I tried posting this a day or so ago, but I'm not sure if it did.
My apologies if you have already seen this.


(Fade in to dark screen)
(Block lettering appears, in sync with an announcer who sounds 
suspiciously like
Ryoji Kaji.)

Announcer: HOW TO SPEAK NERV DOUBLE-TALK.

(Cut to scene of Eva unit-01 going berserk, and beating the tar out of 
Sachiel.)

Announcer: SCUFFLE.

(Cut to a series of scenes of Gendo Ikari, the first of him standing 
with his hands
behind his back, then sliding his glasses up his nose, and finally, 
staring out towards
the viewer behind steepled hands.)

Announcer: BASTARD.

( Cut to scene of Misato and Pen-pen knocking back a can of beer each. 
Camera
zooms in to show mountain of cans behind them.)

Announcer: BEER.

(Cut to close up of Misato's hand as it slams down a beer can. On the 
can the words
'YEBISU' can be read.)

Announcer: YEBISU. NERV DOUBLE-TALK FOR BEER.
     Brought to you by Yebisu Breweries, Nara-2, Japan.

(Voice in background, is faint but still loud enough to be heard): Kaji, 
are YOU in
THERE!? Come OUT here RIGHT now!!

(Fade to black as faint protests and sounds of property damage  are 
heard.)

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Ash.

"Good morning, doctors. I have taken the liberty of removing Windows
95 from my hard drive."
The winning entry in a 'What ere HAL's first words' contest judged by
'2001: A Space Odyssey' creator Arthur C. Clarke.

"...But cats are sneaky," I added.
She tossed her head, raised a paw and studied it.
"There are certain pleasures to be had in lurking."
"For cats," I added.
"...and certain knowledges gained."
"Such as...?"
 Snuff and Graymalk from,
     A Night In The Lonesome October


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