Any and all criticisms gratefully accepted.

The criticisms I sent on the last draft seem to have been gratefully
ignored. ^_^ But I'll try again:

* Akane's sudden blow-up at Ranma just screams "Plot Device" to me. I'd
like to understand a bit more of what she's feeling in this story, what
caused her to explode like that.

* The story does such a great job of setting up a totally plausible
one night stand between Ranma and Ukyo; then it cops out. It would have
been a much more powerful story if it HAD happened. Would Ranma and Ukyo
both believe each other when they said that it was unintentional? How
would Ranma and Akane, and their families, deal with it when the truth
came out? How would baby Nouma being in the picture change or complicate
things?

I also have to say that upon re-reading, I found the end Ranma/Akane
making up scene to be far too saccharine for my taste. Maybe that's just
me, though.


Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics