Well, after lurking for a while I have decided to take the plunge and
actually send something to the list. Please be gentle.

Some acutely observant members of the list might notice that this is a
Christmas fic. It really was started in November, honest, I swear! It just
took me
this long to finish it.

Please, send me any comments, criticisms or whatever, I look forward to
geting
them. Especially about Rei's dialog. I don't think I quite got her voice
right.
I think the ending's a little to abrubt also, but I wanted to get this out,
so...

Neon Genesis Evangelion is by Gainax
I have no right to do this, whatsoever.

Misato's Christmas Party
------------------------

     Shinji and Asuka stood in the door, staring at the fir tree in the
living
room. From the hall closet came the sounds of boxes being moved. Misato
emerged in her usual after-work attire, cutoffs and a tank top, carrying
several boxes stacked precariously in her arms.
     "I knew I kept these decorations when I moved! Shinji - you better
hurry and get this place cleaned up. Our guests will be here in a couple of
hours." Misato picked up a beer from the table and took a long swallow.
     Shinji's face dropped. "Guests? When did you decide to have a
party?".
     Misato finished off her beer and wiped the foam from her mouth, and
smirked. "Why yesterday of course, when my three pilots told me how much
they needed one!" She lowered her voice and stared at Asuka and Shinji.
"You didn't *seriously* think I was going to let the three of you get away
with that 'I don't want to celebrate Christmas' crap did you? Besides, you
can't trim the tree without a party. Say - where's Rei? Why isn't she here
to
help?"
     Asuka - who had been silently staring at the tree - turned and gave
Misato a disgusted look. "*How* much have you been drinking? She doesn't
live here, you know! And we just found out about your stupid party!"
     Misato hiccuped and lifted her nose at Asuka. "I haven't had any
more to drink than usual." She had a hurt look on her face. Shinji and Asuka
both rolled their eyes.
     "Hey - why are you two doing that!" Misato put her beer back on the
table and placed her hands on her hips. "Stop goofing off and get to work!
Shinji, clean this place up! And Asuka - go call Rei!"
     "She said she had something to do tonight."
     "Then go find her!"
     "But why should *I* have to go get her! I'm not the one who's
always mooning after her and peeping at her in her swimsuit! That's what
Shinji's for!"
     "Uh-hey! I don't do that! I do not peep at my fellow pilots in their
swimsuits!"
     Asuka narrowed her eyes. "Oh! So you peep at us without our
swimsuits?"
     "Yes - I mean, no! No!"
     Misato got another beer out of the refrigerator. After living with the
two of them for a while, she was used to their bickering. "Now, now Asuka."
She flourished her hand in the girl's direction. "If you don't hurry and get
Rei,
you won't have time to get ready before Kaji gets here."
     "Kaji? Kaji! He's coming?" Asuka asked excitedly.
     "Well of course! And so is Ritsuko, Hikari, Touji, Kensuke . . . "
Asuka was out the door before Misato could finish. Shinji had been picking
up Misato's empty beer cans from the table. His face got gloomier as her
list
of guests continued to grow.
     "Do you think you have enough alcohol in the apartment for that
many guests?" he asked sarcastically.
     "Don't be silly, Shinji. Of course not! I'm having more delivered." She
looked  guilty for a moment as she handed Shinji a slip of paper and said,
"Oh yeah, by the way, this is your portion of the expenses. Don't worry
about
paying me now, you can give it to me next payday!"
     Shinji groaned. He was glad that Asuka had already left the
apartment.

-*-

     Shinji  knew the party would be bad when Misato came out of her
room dressed as a reindeer. Shinji thought that Misato's everyday outfits
were very daring, and she wore even less at home, but the reindeer outfit .
. .
the horns . . . the tail . . . were, well . . .  disturbing. He usually
tried not to
think about that sort of thing too much, especially about Misato, Asuka or
Rei. There was too much potential for embarrassment, and he had been
ridiculed enough as it was.
     Shinji figured that Misato must be pretty loaded, even by her
standards, to wear that outfit. Her face was red enough to confirm his
fears.
     "Shinji! What do you think?"
     Misato stood in the middle of the room posing.
     "Well?"
     Shinji looked at her, and then quickly looked at the floor. A slow
blush began to spread across his cheeks. "Do you have to embarrass me like
this?" He asked quietly.
     Misato leveled a frank stare at Shinji and said: "Why? Don't you like
my outfit? Don't I look good in it?"
     "Well, yes . . .  but . . . "
     Misato held Shinji's gaze as she slowly sauntered over to where he
was standing. She slowly leaned forward until her eyes were looking directly
into his, their faces only inches apart.
     "Shinji, Don't you like to look at me in it?" Misato's voice was low
and voluptuous.
     Shinji's face reddened even more, it was all he could do to stare at
the
floor. "Why do you always do this to me?"
     Misato laughed and gave Shinji her brightest smile and ruffled his
hair. "Because its fun!" With a toss of her hips she disappeared into the
kitchen. "What! No more beer?! I guess I'll just have to drink something
else
until the liquor people arrive. Have you ever had egg nog Shinji? I've got a
great recipe for it here, you'll love it! Especially with my *secret*
ingredient.
I bet you can't guess what it is!"
     Shinji groaned.

-*-

     Once the party began, Shinji found himself paired up with Rei. He
thought it was rather odd to begin with. After all, he was a quiet person,
and
Rei was a positive recluse. But the more he thought about it, the more he
realized that there was really no one else at the party for either one of
them
to pal around with. Of course, Shinji's friends were present, but they were
busy mooning around after Misato. Shinji didn't want to watch her flirt any
more tonight. No one, it seemed, was safe.
     They had started out by trimming the tree. Some guests had brought
ornaments as gifts, and several of the boxes Misato had pulled from the
closet had ornaments in them. But, by the time all of these were hung, the
tree still had several yawning bare spots. Then Misato had the bright idea
of
wrapping wire around the necks of her empty liquor bottles and hanging
them from the tree.
     Ritsuko had pointed out that the heavy bottles would probably break
the branches. But Misato had countered by retrieving a box of empty
miniatures from her room.
     "Don't you ever throw away your empties, Misato?" Kaji asked.
     She stuck her tongue out at him. "That's what Shinji's for!"
     Surprisingly, the empty miniatures actually looked quite good on the
tree. Misato insisted that the Americans did it all the time, but no one
believed her.
     Eventually most of the guests left, leaving only Ritsuko, Kaji, Rei and
Shinji and Asuka's friends.
     Asuka was stalking Kaji, who was trying his best to avoid her.
Ritsuko seemed to be amused by the whole thing, and kept trying to tease
Misato about losing Kaji to Asuka. So the merry band simply floated in
circles around the room - Touji and Kensuke chasing Misato, who flirted
with the boys and bantered with Ritsuko, who was protecting Kaji from
Asuka. Shinji and Rei sat against the wall, watching the whole sordid affair
unwind before their eyes.
     Shinji watched Rei as she followed the increasingly drunken
movements of Misato with calm disinterest. When Asuka had returned with
Rei, she had not expressed any opinion about the party. Rei had done as she
was asked, and had helped set out the refreshments, but then she had taken a
cup of punch and sat where she was now. No amount of inducement had led
her toward conversation, and eventually the others had given up trying to
talk to her. Asuka had been more derogatory than usual about Rei's attitude.
But, as usual, Rei had simply ignored her. Now Shinji watched her closely,
wondering about her silence.
     "Umm, are you enjoying the party Rei?"
     "No."
     "Really? Why not?"
     "I . . . dislike holidays."
     "Huh! You do?"
     "Yes."
     "Didn't your family celebrate any holidays?"
     ". . ."
     Shinji didn't think it was possible, but Rei seemed to draw even more
into herself, exuding a cold aura which discouraged conversation. Shinji
mentally kicked himself. Family was a sore point for the Eva pilots. He
pressed on though, determined to talk to her.
     "My father never celebrated holidays with me. Never. Even my
earliest memories of Christmas, with my mother, have no images of my
father. It almost seemed like he didn't exist for me until my mother died.
Not
that he did anything after her death either." Shinji's voice was filled with
bitterness and self-pity.
     Rei turned her head to look at Shinji. Her eyes softened a little, but
otherwise her face showed no change in expression. He continued speaking.
     "The first Christmas I really celebrated was after I left home. That
was a few years ago. The school I was at arranged for me to spend
Christmas and New Years with the family of another student there. I was
uncomfortable, watching people who love each other express their happiness,
when I was alone. That's why I didn't want to celebrate Christmas this
year -
I didn't want to have and try to reach out to others, knowing that I'm not
really a part of their family, that I'm an outsider."
     Rei considered Shinji, without changing her expression. "What about
Major Katsuragi and Asuka?"
     Shinji noticed that she did not include herself. It was just like her
to
exclude herself from the group.
     "Well, I live with them. Misato has been very kind to me. And I even
get along with Asuka some now, but they're not family. I'm not sure I've
ever
had a real family." Shinji placed his hands in his lap and stared at the
floor
glumly.
     Rei looked out at the party again. Misato was teasing Touji
mercilessly, and Hikari's face was getting red as she tried to drag him
away.
Asuka had her hand over her eyes and shook her head as she stood by Hikari.
When Rei spoke, her voice was soft, barely above a whisper.
      "My first memory is of Commander Ikari, watching me. Don't talk
about family. It makes me uncomfortable." Rei continued to watch the rest of
the party goers while she spoke.
     Shinji stared at Rei. He didn't think that his father had real feelings
for
Rei. It might appear that he did, but Shinji's own bitter experience told
him
that his father only used people. Rei continued to watch the party, but
despite her outburst, she betrayed no emotion.
     "I don't know what to say, Rei."
     "Then don't say anything."

-*-

     Asuka was tired of chasing Kaji, and tired of watching Hikari get
jealous of the attention Misato was giving Touji. She was more or less
resigned to the fact that Kaji wasn't really interested in her as a woman. I
mean, why would he be when he had a woman like Misato to chase after.
Not that Misato was all that hot. Men were just idiots. Tokyo 3 wasn't what
she had expected.
     Bored, she wandered away from the main group. Then she saw Shinji
and Rei sitting together under the mistletoe.
     Now, Asuka knew that they weren't sitting there on purpose. The
two of them were so dense that they probably didn't even know that the
mistletoe was there. Heck! The two of them probably didn't even know what
mistletoe meant! Asuka thought about the situation for a minute, and
struggled with her conscience. She wanted to make a scene.  Shouldn't she
feel some guilt about it? Probably, but she didn't! Oh well, she couldn't
live
with herself if she let this opportunity slip by.
     "Say," she said brightly, "when did this start?"
     Rei looked at her for a second, and then asked in a soft voice,  "When
did what start?"
     "When did the two of you become an item, eh?"
     Shinji looked away from Rei quickly. "What?" His voice cracked as
he spoke.
     "When did the two of you get so cozy? I mean, you've spent the
whole night together, ignoring everyone so that you could sit alone in a
quiet
corner under the mistletoe."
     Shinji's face began to redden. "M-m-mistletoe?" He slowly looked up.
     Everyone else had started to gather around the three of them when
they heard Asuka's first exclamation. Now they began to encourage Shinji
and Rei to kiss. Misato was at the front of the pack. "Yea Shinji! Kiss 'er!
Go
on! Be a man about it!" She slammed down the rest of her beer. "Kaji,
gimme anudder beer!"
     Rei stared at Misato, who was listing dangerously, then shifted her
gaze to Asuka. Asuka began to sweat under Rei's cool gaze. Deciding that
she preferred to be in control, Asuka took the offensive again.
     "Well, what's the matter? Don't you believe in the holiday spirit?"
Asuka arched her eyebrow and looked down her nose at Shinji and Rei, her
hands on her hips.
     Rei's eyes bored into Asuka's. Then she turned toward Shinji and
placed a hand on his cheek. His eyes began to dart from Rei to Asuka to
Misato and back. Then Rei leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips.
     Asuka snickered.
     Rei parted her lips slightly and pulled Shinji's body closer to hers.
Shinji, who had been very still from the time Rei had placed her hand on his
cheek until now, began to squirm and make muffled noises. Rei let her
tongue slip into Shinji's mouth, where it soon encountered his. Shinji
stopped
squirming and stiffened. His eyes rolled up into his head as his mind shut
down.
     Asuka stared at the two of them with her eyes wide open and her jaw
on the floor. "Arrrrrrgh! She's giving him tongue!" She yelled in disbelief.
     "Awww-right Rei! Yeah! Finally, some action!" Misato screamed,
then passed out. Kaji laughed and caught her as collapsed, then he and
Ritsuko began to carry Misato to her room.
     Rei broke the kiss and pulled back from Shinji.
     "Good night, Shinji."
     Rei's voice was soft, for his ears alone. Shinji could hear the emotion
in her words, though her face betrayed none. Then she stood and left,
ignoring the others.
     Asuka stood staring at Shinji, a look of pure amazement on her face.
"The First Child is weird Shinji, very weird. Who would ever want to kiss
you? I mean, you weren't very good when I did . . . " The gasps from behind
made her stop, and she realized what she had just said, and whom she had
said it in front of. She stared in horror at Hikari, who was trying to
stifle a
laugh.
     "Ach, Mein Gott!" Asuka screamed, then ran to her room and
slammed the door shut.
     Touji and Kensuke stood around Shinji and slapped his shoulders.
"Shinji! You've kissed them both, you dog! I never thought you had it in
you!" Touji exclaimed.
     Kensuke couldn't hold in his excitement. "Yeah! Why didn't you tell
us? That's quite a coup! I wish I'd brought my camera."
     Shinji ignored them both, and stared at the door Rei had left through.

-*-

     Shinji sat alone in front of the Christmas tree. After Rei left, with
Misato passed out in her room and Asuka barricaded in hers, the others had
left. As usual, it had been up to him to see them out and thank them for
coming, then clean up the mess everyone else had made. Still, staring at the
tree shining softly in the corner made him think of the good things that
were
in his life, even if there were few enough of them.
     Despite the horror of the Angels, Shinji realized that these past
months had been the best in his life. He could finally see the worth in
himself,
that he was valued by others. Although awkward at first, he really enjoyed
living with Misato and Asuka. They did pick on him a lot. Misato was always
making him cook and clean, and Asuka insulted him as much at the
apartment as anywhere else. Yet Shinji thought that this must be what a real
family was like. He had told Rei that he didn't consider the two to be his
family, but now, as he thought back to the party, he realized that Misato,
Asuka, and even Rei, might be the only family he would ever have.
     The thought made him sigh.
     The door buzzed as someone rang the bell. Shinji glanced at the
clock, and wondered who it might be. He stood up and went to answer the
door.

-*-

     Rei walked slowly back to the door of Shinji's apartment. In the
shadows she had waited until the others left, watching them disappear into
the night. Then she had returned to the apartment. She leaned her head
against the door and breathed slowly. Why had she kissed him? It would only
confuse him. She would have never kissed Shinji if Asuka hadn't been
goading her, and yet . . .  Shinji intruded more frequently into her
thoughts
recently. Of all of her teammates, the only one Rei found of any interest
was
Shinji. Asuka she could ignore, Major Katsuragi was just another person to
be obeyed. Dr. Akagi kept her distance. Commander Ikari . . .  well. But
Shinji seemed to touch part of her that no one else did. She reacted to him
in
ways that she couldn't for anyone else. He embarrassed her, he made her
smile, he made her sad, he made her angry. The kiss she shared with Shinji
tonight had made Rei realize how empty her life was. Rei had felt alive when
she kissed Shinji, had felt she was living her own life, and not someone
else's.
     She wanted more.
     Rei rang the buzzer on the apartment door and waited.

-*-

     When he opened the door, Shinji was surprised to see Rei standing at
the rail, looking at him. Rei's eyes seemed to be glowing in the dim
half-light
coming from inside the apartment. Her eyes locked with his, and Shinji could
not look away. He watched as she spoke.
     "I want to talk to you."
     "Ahhh . . . "
     Shinji swallowed. He could feel his hands trembling. Rei's stare held
his eyes.
     "Oh, ummm . . . " Shinji could feel chills running up his spine from
Rei's gaze. "Of c-course. C-come in . . . "
     Rei held Shinji's eyes for several long seconds. Then she walked past
Shinji into the apartment.

-*-

     Rei sat on the couch in front of the tree, and watched the blinking
lights. She could hear Shinji in the kitchen. Soon he reappeared, carrying
two
cups of steaming tea. He handed one to Rei, then sat on the couch at the
opposite end from her.
     Rei sipped her tea. "It's good."
     "Thanks. I've gotten a lot of practice in the kitchen recently. Misato
and Asuka don't cook much." Shinji looked at Rei, who was still staring at
the tree. He placed his cup back on the saucer and held it in his lap. He
watched the steam rise from the tea.
     Rei looked out the window. In the crisp winter sky she could just
make out the sparkle of stars over the glow from the city.
     "Ummm, what did you want to talk to about?" Shinji asked.
     Rei still stared intently out the window. "Do you like me?"
     Shinji watched Rei quietly. Her voice was calm and impenetrable, as
always. He was getting worried about what Rei wanted to know. It seemed
like the conversation was sure to result in his embarrassment. "Yes, I like
you, Rei. You're a friend."
     "A friend?" There was still no change in Rei's voice.
     "Y-yes."
     Rei turned and looked into his eyes. "I want . . .  need . . .  more
than
friendship from you."
     Now Shinji was embarrassed. "What do you mean 'm-more than
friendship'?"
     Rei dropped her gaze from Shinji to the floor. Shinji thought that he
had never seen Rei look so . . .  nervous?
     Rei spoke, in her usual voice, but not meeting Shinji's eyes. "I try to
hold myself away from the people I meet. I have to, to do what is required
of
me. Until you came I never felt that I should be any different. I was Rei,
and
that was enough. Since you have arrived, you have made me . . .  reconsider.
I cannot remain outside of life any more."
     Shinji stared at Rei. He was worried about this conversation. He
didn't think his father would approve of him causing Rei discomfort.  "I'm
sorry, I don't mean to . . . "
     "Don't be sorry." Rei raised her eyes to meet Shinji's. "I'm not."
     Shinji stood up and faced Rei. "What can I do Rei? If you want me
to, I could stay away from you, not speak with you."
     Rei stood and walked forward until she stood in front of Shinji, then
wrapped her arms around his neck. She rested her head on his shoulder. She
could feel Shinji tremble. She smiled her small smile. Rei enjoyed knowing
that she had this effect on him, as he had on her.
     Shinji could not stop trembling. He could feel Rei's body pressed
against his. He slowly lifted his arms and placed them around Rei's waist.
She
squeezed him tightly. Rei whispered softly in Shinji's ear.
     "It's too late to stop now Shinji. Too late to ignore me. I need you
Shinji. I need you to be part of my life, need you to complete the parts of
me
that I cannot."
     Rei lifted her head and gazed deeply into his eyes. Shinji was really
worried now. "Ummm . . .  Rei . . . "
     Then she pulled Shinji's head down and kissed him deeply.
     Shinji was stiff at first, but gradually relaxed and began to return
Rei's
kiss. After a few minutes, Rei broke off the kiss and took Shinji's hand. He
still trembled, but followed her willingly.

-*-

     Asuka silently slid her door shut and fumed. First Kaji chased after
Misato. Then 'Wonder Girl' actually kissed that idiot Shinji, and now this.
     "Asuka, " she thought, "your life is crap."

-*-

     When Misato dragged herself out of bed the next morning, she had a
terrible hangover. "Why did I let myself go off and drink like that last
night?"
     Misato pulled a housecoat on, and stumbled into the hall. "A hot bath
and an ice cold beer are what I need," she thought to herself.
     She walked to the kitchen and pulled the refrigerator door open. She
could see that Shinji had already wrapped the party leftovers and put them
away. "Damn, I hate neat freaks," Misato thought to herself. She took a beer
and shuffled toward the bath, still only half-awake.
     She saw Shinji coming out of the bath drying his hair. When he saw
Misato, he quickly slid the door shut behind him.
      "G-g-good morning," he stuttered.
     Not in the mood to talk, Misato grunted and waited for him to move
out of her way. When he still stood frozen in place, she placed her free
hand
on his shoulder and started pushing until she could get to the door.
     "Let that be a lesson to you Shinji," Misato said. "Never come
between me and my bath when I have a hangover." She turned and entered
the bath, shutting the door behind her, ignoring Shinji's wide eyes and
trembling body.
     "Good morning Major."
     Misato screamed and spun around when she heard the disembodied
voice floating out of the steam. She saw a shape emerging from the mist. The
figure paused and looked at her intently as she pressed her back to the tile
wall.
     "Are you feeling well?" the blurry figure asked in an emotionless
voice. Misato just nodded quickly. The figure watched for another few
seconds before exiting the bath.
     Misato slumped down against the wall and sipped her beer. She must
have had a *lot* more to drink last night than she thought. She could've
sworn that was Rei!
     Half a beer later, as she relaxed in the steaming water of the bath,
Misato decided that she had just imagined the entire affair.
     Rei wouldn't have stayed over last night.
     Would she?

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Steve Pardue
spardue@zebra.net