It's silly.  But then, I'm me.


                           Ranma 1/2: The Bet
                        When Alterverses Collide

                                   by
                               Josh Green


   Toltiir looked at the aging, overweight god with a thick accent.  The
accent wasn't all that happy about being here.  "Are you..."

   "I am Scotty, God of Technobabble and Convient Plot Devices."

   "And you have an entry for The Bet?"

   "Aye, I do."  Scotty pulled a small box out of his pocket and spoke
into it.  "Beam them down."

                                *******

   "Behold, the legendary training grounds of Jusenkyou!"

   "This doesn't look so tough."

                                  ***

Meanwhile:

   "...and this is where we control reality.  The machine in front of
you keeps track of the decisions made in the mortal world and makes
sure that new universes are spawned when the decision has a great
enough significance."  *Showing the newbies the ropes was always a
pain,* the god thought to himself.

   "All you have to do is sit here and make sure that those red lights
there don't start blinking.  And whatever you do, don't pull this lever.
That shuts down the spawning protocals."

   After the manager left, the newcomer immediately set down in a
well-padded chair and put his feat up.

   A box of donuts suddenly appeared in a cascade of blue light.

   "Mmm... donut."

   Reaching for the donuts, the godling overextended himself and lost
his balance.  His other hand shot out, attempting to stop his fall, but
only managing to pull down a large lever.

   The almost-bald entity looked around as red lights flashed and sirens
wailed.  He summed it up with one word.

   "D'oh!"

                                *******

Later:

   Souun Tendou stared at the postcards.

   The mailman had just dropped off a large sack filled with
panda-bearing postcards, all with the same message on them.

   'Bringing Ranma from China.  Saotome'

   A large sweatdrop formed on his head.

                                  ***

   A young red-haired girl wearing Chinese clothing ran past a crowd of
pedestrians, followed closely by a large panda.  So surprised were they
that they almost missed seeing the very handsome young man with
identical clothing being chased by another panda.

   Two pandas ran out of side streets, crashed into each other, and took
off down the street.

   A cat, duck, and rabbit raced by with a wolf, tiger, and mongoose on
their tails.

   A girl with a flaming aura flew past, keeping slightly ahead of a
gigantic minotaur.

   By this time the crowd had dispersed, the people wisely deciding to
go home and look for their medication.  Nobody was around to see the
hundred and one lemmings.

                                *******

Future scenes:

[Ranmas meet the Tendou sisters, but there's not enough room in the house
for all of them.]

[Ryouga finds Ranma again and again and again...]

[Shampoo finds herself surrounded by Ranmas and dies a very happy
woman.]

[Nodoka arrives and wonders when the Tendou family bought a zoo.]

[Each of the Ranmas eventually finds a girl and they decide to retreat
from society to an area near Jusenkyou, forming a new tribe called the
Aiel.]

P.S. You can thank Flashman for the opening bit.  'Give me a donut'
     indeed.  And if Mark Doherty happens to read this, whatever
     happened to "Neko"?!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Josh Green, aka Pi -- SORT@BUCKET.UALR.EDU
       http://bucket.ualr.edu/~sort/fanfic/
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