Very nice.  This is a story I've been wanting to read for a while, and I'm glad somebody finally wrote it.  : )   I liked it a lot, although it could use a thorough grammar and spelling check.  Fortunately, the writing was such that most of the time I understood what you *meant* instead of what you *said.*  ^_^  With a bit of polishing, this could go from very nice to exquisite.  I only wish I had the time go through it line by line and proofread for you.  Still, I just wanted to offer a bit of encouragement, and say that I really enjoyed the thought and emotion behind the story.  Ryo-Oki's feelings about Ryoko were especially poignant.

Krista Perry