At 05:54 PM 09/07/97 +0100, Alpha Centauri wrote:

Kergma wrote:

On my holiday in the land of Kulture, hand guns and religious extremists,
all of whom drive on the wrong side of the road, I had the dubious
pleasure of being shown to one of America's many attempts to cultivate
'culture', in this case the imitation of my own country's eating
refinements.

You think that's scary, just wait until you see Americans try and
imitate Canadians. You either get Lumberjacks with bad french accents or
boy-scout Mounties. Brr!

Unfortunately, I had forgotten to bring over some *real* beer so my
planned 'XXXX.  Its Australian for beer, for when you can't spell Beer'
bit did not happen.  I'll send you some when I get back to Australia Greg.

FYI, 'Fosters' as Americans know it is not 'Fosters' as it should be.  For
one thing, its brewed in Canada.

Yes. You see, Canadian beer is actually a plot by Canada to mind control
the United States. 

Now why does that sound familiar?
[Belgaren scoots off to check his notes while grumbling about the hosers]

Everybody in the country is in on it, because
naturally we all know each other (When Canadian act annoyed when someone
asks if they know someone from the other side of Canada, its just that,
an act. We really DO all know each other). 

It's true.  See that guy all the way over there in BC?  
(A tiny speck on the horizon waves)
That's Alpha.  And a little closer to us is that guy to the south west,
Ranchan.  And then there's ... well you get the idea.

One of our early experiments
resulted in Dan Quayle becoming Vice-President (We wanted to see if we
could make the Americans accept a complete MORON as VP. Of course, then
we had to make sure nothing happened to Bush). Mike Tyson is an
unfortunate side-effect of one of our experiments, as is Michael
Jackson.

I deny the Michael Jackson allogation.  There's only so much you can do
with mind control.  And I question the Mike Tyson issue too.  Bitting 
a piece of someone's ear is usually considered impoooo...lite.  Oh ya, 
that's the _other_ conspiracy.  oops, I'm sorry. 

So you see, Canadian beer is actually a plot to take over the world!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Shhhh!  Stop it Alpha.  You're giving away the plot to Strage Brew II.

Belgaren