Young At Heart- The Bet
interp by me, pebble supplied by Krista Perry, pond by
 Rumiko Takahashi.
	"K'nichi wa, y'all. Excuse me, I is from Kansai
not Arkhansaw...Thank you. Oh dear, now I've got a Brit
accent. Oh well. This is a standard disclaimer, my good
fellows, that the author of this piece does not in any
way own the various trademarks or copyrights upon the
characters or worlds within. This particular 'work' is
included among the storyarc of 'the Bet' due to the 
inspiration of the talented Krista Perry, whose skill
as a wordsmith I can appreciate, even if she failed to
see that Ranchan's best choice in a fiancee was NOT
Akane Tendo. Eh, stick to the script? How droll.
	"In any case, we now join the Japanese
Susano-o (the "Heart Of Ice" version, not the "Blue
Seed" version) in a short (gotta be due to mail 
limits on AOL, ne?) one-act story.
	"Someone want to adjust the Universal Translator
before Zen catches me speaking in a manner more 
befitting 'Masterpiece Theatre'? Ow, wot's that? Aw,
krickey. Now I'n speakin' Cockney? That's it mates,
I'm outta here."
--------------------------------------------
	The god Susano-o looked on as gods, demons, and
other powerful beings did what such beings have done for
millenia. They meddled.

	Here a timeline was skewed to show the Space
Battlecruiser Yamato defending Earth against the 
Zentraedi. Here another timeline was altered so that
Gendo Ikari added a second control to the clone 
self-destruct sequence resulting in a failsafe in 
case someone unauthorized by him tried to derail his
plans.

	Here another timeline was altered, and Akane
Tendo watched as the Yamato-no-orochi bit down on the
scrap of flesh that had once been Ranma Saotome. A
change of a microscopic bit of DNA in the beginning of
a pregnancy, and Nabiki and Kasumi Tendo gained a 
younger brother who was NOT engaged to Ranma Saotome
when the time came.

	Other timelines saw the Moon Princess die in
her first battle, and other heroes step forward to 
take the places vacated. And so on. A tiny change
that snowballed as it caused further and further changes
which fed back into crazy loops and coils.

	Susano-o looked with fondness upon the one 
called Akane Tendo. Perhaps he could come up with a 
permanent timeline in which she and this Ranma Saotome
were NOT linked as strongly. Then he could always do
a little work for that Goddess Relief Office and arrange
to grant her wish...Maybe even arrange something like
that Belldandy had done over in the Norse section.

	Yes, here was a good place to start. Besides,
if that didn't work out, he was counting on the one
over in the Orochi-eats-Ranma timeline to go for the
violent teenager. Being a god sometimes had its perks.
-----------------------------------------
	"I've got it," the child version of Ryouga 
grabbed the mushroom and swallowed it in a single bite
before Tatewaki Kuno could sneak it off Ranma's grill.

	Ryouga abruptly grew, changing from a six year
old to a seventeen year old in seconds. He smirked at
Ranma, still a child, and he'd stay that way.

	"Poor Ranma," Ryouga kicked out, catching the
shocked Ranma on the chin. "Weak, clumsy, childish,
Ranma." Ryouga watched as Ranma landed, clumsily,
without the coordination he'd have later in life.

	Ryouga controlled his impulse to force his
rival to eat dirt, to revel in his helplessness. He
could simply eliminate Ranma as his rival, and this
would be much more suitable.

	Ryouga went inside the house to tell Akane that 
Ranma had a little fall. Then it was time to cook a few
mushrooms. The furo should still be plenty warm.
--------------
	"Ryouga."

	Ryouga looked over at Nabiki. He didn't trust
Nabiki, but then NOBODY trusted Nabiki. He turned back
to his pack. New supplies were always among his first
priority when he had the chance to restock. "What is it?"

	"You know Akane's looking all over for those
mushrooms?" Nabiki flinched slightly as another crash
indicated Akane's progress. This had been going on for
the past six hours, ever since she'd brought little 
Ranma back into the house.

	"Yeah, she's already asked me to pick up more
the next time I find it." Ryouga grinned. Like there
was any chance of THAT happening. Still, he promised,
so he'd do it. He just would make sure none of them
were capable of growing any further.

	The usual little fantasy appeared in Ryouga's
mind, of Mrs Akane Hibiki, hugging her husband - so sad
that they were bidding little Ranma-chan goodbye. Said
child being hauled off to an all-girl's reform school.
Ryouga offering a few words of comfort to Akane as the
screaming little brat was hauled away and out of his 
life. Ryouga smiled.

	"Ryouga? Are you listening to me?" Nabiki waved
her hand in front of his face. "Ryouga?"

	"Huh? Did you say something, Nabiki?"

	"If you bring back the mushrooms this week, I
won't tell Akane about you being the one to destroy the
mushrooms."

	"You...know?" Ryouga's fantasy abruptly changed,
and he was being driven out of the house by a furious
Akane and a laughing little Ranma.

	"The little scene you had earlier with Akane
pleading with you to try, your gallant acceptance of the
quest, with Ranma freaking out through the whole thing,
oh, it was quite touching." Nabiki said with a dry
sarcasm. "It was all I could do to keep a straight face
through it. Suggestion: never play poker, you're way
too easy to read. So you cooked the mushrooms, and
they won't grow anymore. That gives us six of these
6cm mushrooms, three 4cm mushrooms, and one 39cm
mushroom. If I let Akane know what you've done,
I think she'll forcefeed you a 4cm one. That's my
deal though, I won't tell her if you bring back
the appropriate length of mushrooms within the week."

	"I don't know when I'll find the 'Number Of 
Years' mushroom forest..." Ryouga's voice trailed off.

	"Better get started then." Nabiki smirked. 
(smirk #7, "I've got you where I want you.")

	Ryouga silently shouldered his pack. This could
be bad.
-----------------------
	Nabiki, being more generous than was usual for
her, gave Ryouga nearly a month. During that time, 
nearly everyone in Nerima had heard about Ranma's 
problem. Nabiki had sold the information, of course,
and had waited more than a week before the amount of
yen being offered for details of where Ranma had gone
overwhelmed her desire to keep the whole thing secret.

	Not that Nabiki was ever really into secrets.

	The reaction was mixed. Akane had just learned
that "Little Ranma" was even more prone to speak without
thinking, and had blurted out P-chan's secret under some
goading from Nabiki. Nabiki had compounded the shock by
the revelation that Ryouga was the one who had cooked the
mushrooms, making sure that Ranma was stuck as a child.

	Almost everyone was sure that Akane was not 
really going to make pork cutlets. At least they had
a reasonable doubt that Akane would actually kill 
someone. Not that anyone wanted to be anywhere near
Ground Zero when P-chan met Akane the next time.

	Mousse and Tatewaki had both declared that 
they would keep an eye out for Ryouga to warn him, up
until Kuno found out that Ryouga had also done this to
the pig-tailed girl. The Blue Thunder had immediately
sworn vengeance, and everyone concerned was quite happy
to learn that among Kuno's many faults, pedophilia was
NOT on the list.

	Kasumi's attitude had changed. It appeared that
she would be a good mother later on. Certainly she 
enjoyed taking care of children. Never mind that the
child in question did NOT want to be dressed up in
"Hello Kitty" overalls or to have her hair brushed.

	Once Kasumi was getting ready to give Ranma-chan
a bath but Akane interceded, to Ranma's considerable 
relief.

	Akane had merely flinched when Doctor Tofu
had examined Ranma (shortly after Nabiki had 
released the information, since it was no longer
secret, there was no longer a reason to put it off.)
Tofu had observed that Ranma's neurochemistry had also
reverted to six-year old developmental levels. He
acted like a child because his brain had less of the
creases and resulting neural capacity of the more
adult brain. 

	Akane had mumbled something about not noticing
a difference, but her heart hadn't really been in it.

	Ranma had "zombied out" for most of the month,
up until the point right after Tofu's explanation, when
Akane had held Ranma and nearly cried her eyes out. The
two of them had spent nearly two hours holding each 
other and crying.

	Cologne had come by shortly after learning of
this latest disaster to hit Ranma, staring at the child 
and asking questions. She'd flinched when she'd heard 
where the mushrooms had come from.

	"So do you know where it is?" Akane was hopeful.

	"Yes, it is near the Spring Of Time." Cologne 
sighed sadly as she looked at her "son-in-law." "How 
long has he been like this?"

	"One week, five days." Nabiki didn't trust 
Cologne but they had developed respect for each other's
skills. Nabiki as a sneak and manipulator (Cologne could
outmanipulate Nabiki, but was impressed that someone so
young had developed her skills to that level), whereas
Cologne was a storehouse of esoteric information to 
Nabiki.

	"Ah." Cologne shook her head. "Well, there's no
reason for us to stay in Japan then."

	"WHAT?!?" Soun, Genma, Akane, and Nabiki made
an oddly harmonious chorus.

	"Oh my." Kasumi stopped sewing a patch onto
Ranma's overalls. Ranma was just grateful it was not
another "Hello Kitty" decal. Not that "Sailor V" was
much better.

	"The people of the forest do not eat of those
mushrooms. Do you know why?" Cologne met their gaze
one by one. "If it were simple youthening, you'd think
they'd eat them all the time and be forever young, or
some reasonable facsimile. They don't though, you 
yourself related how Hibiki said he'd been warned off."

	"..." Ranma-chan, currently a little girl who
was wearing pink overalls decorated with bunnies, made
a whimpering noise in the back of her throat. She could
tell she wasn't going to like this.

	"Memory loss," said Doctor Tofu, trying very
hard to focus on what was going on and not lose it 
from the presence of Kasumi. "The brain's architecture
isn't very complicated at that age level."

	"Exactly." Cologne shook her head. She didn't
notice that she was discussing the child's fate in
front of said individual, in the manner of adults 
ignoring a quiet child's presence everywhere. "The child
may have only lost a few memories so far, but this will
increase rapidly without treatment.

	"Which is why I am suggesting that we take the
child back to China with us."

	"WHAT?!?" The chorus was almost identical to the
first one, except that Kasumi was in on it this time.

	Cologne held up a gnarled hand. "Consider that
we have various shiatsu and memory-enhancing techniques
available to us there. It is unlikely that we can get
them from China to here before the memory loss is too
great. And if you do keep the child here, what then?"

	"Couldn't we just get a 16cm mushroom if you
know where the Forest is?" Akane refused to give up 
hope.

	"Child," Cologne shook her head, "the Number
Of Years Forest is not something you can find easily.
Like many magical sites, it tends to keep its borders
closed to those seeking it out, and it has its guardians
as well."

	"But..."

	"I'll send Shampoo, if you like. I'm not as
quick as I used to be, and I doubt we could trust
Mousse even though his duck form allows him to traverse
mountains fairly quickly. It still would take too long, 
even sending Mousse, at least another two weeks. At 
that point I'd expect the personality of my son-in-law
to have completely been lost. He will have become a 
child completely."

	Akane hugged the little girl who was sitting
there with tears tracking from her eyes, and stroked
the girl's hair. "Don't worry, Ranma, I'll find a cure
for you, somehow."
--------------------------
	"Kodachi attempted to kidnap Little Ranma
again," Nabiki growled. One of her best outfits had
a ragged hole where she'd barely avoided the Black 
Rose's ribbon. This had been going on for most of
the week since the terrible fate of Ranma had become
common knowledge.

	"If Mrs Saotome hadn't taken little Ranko
out to pick up some nice dresses..." Kasumi smiled. 
She had just finished putting some more touches on
Ranma's room. Having a little boy/girl around was so
much fun.

	"Yeah. It could have gotten messy." Nabiki
looked around. "Where's Akane?"

	"I think she's in the dojo. She blew up at
Father again today. I think it was the moustache burn
that Ranma got from that last 'moustache noogie.'
Father is so enthusiastic about having children around
the house again."

	"Better him than me," Nabiki quoted.

	"Yes, I remember the moustache attack too." 
Kasumi smiled.

	"So does Mrs Saotome....?" Nabiki paused.

	"She knows about the curse, of course, and that
Ranko is Ranma and that he's already forgotten most of
what he's gone through in the past few years. He's 
fighting but..."

	"But he's losing." Nabiki shuddered. Bad enough
to have to fight for your life, but to be constantly
fighting to retain your identity. To Nabiki, who had
always fought for control of her life, what Ranma was
going through was filed under "Fates Worse Than Death."

	"She's looking at it as a way to erase the 
damage done by Mr Saotome." Kasumi sighed. "Akane is
taking it really hard that Mrs Saotome will be taking
Ranma back with her soon."

	"Cologne is still objecting, stating that the
best care for her 'son-in-law' is to be had among the
amazons. At least if he goes to Juuban, he won't be
a target for Kodachi." Nabiki thought she saw movement
out the window. "Hey, isn't that Ukyou? What the heck
is she doing sneaking down from...Akane's room?"

	"Excuse me, Nabiki, but isn't that one of the
mushrooms that Akane had put aside?" Kasumi blinked as
the two watched the event transpiring outside the house.
"Oh my."
---------------
	"Yay, Ucchan!"

	"Come back here, you jackass!"

	Akane watched the two children at play, a 
wistful expression on her face. Ukyou had proven that
she loved Ranma, and it might not have been an "ultimate
sacrifice" but it was a considerable one.

	Mousse and Cologne had left, trying to find
out what had happened to Shampoo in the month she had
left Japan. It had been a rather long and painful 
month, the second one of which Ranma had been a child.

	The personality disintegration had not been
nearly as bad as had been feared. Noticeable, but not
a complete fragmentation of identity. He was still 
Ranma, still the baka.

	Which brought her here, under the watching 
eyes of Ranma's mother, as both of them watched the
two children playing in the yard.

	Nodoka Saotome's gaze met those of Akane Tendo.
Loss was communicated and grief. Resolution in Akane's
eyes met understanding in Nodoka's eyes.

	Akane brought the mushroom to her lips, and ate.

	Nabiki, unseen by either, got the last picture
of her sister as a teenager for a long time to come.
--------------------------
	When Ryouga found out, he could have performed
a Perfect Shishi Hokoudan that would have leveled a 
good part of Tokyo.
--------------------------
	Susano-o rubbed his eyes and wondered just why
he hadn't seen this coming.

	Smiling at a thought, he waited until the Akane
in the Orochi timeline had grieved for the loss of Ranma,
then pulled in a favor from a certain Norse deity. Then
came a short wait for a certain Akane Tendo to use 
the phone. Susano-o was ready.

	Urd was more than happy to assist.

	Unfortunately, Urd being Urd, while the two did
get together in at least one timeline, there were other
...complications. 

	And THAT, as they say, is another story entirely.
==================================


not quite satisfied with this one. i lopped off a lot
 of things that just made it too complicated, but it
 still just doesn't quite do it. maybe it's because i
 wanted to end this on a WAFFy note and i can't recall
 any WAFFy moments in my life to relate it to...
but isn't that why we've got fantasy?