At 12:49 PM 9/1/98 PDT, Always Man wrote:

    "Running Deer is _last_ person that Shampoo would call soft," 
she said with a smile.  Finished lacing up her boots, Shampoo stood 
up.  "Let's go show these soft Japanese a couple of _real_ fighters!"

You're in danger of wandering. Keep focused. Wrap up other-Shampoo's 
situation and dispense with the new characters--they serve no purpose.

	Hmm.. anyone notice the IP address in the header to this? Quote
'X-Originating-IP: [24.112.33.4]' 

	'Always Man' has the same Originating IP address as 'Guy Smiles' & 'Guy
Under The Bridge'. (Yes, I checked. I still have trashed email from both
that I hadn't yet deleted, and I compared them.)

	As Mulder would say.. 'The truth is out there.' Or at the very least, it's
in your email headers, Herr Troll.

	You sound like a very angry and bitter person, friend. Perhaps you tried
to write something and were told yourself that it was bad? I suppose the
reason doesn't matter, anymore than it matters as to why Bill Gates feels
he has to rule the entire computer world by crushing all potential opposition.

	The thing to do is to be helpfully creative. If you see something in a fic
you think doesn't work, don't just point it out, offer a solution! If a
phrase doesn't scan for you, try suggesting what YOU would have written had
you been in the author's place.

	They may or may not use it, but such offerings turn an otherwise
irritating 'I think this fic sucks' letter into a useful, thoughtful and
idea-promoting piece of literary commentary.

	Many times I've re-written portions of my "Legion's Quest" series based on
suggestions offered to me by both the FFML and by my pre-readers. There
have been turns of phrase that I've missed simply because I was too closely
focused on the story to see them. The old 'forrest-tree' problem, you know.
Because they were kind enough to not only point OUT the flaws, but offer
suggested fixes, my stories improved dramatically. 

	Don't believe me? Want an example? The mecha fight scene between myself
and the Knight Sabers in 'Tangled Skeins' was partially written by Darren
Steffler and John Collins, both pre-readers of mine. They were both kind
enough to point out flaws in the original, and offer samples of how THEY
would write such a scene.

	This resulted in the DRASTIC revision of that scene, and even the direct
inclusion of large pieces of what _they_ had written.

	Yes, I freely admit that, and without any shame. Read the author's notes
at the end, and you're notice that I give them both credit for what they
did, and what they offered me.

	But I forget.. you don't _read_ self-insert stories, do you? Well, to a
certain extent, you're right. Many of them are badly written, and ALL are
wish-fulfillment. But is there anything wrong with wanting to see your
dreams come true, even if only in a little piece of fiction?

	As it is, you're missing some wonderful works. Ah, well.. your loss, lad.

	As for me? I give _every_ story, and every TYPE of story at least one
chance. You never know. Catbert is often ragged on for his misspellings and
occasionally awkward phrasing, yet his story 'Reluctant Fiancee' was both
original, and highly entertaining. A type of Ranma story that had never (to
my knowledge) been done before, and the idea itself was done skillfully.
Despite the occasional spelling error and lapse of grammar here and there,
I found it wonderfully entertaining.

	A story I would have missed, had I adopted such a strict and severe
attitude towards fan fiction as, say.. Guy Under The Bridge, or Guy Smiles.

	I gave him some encouragement, and pointed out what errors I could,
offering suggestions on how *I* would fix such problems, and it improved
even more.

	Result, a better story was born, and I was rewarded with the opportunity
to see a young writer become a better writer. In itself, a great pleasure.

	But I begin to ramble and digress. This isn't a soapbox I stand on, it's
an open forum, for writers who wish to learn and grow in their craft. So I
stand aside to make way for new stories and the resulting commentary on
them, as opposed to my somewhat senile rantings.

	Just a little philosophy from a tired old soldier. Take it with a grain of
salt.

	Edward Becerra


	"Dreamers may die, but the Dream is eternal.."