Here it is the last wait fic till I get some more free time. Hope ya
liked 'em.
The characters are Takahashi's.
The answer to your question is, only wizards can see death, just ask
Rincewind. If you don't get it, just chalk it up to an inside joke.
Matthew Trotter, if(project==595) kick(myass);
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A Long Period of Waiting of Several Months
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A collection of short stories
by
Matthew Trotter
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Recipe For Hate
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Ranma threw himself to the left catching his fall and using the
momentum to flip out of the way of Pop's sweep. It wasn't even close.
Pop had to be distracted to throw a move that sloppy. As he landed Ranma
jumped head long towards Pop. It was a move destined to fail. It would
however get Pop to react. Pop braced himself and looked ready to turn
the flying tackle into a throw. Not much forethought in that one. Ranma
flipped in midair to turn the tackle into a jump kick. Pop blocked it,
but barely. Ranma kicked off of Pop's block and flipped over to land
back in his ready position a few feet away. Pop didn't fall over, but it
was close.
"Ranma, that was sloppy boy!"
"SLOPPY?!?!?"
"You should be faster. A true martial artist wouldn't hesitate to
attack his father."
Sometimes Ranma wondered about Pop. He was obviously distracted by
something, and he was standing there telling him not to hesitate. Did
Pop really think he was hesitating, or was it all talk? It was hard to
say with Pop. One thing was for sure. Pop was really getting into
lecturing, it was probably because he didn't have to think to talk.
Well, he ought to have thought about it before he started talking about
not showing mercy in training.
"...ther thing, you must not think that a student of your low ability
could harm a teacher of my ..."
<POW>
"What's wrong, Pop, I thought a student of my low ability couldn't hurt
a teacher like you."
Pop rushed him. Ranma smiled inwardly, it was such a perfect sucker
trap...Pop just stopped mid rush and turned around.
"Ranma, did you hear that?"
There was a scream from the house, it sounded like Akane, before he
could move he had a feeling like someone pouring ice water down his
back. He didn't bother to wonder what it was, he could think about it
after he found out what was wrong with Akane.
"SAOTOMEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!"
It sounded like a mouth full of red hot razor blades. He looked at Pop,
"What did you do this time?!"
"Me? This has to be your fault, boy! Now take responsibility and go
meet your doom."
Ranma would have replied before he went out to see what the problem
was except the problem came to find him. The wall next to Pop exploded
in a spray of match stick shrapnel. The amazing thing was that Pop threw
himself backward at the last second and didn't even get hit by the wood,
let alone whatever force was driving it.
Through the hole in the wall he could see someone standing in the
yard. Who ever it was had their hand stretched out toward the hall. The
person let ...his, probably a guy...arm fall. He looked familiar. All
bony. Holding a weird looking book. The menacing thing was new...the
voice didn't seem to fit.
"Are you ready to die?"
There was something malevolent about the way...it was Gosunkugi! It
had to be. No body else had that pale, bony, 'hi, I'm with the Anorexia
convention' look.
"Afraid to speak? It doesn't matter. You have no choice."
"Gosunkugi, how's it going?"
Gosunkugi held up a hand and made a fist. He appeared to examine it
for a moment, "It goes like this," with that he jerked his fist backward<POW>
A force like a sledge hammer slammed into the back of Ranma's skull[1].
"I'm going to kill you Ranma. But first I'm going to destroy this
dojo and every living thing in it. You will suffer through the death of
everyone you love."
"Oh my."
Ranma looked toward the house, they were all there. Waiting for him
to save them. Akane looked like she was scared. Nabiki looked like
Gosunkugi would owe her alot of money soon. Soun looked like he might
cry, but then that wasn't necessarily because of Gosunkugi. Kasumi
looked surprised. She was just standing there holding a butcher knife
(she must have been preparing dinner) and looking like this was the
first time some lunatic showed up to try to kill him. Then again it was
the first time a lunatic showed up and said he was going to kill all of
them first...
"I believe I will begin with your father."
Pop sidestepped and part of the wall shattered. Gosunkugi made a
sweeping motion, Pop ducked and a section of the wall collapsed.
"See what a true martial artist can do, boy. All you need is to pay
attention to the task at hand. Think of this as..."
Gosunkugi made a slapping motion, and so did Pop's head. Gosunkugi
made one last strong slap to the left and pop spun around and fell over.
"Yeah, yeah, I know Pop, I martial artist can turn any experience into
training."
"Oh, did you think I was done?" Gosunkugi grinned sickly, "Now comes
the fun part."
--------------
[1] Fortunately, it hardly phased Ranma, as hammering was one thing he was
used to.
-------------------
Hikaro cold feel the power rising in him, he was anxious to taste the
soul energy of a human being...
"Oh, I think you've had more than enough fun. Play times over."
The power stopped. It felt like his heart did too. That voice
belonged to only one person. And he sounded pissed. Morphine.
Gosunkugi turned toward the pond. Morphine was rising out of it. He
wasn't wet...in fact he didn't even seem to be touching the surface...and
he was smiling. It was an evil smile. It made the grin he just gave
Ranma look like a kid at Christmas. It said everything Morphine hadn't.
It seemed to say, 'Hi. Your dead. Thanks for playing, you loose[1].
Your consolation prize is getting your ass kicked by a pro.' Hikaro
realized that there was a lot more to the evil sorcerer business than just
the magic. He was going to have to work on his people skills.
I thought that Morphine was a hedge mage.
He is.
Then how is he doing that?
Its a ... uum...trick...
How can I fight that?
Gather the power and blast him. He's weak. He'll never be able to
stop you!
"Would you like to bet?"
Hikaro felt the blood drain out of his face. He can read my mind.
"Yes, I can."
"Get out of my mind!!!!"
"Your a sorcerer, make me."
"Morphine!"
Morphine looked to his right. Tofu was standing in the gate. Hikaro
smiled, it wasn't a very good smile, but it did look sorta evil. This
was his chance.
"damn"
"Don't curse."
Hikaro felt the power flood into him. He held it until it felt like
he would burst. It was roaring so loud in his ears that he could no
longer hear what Tofu was saying to Morphine. It was time to erase
Morphine for good. He put up his arm as a focus to channel through.
" D I E ! "
----------------
[1] Just kidding, lose.
------------------------
Kasumi was aware of the knife. She knew, in some part of her brain,
that it had fallen out of her hand. It was just hard to think of that.
Ranma's friend was pointing at Mr. Morphine and screaming die at the top
of his lungs. That wasn't the distressing part. In fact, that seemed
fairly normal. It was the way the air between them seemed to warp. The
way the air around Mr. Morphine exploded in a ball of white rolling
flame. That seemed. . ...well, dangerous. Like it might kill him.
That wasn't how martial arts worked. You could Ki blast people half
way across the city, but it wasn't supposed to kill them. They were
supposed to get back up and come back in a few months. . . like Ranma's
other friend Ryoga.
The ball of fire finally collapsed back in on itself. Kasumi realized
she was holding her breath. If Mr. Morphine was dead, Dr. Tofu would be
crushed. They were such good friends. As the smoke and last of the fire
cleared Mr. Morphine was still there. Just like he had been before. In
fact, if it weren't for the molten slag, burnt foliage and steaming pond,
you wouldn't have known anything had happened. Mr. Morphine looked toward
Ranma's friend, and then back to Dr. Tofu.
"Like I said, he's obviously possessed."
"Yes, but I'm sure you can ask for the book back."
"Ooooh, look at that."
Mr. Morphine was pointing to the wall behind Ranma's friend. There
wasn't anything there that she could make out...
"Who is that?"
"He's the last thing all men know."
"You mean..."
"No, of course not. He's the Irritable Harvester, the Grim
Reaper's cousin. Of course that's who I mean."
"Is something bothering you, Morphine?"
"I get touchy when people dump a solar flare on me."
Ranma's friend appeared to be having a silent conversation with
himself. Then he smiled again. And pointed at Dr. Tofu. She wasn't
sure what happened next, just that Mr. Morphine had his hand on Ranma's
friend's throat.
--------------
Morphine was just standing there next to him. He could feel his hand
on his throat. He had a really strong grip. It was really hard to
swallow. Hikaro knew he had to look stupid standing there with his eyes
bugging out. There was no way anything human could have moved as fast as
Morphine. He felt Morphine put his other hand on the book.
"You know I could kill you right now. It wouldn't be hard. In
fact, it would probably be a lot of fun. But I won't. You know why?"
Morphine sounded like death. Every word was like a serrated blade
tearing flesh, every sentence was like barbed hooks dragged over the bare
skin of your back. Hikaro couldn't think of a good reason why he was
going to live...
"Oh there are two reasons. First, its much more fun to torture people
than to just kill them. That reason is the one you should fear. The
other reason is because Tofu wouldn't like it. That's the reason you
should remember. You almost eliminated a reason. I don't think you want
that. Hell is always hungry for another soul."
Hikaro wondered why a man who wanted to torture him to death would
worry about some one like Tofu. He could have easily told Tofu to shut
up...he could have just as easily made Tofu shut up.
"Look at him. He is all you should ever want to be. Do you think he
doesn't know magic? He could wipe the floor with you. But he won't.
That's the true power. I've seen him heal without even knowing what he's
doing. It takes nothing to break things. Entropy is easy. Try to make
something. That's impossible. But sometimes you can fix what gets
broken."
"Please teach me."
Morphine smiled. Hikaro prayed his bladder would hold out.
"No."
All that lecturing for a no?
"Now,"
Hikaro could feel all eyes on them.
"give me"
They were waiting for Morphine to do something really spectacular.
"back"
He was probably going to be spending some time as a frog or something
humiliating like that.
"my"
Here it came...He was going to say spell book and poof, its hello to
Kermit Gosunkugi.
"Cook Book."
Collectively, the dojo fell over...<CRASH>[1]
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[1] There are many theories about the end of the world. Some people
think it will go out with a bang, others think a crash. There are a
few people who even say it will go out with a bzzztbzzztkapow sound.[2]
The worlds personal theory had always been something like: Shit
happens, stay away from open sewers and maybe it won't hit you.
[2] But they're Vogons, and who cares what Vogons think?
---------------------
Kasumi watched as everyone fell over. She wasn't sure why they all
seemed to be suffering from sudden shock. It seemed perfectly reasonable
that Mr. Morphine would want back his cook book. It probably had some
really good recipes. She made a mental note to ask if she could borrow
it sometime. Mr. Morphine walked over to Dr. Tofu and said something she
couldn't hear. Dr. Tofu looked at her and then at Mr. Morphine. He said
something back, it sounded a little like he said something about an
emergency. She looked down. The knife was stuck in the floor. About a
foot in front of her. She remembered it falling out of her hand. It
probably would have landed on her foot. Strange...
---------------
Hikaro felt drained. The book was gone, and he felt like himself
again. Weak and warn out. But at least he was alive. Nabiki walked
over to him.
"Here's the bill."
"Bill?"
"For the damages to the hall."
Great. Broke, but alive. He noticed Ranma and his father
approaching...they looked pissed. Well, at least it couldn't get any
worse. Akane picked up a mallet and joined them.
---------------
THIS WAS INTOLERABLE!!! IT WAS NOT A TOY TO BE PLAYED WITH AND FORGOTEN!!!!
IT WAS A TOME OF STRANGE AND EVIL POWERS! IT WAS NOT A COOK BOOK!!! IT
COULD SUMMON THE HOST OF HELL OR...HEY THERES A RECIPE FOR CHICKEN WIngs
On Page 34564. Ooooo glazed. That sounded good. With Sourdough rolls.
Served with butter?! That sounded great! Wait a minute....It was
supposed to be a dread and evil book. It had once been the book of
conjuring for the dread lich king Gadieel. And a tome of demon lore for
Bronscrat the Wicked. And the Book of Rituals for...aw what the hell, it
was dying to see those chicken wings get done...