A large figure wearing armor sits at a extremely messy desk.

Lord Archive: Hmm, I guess this should be good for my first MSTing, but
I'll need a little help.

Archive waves his hand and two figures appear five feet in the air, and
land with a loud thud.

Akane: Ranma, Get off me.

Ranma: (stands up) Hey, I thought we were working on Nekoken today.

Akane: (stands up) Of course you want to work on that lemon, pervert.

Archive: I thought a little distraction would be good so we're going to
MST this story.

Ranma and Akane: Grrrr

On Wed, 12 Nov 1997, David A. Tatum wrote:

WOW!  Finished. 

Archive: Damn, I didn't want this to end.

Akane: All good things must come to an end.

Archive: If that's the case then why are you two still running around.
	You're series ended.

Ranma: People just can't get enough of me.

Akane: (Mallet smashes Ranma.)

Now, I can breathe again.  I feel as if I kinda rushed
through this one, even though it took a lot longer than most of the other
parts to write, so I'm asking for some heavy-duty c&c from someone before I
send it to the RAAC (of course, I have yet to recieve more than the
occasional comment here or there on any of the parts, so I'm not really
expecting any). As its nearly 2:15 a.m., I think I'll keep this brief.  If
you missed any parts, send me e-mail requesting them and I'll send you what
you missed.  Disclaimer and similar junk were included with part 1.  Enjoy!
---------------------------------
Part 7:

Akane: It might of been nice to MST the first six parts.

Archive: I wasn't feeling creative then.
 
Ranma: You are now?

The moment Nabiki got home, Ranma, Mikado, and B.B. descended upon her,
asking her if they could 'talk' about the way she was administering the
tournament.  They escorted her to the living room, and sat her down.  The
three surrounded her, and Nabiki looked around nervously.  The only sound
was that of Kasumi tending the garden, until Nabiki decided to break the
silence.

Archive: I hope they decide to practice martial arts on her.

Ranma: Wouldn't happen. I don't hit girls.

Akane: Who said it had to be you? For what she did I want to 'spar' with
	her.
 

"Uh, what's going on?" she asked.

Mikado and B.B. looked at Ranma, waiting for him to begin.  He looked down
nervously, but he gritted his teeth.  He had to get this to work, if his
plan was to succeed.  For Akane, he had to risk it...

"Nabiki, we want to remove you as head judge for this tournament.  Also,
we're changing the format.  The winner of tomorrow's tournament, no matter
who she is, wins the pig."

Akane:(glares at Ranma) Don't you dare make me lose that contest.

Ranma: Why would I? I hate losing.
 

Nabiki shrugged.  "Ah, well.  It was a bust for me anyway.  As long as I
get paid-"

"Er, that's something we need to talk about," Ranma shyly broke in. 
Nabiki's eyes widened, and remarkably her chi flared up just like Akane's
usually did before she malleted him.

Archive: Oh she's pissed.

B.B., fortunately for Ranma, intervened.  "I only agreed to let them change
the format if you returned the money spent hiring you.  You ruined the
contest, and so the others deserve a refund... I think its fair- after all,
you were corrupt, you accepted bribes (as I myself will atestify to), and
you stole Bur- er, MY clothes and did other things to ruin my chances in
yesterdays contest solely for revenge.  By the way, you owe me a days
rental for the clothes."  She smirked slowly.

"I won't do it!  And you can't get rid of me- otherwise, who will judge
tomorrows Kissing tournament?!"  Nabiki cried.  She knew she was losing,
and was only playing for time while she tried to think of something better
to say.  She failed to, however, when someone else spoke up.  EVERYONE
facefaulted.

Archive: Who spoke up?
 

*	*	*	*	*

Akane walked into the kitchen, looking for Nodoka.  She found Kasumi, and
decided she might as well ask her.

"Say, Kasumi, have you seen Ranma around here?"

Kasumi turned to Akane and smiled.  "As a matter of fact, I saw him less
than an hour ago.  He asked me if I would take over for Nabiki as judge for
your contest."

Archive: I guess Kasumi was the mysterious speaker of the last scene.
 
Akane: Isn't it the kissing contest that Kasumi's judging?

Ranma: Has she ever been kissed?

Archive: Hentai oppinions differ on that point.

'I wonder why he did that?'  Akane blinked.  "Uh, he did?  Why?"

"Oh, he said that Nabiki had been acting improperly as a judge, making it
impossible for anyone but Buriko to win, and so he needed someone to
replace her.  All your scores are reset, and the winner of tomorrows
contest will win the cup."

Akane blinked again, but this time for a much different reason.  "Uh,
Kasumi, do you know that tomorrow is the Most Passionate Kisser contest..."

Kasumi started to blush.  "Oh, my... I almost forgot!"  Akane got a little
worried.  'Ranma, why did you do this to Kasumi?'  "Ranma told me to give
you this message!"  Kasumi handed Akane a piece of paper with some
moderately legible handwriting on it.  Kasumi then smiled.  "Don't worry
about me judging the contest, though, Akane... I suggested I take over."

Akane's eyes bulged.  "You?!  B-but you-"

Kasumi smiled.  "Yes, me.  Now read your letter- Ranma seemed pretty
nervous when he gave it to me."

"Oh... okay."  Akane turned around and left the kitchen.  'What's with
Kasumi?' she wondered.

Ranma: Is Dr Tofu back in town?

*	*	*	*	*

Nabiki was counting the money Ranma had given her after she said 'If you
refuse to pay me, then I'm calling in all of your unpaid loans!' Where he
had gotten nearly 200,000 yens on such short notice was still a mystery,
but she was too preoccupied to worry about it.  "So, you think I've been
ruining the contest so far?  You're going to steal MY money because of
that?  Well, you're about to see what I do when I really want to ruin
something- I want to get my money's worth."  She knew her plan had risks,
and she would be indirectly responsible for something which could really
harm a lot of people- especially that annoying B.B.- but she had done worse
for less gain, when people closer to her that bitch could have gotten just
as hurt.  She smirked as she remembered the wedding incident.

Ranma: That... She's-she's

Akane: THAT BITCH! I will be sparring with her latter.

Ranma and Archive: Care for some help?
 

She picked up her cellular phone and dialed a number.  After the other end
picked up, Nabiki began "So, Happosai, you want to get back into this
house, huh?  Well, I have an idea, but its going to cost you..."

Ranma: Everything costs with her.
 

*	*	*	*	*

Akane opened the letter.

"Akane," it read.
"I truly loved your song, and wish you would sing more often.  I am unsure
how to respond to it, however.  I think I (a lot of words scribbled out)
feel the same way about you, but I have a lot of problems telling you.  I
intend to solve those problems tomorrow- I made arrangements to keep the
contest going for that specific purpose (Azusa was going to withdraw,
ending the tournament with your loss, until I got together with Mikado to
give the two of you a chance) and will talk to you more about it tomorrow. 
In the meantime, however, I have to prepare..."

The signature caused Akane to blink.  It had been scratched out and
rewritten about ten times, but in the end its words were, though simple,
quite meaningful.

"With all of my love, Ranma."

Akane: 0_0 (face faults)

Ranma: No matter how many fic like this there are, she still can't
	believe it.
 

There was, however, another line which caused her to laugh, breaking the
tension she felt.  "P.S.- leave the tape at home... I don't want a repeat
of the Romeo and Juliette incident."

All: (laugh) 

*	*	*	*	*

"For what purpose hast thou requested an audience of The Blue Thunder?" 
Kuno demanded.  B.B. smirked.  She walked over to Kuno and, in order to
maintain the PG rating of this fanfic, whispered something in his ear too
quiet to be overheard.  Kuno's eyes widened.  "MY LADY, I COULD NEVER-" 
B.B. put her hand over Kuno's mouth and whispered something else in his
ear.  He backed up and assumed a noblemans stance.  "My emotions are
divided enough, ma'am- and even considering such an act would betray my
beloveds-"  B.B. whispered something else in Kuno's ear, and he blinked. 
"I suppose that makes sense... very well, ma'am, I shall hire you for...
the purpose we discussed."  

All: 0_0

Akane: Gee, such noble sentiment.
 

B.B. smirked again, wrapping her arm around Kuno's.  'I've still got it,'
she thought as they began the journey from behind the Tendo Dojo to the
Kuno estate.

Behind them, a large black bird began hopping from branch to branch,
following them.

*	*	*	*	*

'Well,' Ranma thought, 'Other than Kuno, that's the last of them, and I can
call him tomorrow morning...  Everything is all set.  Now... all I have to
do is to bring myself to actually kiss her...'

Akane: You'd betterm I don't want to lose P-Chan.

Ranma: But you know he's Ryoga. Winning the pig isn't that important.

Archive: But the kiss is.

Akane: (mallets Archive) Quiet you.
 

*	*	*	*	*

A raven was staring at the scene it was flying over.  The large black bird
had a somewhat deformed leg and a bent wing, but still seemed capable of
flight.  In fact, it was carrying something as it flew.

Desaix, in his bird form, tossed the bucket of water on B.B. and Kuno,
kissing and loosening clothes on each other.  Both sputtered and turned to
see where the sudden attack had come from.

Archive: I doubt an uninjured raven could carry that.

Ranma: Strong bird.
 

"Oh, you foul fowl, for disrupting this most precious and passionate of
joinings, you shall face my wrath!"  Kuno stood up, grabbed a bokken out of
no-where, and charged at the battered bird.  Buriko, blushing terrible,
tightened the string fastening of her lace-up leather halter top, and
looked around to see what was going on.  Once she saw a black blur trying
to avoid the furious kendoist, she realized what happened, and grabbed a
table that, fortunately, was nearby.  She bashed it over the back of Kuno's
head, knocking him out.  She picked up the bird, who had crashed into the
wall trying to avoid the last swing of the bokken, and carried him with her
as she hurriedly left the mansion.

Ranma: Akane special attack - Table Smash!

Akane: Hmm, Table Smash! (Chi Table smashes into Ranma) Neat trick.
 

"Oh, you stupid bird, why did you do that?"  Buriko chastized.  Then she
sighed, carrying him to the Tendo dojo.  "I'm sorry, I know you were just
protecting me from my other self.  But you are going to get yourself in
trouble with B.B. doing this kind of thing- though I'm not sure about this
one.  She seems very confused in her feelings right now, and I gather Kuno
was just a 'see if I still can seduce them' kind of deal... she HAD given
up on her... professional life... since we started after Happosai-chan, and
wanted to 'keep in practice,' as she phrased it.  To tell you the truth, I
think that she's somewhat upset at YOU, and is taking her agression out by
engaging in... other activities.  Both of us are a little stunned by your
behaviour today- are you mad at me or something?"  Raven-Desaix shook his
head slowly.  "Well, okay then.  Just relax.  When we get home, I'll get
you some hot water, and if its not too late we'll talk about today." 
Desaix, cradled in Buriko's arms, nodded.  If he had been human, you would
have seen a small smile as he fell asleep in her arms.

Akane: Aww, that is so cute.

Archive: I hate cute.

Ranma (thought):I hate cute.
 

*	*	*	*	*

The next morning, Desaix, still a bird, woke up in his bed.  Strapped to
the back of the slightly opened door of his room was a note.
"Dez," Buriko's handwriting began.
"Good morning!  I didn't want to wake you up when we got home, you were
sleeping so peacefully.  I guess we'll talk later.  I'm still in my Buriko
form (I don't want to change back to B.B. until you become human, at least-
I'm too worried she'd try and kill you!) and will try and remain so for a
while.  Nodoka wanted to take me and Akari clothes shopping (my clothes
disappeared, and Akari didn't have many when she got here, so Ranma's
mother decided to help us replenish our wardrobe) so I probably won't be
here when you wake up in the morning.  I left the door open wide enough for
you to get out of the room, and I set your clothes up for you in the
bathroom.  I don't know when I'll be back, but I'll see you at the
contest."

Ranma: Mom sure loves to shop.
 

The rest of the letter was written shakily.  "By the way, are you still
willing to be my partner for this last contest?  I really need your help in
order to win, but you and I haven't been getting along so well recently,
but, oh, you know what I'm trying to say, I hope.  Your good friend,
Buriko."

Desaix waddled out of the door and stretched his wings.  The wing which
corresponded to his sprained arm had stiffened up, and he found he couldn't
flap well enough to fly anymore, so he wobbled as best he could on his sore
foot to the bathroom, and hopped into the bath.  After getting dressed, he
was approached by someone with a certain sheet of paper...

Archive: Who and which paper?
 
Ranma: I hate being in the dark 'bout these things.

*	*	*	*	*

Desaix was smiling a lopsided smile to himself as he waited for the kissing
contest to begin.  It was lopsided because he was trying to smile two
different ways at once.  One smile was amused- he had recently had two
people approach him to help with various stages of the same thing.  He was
sworn to secrecy, but he couldn't help but imagine what the two sides would
think when the other sprung their plan.

The other smile was sad.  Buriko, upon returning home, didn't have enough
time to talk with him before she had to get ready for the tournament. 
First, of course, she had to find out that he was willing to go through
with it, but when he said yes she had to run around adjusting her newly
bought clothes, and warm up a tea kettle, and various other little things,
but they weren't able to discuss the problems they were having.  He was
also a little sad because, while he was about to try to give B.B. the most
passionate kiss in Nerima, he would only be doing so as a friend- and not
even to B.B., but to Buriko.  He'd been planning to tell Buriko at least a
little bit of his feelings for her in that conversation they were supposed
to have, but now... he'd been building up the confidence to tell her for so
long that this setback seemed to be fate telling him to not even try.  He
sighed.

Ranma: Nice Ryoga thing going on there.
 

He looked at the assembled people.  There was B.B., who hadn't said a word
to him since she transformed.  She still seemed upset about the Kuno
incident, and Desaix knew she wouldn't forgive him until he apologized. 
Desaix also knew he would not apologize for that, since Buriko had asked
him long ago to help keep her 'original' self in check.

Ranma: She should be thanking him.
 

Kuno, standing between his sister (who herself was talking to Mikado
quietly, though she DID occasionally briefly laugh her insane little laugh)
and his child-like ninja-dressed servant, was standing among the group of
spectators. He seemed to be staring first at B.B., then at Akane, then back
at B.B., then back at Akane.  Every time he changed girls, his expression
became more and more shamed.

Akane: Ninja wa Hentai.
 

There was Mousse and, well, Desaix assumed the girl he was standing next to
with the bluish-purple hair was Shampoo.  Mousse was cleaning his glasses
while Shampoo looked about suspiciously.  Desaix shrugged- he knew almost
nothing about them, other than Akane apparently didn't like Shampoo very
much, and that Shampoo looked a LOT like B.B. did.

Akane: Don't like her? That is an understatement.
 

Ryouga decided to make an appearance as a human, with Akari on his arm.  He
had accidentally walked into her path while stretching his legs, and told
Akari that he was the 'prize' of the contest, saying that Akane was trying
to win him 'so as to keep him from having to reveal his curse to
strangers.'

Archive: Well, that's the reason she told him.

Akane: Table Smash! (Chi table hits Archive) I told you to be quiet.

There were still other wierd characters in the group of spectators.  There
was a guy with a broom strapped on his back, who was asking everyone
repeatedly who they were.  There was some wierd guy with dark circles under
his eyes and candles strapped on his head.  There was a girl holding a bowl
of ramen twirling noodles in the air.  Then there was a... was it a guy or
girl? holding a oversized spatula.  There were dozens of other men (many of
whom Desaix recognized from the singing contest) and women, all of whom
were looking at either Akane or Ranma with stars in their eyes, but Desaix
sensed a certain tension among them all.  He fingered his walking stick
nervously, worried that another riot was about to start.

Archive: Nabiki odds of riot. Bet 10 yen, if riot get back 5 yen.
 

Also on hand was Ranma's and Akane's family.  They had arrived, uninvited,
and the match was being delayed long enough for them to set up some video
equipment.  Both Ranma and Akane stared at them nervously.

Ranma: Do they have to do that every time?

Archive: Yes. They'd be OOC if they didn't.
 

A notable exception, however, was Nabiki.  Desaix mentally shrugged- he'd
heard that Nabiki had gone ballistic when she was removed as the tournament
judge, but he assumed that she wouldn't want to miss this- this event would
be unforgettable.  Apparently, he was wrong.

*	*	*	*	*

Nabiki walked into the kitchen, looking for a snack.  A note was stuck to
the refrigerator door, addressed to her, from Kasumi.  Nabiki shrugged,
pulled it out from underneath the panda-shaped magnet, and read it.  Then
she read it a second time.  Then a third.  Then a fourth.  Every time she
read it, she had a certain thought repeat itself, each time growing in
strength.

All: What does the note say?
 

'Uh oh... Ranma and Akane are REALLY going to kill me this time...'

Akane: You were doubting that before?
 

*	*	*	*	*

Akane, looking nervously at the large crowd of spectators, turned to Ranma
worriedly.

"Ranma... I don't like the look of this.  Who told all these people about
this contest?  Do you think Nabiki somehow told them?  I'd be surprised if
she did, because we didn't even tell her where this was being held!"

Ranma: Please, if Nabiki wanted to know, she would know.
 

Ranma put a hand behind his head.  "Oh... no, she didn't tell them..."

Akane looked at him suspiciously.  "Then who did?"

"Er... I... did."

Ranma: Why would I do that? I'm not suicidal.

Akane: No, just masochistic.

Ranma: Sadist. (flinches) Aren't you hoing to hit me?

Akane: No. (grins)

Ranma: Argh!
 

"WHAT?  Why in the world did you-"

At that moment their parents finished setting up the video equipment. 
"Okay, contestants," Kasumi said, drawing everyone's attention, "We're
ready to begin!  The girl with the most passionate kiss in the quickest
amount of time wins!"

Akane: Ranma, you had better make this good.
 

Akane broke off what she was about to ask Ranma and turned to him.  Her
face began to get red as the realization of what they were about to do hit
her with full force.  Ranma, himself, was swallowing uncomfortably, his
right hand still behind his head.

Akari turned to Ryouga, and smiled at him.  "I suppose you need to go,
now."

Ryouga turned to her, a little sadly.  "Yeah, I suppose I do.  They're
going to need a prize to award, after all."  Akari grabbed him by the
shoulders, sliding her hands up and down his arms.

She drew him towards her suddenly and kissed him deeply.  When she
withdrew, a little trickle of blood could be seen coming out of his nose. 
"See you soon," she giggled, as he slowly staggered off to the back of a
building, where he doused himself with cold water and walked (in pig form)
into his cage.

Archive: (grins)
 

As he did, Soun walked over to Kasumi and whispered something to her. 
About halfway through, she gasped "Oh, my!" and raised her hand to cover
her mouth.  When her hand moved away, her usual smile had been replaced by
the smile she usually had when she wanted to keep from laughing at Dr.
Tofu.

Akane: What are they up to this time?

Archive: (whistles, failing to be inconspicuous)
 
Akane: You know what's going on don't you. (waves hammer menacingly at
	Archive)

Archive: N-n-nothing. I know nothing. Eh, just read the story.

Mikado was attempting to calm Kodachi and to keep her from killing Azusa
after she found out exactly what kind of contest this was.  He was having a
very difficult time of it, but had thus far avoided being gassed or
poisoned.

Ranma: He's better than I thought.
 

Desaix turned to B.B., and bit his lip nervously.  In her eyes, Desaix saw
something out of the ordinary.  He wasn't sure what it was, but he thought
that it was simple revulsion at having to kiss him.  'Oh, well,' he
mentally sighed.

"I don't think we stand a chance.  You don't have to do this is you don't
want to," Desaix said to her quietly enough so that he wouldn't be
overheard.

B.B. blinked, surprised.  "What are you talking about?  This is me!  Trust
me, even if you do lack experience, I AM very capable of making this kiss
quite passionate."  That last sentence was said with a hint of spite.

Desaix half-smiled.  "Promise, if I explain to you, you won't say or do
anything about it?"  

She shrugged, thinking 'What is he talking about?' before nodding in the
affirmative.  Desaix pointed at Ranma and Akane.  She turned to face them,
and her eyes widened.  "Is that a-"

"Shh," he broke in.  "And yes, it is."

B.B. thought about it for a second, before turning back towards Desaix and
cocking her head.  "Big deal.  We should still try- I refuse to quit this
contest.  I want that pig, and I will do anything I can to get it!"

Nabiki: Anything?

Archive: How did you get here?

Akane: Nabiki no BBBBAAAAAKKKKKAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!! (Mallet goes through
	Nabiki.)

Nabiki: Sorry sis. I'm using a hologram from a sci-fi fic. I'm not stupid
	enough to be near you until this fic ends.
 

Before Desaix could Reply, Kasumi once again spoke.  "People, you may...
commence... at any time!"

Akane, trembling, started to move in on Ranma, but with his left arm he
stopped her.  "Akane, wait... there's something I want to tell you
first..."  Akane looked into his eyes, just as she had when she was singing
for him the previous day.  He stopped right there, returning the stare, not
able to say anything else.

Mikado, with Kodachi glaring at him, nervously pecked Azusa on the lips. 
Azusa, however, did not appreciate his brevity, and began whining. 
"MIKADO!  Azusa wants her Charlotte!  If you no kiss Azusa better than
that, Azusa loses her Charlotte!  Kiss Azusa better!"  She began banging
him on the head, and everyone turned was so startled that they turned to
watch.  Before she could get very far, however, Kodachi intervened.

Akane: Maybe we can shut her up with a cat. Shampoo, can you come over
	here for a moment.
 

The resulting confusion was enough to break Ranma out of his mental lock,
and, as he turned back to face Akane, he had a new look of determination in
his face.  When she was facing him again, he took a deep breath to calm
himself and began a little speech.

"Akane... I did invite all these people here.  I did it for a reason."  He
raised his voice a bit, so that everyone would hear.  "I invited these
people here so that they can see that I have finally decided.  Akane,
yesterday, you sang a very beautiful song for me.  It convinced me it
was... okay... to tell you this.  Akane, I love you- I love you more than
life itself.  And, loving you as I do... I want to make it official."  He
got down on one knee, and pulled his hand back from behind his head,
revealing a small box.  With a practised motion, he opened the box to
reveal a diamond ring.  "Akane, will you now WILLINGLY become my wife?"

Archive: (grins)

Akane: 0_0 (face faults)
 

The entire Tendo and Saotome clan facefaulted, Kasumi included.  On the
sidelines, all of the women save Akari gasped.  The men, however, were
waiting desperately for Akane's response.

Archive: Danger. Danger. Sense riot about to happen.
 

B.B., who had turned with Desaix to face Ranma and Akane to watch the
proposal they knew was coming, grasped his hand unconsciously.  Desaix
blinked and looked at B.B.  She was smiling, seemingly daydreaming.

Akane looked at Ranma, eyes wider than they had ever been as she stared at
the ring.  Tears started to form as she put her hand on Ranma's, and
grasped the ring.  "Of course, you dummy!"  She put the ring on her finger
and pulled Ranma up and into her arms.  They approached each other, and
their lips touched.  The kiss continued for quite some time.  Everyone in
the stands stood stock still, shocked.

Ranma: You could've just said yes.
 
Akane: But then I'd OOC. I have to insult you, Baka.

Still unconsciously grasping Desaix's hand, B.B. whispered to him "I could
beat that... but I don't think I want to.  I'm not heartless!"  Desaix was
still staring at her strangely, and B.B. was about to ask him why when the
riot started.

Archive: Big surprize here.
 

It was as he pulled away to protect that she realized she had been holding
his hand.  For the first time in a long time, she blushed as B.B.  'Now,
why was I doing that?'  she asked.  'I mean, I realize I was caught up in
the moment, but why HIM?  I don't feel anything for him in this form... do
I?'  She turned away from the army of Ranma and Akane suitors to think
about things.

Ranma and Akane, themselves, were oblivious to everything,

Archive: They normally are.

Ranma and Akane: (pounds on Archive.)

still engaged in their kiss. 
Seeing this, Genma, Soun, and Nodoka decided to protect their
children, and moved to join Desaix protecting the couple.

Archive: Genma and Soun didn't run away?
 

"Why are you protecting them, Desaix," Nodoka asked, ducking a flying slice
of fish sausage.

Archive: Because he's also a masochist?

Ranma: Your one?

Archive: No.

Akane: Are you sure?
 

Desaix smiled despite being smashed in the stomache with a brush handle,
whose owner promptly forgot why he had thrown the blow in the first place
before being motivated to renew his attack after once again seeing Ranma
and Akane kissing.  "Well, I'm beginning to consider Ranma something of a
friend- he and I have been confidants since I got here.  In fact, I gave
him the money to buy Akane's ring.  But, besides all that, look at
them-wouldn't you defend those two, even if you didn't know them?"  Desaix
sent the forgetful boy flying by pressing the button on his staff.

Nodoka smiled, sidestepping a flying noodle.  "I suppose I would..."

Desaix then saw someone who he had really felt like beating up since he met
him, and moved in.  Kuno, himself, had been fighting on, silently for once,
and was performing better than he ever had in his life.  He had just sent
Soun flying as Desaix reached him, and turned with a swing that could have
cut through steel.

Ranma: Everyone wants to beat on Kuno.
 

Desaix sidestepped, retracting the extension of his walking stick.  "I'm
sick of you, Kuno.  FIRST, you knock B.B. out, and then you seduce her!"

That caused Kuno to speak again.  "I!  Seduce HER!  BY WHAT RIGHT DO YOU
CHARGE ANY FROM THE HOUSE OF KUNO WITH SUCH IMPROPRIETIES!  I SHALL MAKE
THEE PAY!"

Nabiki hologram: Will that be cash or charge?

Archive: How did you get the hologram projector?

Nabiki: Information has a price.

Archive: Argh!
 

Desaix ducked to avoid a slash from Kuno's bokken, and pressed the button
on his staff as the sword flashed overhead.  The extension came up behind
the flat of the bokked, and Desaix knocked the sword downwards with his
staff.  Using his free hand, Desaix began wheel punching Kuno in the nose
and jaw.  After his forearm had its circles six times, Desaix dropped his
staff and brought his other hand in to iron palm punch Kuno across Nerima.

Archive: And it's ahigh flying Kuno going into center field.
	Going..going...gone! 
 
Ranma and Akane: (cheer) YEAH!

He rolled to avoid a bonbori as he picked his walking stick back up.  He
turned, and smashed the two bonbori.  Seeing Mousse behind the Amazon girl,
he shouted "Mousse!  If you don't want Shampoo to get hurt, get her out of
this fight NOW!"  Shampoo pulled a giant sword out of nowhere ('Mousse not
only one who can hide weapons!' she thought), and swung it at Desaix.  He
blocked with the extension of his walking stick, and sparks flew as the
metal of Shampoo's sword slid down the metal of Desaix's weapon.  She drew
back to swing again before chains wrapped themselves all around her.

Ranma: He didn't miss? Blind-boy actually caught Shampoo.

Akane: To bad he's an Amazon male.
 

"Come on, Shampoo," Mousse shouted.  "Ranma has decided, and he doesn't
love you nor does he want to marry you.  This fight is pointless- it will
only anger him and get you hurt!"  Shampoo didn't have much say in the
matter, as Mousse pulled her away.

Akane: Shampoo not say anything. She should be screaming bloody murder.

Archive: One of the chains wrapped around her mouth, preventing her from
	speaking. Happy?

Akane: If he never takes that chain off.
 

A hockey stick was swung at him from some unknown Akane Tendo fan, and
Desaix barely blocked it in time.  His tardiness was punished by having his
weapon break at the point where a man clawed through it, a bokken cleaved
it, and an Amazon sword slid into it.  Desaix stared at the broken piece
lying on the ground as the hockey stick came down over his head.

It rapped him on the head, causing a small cut to open up, but the blow
would have been much more serious if a giant spatula hadn't caught the
weapon before it could finish its near killing blow.

Archive and Ranma: GO UCCHAN!

Akane: (scowls at Archive and Ranma.)
 

"Need a hand, sugar?" Ukyo asked him, knocking the hockey stick away. 
Desaix, quite dazed, merely looked at her wide eyed and nodded.  Ukyo
grimaced, seeing the blood trickle from the back of his head across his
neck and down to his neck.  Then she turned on the man who had been using
the stick, and shouted fiercely.  "STOP THIS!  NOW!"  Everyone, save Ranma
and Akane (who were still kissing and were quite oblivious to everything),
turned to her in surprise.  "This has gone on FAR too long!  Ranma and
Akane have made there decision!  They probably made it long ago,"  Tears
formed at the corners of her eyes, "but I was too blind to see it.  I
thought that doing what you are trying to do know would help me win
Ranchan's heart, but... all you will do is drive the person you're after
further away!  It isn't worth this fight.  Look at this!"  She pointed to
Desaix.  "You nearly killed someone, just because he was trying to keep
Ranchan and Akane from being blindsided and mauled by you guys!  Give it
up!  You've lost!  If you truly love them, let them go..."  The tears
started flowing.  "as I had to..."

Akane: (tears in her eyes) She is such a good friend.

Ranma: (nodded) The best.

Archive: (grinning) Think I can ask her out on a date?

Ranma: NO!
 

The people who had been rioting, one by one, started leaving the scene. 
They had been less influenced by her words as by her face when she said
those words- they were all quite aware of who she was, and all knew how
much she had loved Ranma.  If she was going to protect the couple, what
right had they to oppose her?

Ranma: If Kuno was there, he'd fight on.
 

As the crowd dissipated, a three foot tall, three hundred year old master
of martial arts looked on.  Now was his time to strike.

All:(very sarcastic) Oh joy. 
 

*	*	*	*	*

Nabiki ran through the streets, carrying some thermos's of hot water.  'Way
to go, Nabiki,' she chastized herself.  'You don't even have the excuse of
making money for this one!  You let anger cloud your judgement to the point
of making such a stupid plan as this!  And for what?  Just to get revenge
for something as stupid as being judge over this contest!  Ranma and Akane
are REALLY going to kill me over this one!'  She sighed.  'Well, at least I
can try and make it up to them partially by trying to bring them this hot
water- knowing how attracted to cold water these cursed people are, I
suspect it'll come in handy.'

Akane: A little hot water won't redeem her.
 

She was so absorbed by her thoughts that she didn't notice the little cage
in front of her until she tripped over it.

*	*	*	*	*

Nodoka, Soun, and Genma were starting to take down the video equipment they
had brought, B.B. had splashed herself with water to become Buriko and was
talking quietly with Ukyo and Akari, and Desaix was wiping the blood off of
himself using some bandages from a first aid kit Kasumi had with her when
Ranma and Akane finally broke their kiss.  They were still staring into
each other's eyes, however, smiling widely, when Kasumi came up to them.

"I'm sorry, you two, but you only came in second."

Ranma and Akane: WWWHHHHAAAAATTTTTT??????

Archive: (grins)
 

The two blinked, and facefaulted, turning towards Kasumi.

Desaix, himself, was stunned.  Less so, however, than Ranma and Akane- he
was actually able to talk.  "How could you possibly come to the conclusion
that there was a kiss more passionate than THAT, Kasumi?"

Kasumi smiled.  "Oh, my, I couldn't do that.  I rated their kiss a ten. 
But, as the rules you agreed to before this contest started clearly states,
their is also the matter of which girl gets her partner to kiss her first. 
When the points for that are figured in, you two are just BARELY squeezed
by."

Ranma blinked.  "Who?  Azusa and Mikado?"

Archive: (shakes head)

Akane: You know who what's going on! Tell me!

Archive: Just wait.
 

Kasumi's smile broadened.  "Oh, my, no.  They were the second couple to
kiss- they got three points for the time and two points for the kiss- that
was a very nice kiss those two had, but it was more sisterly than
passionate."

Desaix frowned.  "But... B.B. and I haven't even kissed yet- we basically
decided there was no way we could match that kiss, and we were the only
other couple participating!"

Kasumi laughed.  "If you recall what I said at the beginning, the girl with
the most passionate kiss in the shortest amount of time wins.  I didn't say
that the girl had to be Akane, Azusa, or Buriko.  No, the winner of the
tournament is Akari, who had a kiss which rated an seven before anyone
else.  So, she gets the five points for the first kiss, and added to the
seven that gives her twelve points.  You people had a kiss I rated a ten,
but because you were the third couple to initiate a kiss, you only get one
point for time and so end up with eleven points."

Archive: (chuckles)

Akane: Oh well. Lost P-Chan. But that was some kiss. (blushes)
 

Ranma, trying to keep his elation at no longer having to deal with P-Chan
in, turned to Akane.  "I'm sorry that you lost your pet, Akane-"

Akane laughed.  "Oh, don't worry about it.  Ryouga... told me he was P-Chan
when Akari showed up."  At Ranma's panicked look, Akane squeezed his
shoulder.  "I don't blame you- Ryouga's the one at fault.  Its probably a
good thing that I lost, anyway.  I fully accept your decision, Kasumi-
Akari is the winner!"

Ranma: BWAHAHA! Now Akari owns Ryoga.

Akane: Like she didn't before?
 

'Wait a minute,' Ranma thought, 'If Akane knew two days ago about P-Chan,
than why...'

"Hear that, Akari?"  Desaix's shout over to her interrupted his thoughts. 
"You won the co- ohhhh!"  He grabbed his head as the mild concussion he had
recieved in the fight kicked in.  Buriko ran over to him.

"Desaix, are you..."  She noticed something in the distance, and blinked. 
She couldn't believe what- or actually, who- she was seeing.  "Ha...
Happosai-chan!?  HAPPOSAI-CHAN!"  She sprinted over to the little martial
artist, who had just turned the corner heading into the empty lot that the
contest had been held in.  Ranma and Akane, still with their arms wrapped
around each other, both winced in disgust as she picked him up with one arm
and squeezed his cheek with another, spinning him and sighing
"Haaaappooosaaaiiiii-Chaaaaan!" as she spun him in the air.  Desaix dizzily
looked up at the scene, and slowly stood up.  He reached for his walking
stick, and then remembered that it had snapped in two and was no longer of
any use, even to help him stand.  He limped forward, towards Buriko.

Ranma and Akane: Happosai-chan? Ewwww....

Archive: Spew and a half.
 

Happosai took out his pipe and flicked Buriko away.  She sat up, stunned.

"What's going on?" Ukyo, sidling up to Ranma and Akane, asked.

"Er, well," Ranma began, "As near as I can figure out from what Desaix has
told us, Happosai gave Buriko a love potion.  It kinda backfired, because
it made her so obsessed with him that... well... he's terrified of her...
affections."  Ukyo laughed.  The idea that the worlds biggest pervert would
be scared of some hugs and kisses from as attractive a woman as Buriko
amused her.

Archive: Everyone loves irony.

Ranma: I don't.

Archive: Er, when it happens to someone else.

Ranma: (nods)
 

"Happosai-chan, what's the matter?"  Buriko asked sadly.  "I just want to
pinch your little cheeks!"  She started to run back towards him.

"GET AWAY FROM ME, YOU BITCH!"  Happosai shouted.  Ukyo stopped laughing,
Buriko stumbled and fell to her knees in heartbreak, and everyone else
facefaulted.  Everyone but Desaix, that is.  Something in him snapped, and
he started staggering towards Happosai.  The pain in his head was
excrutiating, and the disruption of his concentration the concussion cause
made it impossible for him to ignore the pain in his arm and leg. 
Happosai, seeing his weakened condition, essentially ignored his approach. 
"I've tried running from you, I've tried tossing you away, and I've tried
doing things which I know you hate, and I CAN'T get you away from me!  What
will it take to get you to realize that I want nothing to do with you!"  He
pulled out one of his firecracker bombs.  "In fact, I want you dead!"  He
lit the bomb and tossed it at her.

In the last moment before it would have hit her, Desaix jumped in front,
landing awkwardly on his bad foot.  Crying out in pain, he put what
remained of his strength into a massive iron palm to the bomb, shattering
it and sending the pieces flying everywhere.  Desaix stumbled and fell to
his knees and grabbed his aching head in his hands, too worn and battered
after the three days of sporatic battles to even lift his head up to face
Happosai.

"You aren't good enough to fight me, boy.  Don't throw your life away
needlessly- stand aside and let me finish her!"

"NO!"  Desaix cried.  Forcing his head up, he lifted himself up off the
ground and stood, gasping for breath as his head spun.  The cut on his head
was bleeding again, he could feel, but he didn't really have enough time to
think about that.  "I am this woman's protector.  It is my duty to see that
she is unharmed by the likes of you!"  The act of shouting caused his
vision to blur again, but he tried not to let it show.

Happosai started moving closer.  "Is that all?  Give up, boy!  It may be
your duty to protect this woman, but you are not physically capable of
doing so.  You have done your best!  If the only reason you are trying to
protect her is because of 'duty,' then leave this fight now!"

Archive: Sometimes duty and honor exceeds ones self worth. Ah, but in this
	case it's love.
 
Ranma: For a seconf I thought you were going Kuno.

Desaix's eyes snapped into focus.  "There is, in fact, another reason I
fight for her- and I fully expect to die for her now, considering the shape
I'm in.  I love her- more than anything else in this world- and if you are
going to kill her, then I don't want to be around to see it.  But you will
have to get by me, first!"

Akane: Joy, hero complex.

Ranma: I thought you loved that I was your hero.

Akane: One of these days, I'll be the one to save you.
 

Buriko facefaulted.  'He loves me?  But... he's been so cross with me
lately... and he's never returned any affections I have shown him... and...
and...'  She looked at the bleeding, limping form of Desaix, standing
between her and the man she thought she loved but who wanted to kill her. 
But she knew she didn't really love him- he had drugged her into believing
she loved him.  But if she didn't love him, then... what was her purpose? 
She didn't really feel worthy of being a priestess, with her normal form
and all, but she couldn't stand the thought of following B.B.'s profession.
 So... why had she stayed at the temple all those months?

Archive: Same reason Ranma never went back to China.

Ranma: What's that suppose to mean?
 

"Very well, boy," Happosai smirked evilly.  "If you want to die, I can
oblige you- but first, for angering me, I think that you should see
yourself fail!  BEANJAM BLOWOUT!"  Happosai launched the chi attack,
knocking Desaix out of his way and back onto his head, and darted for
Buriko.  A palm shining a darker blue than he had ever seen before stopped
him and slammed him into the ground.  Happosai blinked- Desaix was once
again standing in front of him, but this time he was smiling- and glowing
with angry chi.

Archive: Oohhh, Happy is in trouble.
 

"Thanks, Happy, you knocked me back into fighting form!  But, for daring to
harm Buriko, you must PAY!"  Desaix began throwing fierce iron palms. 
Happosai first tried blocking, but his arms were burned by the intensity of
the battle aura that surrounded him.

Buriko blinked.  Desaix had always controlled his chi before- he had never
glowed for more than a few seconds, and he normally was smiling afterwards.
 'Oh, gods,' she realized, 'he's concentrated all of the anger and despair
he has experienced inside himself, and he's built up a battery of chi with
it.  Now, because Happosai threatened me, he's going to release it all...'

Ranma: Good thing he doesn't know Shi Shi Hokadan.

Akane: Why?

Archive: How does one block blast radius sound to you?
 
Akane: Yeah, good thing.

Ranma: I just hope Ryoga never does that.

Archive: (shivers) (thinking of a scene from Akira.)

Happosai started trying to counterattack, but his blows were ignored and
the openings that the strikes he attempted allowed Desaix to pummel him
that much harder.  Happosai tried bounding away, but eventually was backed
first into a lamp post and then into a wall.  'This boy isn't as skilled as
Ranma, who's the only one who has ever come close to beating me before, or
even Genma or Soun.  How come I can't stop him?  I've got to do something,
fast, or else he'll kill me!'

Desaix laughed a somewhat deranged laugh.  "FACE THE BOTTLED ANGER OF A
LIFETIME, 'HAPPY!'"  Desaix drew back to deliver a death blow, but was
stopped short by a blow of Happosai's pipe to his injured arm.  Happosai,
though relieved to finally score a blow, did not relax.  He sent another
jarring blow of the pipe to Desaix's wounded leg, causing him to fall. 
Desaix's glow died, and he merely watched as Happosai ran up to deliver a
death blow to himself.  Just as Happosai's arm came down, however, Desaix
caught his bare wrist with his good hand, and stood up on his good leg.  "I
might not be in good enough shape to win unscathed, Happy, but I can still
keep you from killing Buriko!"  With that, Desaix iron palmed the lamp post
with his other arm, breaking it in two.  As it fell over, he reached in and
grabbed the exposed wires.  Bolts of electricity went coarsing through his
body and into Happosai's.

All: 0_o

Ranma: That's gotta hurt.

"NO!  DEZ-CHAN!  DON'T KILL YOURSELF FOR ME!"  Buriko cried, arriving a
second to late to stop him.  She turned to a horrified group of Ranma,
Akane, and Ukyo, and cried out to them "Do something!  Stop this!  Now!"

Perhaps it was because they were partially grounded, or perhaps it was
because they had added endurance from their martial arts training, but
Desaix and Happosai were still alive by the time Ranma reacted.  Grabbing a
stunned Ukyo's throwing spatula, he sent it flying, cutting the lines
Desaix was holding on to.  Desaix collapsed, still holding a badly injured
Happosai.  Buriko ran over to the two of them, addressing Desaix first.

"You macho pig!"  She cried softly, cradling his head.  "Why did you do
that!  I've told you before, I can take care of myself- I don't need your
protection!  Why!"

Archive: That sounds familuar.

Akane: And what's that suppose to mean?
 

Happosai reached over and grabbed Buriko.  Despite the revulsion that had
grown in him for that girl, he could still heal himself using her to fuel
his pervert power.  He stood up.  "A good attempt, you foolish guardian of
this woman, but you failed.  Now, while you still have life in your body,
see your beloved die!"  He drew out another of his bombs, and was about to
light it when a pair of flying kicks caught him in the chest.

'Oh, great.  Just what I needed.  More interruptions- and Nabiki said this
would be easy to do!' Happosai thought.  Between him and Buriko stood a
united and very angry Ranma and Akane.

Ranma: Easy? When is anything easy?

Akane: Especially in Nerima.
 

"Give it up, you old troll!"  Ranma shouted.  "Desaix and Buriko are me...
OUR friends, and we won't let you harm them!"

Happosai sighed.  "Oh, very well, Ranma, me boy, if you want a fight,
you've got it!"  Happosai finally started getting his bombs off, and was
tossing them left and right.  In the smoke screen created by all the
explosions, he had ample time to use his battle aura growth attack.  The
giant Chi-Happosai spun out of the way of a Moko Takabishi, though its
dodge sent it straight into Akane's massive kick.  "BEANJAM BLOWOUT!" the
monstrosity cried out, and the couple was blasted out of the lot.  Happosai
shrunk down to his normal size, and started charging in on Buriko and
Desaix.  Buriko, still taking care of Desaix, crying while putting
makeshift bandages over his many wounds, didn't even notice Happosai
charging in.  Happosai was stopped once more from his destination, however,
by a dripping wet Ryouga's umbrella block.  "AAAGH!  IS EVERYONE AND HIS
BROTHER GOING TO TRY AND STOP ME!"  Happosai cried.

Ranma: Not to mention pet pigs.

Akane: (Mallets Ranma)
 

Nabiki walked into the scene, carrying an empty thermos.  Ukyo, Genma,
Nodoka, and Soun also appeared to join the fight as Ranma and Akane
re-appeared on the scene.  "Yes, they are," Nabiki said.  Everyone had
finally had enough of Happosai.

Ranma: I had enough of him a long time ago.
 

"No, they aren't," Buriko said.  "Mrs. Saotome, would you please look after
Dez-chan for me?"  Nodoka, seeing her sincere expression, nodded and walked
over to Desaix, and began tending to his wounds as Buriko stepped towards
Happosai.  "Happosai, I am not going to let you harm anyone else.  Your
quarrel is with me- don't take it out on these others."  She fell into a
fighting stance.  "But I warn you, Dez-chan trained me to be a better
fighter than even he was, and you felt how much he could beat you up!"

Akane: Tempered anger makes a great weapon.

Ranma: (shudders)
 

Happosai smirked.  "So be it," he said.  He darted for her, but she flipped
over him, her front foot smacking him in the back of the head as she
passed.  She spun around before he could, and delivered a massive backhand
to the body, knocking him across the lot.  He stood up angrily.  "Okay, no
more mister nice guy!"  He pulled out and tossed a dozen of his lit bombs
at her.  In one sweeping motion, she punted all of them right back at him. 
They went off just as they reached him, further angering him.  He charged
again, this time determined to hit her no matter what.  She rolled, picking
up a loose stone, and tossed it dead center for his forehead.

Happosai succeeded in dodging the rock, but failed to account for the open
mouth of a giant sumo pig being ridden by a very familiar girl.  With one
bite, the founder of the Anything Goes School of Martial Arts was no longer
a concern.

All: 0_0
 

"When the fighting started, I figured I should find Katsunishiki," Akari
said, smiling.  "Did I miss anything?"

Archive: Oh my God! They killed Happosai!

Ranma: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH!!!!

Akane: Grandfather Happosai is dead... At least now I'll know who took my
	panties when they disappear.

 

*	*	*	*	*

Desaix opened his eyes slowly.

"AARGH!  Turn down that light, somebody!"  he cried, squinting to focus out
the harsh light.  He tried to cover his eyes with his hand, but found that
his arm wasn't moving- something was holding it down.  He turned his head
and blinked, trying to make out what the fuzzy shape that was holding his
arm down was.

"D... Dez-chan?  Are you awake?"  Buriko's voice answered.  Apparently, her
head had been what was keeping it down, as the fuzzy shape appeared to sit
up and look at him.

"Yeah, its me.  Why's it so bright in here?  And where am I anyway?"

Ranma: Who else would he be?
 

"You're in the hospital.  You were in a coma for nearly a week... I was so
worried."  The Buriko-voice shape reached over and hugged him gently.  "How
do you feel?"

Archive: Like a pin cushion.

Ranma: Like a pig ate me and spit me out.

Akane: I'm in pain, from those jokes.
 

Desaix tried to shrug.  "I dunno- a bit stiff, and I can't see a thing. 
Um, what happened?"

Buriko blinked.  "You mean you don't remember the fight?"

"Fight?  What fi- oh, yeah.  I remember now.  I survived it?  But what
about Happosai?  If he's still out there, he might find out where you are
and-"

"Shh..." she whispered.  "Happosai... isn't a problem any more.  Everyone
kinda got together and helped out- believe it or not, though, he was
finished off by a GIGANTIC pig... you wouldn't believe it if you saw it."

Archive: The greatest prevert in the world sollowed by a pig.

Akane: So that makes you the greatest pervert now. Eh Ranma.

Archive: Akane, you have no clue at how many people rank above Ranma.
	(thinking: myself included.)
 

Desaix chuckled lightly.  "Well, if I saw it right now and its as large as
you seem to be saying, I probably would take it as my mind playing tricks
on me."  Buriko laughed as well.  Then she turned serious.

"So... why didn't you ever tell me you loved me before?"

Desaix sighed.  He still couldn't make out Buriko, and so couldn't see her
expression when she said it.  He thought, for a moment, that she was mad at
him for loving her.  "I... I couldn't take the chance.  If I told you and
you left me because of it, I would have lost you.  I figured, also, that at
least one side of you wouldn't return my love."

Ranma: The man should've faced his fears took the chance.

Archive: Then why does it take you months if not years to tell Akane after
	you realize you loved her?

Ranma: Grrrr..

Akane: (giggles)
 

"But you DO love me?  And not my other personality?"

Desaix smiled carelessly.  "I wouldn't say that.  I love both of your
forms, but... well... your Buriko personality is so innocent that I can't
see it returning my feelings the same way, and your B.B. personality is
so... promiscuous... that I was worried that she would think 'Why take
Desaix when I can have any man I want?'  But... I love them both, because
they both are a part of the same person- YOU.  And that's who I love."

Buriko put a hand to his chin.  "I don't think you were right.  I... I love
you too, Dez-chan.  I didn't realize it until I saw you nearly die trying
to stop Happosai, but... well, to be honest, my love for you is what broke
the 'spell' he had me under, and that was when I knew."  She kissed him
lightly on the nose.  "Next time you need to tell someone something
important like that, though, you should pick a better time!"  She gave him
another gentle hug before standing up, sighing.  "I'd better call and tell
the doctor and the others that you've woken up."

Desaix smiled.  "Well, I am still quite tired.  I think I'll take a nap
while you call in the others.  Good night, Buriko."

"THAT'S B.B.!"  she quietly shouted, gently thwapping him on the arm. 
Desaix did his best lying-down facefault as she turned to leave.  Then she
turned back.  "Oh, yeah, by the way, I was told to tell you something when
you woke up..."

*	*	*	*	*

Desaix winced as he pulled the last piece of his shinto robes over his
hospital gown.  "You know, I really don't need to be here for this."

Nodoka laughed loudly- something which really wasn't advisable in the
hospital Chapel, as it was a bit small and loud outbursts tended to carry. 
"Of course you do!  We want all of our friends to be here for this, and I
think by now you qualify."

"That's not what I meant," Desaix said, adjusting the folds of his clothing
so as to cover up all the bandages.  "A shinto priest ISN'T required for a
shinto wedding."

Ranma and Akane: Look at each other.

Akane: Rather short 'official' engagement.
 

"True," Ranma said, smiling at Akane in her wedding dress as he arrived. 
"But we wanted this to be special.  Should we start?"

The wedding went smoothly, with no ex-fiancees throwing fits (Shampoo was
there, but she had been invited only on the condition that her arms and
legs be firmly tied to a chair, so as to prevent her from killing anyone. 
So were the Kuno's, but Nabiki, in order to help 'make up' for the Happosai
incident, was keeping them under control) or old rivals seeking vengeance
(Ryouga was the best man, Mousse was trying to calm Shampoo down, and, as
was said before, Nabiki was handling Kuno).  When they reached the
traditional drink of sake, Buriko, dressed in her old shinto robes, leaned
over to Desaix and whispered in his ear "Maybe you and I can do that, one
of these days," causing him to blush deeply.

Archive: (grins) I wonder how long it will be before Nabiki unties Kuno.
	(recieves an electric shock.)

Nabiki Hologram: (Holding something that looks like a remote control.)
	Don't go there.

Ranma: Or how 'bout Mousse with Shampoo.

Archive: He'd have to have a death wish. (thinks a second) He just might
	try it.
 

After the wedding, Ranma and Akane came up to Desaix and Buriko to thank
them for coming and for all of their help in the preparations.

"Oh, it was nothing," Desaix replied.  "Kasumi had actually asked me to
prepare to marry you two on the day of the kissing contest.  I even had
your marriage license ready then, but so many things happened that...
well... you know."  Ranma and Akane nodded.

Ranma: In Nerima, anything can happen.
 

"So," Akane asked.  "Are you guys going back to your temple, now that this
Happosai thing has been settled?"

Buriko looked at Desaix questioningly when he shrugged.  "I dunno.  I've
rather enjoyed this little trip Buriko and I have had, despite it almost
literally costing me an arm and a leg to finally admit to her how I feel. 
I was thinking about retiring from the priesthood- at least temporarily. 
It doesn't really suit Buriko, with her... problem and all."  She thwapped
him on the ribs (one of the few safe places to hit him, she found)
muttering something about a 'Sexist notions' as he continued.  "After all
this, maybe she and I could open up a dojo of our own- provide you two with
a little competition."

Ranma laughed.  "Well, you two DID beat Happosai for good, which is
something I've never been able to do.  It just might work!"

Akane: Ranma saying someone might be better? Isn't that a little OOC?

Ranma: Hey.
 

A nurse came in, and whispered something to Buriko, who nodded.  "Well,"
Buriko said, "Dez-chan needs to be going now... its his DOCTOR ISSUED rest
time."

Desaix glared at her before raising a glass of sparkling cider (the
hospital forbade champagne).  "To a wonderful life together for you both,"
he toasted, downing his drink before offering an arm to Buriko, who took
it.

"Enjoy the honeymoon!"  Buriko called jokingly as they started leaving.

Desaix blushed.  He turned to her as they opened the door.  "Just which
form are you in now, anyways?"

Ranma and Akane laughed as they departed.  Then they turned and left
themselves to do just what Buriko had suggested.

Archive: (grins) Hon-ey-moon.

Akane: (Mallets Archive) Hentai!

Archive: So.
 

-------------------------------------

FINALLY!  Finished.  You know, this was originally supposed to be a short,
one part fic which wouldn't have taken more than a week, and now its a
seven part fanfic which is actually larger than the 'Big Guy' I've been
talking about is!  (Of course, the Big Guy is only a third of the way
finished, has two prequels released now and will have at least one more
before I can release any of the main story... I suppose, adding up what I
have written and the prequels, its ALMOST as long... but, then again, its
unfinished, like I said)

This fic changed dramatically from the way I had it planned.  For their
encouragement and for (more than a line or two) of comments or criticism, I
would like to thank Harper, Lord Archive, The RAMS (as soon as I was able
to figure out how to send him missing parts...), and Wright, all of whom
pointed out a thing or two (that I was doing right or wrong) or made a
suggestion (if you don't like Akari winning the match, don't blame me! ;-)

Archive: I'm to blame on this one. 

Ranma and Akane: (Glares at Archive) Why YOU?!

Archive:(hands raised in the always fails to work Takahashi ward off pain)
	I also suggested Ranma gives Akane the engagement ring.

Ranma and Akane: (relax and sits down)

which helped me with this fanfic (and, in the process, made it much longer
than I had, in my wildest imaginings, could possibly have guessed it to end
up)

Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this.  I think I'll take about a week off of
writing (and get re-aquainted with my girlfriend, who, halfway through this
thing, tried to get me to work harder on it by telling me that we weren't
going out until I had it finished.  And then, of course, decided to entice
me in so many ways... well, we won't get into that) though I did promise to
do some pre-reading and such for some people, and I will take care of that
promptly.  In the meantime, enjoy, and if you have any other comments or
criticism, send them in (please!)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
---
                 dtatum@capaccess.org
                     desaix@sysnet.net
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Acropolis/7872

Archive: Great series. If the Big Guy is half as good, I know I'll enjoy
it.

Akane: It was great. Looking forward to more fics.

Ranma: (nods)

Archive: Now lets get back to Nekoken. The next scene I know you'll like.

Ranma: (grins)

Akane: (blushes)
 

*   Lord Archive the JAFO, furverted otaku that is addicted to Mtg.   *
***********************************************************************
*web page: www.mich.com/~archive   A Mtg page now, soon to have Anime *