On Thu, 30 Oct 1997, Elsa Bibat wrote:
Writing
I have been writing for a very long time.I started
writing as therapy. Therapy for a sick mind and a
wounded heart. Something that my doctor would
call a very severe psychological disorder. Let's just
say breaking into tears in the middle of an Arithmetic
class something that normal people don't do.
Yeesh. @_@
I've always had a vivid imagination. Sometimes when
I was still young I would play with the images I saw around
me and in a way magnified their beauty for me. I loved to
read fantasy stories and cartoons. I was probably the only
ten year old to finish the entire Lord of The Rings in three days.
Heheh. I had a lot of imagination as a kid (and still do, of course),
but usually it got me into more trouble than I knew how to handle. ;)
I also read Lord of the Rings at a young age, but I've lost my interest
in fantasy nowadays. Science fiction is my cup of tea.
Well, that and history. You won't believe what I managed to find while
I was on "vacation" in Albuquerque...but that's another story. ^_-
This imagination of mine has been both a help and a
hindrance for me. The dreams I have hold back the despair
and the pain. The dreams also tend to make me look kinda
weird.
I've had strange dreams before (some of which have given me story
ideas), but nothing like this...
For example, have you ever met anyone who continually
talked to himself ? Talking to himself in different accents
and mannerisms ? Constantly having that dreamy look in
his eyes ? That's what happens when I work on my stories.
I talk to myself a lot. Of course, most of the time it's in private, so
the guys in the white jackets can't complain. *grin*
Nowadays, I am editor,head writer and publisher of
a small press magazine. I'm head writer since no one seems
to want to write stories for the mag that I constantly bang out
5-10 original stories every two weeks. I post my fanfics to the
FFML for fun.
Wow. @_@
The way I write is kinda spectacular for some people when they
watch me work. If I work on something, I technically live and breathe
my work for as long as I work on it. Remember of the part of talking
to myself continually ? I say the dialogue of my characters. Each inflection,
each accent , I check out vocally. I've had acting experience so it is
quite easy for me change my voice. Each scene for the story I run through
my head and sometimes , since I work late so no one can see me,
I act it out in the room. I've been a 19th century gentleman to a peasant
serving maid.
I don't go to that length with my characters, but I *do* try to explore
their personalities as deeply as I possibly can. I guess I fall under
the category of "character author", then. Broad, sweeping plotlines are
another favorite of mine. :)
When I go out while working on a story, I tend to work on it. People
wonder if I'm crazy when they hear me mutter my character's dialogues.
I am technically possesed by my stories so to speak. The reason I write
is still there. To hold back the madness of harsh reality, to keep me safe
behind a veneer of dreams. But now there are other reasons.When people
read my mag and start to smile, laugh, cry or come up to me and say
' You're doing a good job' or request a particular chapter of the serialized
novel I write in the mag, I feel good. Being a writer , a storyteller
the second oldest occupation on the face of the earth, it makes me
feel good.
Whenever I let the hero get the girl or the lovers finally meet,
I am filled with the sense of being a creator. I weave a place faraway
for the people who read my stories. I tell them wonderful stories. I
create a place of wonder and enchantment and sometimes I paint a
picture of Reality, to help them deal with it. But my greatest reward
when I write is when a liitle child, someone who used to be me, is
given a chance to let his imagination soar with mine. To give him a
chance to escape the pressures of school,bullies and sometimes
parents. When I'm tired of telling stories, I look at some of the
people whom I was able to touch. Their smiles make me smile too.
Then I draw up the seat up towards the keyboard , put in a tape in the
stereo, Enya's ' The Memory of Trees', then I let mind soar to the worlds
that I love.
For me, reality is sometimes much more fascinating than fiction can
ever possibly be. Granted, most people won't agree with my reasons for
believing that way, but I like to think that Shakespeare was right. All
the world is a stage. The actors are playing the parts of the heroes of
a saga many thousands of years long, a saga that is bound for a
stunning, awe-inspiring, earth-shattering conclusion.
They say that the writers of science fiction typically are very accurate
forecasters of the next fifty years of scientific developments. I hope
they're right. :)
Damon Casale, damoo@universal-net.com
Spam, spam! WONDERFUL spam! ^_^
P.S. I know a good many people would be extremely offended if I tried
to relate any of that story in public, so if you're at all interested,
send me email. ;)