Ranma 1/2 created by Rumiko Takahashi and owned by
whoever she sold it to.
Warning: This is a lemon fanfic, that is to say that it
contains sexual situations. If this offends you, or if you are
not a legal adult in your area, then don't read this. If you
do, then I'm not responsible.
Not Ranma 1/2 vol 1 part 2
Lemon Tea
By Andy Wennersten
The birds chirped as the sun rose over the Tendo
Dojo.
Nabiki yawned and opened her eyes to see Ranko
sleeping peacefully next to her. She gently nudged the girl in
an effort to wake her.
Ranko moaned and rolled over. "I don't wanna go
to school today." she said in her sleep.
Nabiki giggled and nudged her harder.
Ranko moaned louder and rolled onto her back.
"Go away, Yoiko. We're supposed to be on vacation." she
said, still asleep.
Nabiki was faintly annoyed at being mistaken for
another woman. She was tempted to push Ranko off the
bed and onto the floor, but came up with a better idea.
"Wake up, Sleeping Beauty." Nabiki said and gave her a
kiss.
Ranko smiled and opened her eyes. "Good morning,
Love." she said.
"That depends. Why did you think Yoiko was
waking you?" Nabiki asked with a serious look on her face.
"Err...it's not what you think." Ranko said. "She's
usually the one that has to drag me out of bed."
"Relax, Ranko, baby." Nabiki said with a grin.
"You're past love life doesn't bother me. Actually, I think
it's kind of a turn on."
"Hate to disappoint you." Ranko said. "Yoiko is
one of the most heterosexual people I know."
"Homophobic?" Nabiki asked.
"We wouldn't be friends if she was." Ranko replied.
"It doesn't bother her that I like girls as well as guys. It's
just not something she would ever want to do."
"What about you as a guy?" Nabiki asked.
"If we were strangers, maybe." Ranko answered.
"But since we've known each other since we were children,
she'll always think of me as a girl."
"Probably just as well." Nabiki said. �If her reaction
to the opposite sex is anything like Ryoga's, then taking her
virginity will prove difficult."
"Oh, I solved that problem." Ranko said offhandedly.
"No more nosebleeds for her."
"You mean she's not a virgin!" Nabiki said. "Wait a
minute. I thought you said she's got the hots for Kuno.
What will her boyfriend think?"
"What boyfriend? It was a one night stand." Ranko
said.
"So how did you calm her down enough to get
fucked?" Nabiki asked.
"It's amazing what you can do with pressure points."
Ranko said with a grin. "Care for a demonstration?"
"I'll have to take a raincheck." Nabiki answered. "I
got to get back in my own bedroom before anyone notices."
�You're saying we got to keep it a secret?!?" Ranko
said with a hurt look on her face.
"It's not that I don't love you. It's just that I can't go
say 'Hi, Daddy. Ranko and I are in love. Hope you don't
mind that we're both girls.' The shock might kill him. Or
me."
"I see your point." Ranko said. "Okay, for now it's
our secret. But don't expect me to go to any great lengths
to keep it."
"Good enough for me." Nabiki said and gathered up
her clothes. She opened up the door to find herself face to
face with Kasumi.
"Oh, my!" Kasumi said.
"Oh, hell." Nabiki said.
"Oh, shit." Ranko said.
"Nabiki, please tell me you haven't been doing what
I think you've been doing." Kasumi said, her eyes darting
back and forth between the two naked girls.
"Um...well..." For the first time in her life, Nabiki
couldn't think of what to say.
"I think Father will want to hear about this."
Kasumi said and started to head towards Soun's room.
"Wait! You can't!" Nabiki yelled.
"Why not?" Kasumi asked.
"Kasumi, you're one of only three people that I
truly respect. So don't make me do something I'll regret."
Nabiki said.
"Like what?" Kasumi asked.
"Like Mayaka." Nabiki answered.
Kasumi froze in her tracks. "You wouldn't."
"If you tell Daddy about my love life, then I'll tell
him about yours."
"Very well. I'll overlook this 'incident'." Kasumi
said with a defeated tone.
"And any others." Nabiki added.
"On one condition. How did you find out about me
and Mayaka?" Kasumi asked.
"You and she did a good job of keeping your
relationship a secret. But you were careless at her
graduation party."
"That was our last time together."
"I'm sorry. I didn't know." Nabiki said.
"It's not important." Kasumi said. "I suggest both
of you take baths before breakfast. Separately, if you don't
mind. Ranko, I'll speak with you later." Then she left to
take care of her chores.
"Nabiki?" Ranko asked. "Let me see if I got this
straight. Mayaka is..."
"Kasumi's girlfriend from high school." Nabiki
replied.
"Kasumi...and another woman? Now that's
something I wouldn't have expected."
"I was as surprised as you." Nabiki said. "But, like
I said, I respect her, so I didn't want to use that information
unless absolutely necessary."
"You said you only respect three people?"
"Until I met you it was two people." Nabiki said
with a grin.
"I'm flattered." Ranko said. "Who's the third
person?"
"N..." Nabiki stopped herself. Ranko wasn't
supposed to know about Nodoka. "Err...I mean Nabiki.
Me, that is."
"Ooh, self respect. I like that in my women."
Ranko said.
"I'm not your woman. If anything, you're mine."
Nabiki said coldly.
"It was just an expression."
"I know, I'm just teasing." Nabiki said, smiling.
"Well, I get the bathroom first. I'll call you when I'm done."
Ranko watched as Nabiki left. She then went to the
window to let in the morning air. Upon opening the
window she heard the sounds of a battle in the yard below.
"What the hell!" Ranko said as she saw what looked
like her father and brother beating the crap out of each
other.
Meanwhile, down in the yard, Ranma and Genma
were sparing as they do every morning. They leaped across
the pond at each other, throwing punches and kicks with
each pass.
"Didn't we so through this yesterday, old man."
Ranma said, landing on the far side of the pond.
"And we'll do it every day! I can't have you wasting
your time off of school, now can I?" Genma yelled, landing
on the side of the pond closest to the house.
"Child abuser!" Ranko yelled, planting a kick into
Genma's back and knocking him into the pond.
"Way to go, Sis!" Ranma yelled, hopping across the
pond and landing next to her.
"What the fuck was that all about?" Ranko asked.
"Just his idea of training." Ranma answered.
Panda then emerged from the pond. Enraged, he
lunged toward his children, grabbing them and tossing them
toward the water. Ranma landed with a splash. Ranko,
however, stopped in midair and stood floating a foot above
the surface of the water.
"Nya, Nya! Can't get me!" Ranko yelled.
[Don't get cocky!] Panda signed.
"If I land in the pond, I'll get real cocky!" Ranko
said with a grin.
"Mind giving me a hand?" Ranma-chan said and
grabbed Ranko's ankle.
"No!" Ranko yelled. The moment Ranma made
contact, she dropped like a rock into the pond.
"Sorry." Ranma said to a soaked Ranko-kun.
"It's okay. I just need to take a bath now." he said.
"Care to join me?"
"I can't take a bath with a girl!" Ranma yelled.
"Get your mind out of the gutter. I'm your sister."
Ranko said and looked down at his body. "Or brother, as
the case may be."
"Well, I still pass." Ranma said.
"Your loss." Ranko said and walked into the house.
After waking up, Akane left her room and found
Ranko standing outside the bathroom.
"Ranma?" Akane said.
"Nope." Ranko said. "Green eyes, remember?"
"Sorry, Ranko." Akane said. "I'm just not used to
seeing you as a guy."
"That's okay. Besides, Ranma wouldn't be a guy if
he was wet like I am." he replied.
"What happened, anyway?" Akane asked.
"Dad and Ranma were fighting and I sorta jumped
into the fray." Ranko replied.
Akane giggled. "Well, I've learned to let them go at
it and they'll finish eventually."
"Yeah. Well, now I'm stuck waiting for Nabiki to
get done with her bath."
"I thought she took a bath before she went to bed
last night." Akane said. "Why does she need one now?"
"Let's just say she had a busy night." Ranko said
while trying to keep a straight face.
"Huh?" Akane looked puzzled.
"Never mind." Ranko said. "How long does she
usually take?"
"She usually doesn't come out unless you make it
worth her while." Akane replied.
"You just lost me."
"I'll show you." Akane ran to her room and returned
with a wad of cash. "Watch." she said and slid a hundred
yen note under the door.
"You'll have to do better than that." Nabiki said
from the other side of the door.
Akane grumbled and slid a five hundred yen note
under the door. Five seconds later Nabiki appeared with a
towel wrapped around her body.
"All yours." she said and ran off to her room.
Ranko smiled, then saw Akane's irritated look.
"Relax." he said. "I'll buy you lunch later."
"It's a deal. Enjoy your bath." she said and headed
downstairs.
Ranko entered the changing room and stripped off
his T-shirt and boxers. He saw his reflection in the mirror
and flexed his muscles. "Yep, I'm a stud." he said, then
looked down at his crotch to see that he was getting
aroused. "As much fun as you were last night, now is not
the time."
In the bathroom, Ranko filled a bucket of warm
water and poured it over his head. He sighed as he felt the
change in her body. The sensations were quite pleasurable,
provided that she expected it instead of being surprised.
After lathering up and rinsing off, she lowered her body into
the furo. She leaned back and closed her eyes, letting the
hot water relax her muscles.
*Creak*
Ranko heard the bathroom door open and someone
enter.
"Change your mind?" she asked without opening
her eyes.
"About what?" Kasumi asked.
Ranko's eyes snapped open and she jerked her head
around to see Kasumi standing naked before her.
"Kasumi! What are you doing?!" Ranko yelled.
"Taking a bath." Kasumi stated simply.
"Err...you want I should leave?" Ranko asked.
"No. We need to talk and this way we can get some
privacy." Kasumi said as she washed up and rinsed off.
"Okay." Ranko said, moving over so Kasumi could
get in the furo. "This is about me and Nabiki, right?"
"No. This is about you and my family, but we can
start with Nabiki." Kasumi replied.
"You're going to chew me out now, aren't you?"
Ranko said with and ashamed look on her face.
"No. As Nabiki reminded me earlier, love between
two women, while not socially acceptable, is not something
you can prevent." Kasumi said. "You do love her, right?"
"With all my heart." Ranko answered with
determination.
"Can you keep this love a secret?" Kasumi asked.
"I've been through this with Nabiki." Ranko said. "I
don't like to hide my feelings if I don't have to."
"In this case you have to." Kasumi said. "My
father can tend to over react in regards to the welfare of his
daughters, and I think your father would be the same."
"So don't tell our Dad's, right?" Ranko asked.
"Right." Kasumi answered.
"But I can tell other people, right?" Ranko asked.
"Provided you can trust them." Kasumi answered.
Ranko gave a relieved sigh. "Good. I'd hate to have
to keep this a secret from Ranma."
"That's the other thing I wanted to talk to you
about."
"You don't want to tell my own brother?!?" Ranko
was shocked.
"Actually, I was going to insist that you do tell him."
"Huh?"
�Ranma has had his curse for a while, but still has
trouble adjusting." Kasumi replied. "You seem
comfortable with your curse, so I'd like you to help him
deal with his. After all, you're the only one who really
understands what he's going through."
"Yeah, I can see how he might think of himself as less
than manly. I sure didn't feel very feminine after I fell in that
spring. But, being bisexual helped me adjust quickly."
"I'd rather you not suggest that Ranma sleep with
any men."
"Of course not." Ranko said. "I was having sex
with women before Jusenkyo, So turning into a guy is just
a new way of doing things. I just have to explain to Ranma
that he can love a woman just as well when he's female."
"Before you do that you should talk to Akane."
Kasumi said.
"Why?" Ranko asked.
"Well, she seems to think that Ranma is a pervert
because he can change gender." Kasumi replied. "I'd like
you to explain to her that the curse doesn't do that."
"Believe me, I know how some people can think
that. Especially with my behavior sometimes. But that has
nothing to do the curse so Akane won't have to worry."
"That's good." Kasumi said with a smile.
"Kasumi?"
"Yes, Ranko?"
"If it's not too personal, can you tell me who this
Mayaka person that Nabiki mentioned is?"
Kasumi lost her smile. "Yes, it is too personal.
Maybe someday, but not now."
"Sorry."
"That's okay." Kasumi said, her smile returning.
"Well, it's about time I started breakfast." she said.
Suddenly the water started churning and a whirlpool formed
in the center of the furo.
"Oh, no." Ranko said.
"Ranko, what's happening?" Kasumi asked with a
frightened tone.
"You don't wanna know." Ranko replied.
The whirlpool continued for a few moments, and then
the water started to glow as a young girl hopped out of the
vortex and floated above the tub.
"Hi, there!" Skuld yelled.
"Damn it, Skuld!" Ranko yelled. "You sure have a
shitty sense of timing!"
"Hmm." Skuld turned around to see Kasumi doing
her best impersonation of a deer frozen in headlights. "Did I
interrupt an intimate moment? Geez, you don't waste time,
do you? It's only been a day."
"No, you didn't interrupt anything. But having
someone just appear out of your bath can be pretty
unnerving." Ranko said. "Now would you please stop
floating there and give her time to recover."
"Friend of yours?" Kasumi asked, having regained
her senses somewhat."
"Yep. Kasumi Tendo, meet the goddess Skuld."
"Pleased to meet you." Skuld said, having finally set
her feet on the floor by the furo."
"Likewise." Kasumi replied. "Oh! I've got to start
breakfast. Will you be joining us, Skuld?"
"Can I?" Skuld asked.
"Of course." Kasumi replied as she got out of the
furo and wrapped a towel around her body. "Ranko, it's
best that you finish your bath soon."
"You got it." Ranko said and grabbed a towel.
After Kasumi left Skuld turned to Ranko. "You
sure you weren't doing anything before I got here?"
"Just having a peaceful conversation." Ranko said
and then whispered in her ear. "To be honest, I'm more
interested in her sister."
"What is it with you and girls?"
"Relax, kid. It's just one of those things."
"Don't call me a kid! We're the same age, you
know."
"Physically, maybe. But when it comes to
immaturity, you've got me outclassed."
"And don't you forget it." Skuld replied, and then
realized what she just said. "Hey, wait a min..."
"C'mon. I'll show you my room." Ranko said and
went to open the bathroom door.
"Sweeto!" Happosai yelled as he leaped forward and
glomped onto Ranko's breasts, pulling her towel off in the
process.
"Aaaahhh! A virus!" Skuld screamed.
"ooohh...yeah..." Ranko moaned as Happosai
continued to fondle her.
"Ranko! Don't move!" Skuld yelled and pulled
Mjonor, her trusty mallet, off her back.
"huh?...no...don't..." Ranko said weakly.
*Bash*
Skuld slammed her hammer into Happosai's skull,
knocking him to the ground.
"Hey! I was enjoying that!" Ranko yelled.
"Hmm?" Skuld said as she examined the heap at
Ranko's feet. "I thought they were supposed to disappear
when I hit them."
Suddenly Happosai's eyes snapped open. "Pretty
lady!" he yelled and glomped onto Skuld.
"Aaaah! Help!" Skuld screamed.
"Hey, buddy! You mind finishing with me first!"
Ranko yelled and tried to peel the old man off the goddess.
"Ranma, my boy! Glad to see you're finally come to
appreciate the finer things in life!" Happosai yelled and leaped
toward Ranko, colliding with Ranma-chan's fist.
"Leave my sister alone, freak!" Ranma yelled.
"Honestly. A girl can't get a cheap thrill around this
place." Ranko sounded annoyed as she covered herself with
her towel.
"I got him!" Skuld yelled.
*Bash* *Bash* *Bash*
"Skuld." Ranko said.
*Bash* *Bash* *Bash*
"Skuld!" Ranko yelled.
*Bash* *Bash* *Bash*
"SKULD!!!" Ranko screamed.
"What!" Skuld yelled.
"I think you got him."
"But...he's supposed to disappear."
"Get it through your thick skull that he's not a virus.
He's a human!" Ranko looked down at the broken and
bloody mass. "Or at least, he used to be."
"Don't worry, it takes more than that to kill him."
Ranma said. "Believe me, I've tried."
"Ranko?" Skuld asked. "Why are their two of you?"
"There aren't." Ranko said. "This is Ranma."
"But, Ranma's your brother." Skuld said.
"He is." Ranko replied. "Apparently gender bending
runs in the family."
[Does not!] Panda signed as he, Soun, Akane, and
Nabiki appeared in the hall.
"What's all the noise?" Soun asked.
"Apparently, Happosai attacked Ranko and her friend
beat him to a pulp." Ranma answered.
[Really?] Panda signed.
Soun grabbed Skuld's hand and shook it heartily.
"Thank you, young lady. You are a godsend."
"No, I'm a goddess." Skuld said.
"You're a what?" Akane asked.
"Let me guess. You're one of Urd's sisters, right?"
Nabiki asked.
"Unfortunately." Skuld replied.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Nabiki asked.
"Never mind her." Ranko said. "She and Urd don't
exactly get along."
"Only because she's arrogant and selfish and violent
and pushy and impulsive and..."
"Hey!" Ranko yelled. "That's my mentor you're
talking about!"
"Well, it's true." Skuld said.
"So their really is an Urd?" Akane asked.
"Of course." Ranko answered. "Only a complete
psycho would make up a story like that."
"Yeah." Skuld said. "Ranko's only partially
psychotic."
"Hey!" Ranko yelled.
"That's what you get for calling me thick skulled."
Skuld said with a grin.
"Aren't you forgetting someone?" Happosai asked
from the floor.
"Aaaahhh!" Skuld screamed. "It's alive!" She
swung her hammer down at him.
"Sorry, cutie. I don't fall for the same trick twice."
Happosai said as he stopped Mjonor with one finger.
"Now, Soun, Genma. You have some explaining to do."
[Her fault.] Panda signed and pointed at Skuld.
"Yes. She did it." Soun said. �We would never
dream of beating the crap out of you, Master."
"Not that, stupid!" Happosai said and smacked
them both in the head. "I mean them." He pointed at Ranma
and Ranko.
[That's my daughter.] Panda signed.
"You don't have a daughter." Happosai said.
"He does now." Ranko said. "Ranko Saotome, at
your service."
"That's the right idea." Happosai said and leaped
toward her.
"Oh no you don't." she said and raised her hand,
summoning an invisible wall and stopping Happy in mid
glomp. "Sorry, the mood's been ruined."
"Breakfast!" Kasumi called from downstairs.
"Oh, crap!" Ranma said as she and Panda forced
their way into the bathroom to change to their uncursed
forms.
"Oh, I've got to get dressed." Ranko said and ran to
her room.
"Um...which way to the dining room?" Skuld asked.
A little while later at the dining room table, everyone
gazed in wonder at the feast that Kasumi had prepared.
"Wow!" Skuld said.
"What a spread!" Ranma exclaimed.
"Are all your breakfast's this big, Kasumi?" Ranko
asked.
"No. I just felt guilty because this is the only meal
I'm cooking today." she answered.
"No lunch or dinner?" Ranma asked.
"Oh, did I forget to tell you? Cologne called and
said she wanted you and Ranko to stop by her restaurant
later today. I figured that you could take Nabiki and Akane
with you and have lunch while you're there." Kasumi
replied.
"But, what about dinner?" Ranma asked.
"I've got dinner covered." Akane said.
"Too bad I've got concert tickets with my friends
tonight." Nabiki said with a grin.
"You knew about this, and you didn't warn me!"
Ranma yelled.
"I would have if I thought I'd get anything out of it."
Nabiki replied. "Now, if you want at least one good meal
today, you'd better dig in."
Ranma turned to see Soun, Genma, Skuld, and
Ranko devouring the food. Happosai disappeared at the
first mention of Akane's cooking.
"Amazing." Skuld said. "This is almost as good as
Belldandy's cooking."
"Who?" Akane asked.
"My big sister." Skuld answered.
"Does she think she's a goddess, too?" Akane
asked.
"What do you mean 'think'!" Skuld yelled and
reached for one of her grenades.
"Relax, Skuld." Ranko said. "She's just a little
skeptical."
"Humans can be such a pain sometimes." Skuld
said, sounding annoyed.
"Hey! I'm human!" Ranko yelled.
"Only until you get your qualification." Skuld
replied.
"Do I even want to know?" Akane asked.
"Probably not." Ranko replied. She turned around
to see Genma stealing food from her plate. "Hey! Don't
make me freeze you again."
"Ranko!" Skuld yelled. "You know what happens
when you use too much magic"
"What happens?" Nabiki asked.
"Er...let's just say that my batteries run down, and
the rest ain't pretty."
"I shouldn't have asked, should I?" Nabiki asked.
"Nope." Ranko replied.
"You wouldn't have this problem if you had
something simple for a power source, Ranko." Skuld said.
"Not all of us can stop by Haagen Dazs to get a
recharge." she replied.
"Would you two stop it." Akane said. "You're
giving me a headache."
"Okay, back to normal conversation." Ranko said.
" So, you really think Kasumi's cooking is as good as
Belldandy's"
"You bet." Skuld said.
"I'm flattered." Kasumi said.
"I have to invite you over to our house so you and
she can trade recipes." Skuld said.
"Okay." Kasumi replied.
The rest of breakfast went by without incident.
After the meal, Nabiki and Skuld went with Ranko up to her
room.
"Hey, Skuld." Ranko said. "I thought you were
gonna bring my stuff with you."
"I did." Skuld said and pulled out a metal ball with
loops of cable sticking out of it.
"Nabiki! Get down!" Ranko yelled and they both
jumped behind the bed.
"Ranko. You can come out now." Skuld said.
"This isn't a bomb."
"Then what is it?" Ranko asked as she peeked out
from behind the bed.
"It's my latest invention, Mister Matter
Compressor."
"Huh?" Nabiki said.
"Watch." Skuld said and tossed the ball on the bed.
There was a flash of light and suddenly they found
themselves surrounded by boxes.
"Impressive." Nabiki said.
"You know, Skuld. You could have made more
than one trip." Ranko said.
"And let my talents go to waste?" she replied with a
grin.
"What's in all these boxes, anyway? Nabiki asked.
"What's written on them?" Ranko asked.
"Well, these two say 'His' and 'Hers'." Nabiki said,
pointing to two small boxes.
"Let's see." Ranko said and opened the boxes.
"That's my male and female wardrobe."
"Here, let me help." Nabiki said and they took the
clothes and hung them in the closet. "You know, for a
teenage girl, you don't have much in the way of clothes."
Ranko looked in the closet and saw that it was half
empty. "Maybe you're right. You'll have to take me
shopping sometime."
"And where will you get the money for all the things
you'll need?" Nabiki asked.
"I'm not a freeloading house guest. Here." Ranko
said and pulled a savings account passbook out of a box and
handed it to Nabiki.
Nabiki's eyes grew wide as she looked at the
amount in the passbook. "My god. There's over twenty
million yen in here. Did I mention how much I love you?"
"You mean she's the one you're interested in?" Skuld
asked Ranko.
"Yep." Ranko answered, and then remembered
what Kasumi told her. "Don't tell our dads, okay?"
"Okay." Skuld replied.
"What's in this box? Nabiki said, pointing to a box
marked 'Potions'.