keep things in
perspective to think of her as something I sort of built out
of parts of my own personality. But when I'm in the role I
don't think about any of those details. I just _be_ her.
It's a kind of trick to make the role as convincing as
possible. Maybe it's impossible for someone who doesn't act
to understand." 

     "Yeah... well I don't really get it. What's the other
example you mentioned? Maybe that'll help." 

     Akane started giggling and stopped her massage for a
moment. She shifted her hands to Nabiki's lower back and
dropped a small bomb shell. "Do you remember a time a little
while ago when you and Ranma spent the day at home alone
together?" 

     Nabiki jerked when she heard Akane and started to try
to get to her feet and move away. Akane slipped her hands
around to Nabiki's stomach and firmly pulled her back into a
loose hug. "It's ok, Big Sister. Really." 

     "You _know_ about that?" 

     "Of Course. Ranma and I tell each other everything." 

     "And you're not mad at him... or... me?" 

     "Why should I be? I trust Ranma totally, Nabiki. And as
for you... well sometimes loving someone means you spend a
lot of time forgiving them until it sort of becomes a
reflex. I do love you, Big Sister, even if you are kind of
weird sometimes." 

     "Bu... bu... but I spent that whole day tricking him
and blackmailing him and... well, torturing him. Do you mean
to say he knew what was going on and _let_ me do that? Was
he laughing at me the whole time, then?" She began to
stiffen up and Akane went back to massaging Nabiki's back. 

     "No. He wasn't. He didn't think the situation was funny
at all. He felt terrible about those concert tickets getting
ruined, and he wanted to make it up to you somehow. The
reason I thought this would make a good example is that you
really were tricking him and making him feel guilty and
scared because he was in the character of the Baka and
that's the way the Baka would react. He didn't plan anything
or even think about any details of the impression he wanted
to create... he just _was_ the character." 

     "Ah... I don't know how to react. You're saying he knew
what was going on and knew you wouldn't be mad at him, yet
he was also scared at the same time?" 

     "That's just it, Nabiki. Not at the same time. While it
was happening he _was_ nervous and upset and all that. The
emotions have to be as real as possible for the
characterization to work the best. _Later_ he worked it all
out and reacted to it all as Ranma rather than the Baka.
That's a big part of what it means to _be_ the character."
Akane sighed in frustration, "It's so hard to explain." 

     Akane was behind Nabiki and couldn't see the avaricious
smile that played across her lips. "I think I understand a
little of it, Akane-chan. You know, if you and Ranma are as
good at this acting business as you seem to be, there could
be a future for you both in the movies or on the stage. I
could probably do a good job as your agent for the usual
fifteen percent." 

     "Oh... that would be fun, I think. It's so far in the
future, though. I can't see how we'll get there from here.
We've got so many troubles right now. Sometimes it's hard to
believe we'll have a future." 

     "You will, Little Sister. You will, if I have anything
to say about it. So... about that agent thing. What do you
think?" 

     "Heh. What I think is that you are still Nabiki, and
I'm glad about that." 

     "Whatever do you mean?" 

     "Ah... come on, Big Sister," Akane said teasingly. "You
know as well as I do the standard agent's commission is ten
percent." 

     Nabiki jerked a bit at this. She still wasn't used to
Akane behaving this way toward her. "So, you still haven't
told me what you think of the idea." 

     "What I think is this: If, and these are all big ifs...
if we get through all this and Ranma wants to give
professional acting a try, and if we have the opportunity to
do it, and if you still want to be our agent, then I like
the idea a lot." Akane leaned her forehead against Nabiki's
back. "Also, if you want fifteen percent for it, you only
have to ask, Big Sister. You don't have to trick me. We're
family, after all." 

     The pressure of Akane's face against her back reminded
Nabiki of how intimately they were sitting. She slid away
from Akane and turned to face her on her knees. She looked
into Akane's face and said in a transparantly fake, pouting
way, "You are just no fun at all anymore, Little Sister.
Maa! Where's the challenge in just asking?" 

     Akane grinned at Nabiki for a moment, then sat back as
a thoughtful expression stole over her face. "If you want a
challenge, Big Sister. There's always Ukyou to think about."

     Nabiki sat silently for a few moments, thinking. "So,
you're saying that what Ukyou said during her fight with
Genma amounts to an abrogation of the engagement?" 

     "Well, it means that in her own mind and at that time,
she didn't consider herself engaged to Ranma. It's quite
informal, but still it amounts to a technical abrogation of
the arrangement? Or... maybe expressed intent to abrogate it
would be a better way to put it." 

     "Akane, you sound just like a lawyer when you talk like
that. Did you know that?" 

     "Heh. Well, when Ranma and I were studying this sort of
thing, we found that you can't talk about agreements like
this, and be precise, without sounding a little like a
lawyer. I mean, how often would you ever use a word like
'abrogate' in a conversation, eh?" 

     "I think Gemna allowing Ukyou to defeat him is
significant here, too." Nabiki thoughtfully chewed her lip
and looked blank for a few moments. "That's a really
significant thing among martial artists, right?" She hurried
on without waiting for an answer, "Genma could say that
Ukyou has _had_ her revenge, for all the good it did her,
because she defeated him in a fair fight. I think he was
looking out for himself. He obviously can't return the dowry
he ran off with, so now he can say the debt of honor was
cleared by his defeat at her hands. It's not a clear cut
thing, but it's a debatable point... and in his favor.
Hmm... It's too bad Ranma didn't let Ukyou defeat him, too.
That would have settled the whole thing right there." 

     Akane sighed, "Well yeah, we figured that out, but only
later. He fought her the same way he always fights... to
win. We both felt really stupid when we realized how much
trouble we could have prevented if Ranma had thrown the
fight. Still, it would be an awfully hard thing for him to
do. He's not used to fighting that way." 

     She cupped her face in her hands and rested her elbows
on her knees. A pensive look stole over Akane's face. "Ranma
_really_ felt like an idiot when he realized his offhand
remark about Ukyou being cute made her start thinking of him
as her fiance, again. He was just trying to cheer her up!"
Akane sighed. "He was just being honest, you know? I mean,
Ukyou really is pretty cute. He was just saying what was
really on his mind. Ha! And people wonder why he almost
never does that. The reason is he gets into more trouble
every time he tells the truth. Lying doesn't make things any
better, but at least it doesn't make them worse, most of the
time." 

     Nabiki looked rather sharply at Akane as she said, "You
know, all this means that Ranma has been leading her on ever
since she got here. I mean, by not telling her the
engagement is technically invalid and letting her believe
she is his fiance. That isn't a very nice thing to do to a
girl." 

     Akane flushed a bit and sat up straight. "You're right,
Nabiki, but there hasn't been a lot of choice. The big worry
is what she might do if Ranma told her how he really
feels... in a way she'd believe. You know he has never
encouraged her in any active way. The most that anyone could
say is that he doesn't actively try to drive her away. He
regularly protests that he isn't engaged to anybody.
Naturally, no one listens to him, but that's not his fault."

     Akane's eyes narrowed and she spoke the next words
earnestly. It was important for Nabiki to understand this.
"Don't forget what Ukyo did at my wedding, Nabiki. Neither
Ranma nor I like fooling people the way we have, but we have
had reason to worry about their reaction if we stopped. I
mean, it's not the sort of thing you can test safely. This
is a girl who spent ten _years_ hunting Ranma down just to
get revenge. I may be a lot better at martial arts than most
people realize, but anyone can be gotten to by a surprise
strike from ambush." 

     Akane reached out and took Nabiki's hands in hers.
"Nabiki, our main problem is that none of these people will
back off an inch in their demands and all of them have given
us reason to believe they could do real damage if they
dropped considerations of honor and went all out to harm us.
Some have actually done it. Remember what Shampoo did to me
with that damned memory shampoo of hers?" 

     Akane sat silently for a few moments thinking about the
horror that had almost happened to her. Continuing she said,
"As long as all of the fathers, rivals and fiancees think
there is reason to hope they might win, they hold back
enough to allow us some breathing room. Even now, the
impression I'm working to create: that I consider us to be
all but married, is something they can put down to the
belief of an hysterical girl because of the way I'm doing
it. Gods, Nabiki, I have nightmares sometimes of what might
happen if they all learned the truth! It's horrible to think
of people we sometimes think of as friends coming for blood
and revenge. We don't want to hurt anybody, Big Sister! The
truly scary thing is that we might not have a choice,
someday. In comparison to a potential bloodbath, tricking
people about their feelings seems like a pretty small
thing." 

     "Akane, Akane... Little Sister do you have any idea how
paranoid that sounds? This isn't something teens should be
worrying about. With a few exceptions, all the people
involved in this are teenagers, after all." 

     "I know, Nabiki, and most of the time they seem safe
enough to be around. It's just that all of these people have
given glimpses and sometimes a little more than a glimpse of
what they might be capable of in an extreme situation. Just
about everything Ranma and I have done for more than a year
was aimed at preventing an extreme situation from happening.
Maybe in the end it will turn out to have been a waste and
maybe we could have trusted a few of them, but the risk is
so big! Not just for Ranma and me, either. There are
innocent bystanders to consider. I mean, is it absolutely
impossible to think that someone might kidnap Kasumi to
force Father to drop the engagement, for example? I think,
deep down, everyone realizes that Ranma would never forgive
anyone who really harmed me and that I feel the same about
anyone who would hurt Ranma, but they might decide that
threatening people we care about could work." 

     "Jeez, Akane. That's such a depressing thing to think
about. Still, I can see why you and Ranma got so close if
this is what you think might happen. I can see why you are
so careful about the secret of the act you are putting on,
too. If one person found out about it, in no time at all,
everyone would find out one way or the other. So letting
Ukyou in on what is really happening is out, right?" 

     "Right! Nabiki, think about the wedding, again. Ranma
and I had a plan to stop it if we had to. We'd just pick a
fight and I'd punt him out of the dojo. You can't have a
wedding without a groom, after all. What actually happened
was a total surprise to both of us." Akane sighed, again.
"Well, at least one good thing came of it. It finally got
through to father that ignoring all the problems and just
going ahead with a wedding isn't going to work... and it
only took a year of troubles and the near total destruction
of the dojo to do it. Anyway, that's a clue or maybe a
partial answer to an important question: 'How far would
people go if the secret were to get out?' They'd go pretty
far, Nabiki... pretty far!" 

     "All right, Akane. I get the point. As long as Ranma
doesn't actually marry _anybody_, then everybody can hope
they'll win in the end. Hmm... let me think about this a
little. I may have an idea that would work. Meanwhile,
tomorrow at school, try to avoid Ukyou and if she confronts
you, give her the ice cube treatment. That ought to hold her
off for a day or so. I'll see what I can come up with in the
meantime. I wonder if... Hmm..." 

* * * 

     Her Ranchan was gone! 

     Ukyo had returned from visiting her father filled with
a new resolve to see that things turned out right, but none
of that mattered, now. Her Ranchan was gone! 

     Ukyo trudged up the stairs to her bedroom. She dropped
her suitcase just inside the door and flopped on the bed.
Burying her head in her pillow, she waited to see if she was
going to cry. She felt all twisted up inside. This was an
impossible situation! 

     Her father had been blunt with her... er... him. The
honor of the Kuonji family required one of two things:
Revenge or marriage. He was growing impatient, and was close
to dropping the marriage possibility and ordering her to
simply take revenge on the Saotomes the best way she could. 

     She tried to tell him that she cared for Ranma, and
didn't think she could hurt him. It was like talking to a
stone. 

     Dammit! The old man wouldn't even listen to her. He
hadn't listened since the day he'd announced he no longer
had a daughter, but would settle for a son who could fight
and get revenge for the sake of the family. 

     Ukyo was certain her father wouldn't tolerate failure,
either. He had informed her that failure on her part would
require him to disown her as his son, just as he had done to
his daughter. Further, he had said the loss of his son would
require him to take matters into his own hands, and if that
happened, only blood... Saotome blood, would do. 

     She sighed and rolled over onto her back. Lacing her
fingers behind her head, she stared up at the ceiling. She
had understood so little when she was younger. Her father
had changed, but she hadn't seen anything of what was
causing the changes or what they meant. It was like some
sort of weird horror story. Her father was so stubborn and
so narrow minded. 

     He had gone on and on about the total dishonor of the
Kuonji family, but she had been too busy training to notice
what he had done about it. In school, she, disguised as a
boy and playing the role of one as well, was shunned by most
of the other children. She hadn't understood why, then. The
few children who would associate with her were a pretty
rough group, but fairly good friends, nevertheless. Good
enough friends that she had never worried much about how few
they were. And the training took up a lot of time, too. It
was easy to ignore the disturbing things she noticed from
time to time. Things like her father's new enthusiasm for
tattoos. 

     It wasn't until junior high that she began to put the
clues together. She learned that the rigid stratification of
Japanese society required an outlet. There are always those
people who don't fit in for some reason. People who are
shunned and despised by society. A family in complete
dishonor was doomed to fall into that social position
because their neighbors were sure to talk and gossip about
them. 

     If only her father had lied and told some story about
thieves stealing the yattai, but no, not her stupid father.
He had to get drunk and tell it all. People laughed and
pointed their fingers, but drew back, too. They whispered
about something being wrong with the Kuonjis. Unable to find
work or get a loan to restart his business, her father
hadn't had very many choices. Only one, really. That social
outlet provided by Japanese society for the fallen. 

     When Ukyo was in junior high her father had gone away
for two weeks and returned a different man. Apparantly he
had been promoted or something, but her mother hadn't wanted
to celebrate or even talk about it. When the bandages came
off his hand, Ukyo was shocked to find out his left, little
finger was missing. 

     It was shortly after that the whispers became loud
enough at school for Ukyo to hear the ugly word clearly.
Yakuza. The other boys in her group laughed. Her friends, as
few as they were, didn't seem to mind at all. They laughed
as they began to make small loans and take bets on sporting
events. They laughed as they did what they had to do to
ensure that they were paid what they were owed. It made
Ukyo's flesh crawl. Soon, she went to her father and told
him it was time for her to leave and find the Saotomes. She
had to get away from the creeping insanity that was her
life. 

     Naturally, he hadn't understood. He wept and told her
how proud he was of his son. At last, Ukyo was going to take
her hard won martial arts skills and go seek the revenge
that honor demanded. As she was leaving he had pressed a wad
of yen notes into her hands and a list of telephone numbers
to call in various places around the country, in case she
ever needed help "dealing" with the Saotomes. He then said
something to her for the first time. Something that seemed
almost like a mantra to him. "No matter how powerful a
martial artist is, not one has ever turned out to be bullet
proof." 

     That memory made Ukyo shiver as she lay there on her
bed. A simple defeat in combat was not the sort of revenge
her father wanted. Ranchan had never figured it out, of
course. He was so naive and trusting. He had never asked how
she found them in Nerima, for example. Of course, she had a
lie all prepared for answering that question. It wouldn't do
for her fiance to learn of her "connections." 

     Why couldn't he understand that marriage to her was the
only possible way for things to turn out happily? He never
said "yes" and he never said "no." Pinning Ranchan down was
like trying to trap a drop of mercury on a glass plate with
one finger. 

     The only good thing about the wedding attempt was that
her father hadn't heard about it until afterwards. Naturally
he hadn't understood her attack on the wedding any more than
he'd understood her desire to get away from her former life
at home. He said he was quite proud of her, though a bit
disappointed that there wasn't a body count. He had then
invited/ordered her home for a talk and a visit. She'd been
able to put him off for a few weeks, but no more. 

     She was resolved, finally, to tell Ranchan the truth
and level with him about how desperate things really were.
So what happens? He's gone! He left town and no one knows
where he went or when he'll be back! Shit! 

     Those damned Tendos had to know more than they were
telling. Tomorrow, she was going to have to do something
about that. Ukyo realized, if Akane were somehow in danger,
then Ranma would almost certainly return to defend or save
her. The problem with that was his certain reaction if he
learned that his Ucchan was to blame, and he was certain to
learn, sometime. 

     Those old doubts began to surface, yet again. Ranchan
_said_ the reason he defended Akane so fiercely was that his
family honor was as stake. He implied he didn't actually
care about her, but he never really said that, did he? 

     He'd said it so _many_ times: "Who would want a
kawaiikunee tomboy like her?" It invited the answer, "no one
would." 

     Ukyo's fear was that the real answer was, "Ranma
Saotome would!" Did Ranchan want the kawaiikune tomboy
rather than the cute fiancee? 

     Ukyo turned on her side and pulled her knees up into
the fetal position as she prepared to spend yet another long
night thinking around and around in the old, well worn
circles. "This can't go on very much longer," she whispered
to herself. 

* * * 

     From the dark shadows of the alleyway, she could see a
heavyset man approaching along the lighted street. This
might be him. She stepped to the edge of the light and
waited for him to come to her. As the man drew closer, she
could see he was clothed in a slightly ragged gi and had a
cloth tied over his head. It was him. 

     "Genma Saotome, stop there." Her voice was firm and
commanding. 

     The man jolted to a halt and looked toward her. He
began to speak to her, and surprise started to show on his
face as he recognized who had spoken to him. Abruptly, all
emotion drained from his face, he closed his mouth and he
simply stood there, silently waiting. 

     She stepped forward, into the light from the street,
and said, "Come here. I need talk with you." 

     "Yes, Miss Shampoo." Genma's voice was devoid of
emotion as he turned and followed the girl into the shadows
of the alley. 

     "Tell me what you find out about Ranma and where he
go." 

     "Miss Shampoo, I haven't been able to learn anything
new, beyond rumors at his school. I don't believe any of the
rumors I've heard. He has not tried to contact anyone here
that I know of. Soun Tendo and I have both contacted people
we know in Nagasaki, and no one has seen him there. He could
be anywhere. I just don't know where." 

     Shampoo thought about that for a moment. "Tell me this:
do you have any idea why he go away?" 

     "Ahh... I suspect it's my fault, Miss Shampoo. Soun
Tendo and I have been trying to pressure him into marrying
Akane Tendo by doing nothing to resolve any of the conflicts
and dilemmas facing him. I had hoped that he would believe
that marriage to Akane Tendo was his only viable
alternative. I suspect either he has run away from _all_ his
troubles and will never return as I might do in his
position, or that he has learned something he thinks may
help him solve at least some of his problems and gone to do
something about it. I don't know what that could be,
though." 

     "So... are things you could do to fix Ranma's
problems?" 

     "Y-yes, Miss Shampoo." Genma's emotionless face was
abruptly covered with a sheen of sweat. 

     "Tell me what you could do." 

     "I-I m-m-must n-not do that, Miss Shampoo." 

     Shampoo looked sharply at him. This was surprising. He
shouldn't be able to resist her like this. "Hmm... tell me
_why_ you must not tell." 

     Drops of sweat began to roll down Genma's face. His
body began to tremble, slightly, but his face was still
blank and emotionless. "I have been commanded, not to tell
anyone, or even to think very much about that, Miss
Shampoo." 

     "And who command you?" 

     "M-my M-master, Miss Shampoo." 

     This _was_ interesting. Shampoo thought about it and
realized she had better be careful, here. The egg spell was
magical, and the only thing that could cause such a conflict
had to also be magical. A conflict like this could be quite
harmful to Genma Saotome, and he was too valuable to use up,
right now. "You believe what I tell you... yes?" 

     "Yes I do, Miss Shampoo." He began to relax, a bit. 

     "Believe this, then: your Master wants you to tell me
this. It will help your Master for you to tell me this. You
want to help your Master, don't you?" 

     "I must support my Master when I can. I must obey him
and honor him, always. I may think about resisting him, and
I may try to resist him, but I must always fail. I want only
to obey you, Miss Shampoo." Genma's shivering increased for
a few moments then abruptly stopped. "I believe you, Miss
Shampoo. I will support the Master by telling you what must
not be spoken of." 

     "Tell me with your words, what you must not tell anyone
else except me." 

     Genma began to speak in a droning monotone. As he
spoke, Shampoo's eyes grew to the size of saucers. She had
never suspected there were secrets like this involving her
husband. She also realized there was some danger involved in
knowing these things. Genma's Master, Happousai, was even a
threat to her Great-Grandmother, under the right
circumstances. She decided to simply listen and not
interrupt with questions. 

     When Genma stopped talking, Shampoo said, "Now, you
forget you say anything to me about this." 

     "Yes, Miss Shampoo." 

     "Genma Saotome, you forget I ever say anything about
your Master." 

     "Yes, Miss Shampoo." 

     Shampoo thought for a moment then decided to test
Genma. "So... there are things you could do to fix Ranma's
problems?" 

     "Y-yes, Miss Shampoo." Genma began to sweat. 

     "Tell me what you could do." 

     "I-I m-m-must n-not do that, Miss Shampoo." Genma,
still sweating, began to shiver, again. 

     "Ok. You no tell me anything about that. Is ok." 

     "Yes, Miss Shampoo." Genma stopped sweating and
shaking, immediately. 

     The two stood silently for nearly five minutes while
Shampoo thought furiously about what she had learned. Genma
simply waited, calmly. 

     Finally, "Genma Saotome. You will forget you saw me
tonight. You never saw Shampoo. Do you understand?" 

     "Yes, Miss Shampoo. I never saw you." 

     "Only remember to try to find out what happen to
Ranma." 

     "I will try to find out what happened to Ranma, Miss
Shampoo." 

     "Good. Now go and do what you doing before." 

     Without a word Genma wheeled around and walked briskly
out of the alley, turned down the street at the end, and
walked out of sight. 

     Shampoo stepped back until she felt the wall of the
building she was next to. Slowly she slid down the wall
until she was sitting on her heels. She stared blankly at
the ground between her knees through the lovely purple hair
that hung down over her face. This was too big... too
much... not just a secret. This was a S*E*C*R*E*T. The kind
of thing that could be fatal to know. She thought upon the
oldest piece of Amazon wisdom she had ever learned: 'A
secret that is known by two people isn't a secret.' She was
afraid of what might happen if her Great-grandmother learned
of this. She had to keep this to herself and tell no one.
How could she keep a secret from Great-grandmother? She was
an Amazon Elder! She could almost read Shampoo's mind! 

     Sounds of traffic, sounds of people walking and
talking... none of this penetrated her thoughts. The people
on the street walked by the alleyway completely oblivious to
the troubled Chinese girl crouched in the darkness wrestling
with the most troublesome thoughts she had ever had. What
should she do? What _could_ she do? Most important of all:
what did her husband... no. What did Ranma, her _friend_,
know? Did he need her help? 

* * * 

     One of the most surprising effects of Ranma's departure
was that Akane was actually starting to enjoy school. There
had been some changes since Ranma's departure, some subtle
and some not so subtle. For one thing, the boys left her
strictly alone. For a change, a girl's declaration that she
wasn't interested or available was listened to. It helped
that ignoring her feelings would almost certainly be very
painful and possibly even hazardous to one's health. 

     A few of the more enterprising and intelligent of the
boys had even started paying some attention to the other
attractive girls at the school. They discovered that this
was neither painful nor hazardous to health, but could
actually be quite pleasant. Naturally, boys being boys, only
a very few had worked this out. Still, it was a promising
trend and many of the girls assumed Akane was the cause and
were thankful to her for it. 

     Kuno had become a hovering presence at the periphery of
Akane's attention. He never approached her overtly, but
contented himself with watching her from a distance. Akane
was actually able to devote a lot of her attention to school
work and socializing with her friends. The seemingly endless
barrage of questions they asked her just after Ranma left
had settled down to a trickle since she steadfastly refused
to answer any of them. She also made a point of laughing
raucously at the often bizarre rumors that were reported to
her. It seemed a belly laugh was far more effective at
scotching a rumor than any amount of reasoned explanation. 

     Akane was feeling pretty good when she entered the
school grounds that seventh day after Ranma's departure. She
was with Nabiki and even enjoyed arriving at school early
enough that she didn't have to rush to class. Then she
noticed Ukyou standing silently beside the front doors of
the school building. She didn't look particularly happy to
see the Tendo sisters. 

     Akane began to draw up inside when she felt Nabiki's
hand on her arm. Nabiki gave her a look as if to say, "Let
me handle this." Akane relaxed a bit. It was time to start
trusting her sister in a big way. 

     Ukyou strode up to them and planted herself directly in
their path. "I want you to tell me where Ranchan is and I
want you to tell me right now," she announced. 

     Nabiki looked her over noticing that she had her large
combat spatula as well as her belt of smaller, throwing
spatulas with her. The silence stretched for an
uncomfortably long time before Nabiki spoke. Finally: "That
would make you happy, would it?" 

     "Well, errr... yeah, I guess it would." Nabiki wasn't
following the script... at all. 

     "Tell me what my motivation is, Kuonji-san." There was
an obvious insolent quality to Nabiki's calm voice. 

     "Huh? What do you mean?" asked Ukyou, obviously off
balance. This confrontation was definately not going
according to plan. There was supposed to be an argument
followed by a fight which she, Ukyou, would win, of course.
Nabiki's calm and confident manner was very unsettling. 

     "Tell me, Ukyou Kuonji, why I or any other member of
the Tendo and Saotome families would _want_ to make you
happy. If you can give me a good reason, I might do it." 

     "Huh!?" Frustration and anger began to build in Ukyou.
Nabiki seemed to be implying she was the injured party in
this affair. How dare she!? "You better tell me what I want
to know right now, Nabiki, or so help me I'll..." Ukyou was
unconsciously fingering one of her throwing spatulas. 

     "Or you'll what, Ukyou? Hurt me? Attack me right here
in front of the school? Nope, you'll have to do better than
that. Threats of violent attack don't make me over concerned
with making you happy, you know. Try again." 

     Akane was silently taking all this in. Ukyou was
obviously getting flustered. Nabiki seemed as cold as a
pillar of ice to Akane. Normally, an angry martial artist
would be frightening, but Nabiki didn't seem particularly
bothered. She showed no fear at all. More like a bit of
ironic amusement combined with a little boredom at how
tedious it all was. 'She must be counting on me to back her
up, if necessary,' thought Akane to herself. She
unobtrusively shifted to a better position. 

     Ukyou flicked her eyes toward Akane, but seemed to
discount her. Her attention focused on Nabiki. "I just want
to know that Ranchan is all right. I'm worried about him." 

     "That's a lot better, Ukyou. I'm sure Ranma would
appreciate your concern. I can assure you that Ranma is just
fine." 

     "Like I'd believe you, Nabiki. Are you going to tell me
where Ranma is, or not?" 

     "Try to understand how little I care whether or not you
believe me. Oh yes. It'll be 'Not'." 

     "Huh?" 

     "I said, 'Not.'" Nabiki raised one eyebrow. "Don't you
remember the choices? I'm going for option 2: Not." 

     "Nabiki! You'd better tell me what I want to know..."
Ukyou began to slip one of her throwing spatulas out of her
bandoleer. She was distracted when Akane cleared her throat.

     "Ukyou," said Akane softly. "That's not going to help
you at all, you know. It would be lots better if you just
left that where it is for now." 

     'This is too weird,' Ukyou thought to herself. 'No
one's acting the way they're supposed to.' "What do you know
about it, Akane?" 

     "I know for certain that fighting will not help you at
all, right now. It's not that kind of situation. You should
think about what's been happening the last few weeks. You
don't understand what's going on, and you need to before you
decide what to do." 

     "What about Ranchan, Akane?" 

     "I'll tell you the same thing I've told everyone else.
He is away on family business. The details don't concern
you, Ukyou." 

     "You're acting like I don't have any concerns here.
Like I'm not his fiancee." 

     "Yes we are, aren't we?" said Nabiki. "Why do you
suppose that is?" 

     "You can't just cut me out like that! I won't allow
it!" 

     "Ukyou, that has nothing to do with the Tendo family,
and you should know it," said Nabiki. "If you have issues
here, it's with Genma Saotome, and only with him. Perhaps
you should refer this to him, or you can wait until Ranma
Saotome returns and take it up with him. The Tendo family
has no obligations in this matter and we have no obligations
to you. Especially since the wedding. You're going to have
to think your way through this, Ukyou. Fighting...
especially fighting us will only make things much, much
worse for you. Trust me on that one." 

     "Are you threatening me, Nabiki?" 

     "Definately not, Kuonji-san. You should know me better
than that. I state facts. I don't threaten... ever. This has
been a pleasant discussion, but we all have to get to class,
along with the rest of the student body. We _are_ blocking
the doors, after all." 

     Nabiki and Akane both stepped back a half step and
waited patiently for Ukyou to make up her mind. 

     Ukyou snorted in disgust, spun on her heel and stomped
angrily into the building. Akane and Nabiki followed a few
steps behind. Once in the building Nabiki grabbed Akane's
arm and pulled her to the side by the wall. The rest of the
students began to stream in, looking curiously at the two
sisters as they went past. It was too loud in the
entranceway to hear anything they said. 

     "Damn, Little Sister. This confrontation business
really _does_ take it out of you, doesn't it?" 

     "Now you know how I felt the other day with Shampoo. I
know I've said this before, but I'm awfully glad you're
helping. That seemed to go very well, considering." 

     "It did, didn't it? We didn't tell her anything, and
you didn't have to fight. I'd call that a win. Or did you
want to fight?" 

     "No... not yet. When I do, it'll probably reveal too
much that I'd like to keep quiet for a while longer.
Besides, I'd still like to do this without hurting Ukyou.
Damn it, Nabiki! I'd like her to be a friend, not an enemy."

     "Well, when she learns what's really been going on,
she's not going to be very happy with you or Ranma. Notice I
said 'when' not 'if'." 

     Akane sighed, "I know. If she'll let us, we'll try to
make it up to her, somehow. I don't know if she'll let us,
though." 

     "Would you, if the positions were reversed?" 

     "I... I... don't know," said Akane almost too quietly
to hear over the background noise. "I think it would depend
a lot on how much I knew before I got too mad to listen
anymore. Maybe a letter... I don't know, Nabiki." 

     "Well, it's something to think about. Along with
everything else. Come on, let's go in. It would be stupid to
be late after all that's happened." 

     They joined the thinning stream of students and went in
to their classes. Neither noticed Kuno standing outside the
doors, watching them through the glass, thoughtfully. 

* * * 

     Giving himself completely to that wonderful, boneless,
relaxing comfort that only a really hot bath can bring,
Ranma remembered more about what he was starting to think of
as his 'adventure at sea.' 

     No wonder the Captain hadn't been too concerned about
Ranma's curse. Everyone was too _busy_ to react very much
after the first surprised gasps when Ranma was inevitably
doused with cold sea water followed by a chorus of shouts
from the Captain and Bosun to get back to work. Naturally
Ranma had to tell the story to the rest of the crew, and of
course there was one who had to be shown that he was a man
despite appearances. 

     Gakaoki was a scarred, tattooed lump of a man with bad
teeth and a worse attitude. He and Ranma had a startlingly
brief, brisk discussion about manners and proper behavior
that didn't damage the boat and left Gakaoki able to work.
After he woke up and had a few new injuries tended to, that
is. This convinced the rest of the crew that bothering Ranma
in girl form was a very _bad_ idea, and didn't bother the
Captain at all. As he loudly proclaimed, this wasn't the
@#$%@# Navy after all, and the men could work out these
little disagreements among themselves so long as the work
got done and no equipment got damaged. 

     Surprisingly there were no grudges held. Surprising to
Ranma, that is, until he realized the other fact about life
at sea. It's very, very dangerous out there and after a few
days of narrow escapes, saving others and being saved in
turn Ranma learned that seamen got along because they _had_
to. Besides, the foul weather gear they all lived in didn't
show much. 

     The work was exhausting and endless. The conditions
were always uncomfortable, sometimes painful and usualy cold
and wet. The company was unwashed, brutal and foul mouthed.
It was a cramped, simple life of work all the time, grab
something to eat during the rare idle moment, sleep a bit
when you can and do what you are told. No rivals wanted to
kill him. No one wanted to marry him... well except for
Gakaoki, but he was really all right once you got to know
him, and he knew some _amazing_ dirty jokes. 

     For the first time in his life Ranma was among men who
were comrades. Men who told good stories and listened to his
stories with interest. He was not alone. He was appreciated
and even sometimes received rough praise as he learned his
job. For a time the martial arts and all his committment to
them were submerged under the need to simply exist from day
to day. It was paradise. 

     Finally the "Drifting Lotus" pulled into Sapporo to
drop its catch, as Captain Furutomo had promised it would.
The Captain recommended a seamen's hostel to Ranma for a
place to get clean, catch some uninterrupted sleep and eat a
few good meals at minimal cost. Then Ranma was paid off. It
was a surprising amount of money but the catch had been good
and Ranma had certainly earned his share. Captain Furutomo
said the boat would be in port for four days and Ranma was
welcome to ship out with him again, if he wanted to. 

     Ranma was tempted, but regretfully turned the Captain
down, telling him he had things to do that couldn't be done
at sea. "I guess you aren't meant to be a seaman right now,
boy, but you've got what it takes. Keep this marlinspike for
luck. You never know when you might need to splice a cable,
or something. Now get off my boat. We've got work to do." 

* * * 

     'And that was that,' thought Ranma. 'I guess Captain
Furutomo doesn't believe in long goodbyes.' 

     Ranma glanced around the street outside the hostel,
adjusted his pack straps and began to stride through the
port section of Sapporo as his thoughts turned again to a
question that he'd been coming back to from time to time.
What do people mean when they say 'manly?' His father had
constantly challenged him to 'be a man.' Until now his only
real example of manhood had been his father. Ranma now
considered his former crewmates. They were, without a doubt,
men. Perhaps he could impress his mother with his manliness
by sharing a few of Gakaoki's jokes with her? 

     Hmm... probably not. Ranma began to chuckle quietly to
himself. The chuckle bubbled up as he imagined his mother's
reaction and burst out as a full blown belly laugh. Suddenly
he realized what he was doing and stopped in surprise. 'Why
am I laughing out loud here in the street? People will think
I'm crazy! Ah... so what?' He resumed walking and let his
laughter run its course. He didn't remember ever feeling
this good or this optimistic, before. 'Even if this doesn't
work out, I think a vacation has been good for me,' he
thought to himself. 'Next time, though, Akane is coming
along. I really miss her.' 

     Spying a coffee shop up ahead, Ranma decided to stop
for coffee and a snack and some planning. Once the cute
waitress seated him, he opened his pack and took out a map
of Hokkaido. Glancing around surreptitiously he pulled a
thin, plastic wrapped bundle of papers from its hiding place
under his shirt. Once they were unwrapped and unfolded it
was obvious that they were xerox copies of pages from a
book. Ranma scanned the papers for a moment and then began
to study his map. "Damn," he muttered to himself. "It's not
on this map, either." 

     When the waitress arrived with his order, he quickly
swept the papers onto the seat beside him and laid the map
on top of them. She seemed to want to stay a while and chat.
This made Ranma uncomfortable. He just didn't understand why
girls always wanted to talk to him and worse... flirt with
him. He was never sure how to respond. Desiring some
privacy, he tried mentioning his fiancee. The waitress
seemed to quickly lose interest and left him alone. She
seemed disappointed, but at least he hadn't made her angry.
'That certainly seemed to go well,' he thought. 'I need to
remember that one.' 

     Sighing, he went back to reading the xerox copies. They
were taken from a historical reference book he had found one
day in the Nerima Library. It sure wasn't much to base a
plan on, but it was all he had: 

--- * * * * --- 

               The Great Houses of Japan 

               A Brief History of Clan Saotome 

Between the middle of the Heiki period until just before the
founding of the Tokugawa Shogunate, Clan Saotome was well
known for fielding units of light calvary in time of war.
Horse archers, in other words, armed with short, recurved
bows in addition to the usual swords of samurai. Because of
this the Clan adopted the horse as their symbol. Clan
tradition said this method of warfare was learned from
mongol survivors of the Great Kahn's abortive attempt to
invade and conquer Japan in the thirteenth century. In
modern times, some of the collateral families of the Clan
even gave their male children names with a horse motif,
although this particular affectation was limited. 

During this early period the great families of Japan
gathered power mainly through the mechanism of the marriage
of one of their daughters to the Emperor, and through
careful alliance with other great houses. The Saotomes only
succeeded twice in their history in gaining the coveted
prize of imperial marriage, but were nevertheless much
sought after for alliance in the sometimes vicious and
bloody jockeying for power that went on constantly during
these centuries. The warriors of Clan Saotome were among the
most feared and respected samurai of those times. 

The main land holdings of Clan Saotome were along the west
coast of Hokkaido near the medieval port town of Korushima.
Because of this location, the Clan always had nearly as much
connection with the sea as they had with the horse. It is
even whispered that the clan sponsored piracy against the
China trade during the period before the Tokugawa era. In
the century after the founding of the Tokugawa Shogunate,
Clan Saotome began to take more of an interest in nautical
affairs. By the time the Tokugawa Shoguns began limiting the
numbers of samurai retainers allowed to the great houses,
the Saotomes were deeply involved in the China trade.
Because of this, the Saotomes had a ready made alternative
to going ronin, as so many former samurai retainers did. An
acceptable profession for one of the samurai class was
ship's officer, and many former retainers of the Saotomes
and allied houses became officers aboard Saotome sponsored
ships engaged in the China trade. 

With crews led by trained warriors, and given the near
anarchy that ruled the seas of that time, the Saotome ships
were as much smugglers and pirates as they were peaceful
traders. Conversely, a saying of the day had it that the
fastest route to a watery grave was to attack a ship flying
the running horse banner of the Saotomes. While the fortunes
of many great houses declined during this period, the
relative prosperity of Japan fueled a high demand for the
goods of the China trade resulting in Clan Saotome and their
interests becoming immensely wealthy. 

This wealth and prosperity translated to great influence
during the years leading up to the founding of what became
known as the Meiji era in the middle of the nineteenth
century. It was during this time that the leadership of the
Saotomes settled on a political policy that was eventually
copied by a few other great houses: "Do not become the
rulers of the nation. Instead, stay in the shadows and
_select_ the rulers of the nation." 

Little is known of Clan Saotome in early modern and modern
times. This writer was only able to document a single
instance of probable Clan Saotome influence in national
affairs. A founding member of the board of regents of Tokyo
University was one "Ranma Saotome," but nothing is known of
this individual beyond a single reference. Note the horse
motif of this man's first name. It is possible he was a
member of the Clan of the same name, rather than one of the
many families' Saotome who have no current connection with
the ancient Clan. 

--- * * * * --- 

     Ranma recalled the way his heart had speeded up when he
reached the end of the article and found that name. Now, if
only he could find this Korushima place. Why wasn't it on
any of the maps he'd checked? 'This would be a hell of a lot
easier if I could just ask Pop about our family. He's never,
ever answered a question about that, though. Usually, he'd
just change the subject to martial arts and start a
"training" session that involved a lot of banging on my head
whenever I asked about that. Oh well. Sapporo is a big city.
I wonder where the main library is?' Staring at the thin
sheaf of papers in his hand, Ranma thought about what he
might find at the end of his journey. 

* * * 

     "Shampoo, my love! I must embrace you, tender -- urk!"
Mousse's words were abruptly cut off as... 

     "Stupid Mousse!" *CRASH* "Stupid, blind... leave me
alone!" 

     Cologne looked out of the kitchen to see a very angry
Shampoo standing over an unconscious Mousse. His head was
embedded in the floor. Shampoo was flushed and breathing
heavily. "Shampoo, dear, was it really necessary to damage
the floor like that?" 

     "Yes! It was!" Shampoo whirled to face Cologne. "What
it matter to you?!" 

     Cologne gazed calmly into Shampoo's glaring eyes.
"Well, it's just that we'll have to fix it, now. The floor I
mean. Are you all right, Shampoo?" 

     "Fine! Err... Um, sorry, Great-grandmother. Shampoo is
fine. Shampoo is also sorry about floor." 

     "Not to worry, Dear. Mousse will fix it once he's up
and around again." As she spoke, Mousse began to wake up and
struggle to free his head. "You!" Her staff flashed out and
whapped him on the back of the head. "Just lie there for a
while until Shampoo gets over being angry at you." 

     Mousse's voice was muffled by the floor as he started
to say, "All right. I'll just rest here a mom -- HUH!" 

     "Shut up, stupid Mousse!" said Shampoo as she drew her
foot back to kick him again. 

     Cologne inturrupted. "You seem a bit tense, Shampoo
dear. Why don't you take some time off and go have a nice
nap?" 

     Shampoo glanced at Cologne and back at Mousse. She
reluctantly lowered her foot. With her head bowed slightly
she said, "Shampoo thanks you, Great-grandmother. I do that
now." She walked slowly toward the back of the restaurant
and the stairs. 

     Cologne, watching her carefully, asked, "Have you been
able to learn anything more about Son-in-law, Shampoo?" 

     Shampoo slammed to a stop and stood tensely with her
hands clenched into fists at her sides. "No,
Great-grandmother. Not yet. Shampoo is still trying." 

     "Very well. Let me know when you find out anything. I
hope you feel better after your nap, Shampoo. Sleep well." 

     "Thank you. Shampoo try." She resumed her trip up the
stairs to her room. 

     'Something's bothering that girl,' thought Cologne to
herself. She shook her head thoughtfully and returned to her
work in the kitchen. 

* * * 

     Early morning. Mousse's steps thundered as he ran down
the stairs toward the kitchen. "Shampoo. Are you in here?"
He looked blearily around the kitchen for his love. "Ah,
there you are!" He ran to hug his Shampoo only to be thumped
in the chest with the end of Cologne's staff. He flew
backward into the wall with a crash. 

     "Don't play with me, boy. Does this mean that Shampoo
isn't upstairs?" 

     "No! I can't find her, anywhere! Do you know where she
is?" 

     Cologne didn't know where Shampoo was. Neither did
Mousse. Shampoo didn't return that day... or the next... or
the next. 

* * * 

     It was just past dawn and Akane was out on her morning
run. What was most significant was that she was running
along the fence tops rather than along the ground. She ran
this way until she came to within six blocks of the Tendo
home, then hopped down to run along the ground. She also
slowed down a bit. The other significant thing was her
clothing. She wore Ranma's red Chinese style shirt and black
pants. She had taken to wearing them, sometimes, a few days
after Ranma's departure. 

     Akane suddenly felt... something... danger? Without a
second thought, she bounced into a high leap into the air
as... 

     "Saotome! You fiend! What have you done with
Shampoo!!??" 

     Two chains with sharpened hooks attached flashed past,
under Akane's feet. She tucked into a ball and tumbled over
as she came back down. She landed on her feet with the
chains caught in her hands. She instantly yanked Mousse
toward her as she stepped back two steps keeping tension on
the chains. She then spun in place and pulled Mousse right
off his feet and into the air as she cracked the chains like
a whip. Or she would have if Mousse hadn't slammed into the
concrete wall behind her. She dropped the chains and jumped
to where Mousse was embedded in the wall, and took up a
stance to snap a punch into the back of his head if he began
to move. "Mousse, you idiot! Do I sound like Ranma, to you?"

     "Who is that? Is that Akane Tendo? I thought I saw
Saotome!" 

     "Yes! I'm Akane. I'm wearing a red shirt and black
pants. You must have thought I was Ranma. Why did you attack
me, Mousse?" 

     "Shampoo! She's gone. Saotome must have done something
to her! I'll kill him when I see him!" 

     "You fool! Ranma's been gone for over three weeks. How
could he do anything to Shampoo?" 

     "I don't know, but it must have been him. She's gone, I
tell you. Where is she? Do you know anything?" 

     "No. I didn't know anything about this until just now.
Gone, you say?" 

     "Yes. She's been missing for several days. I can't find
her or anything about where she might have gone." Mousse
groaned in pain. "What happened to me? How did I get in this
wall?" 

     "Gods, Mousse, you're an idiot and blind, too! Didn't
you see the truck that hit you when you stepped into the
street?" 

     "Didn't see anything. Don't feel good either. I think
I'll rest a little." 

     "You do that, Mousse. You really should pay more
attention, you know. Traffic's real dangerous around here in
the mornings." 

     "Ok. Thanks. I'll do that. Bye bye, then." 

     "Right." Akane kept an eye on Mousse as she backed away
from him, then she turned and trotted off down the street. 

     "Hmmm, that seemed to go pretty well," she muttered to
herself. "I guess weapons _are_ a disadvantage against an
anything goes fighter." Akane felt very good as she shifted
to a faster run toward home, a bath and breakfast. 

* * * 

     Akane was taking off her shoes in the entrance way of
the Tendo home when she heard a quiet scratching behind her.
She looked out the door and saw P-chan walking aimlessly
around the house as if looking for a way in. She slipped her
feet into a pair of wooden sandals and ran, with a clacking
sound over to the little, black Pig. "P-chan!" she cried, as
she scooped him up in her arms. "Oh, P-chan, I've missed you
so much." 

     She looked the little pig in the eye and said, "Where
have you been all this time, you bad boy?" 

     Somehow, P-chan managed to look sheepish and
appologetic. 

     "Well, it doesn't matter. You're here now, P-chan." She
hugged him between her breasts. 

     P-chan snuggled up and sighed. 

     "I have a surprise for you, P-chan." As she talked,
Akane walked around to the back of the house. 

     "See, P-chan? Isn't it wonderful?" She was standing
beside the completed 'thing' next to the house. Her 'secret
project.' 

     The pig tried to crane his head around, but couldn't
see much except it was some sort of wood structure. 

     "It's a surprise I made for you, P-chan. I hope you
like it!" Akane lifted up the top half of the gate with one
hand and gently set P-chan down inside the hexagonal
structure with the other. Akane said, "This is going to be
your new home, P-chan. I built it real strong so you can't
accidently get out and get lost, again." She dropped the top
half of the gate back into place with a very sturdy (and
final) sounding *thump*. 

     P-chan trotted over and pushed tentatively at the gate.
It didn't even wiggle. He pushed harder. Nothing. He stood
on his back legs and slammed his front hooves into the gate.
No movement at all. He squealed in alarm and ran around the
inside of the pen on the concrete floor, pushing at the
walls. 

     "Oh! That's so cute. You really like your new home,
don't you, P-chan? Look at that. He can't wait to look the
whole thing over! I think you'll just love it here, P-chan!"

     Kasumi came out of the house to see what was happening.
"Oh my, is P-chan back?" 

     "Hi Kasumi. Yeah, P-chan's back and I'm showing him his
new home." 

     Kasumi smiled broadly. "So that's what your surprise
was. A pen for P-chan. It's a very nice one, Akane. It's
real... er... strong, isn't it?" 

     "It sure is! That's so he can't get out and accidently
get lost, again. This way, I can be sure he'll stay here so
I can take real good care of him." 

     The two Tendo sisters stood together, and watched
P-chan as he frantically ran around and around in the pen.
They both smiled broadly at his antics. Kasumi with her
usual, calm smile. Akane's smile transformed her face into a
thing of beauty, as always, unless... that is, unless a
person looked closely and noticed she was showing a few more
teeth than usual. 

* * * 



-- Listar MIME Decryption --------------

Bob Barnes 
rbarnes@moscow.com 
Moscow, Idaho 

"Absent some moment of clarity that none of us can imagine
coming along, we'll enter the millennium at warp speed with
our culture continuing to crumble just as our mainframes go
kablooey trying to figure out what day it is."

-- Robert X. Cringely