The Eternal Lost Lurker (EtLostLurker@hotmail.com)

Once more into the breach...

Ranma 1/2 property of...ah, hell, you know this already. Same 
bullshit applies for Sailormoon.

Nibun no Senshi Sailormoon

Episode 4: My Enemy, My Ally, My Curse

   The Sailor Senshi blinked at the piglet with the crescent moon on 
its forehead. The pig looked up at them.
   Artemis stepped forward, cautiously, peering at the creature. 
"Charon? How..."
   Charon once again spoke in his eerily quite, emotionless voice. 
"My mistress determined that Shin Sailormoon needed an advisor, and 
sent me."
   Luna shook her head. "That's not what he meant and you know it. 
The last time we saw you, one of the..." at this point, Luna 
shuddered... "One of our ancient enemies had just slashed your belly 
open and spilled your entrails."
   "And I was with you when the spark left your eyes," Artemis said. 
"You were very, very dead."
   "I got better," the pig replied. 
   Everyone facefaulted.
   "Seriously," Charon continued, "My body was destroyed, as you 
describe, in our civil war. But my soul was rescued at the last 
possible moment."
   The Senshi looked at the animals, confused. "Civil war? What's 
this about?" Minako asked.
   Luna sighed. "We'll explain it later. We have to, at any rate."
   "So your soul was saved...what about this piglet?" Artemis asked.
   "I can't be much use to Shin Sailormoon as a disembodied soul," 
Charon explained. "I had to...borrow a host body."
   Ranma's eyes widened in terror. "Not..."
   Charon cleared his throat, perfectly aware of the host's memories 
and desires. "Yes, Tendou Akane's pet piglet. That makes it more 
convenient, since I can stay here where you live."
   Ranma frowned. Charon stepped closer, and hissed where only she 
could hear, "Ryouga's fine. We'll talk about it later." Ranma visibly 
relaxed at this point.
   Ami frowned. "So, Charon is the Silver Millenium reading from 
earlier?"
   Charon nodded. "Precisely."
   Makoto frowned. "I thought Ami's computer said you merged with 
some friend of Ranko's..."
   Charon sweated. "I...ahhh...I sensed dark energy. I was 
investigating." This seemed to be accepted by the girls. Charon was 
about to begin speaking again when...
   "Ranma-kun, are you out there? ...Ara! We have guests! Welcome!"
   Ranma sweated. Kasumi stepped out onto the veranda to welcome the 
visitors. Ranma knew she had to do something quickly..."Kasumi, these 
girls have come to inquire about taking classes here at the dojo."
   "Oh! I'll go get Fa--"
   "I can handle it, Kasumi. No need to bother Tendou-san."
   Kasumi frowned. "I don't know, Ranma-kun..."
   Ranma smirked. "Hey, I gotta start sometime. I'm s'posed to take 
over the dojo someday, right?" <Please let Kasumi take the hint...>
   Kasumi pondered for a moment, then nodded. "Alright, Ranma-kun. 
I'll mention it to Father, and he'll ask you about how it went later, 
alright?"
   Ranma grinned. "Arigatou, Kasumi!" He turned to the girls. "Girls, 
follow me...the dojo's over here..." The four girls, two cats, and 
piglet followed her into the dojo.
   Kasumi blinked. Two cats? And Ranma didn't go crazy? And P-chan 
was following them..."Something strange is going on around here," she 
decided.
   
   Somewhere in the bowels of Hell, Satan shouted to his demon 
servants for a few more blankets, his teeth chattering as he shrugged 
deeper into his three overcoats.

   In the dojo, Ranma slumped against the wall, sighing. The other 
Senshi were glancing at her strangely. "Ranko? Who was that girl?" 
Minako asked.
   "That's Kasumi, Tendou-san's oldest daughter. She takes care of 
the house."
   "So, why did she keep calling you Ranma-kun?"
   Ranma shrugged. "That's just Kasumi for you."
   From the house, they heard the distinct shout of "Akane-chan! 
Could you come downstairs for a minute?"
   Ranma winced. The other Senshi raised eyebrows.
   "Anyway," Luna said, "We have a very big problem on our hands."
   "Oh, hello Ukyou-chan! Ranma-kun's with some students in the dojo, 
and will probably return shortly. Won't you come in and have some tea?
"
   Ranma bigsweated. "Please, Luna, continue..."
   "Our enemy," Luna said, casting nervous glances at everyone in the 
dojo, "Is an ancient one. They are members of the same race as 
Artemis, Charon, and myself, from the same planet..."
   "Kodachi-chan! I'm sorry, Ranma-kun isn't available at the moment..
."
   Ranma's pupils narrowed to pinpoints. Everyone cringed at the 
maniacal laughter which rang out across the complex.
   "...the cat we saw today is Apollo. He is a Fil."
   "A Fil?"
   Artemis nodded, picking up the tale. "Our homeworld is Mau, and 
that is also the name of the race of beings which Luna, Charon, and I 
come from. However, the second largest continent of Mau is Fil, where 
Apollo and his kind come from."
   "Long ago," Charon said, "Long before the Mau began to serve the 
Moon Kingdom, there was a great civil war between the Fil, who are 
very evil, very cruel beings, and the Mau. The Mau eventually won, 
forcing the entire Fil civilization off-planet in a cryostatic 
transport vessel."
   "Hello Shampoo-chan! Ranma-kun is out in the dojo..."
   Ranma's left eye began to twitch.
   Suddenly, one wall of the dojo caved in. "NIHAO!" rang a cute 
voice with a heavy Chinese accent. A girl with a lot of purple hair 
promptly attached herself to Ranma, who began to spasm violently. 
"Ranma! You happy see Shampoo! Take Shampoo date now!" She looked up, 
and frowned. "Ranma, who they?"
   "Uhhh..."
   "They not more fiancee? Ranma belong Shampoo, ugly Japanese girls! 
You no can have!"
   The Senshi were blinking in confusion, and some were more than a 
bit upset at what Shampoo had just called them. Artemis was looking 
around confusedly, while Luna sighed, a large bead of sweat rolling 
down the back of her head. 
   Now, one thing about stress, is that it has a habit of altering 
behavior patterns. With the stress of having to pretend to be a girl, 
and being a Sailor Senshi, combined with everyday stress, and now the 
matter of what could end up as an ugly conflict between the other 
Senshi and Shampoo, probably dragging the rest of Nerima into the mix 
in the process...
   Ranma snapped. She grabbed Shampoo's shoulders and forced her away.
 "Ranma...?" Shampoo asked. 
  "Get..." Ranma shoved Shampoo toward the hole she'd made in the 
wall. "Off..." She heaved the Amazon off the ground by the arms. "Of..
." She brought her foot back. "ME!" she finished, punting the Chinese 
girl across the yard, scoring a direct hit. With a splash, Shampoo 
fell into the pond, emerging as a rather annoyed cat. "Nyao," Shampoo-
neko told Ranma, and charged her.
   Seeing a cat without a crescent moon, Ranma began to freak out. 
Luna sweated, and rushed to intercept the purple-white cat. With a 
soft thud, the two cats collided, and Luna knocked the Amazon cat 
across the yard. Landing on her feet, Luna prepared to strike again.
   The Senshi were all staring at the spectacle with wide eyes. "What 
the HELL was that all about?" Makoto wondered.
   Kasumi's voice was cheerful as she entered through the side door 
of the dojo and said, "Ranma-kun! I brought a kettle of hot water for 
when you get through, alright?"
   The wrestling cats made their way back to the dojo entrance, and 
managed to roll right into Ranma. The sight of Shampoo-neko caused 
Ranma to freak out, and she stumbled backwards, tripping over a 
slightly warped floorboard and sprawling onto her butt...
   ...right into the kettle of hot water, which tipped over on her 
head.
   "Oh SHIT," she, now he, groaned. The Senshi and Artemis collapsed. 


   The four Sailor Senshi stared in shock at the black-haired boy 
sprawled on the dojo floor, dripping with hot water, with a small, 
quickly fading bruise where the kettle had struck him. The lavender 
cat was pawing at him and mewling curiously.
   Ami reached into her subspace pocket and withdrew her computer. 
Adjusting its scan mode, she silently scanned the young man, and 
blinked. "This...this can't be right..."
   "Wh...what the hell is going on here?" Makoto asked.
   Ami frowned as she completed a second scan. "This is...or was...
Ranko. The DNA scan reads the same, minus one X chromosome replaced 
with a Y chromosome. Energy output level is identical, the Ginzuishou 
is still harmonizing with him. Only the gender changed..."
   Luna sighed. "Girls, it's time you knew the truth about our new 
member."
   "With the emphasis on 'member'," Makoto commented, earning a 
snicker from Minako, a scowl from Rei, a blush from Ami, and 
sweatdrops from the three Mau present. Kasumi had long since vanished.

   However, Shampoo was still hanging around. Luna noticed her. "You 
there...Shampoo..."
   Shampoo turned, and hissed at the black cat.
   "I'm sorry, but your presence here is unacceptable. You'll have to 
leave."
   Shampoo meowed the cat equivalent of "go to hell" and lunged for 
Luna. Scowling, Luna closed her eyes. The crescent moon on her 
forehead flared brightly, becoming visible to the other cat for the 
first time. Shampoo skidded to a halt and blinked. "Meow?"
   A beam of light shot from Luna's crescent. Unlike other such beams 
she'd used in the past, this one was a weapon, which Shampoo quickly 
discovered as she was blasted out of the dojo and halfway across the 
compound. Pausing only to unleash one final invective in cat language,
 she leapt over the surrounding wall.
   Luna sank down to the floor, panting. "Whew...I haven't done that 
in a very long time," she commented.
   "What *was* that, Luna?" Minako asked.
   "It's our weapon," Artemis answered as the other cat caught her 
breath. "None of us have had to do that for a very long time, not 
since the Fil were wiped out. Luna was one of our strongest and best 
sharpshooters."
   Everyone still looked confused. Charon explained. "It's a mental 
energy beam. As you've observed, all Mau, as well as the Fil, possess 
great mental and magical power. It's one of the reasons we were so 
useful to the Moon Kingdom, aside from our long lifespans and our 
great skill with knowledge...the Mau, unlike the Fil, are philosphers 
and keepers of lore above all else.
   "However, when the civil war broke out, we were forced to develop 
the more destructive aspects of our power. Luna, Artemis, and myself 
were all generals of our nation's army. Luna here had the strongest 
mental energy attack of everyone in our army. She also had the best 
aim."
   "Nice...to see...I've still got it, too..." Luna panted out. 
Finally, she dragged herself to her paws, and turned to face the 
Sailor Senshi. "As I was saying, you deserve an explanation about 
Shin Sailormoon."
   Artemis glared at Luna. "You knew something, and haven't told me?
"
   Luna ignored him. "As you may have figured out, his real name is 
not Ranko. It's Ranma. And, yes, Ranma *is* male."
   "We can look at him and tell that," Rei snapped.
   "But he *was* a girl before," Ami said. "My computer confirmed 
that."
   Luna nodded. "Ranma here has been training in martial arts all his 
life. I saw into his mind when I was dealing with his fear of cats, 
and know everything about him. He's had a rather unusual life."
   "NNnnnnn....you can say that again," Ranma said, sitting up and 
rubbing his head. He looked around at the scowling Senshi sheepishly. 
"Uhhh...heh...sorry about this."
   "How could you have been a girl, and now a boy? What are you?" 
Makoto asked.
   Ranma sighed. "Like Luna just said, I'm Saotome Ranma, of the 
Saotome school of Anything Goes Martial Arts. I've been in training 
since I was very young.
   "My pop dragged me away from home at age six. I've been through a 
lot of very rough training. The thing with the cats is because of a 
stupid stunt Pop pulled right after we left home. He dug up some 
training manual for a "Cat Fist" technique..."
   "Nevermind that!" Rei snapped. "Tell us about the reason you were 
a girl!"
   "Okay okay, sheesh. 'Bout a year ago, Pop and me were in China. He 
dragged me to some training grounds that were out of the way and 
supposed to be great places, according to brochures he kept pickin' 
up. He found this one brochure for a place called 'Jyusenkyou'. 
   "Course, Pop don't read Chinese, or he'd a'known to stay away from 
that place. It ain't used because it's a valley full of cursed 
springs. See, for a couple thousand years, all kinda stuff's been 
drownin' in those pools, and anything that falls in a pool where 
somethin' drowned takes the form of whatever it was."
   "No way," Makoto said.
   Ranma nodded. "We kinda didn't listen to the Guide when he tried 
to warn us about it. Well, I knocked Pop into a spring and he came 
out as a giant panda. Then, when I was tryin' to figure out what the 
hell happened, he knocked me into another spring. Nyanniichuan."
   Ami blinked. "Spring where a girl drowned."
   Ranma nodded. "Right. Now when I get splashed with cold water, I 
turn into a girl. Hot water changes me back, as you saw."
   Rei frowned. "And you don't know how to cure it."
   Ranma sighed. "Every cure we've tried didn't work. I think I'm 
stuck with it." He looked up. "I didn't tell you straight out because 
I didn't think you guys would trust me if you knew the truth." 
Pulling the medallion from his shirt, he said, "But it don't change 
the fact that Princess Serenity asked me to fill in for her...and she 
knows about the curse. So, until she's back on her feet, I'm still 
Sailor Moon."
   Luna nodded. "He's right, girls. Besides which, we need him."
   Ami agreed. "Without Ranma, most of the city would have been 
destroyed by now. And the rest of us would be in the same shape as 
Usagi, if not worse."
   The others considered this, and nodded. "Okay, no problems with 
that," Makoto said.
   Rei looked uneasy, but nodded. "Yeah, I suppose it's okay. It's 
going to take some getting used to though."
   Minako nodded. "It's cool with me." Smiling at Ranma, she said, 
"Besides, he's pretty cute."
   Makoto grinned. "Yeah, he reminds me of..."
   The other three, as well as Luna and Artemis, shouted, "DON'T SAY 
IT!" Makoto flushed.
   Ranma sweated nervously. "Ah...girls? Please...trust me, it'd be 
best for everyone concerned if you stop those kinds of thoughts right 
there."
   Luna nodded. "He's right."
   Minako sighed. "I know, I know...it's not a good idea to have a 
relationship with a teammate and all that, right?"
   Ranma shook his head. "That ain't it. It's what would happen if 
any of my 'fiancees' got suspicious."
   "FIANCEES!?" Rei, Minako, and Makoto shouted.
   "Anou, Ranma-kun...that's illegal in Japan," Ami said.
   Ranma sighed. "Tell *them* that."
   Luna stepped in. "Ranma's attracted a number of suitors, through 
various means. However, none of them are his own fault."
   "How can he get engaged and it not be his fault?" Rei fumed.
   "Twice by my Pop...well, more than that, really, but we chased off 
all but two of them," Ranma said, "then there's Shampoo...the girl 
you saw turn into a cat. She's a Chinese Amazon. Her village has a 
crazy law that if an outsider male beats an Amazon in combat, she has 
to marry him. I accidentally beat Shampoo, and she decided I'm her 
husband now.
   "Then there's Kodachi, who I'm not engaged to, but who is obsessed 
with me..." Ranma paused, and frowned. "Let's...let's just not get 
into it."
   The Senshi shrugged. Luna continued to discuss the Fil with them 
for a little while, then the four visiting Senshi returned to Juuban, 
while Ranma and Charon talked quietly in the dojo for a while.

   Apollo furiously paced the council chamber. "Dammit!" he snarled. 
"Blasted Sailor Senshi! Cursed Mau! Why does this have to be so 
difficult?"
   "Patience, Apollo," spoke a calm, quiet voice from the shadowed 
end of the chamber. "I felt the power these Senshi now weild. It will 
be difficult to eliminate them."
   Apollo muttered, "You don't know the worst of it."
   "Oh? And what is that?"
   "Their leader...she's...she's one of *them*."
   "Them? I don't know what you're referring to."
   Apollo stopped his pacing. "There are two races of beings which 
the Fil cannot stand. One is the Mau, those who drove us from our 
homeworld. The other, we encountered when we emerged from cryostasis 
sixteen centuries ago. When they discovered us, they managed to 
destroy over half of us before we could escape." He sighed. "If the 
new Sailormoon is one of them, this could be more trouble than we 
bargained for."
   "And who exactly are these beings?"
   "I'll have my aide prepare the data on them for you, Lord Adonais.
" With a respectful bow, Apollo left the chamber.
   Sitting in the shadows, Adonais considered this new information. 
He was not one of the Fil, and had only recently discovered their 
existence as a small group of them attempted to return to their 
homeworld. He had a score to settle with the Mau as well...especially 
two particular Mau who he had learned were still alive, and on Earth. 

   He also had a score to settle with the Sailor Senshi. A very, very 
big score.
   The chamber's lights played dimly across Adonais's face as he 
stroked the slight growth of golden beard on his chin. His jade-hued 
eyes gleamed in the soft lighting. "Most, most interesting indeed," 
he said, and leaned back into the shadows, chuckling evilly.


____
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"Zankoku na Tenshi no you ni, shounen yo shinwa ni nare....."

The Eternal Lost Lurker
squn29c@prodigy.com
EtLostLurker@hotmail.com
http://pages.prodigy.com/EtLostLurker