Double Life
A Ranma 1/2 fanfic
By Jonathan Lung
"Ranma 1/2" and all characters relating to that series are owned by Rumiko Takahashi and the series' publishers.
Author's forward: This is my second fanfic. This is basically a messed-up, Otaku fic. However, I believe this particular one has a few differences to the typical "Demigod Otaku solves everything and destroys all opposition" story, (although this trend is starting to change). First, the main character, James Wei, HAS NO UNBALANCING OTAKU POWERS! The only thing he got out of the whole deal was a command of the Japanese language, some Kenpo training, and maybe one chi-projection attack (I've not decided yet). Second, he frequently jumps back and forth between his world and a variant of the Ranma 1/2 Universe, carrying knowledge, items, and sometimes people with him. This variant reality is explained in the note at the end of the story. It will be there for those who don't really understand how it is different.
I've tried to insert as much culture as I know or possibly can. I do find it rather pathetic though, that even though I'm Chinese, I barely know anything about Asian culture.
For those who detest either a new character taking center stage or those who hate Ukyo, DON'T READ THIS!
I've always wondered what Ranma and Company would do in an American school, but since carting them over there would be implausible (IMHO), I just made it Ukyo, and possibly a couple others. I've also wondered what would happen if some normal (barely) people ever saw an anime character in the flesh.
Note: All names are in American standard, sorry. Only under certain occasions will Japanese (and Chinese) standard be used.
Chapter 1: Introduction
Thunder and lightning crashed outside. Each bolt resounded with a tremendous boom and crash, shaking the trees outside. For James Wei, it was the perfect type of weather. It seemed to reflect his current mood anyway. Sullen and dark, he quietly lay down on his bed, thinking about his day. It had started off pretty well, until they, referring to certain people in school started teasing him. He then started to think of how many puns you could think of for the name Wei.
Unfortunately, that was not the only thing that earned him such torture. If it were only that, he could have easily gotten them in serious trouble. After all, the last thing that his high school needed was a racial discrimination suit. Nah, it was his choice of hobby that got the most kick. Japanese comics and animation were the thing for Jim. Ever since his older brother brought home an old manga of Akira, he was hooked. If you looked around Jim's room, you could see he was rather...interested in it. Those anime fans who had such addiction were often referred to as _Otaku_. As much as he denied being one to his friends, he had to admit it was true.
Well, he thought, at least you don't write fanfics...
Jim slowly got up to look for something to eat. After several searches around the house, he decided to order a pizza. With his parents often gone at parties and his older brother away at collage, he pretty much fended for himself during most evenings. Just him, his anime and mangas, and several empty pizza boxes.
He picked up the phone and dialed for the pizza parlor. Of course, with the storm all out in force, it was obvious that it would take some time for the pizza to arrive. Thus, he popped a Ranma 1/2 video into his VCR. He started to dial when a tremendous thunderclap jostled him, causing him to accidentally press the 6 key three times. Being rather unaware of such subtle things, he continued to dial anyway.
In the meantime, a bolt of lightning struck the phone line, screwing with the signal that Jim sent out. At the same time, another bolt hit the power line underneath it, messing with his VCR. While these events would have led an over-extrapolating reader to conclude that Jim was sucked into the Ranma 1/2 universe, and gained the powers that every Otaku gets when such a thing happens, that was not so. (That sort of happens later)
However, something not unlike that occurred.
Jim heard a couple rings before someone picked up.
"Hello, Tendo residence, Kasumi speaking."
"Uh-huh, and I'm Ryoga Hibiki," Jim said sarcastically, remembering that the pizza place knew about him and possessed Caller ID.
"Why Ryoga, do you have a cold? You sound a little different," the receiver asked.
In the background, Jim could have sworn he heard a faint "Ranma no baka!"
"No! Wait! I was just kidding, I must have the wrong number...sorry," Jim hastily replied, abruptly hanging up.
"Whoa, that was strange..." Jim said, losing his appetite. He had also lost his mood for anime for the rest of the evening, dumbfounded at the call that had just taken place.
Chapter 2: School Blues
Jim woke up rather startled. He just had one of the funkiest dreams in his life, but he barely remembered it. So, he shrugged it off and got ready for school, still wondering about the phone call the night before.
Getting ready for school consisted of a quick shower, general maintenance of his head region ( hair, mouth, face), and grabbing a half-frozen Pop Tart. It also consisted of bringing a comic from his collection. This time it was a Ranma 1/2 comic, as it was Wednesday and it was the day for that series.
Most of the early half of the day was either annoying, boring, or downright pitiful. He bombed a math test, botched a History report, and got his comic soaked in water. He was nearly comatose from Japanese when the bell rang, signaling lunchtime. As usual, he bought his toxic landfill of a lunch and sat down with his friends. Sometimes he wondered if he was the weird one of the group. Then he talked for a few minutes and decided that he wasn't.
"So, what did you do last night? More anime?" Mike asked, sitting across from Jim.
"Actually, no," Jim responded.
"Finally found out that that stuff is scrubby, huh?" Jack said, sitting to the left of Jim.
"Shut up!" Jim said, slapping his friend upside the head.
"Heh-heh, diesel, diesel!!!" Will said, who was to the right of Jim. "Diesel" was Will's expression for something he thought was cool.
"Anyway..." Jim started, "I had one of the most whacked-out misdials in the history of the world last night. Either that, or it was one of the most messed-up practical jokes of all."
"Really? What happened, dialed a 976 number instead of the pizza place?" Mike said jokingly.
"No, but I was calling for pizza. Instead, I get the 'Tendo' residence, complete with Kasumi."
The group gave him a funny, 'he's-lost-it' stare.
"I'm serious! That's what I got!" Jim yelled. Since they were in the lunchroom, no one cared if he yelled.
"I think you need help, something along the lines of 'Anime Anonymous.'" Jack said.
"I think so too," Will said.
"You're definitely over the edge here, Jim," Mike said.
"Ugh, never mind, it was probably just the pizza guys playing me for a fool," Jim resigned.
"There you go," Mike concurred.
The rest of lunch went uneventful, except for sporadic conversation about American comics. Today's rumor was that Marvel was going to get bought up by DC, then how DC will eventually get bought up by Image after that.
* * *
By the time Jim got home, he was pissed again. Those certain parties mentioned before shook him down, all the while taunting him with such beauties as "hey, you goin' my WAY?" and "hey Ani-freak, gimmie your loot." Since Jim couldn't, shall we say, fight for shit, he gave them some of his money, with the rest of it being hidden. Besides, the assholes he faced were reputed to be freaking Neo-Nazis. The last thing he needed was a group of skinheads knocking on his front door.
"Why don't you fight back?" Jack had said many times before.
"'Cause I can't. Plus the fact that their buddies might torch my house?" was the typical reply Jim gave.
So, all Jim wanted to do was finish his work and watch the Ranma tape he did not watch before. He finished his work and was about to turn on the VCR when it shocked him with static.
While Jim was away at school, several weird things happened to his VCR. First, the lightning bolt from the night before had charged both the VCR and the tape inside it. While normally an electric charge would disrupt the magnetic recording of the tape, it did not. Instead it altered its properties. Although the equations necessary to describe this change are unknown to modern science, it featured two modular numbers, or numbers that consistently appeared within the equations.
These numbers were 10 and 42.
So when Jim touched the VCR, not only did he receive an electric shock, he also received a charge of 10-and-42 particles.
But, knowing the crudeness of the human mind, Jim completely ignored the latter particles and instead concentrated on the appropriate response for the former.
"Ouch!" Jim yelped, and resumed turning on the VCR.
After Jim finished watching the Viz-dubbed video of "Desperately Seeking Shampoo," he promptly fell asleep.
Chapter 3: First Jump
Jim woke up very groggily, feeling as though he were sleeping on the ground. In fact, he was. His eyes snapped open, revealing a most disturbing sight to him.
He was in a large, open room, with a series of people staring at him.
"Hello, I'm Akane Tendo, who are you?" the one closest to him said.
Jim immediately fell asleep again. Apparently, he was not ready to get up yet. Maybe a few more minutes.
He got up again, expecting to see his room and NOT Akane Tendo. He was wrong.
"Hello again," she said.
"Oh, hello," Jim said, after 3 minutes of absolute silence.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
"Um, yeah sure, why not?"
It was then that Jim realized he was speaking Japanese, something he didn't normally do.
"Then you could tell us your name then," said an elder behind Akane, this one with long hair and a moustache.
"James Wei, sir. Could you explain to me how I arrived here?"
"Well, Kasumi," the man said, pointing to a young woman, "found you outside in the rain, asleep."
"Rain?" Jim said, then looked down to see himself completely soaked through. "Oh."
"So, why are you here?" the man asked.
Thoughts raced through Jim's mind at the speed of, well, thought. Something...something...something...something...ah-hah!
"I am here to study at the Tendo School of Anything-Goes Martial Arts and attend the local high school! <Yeah, that's it...a glutton for trouble>"
"Well, then you are welcome to stay here, providing you can pay for your training."
"Ermmm..." Jim babbled, realizing he had no money on him. "I can be a practice dummy," Jim finally said. "I'll probably find some money later as well."
"Good!" the man said, and bowed deeply. "I will be your sensei. I am Soun Tendo."
Jim bowed as best he could, dripping water in the process.
"Well, school starts in 30 minutes, so you'd better get going," Mr. Tendo said.
"School!?"
"Yes, you said you were going to attend the local school, correct?"
"Oh, yeah, right."
"You'll be going with me and Ranma," Akane said.
"R-Ranma?" Jim gulped.
"You know him?"
"Well, I've heard of him..."
"Maybe he can give you something to wear."
"Why would I need..." Jim started, then remembered that he was still soaking wet. "Oh yeah."
* * *
I can't believe it! Jim thought as he raced to Furinkan High with Akane and Ranma. This is like all of those stupid Otaku self-insertion fics, only I don't have any powers. This has to be a dream... He then put a hand to the red Chinese shirt he was wearing and realized that this was about as real as it got. Hell, Ranma gave this to me in person!
The trio ran on until they reached the main courtyard. This was when Jim, being the oblivious numbskull that he was, darted past Ranma and Akane. He thought he was making good time when he heard HIM...
"Saotome!!! Your time has come!!!" Kuno yelled, charging at Jim, bokken upraised.
"But I'm not..." Jim started, but then realized that he WAS wearing Ranma's shirt. In this case, that piece of cloth was like a big bullseye strapped on him.
Thus, Jim did the one move that he knew. Just as Kuno was about to reach him, Jim dived forward, tumbling Kuno over. Kuno lay flat on his back, growling.
"You will stand your ground <ack!>" Kuno said just as he was stepped on by both Ranma and Akane.
The trio entered the school, with one minute to spare.
* * *
School was uneventful. With every single class that Jim went to, he realized that they were basically identical to his normal school. The only notable exception was English class, which replaced his Japanese class. This left Jim wondering how he could speak Japanese AND English, even though he barely spoke the former. That was changed as soon as he entered this new reality. Usually, he thought, in all those fanfics, the guy-in-question gained the ability to speak Japanese, but lost all ability to speak English. Hmm...
* * *
Jim started his first Kenpo lesson after school. He basically got splattered first by Mr. Tendo, then by Ranma, then by Akane. Afterwards, the process started again, only faster. By the time it was over, he learned to fall on the ground without getting hurt so much, and how to punch effectively (after being punched and thrown repetitively). Jim fell asleep on his futon with the clothes Ranma lent him, being in too much pain after getting beaten up, dressing, eating, then getting beaten up again. This last thrashing occurred after he tried to make a grab for the last eggroll during dinner. Ranma, Akane, and Genma all pummeled him senseless over it.
Chapter 4: Verbatim
Jim woke up slowly, rolling off his bed. Since he expected to be in a futon, he expected to fall about 2 inches. Unfortunately for him, he was in his bed, a good foot-and-a-half off the ground. He rubbed his head as he realized he was back in his own room.
"Yes!!! It was a dream!" he yelled, going off to his bathroom to get ready for school. This action netted him incredible amounts of pain as his body spazzed out in several places. His mind also freaked as he saw himself in the mirror wearing a red Chinese shirt.
"Oh, SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!" Jim yelled as he plopped on the bathroom tile. Luckily for him, his parents were DEEP sleepers.
Okay, think, he thought. He looked at the clock/calendar, it was Thursday, which meant that he did not lose a day while staying with the Tendos. This meant that either he had jumped into the Ranmaverse, or he was completely nuts and got the outfit while sleepwalking. Jim, being the Otaku that he was, decided on the former and got ready for school, still amazed at the thought.
* * *
School seemed to be a blur for Jim. Rather dazed, he still wore the stuff that Ranma had given him. Each class seemed pointless, because by some coincidence, he learned the same thing in each class during his day at Furinkan.. Lunch came soon enough, after he astounded his Japanese teacher with his sudden command of that language. Apparently, whatever gave him that ability carried over to his reality.
"So, did ya misdial again and get the Tendos?" Jack asked sarcastically.
"No...what would make you say something like that?" Jim said cautiously.
"Sorry, just kidding man. You look a little tense." Jack said.
"Bad night."
"Hey, Jim. Where did you get that weird shirt? Mike asked.
"I dunno, found it in the closet," he said warily.
"Looks diesel on ya," Will said.
"Yeah, sure," Jim said, growing increasingly cynical.
"Hey, doesn't that shirt look familiar to you guys?" Mike said.
"Yeah, it does..." Jack agreed.
"Well, I've not a single clue as to what you guys are hinting at..." Jim said, realizing that they would catch on sooner or later.
"Ranma 1/2!" the three exclaimed in unison.
"Oh god..." Jim said, tucking his head under his arms, ready for the various jokes that would soon ensue. They did, and he was none too happy about it.
"Could you please...SHUT UP!!!" Jim yelled at his friends, after about a dozen jokes, "I am not feeling so good right now and I am getting PISSED!!!"
"What are you goin' to do, amaguriken us? HAHAHAHA!!!"
Jim sighed, got up slowly, and walked away. Gawd, he thought, if they only knew.
* * *
Jim once again fell asleep, thinking that his jump was a one time thing. And once again he was wrong. He woke up to the sound of yelling.
"HURRY UP STUPID OR YOU'RE GONNA BE LATE!!!" Akane yelled.
"Dear God, no..." Jim whispered in English.
He got up, and went though the motions of the previous day. You know, school, Kuno-thrashing on Ranma and Akane's part, getting thrashed (AKA practice), and dinner (which inevitably led to more pain)
* * *
Jim walked back to the Tendo dojo, his stomach grumbling. Due to an unfortunate food fight at school, he did not manage to eat lunch. On his way back, he stopped by a restaurant.
"Hmm...Ucchans..." Jim wondered. Being the pseudo-Otaku that he was, he calmly walked in, knowing full well who owned the place and what was served there. Oh, did I mention that Jim was back in one of Ranma's shirts? Yeah, he got soaked again when he got booted into the carp pond during a sparring match between Ranma and Genma.
"Hi, Ran-cha...oh, sorry, I thought you were someone else," Ukyo Kounji said, approaching Jim.
"Oh, the shirt, actually, Ranma lent me this," Jim replied, explaining his garment
"Well anyway, I'm Ukyo, and welcome to Ucchans."
"Thank you, I'm James Wei, but please, call me Jim."
"What would you like?"
"Well...I guess the okonomiyaki sounds pretty good about now."
"Good choice, Jim," Ukyo said, walking to the kitchen, pausing only briefly to boot a curious-looking plant out of the restaurant.
"Stay out, Tsubasa!" Ukyo yelled after she heard a faint crash.
Jim chuckled a little at that exchange, as he had when he saw scenes similar to it on video.
After about 6 minutes, Ukyo came out with a sizzling okonomiyaki.
"Mmm..." Jim said, savoring the odor. Even though he never had it before, excessive contact with Ranma 1/2 made him like it. He finished it in about 1 minute.
Afterwards, Ukyo and Jim chatted, as he was the only customer at the moment.
"So, you're training with the Tendos?" Ukyo asked.
"Yeah, it's okay I guess," Jim said, all of a sudden feeling every bruise and bump that was on him. He flinched visibly and spazzed of a fraction of a second, long enough for Ukyo to notice.
"Your really not suited for it, I guess," Ukyo said.
"Probably not, but it's worth it," Jim said, getting up. "I'd best be going, more 'training' awaits me."
"Could you give this to Ran-chan for me?" Ukyo asked, holding a take-out bag.
"Sure."
When Jim got back to the Dojo, Ranma and Akane were arguing as usual. This time seemed to be about the food fight.
"You didn't have to use my lunch, Ranma!" Akane bawled, mallet at ready.
"But did you see what it did!? It took out half the lunchroom! It was better as a weapon than as food!"
"Jerk!" Akane yelled, placing her mallet neatly into Ranma's skull.
"Um, excuse me you two."
"Oh, hi Jim." Akane said, removing her hammer from the indentation it made in her fiance.
"I passed by Ucchans today, Ukyo wanted me to give this to you, Ranma," Jim said, placing the bag next to Ranma's half-caved head.
"Ukyo!!! Argh!!!" Akane exclaimed as she swung again at Ranma, knocking him across the room.
"I'm going upstairs now..." Jim said, once again amazed at the sudden violence. It was one thing to see it in the manga or on video, but seeing every day in the flesh was a little disconcerting for him.
* * *
A whole month went like this, with Jim jumping back and forth between universes. At first it was extremely disorienting. He often mixed up names and places, much to the discontent to his two sets of friends (his friends in the real world and Ranma and Co.) Soon, his real world friends were seeking mental help for him, to his horror of course. Days spent in the Ranmaverse were actually starting to be more enjoyable than those in the real world. He was really starting to enjoy his now daily chats with Ukyo, much to his surprise. Dammit! He thought, I need proof of this place. He slammed his fist against the dojo wall, then realized what he needed.
* * *
It had taken several days to get what he needed, and vast amounts of pain. By the time it was over, he managed to get the four items he was looking for.
[FLASHBACK <in script>}
Jim <in best Ranma-chan impression>: Hey Kuno baby! <hiding around corner>
Kuno: Oh, my Osage no Onna!!! I come! <goes around corner>
<CRACK!>
Jim <wielding blackjack>: Sorry, but you have something I need. <takes bokken>
***
Jim: Hey, Ukyo?
Ukyo: Yes, Jim?
Jim: Do you think I could borrow a spatula?
Ukyo: Sure, I have plenty of them.
Jim: Thanks, this means a great deal to me.
***
Jim <with camera>: Hey Ranma, Akane, wanna get a picture?
Ranma and Akane: No!...tomboy...hentai...
Jim:<sigh>
<30 minutes of pleading and the rest of the gang later>
Jim: Smile! <setting timer>
<click>
[END FLASHBACK]
Jim placed all of his stuff into a small bag and fell asleep with it.
Chapter 5: The Truth Revealed, I Guess
Jim woke up with a start. The first thing he realized was that he was back in this room again.
The second thing was that he was wearing a training gi. The third thing was that he still had his bag, just as Phoenix had said it would be.
"Well, better get changed," he mumbled. Today was the day to prove to his friends that he was not nuts.
He got the small bag from his bed and sifted through it.
"Good, everything's still in here."
Jim walked out of his house, humming to himself.
* * *
"So let me get this straight," Mike started. "Every time you go to sleep, you 'jump' into the Ranma universe."
"And every time you sleep there, you jump back here?" Will said.
"Yep." Jim said, going to his backyard. Mike, Jack, and Will followed.
"You, REALLY need help." Jack said. "As a favor to you, we will take all of your mangas and anime off your hands." Jack gave a rather stupid grin after that.
"Shut up, I'm serious," Jim replied, slapping Jack upside the head.
The group went inside and marched up into Jim's room. The once cluttered room was cleaner now, with all the mangas off the floor and on the shelves. Jim picked up a small bag and opened it. From it he produced an red Chinese shirt, a small, yet familiar spatula, and a snapped bokken. He also produced picture of him posing with Ranma and Akane, along with much of the crew behind them, trying to get in the picture.
"Well?" Jim asked
"Okay..." Jack said.
"Yikes..." Mike said.
"Diesel..." Will said.
"Believe me?" Jim said.
"Yeah...sure...uh-huh," the trio sputtered.
"Good. Remember, this is a secret, 'kay?"
"Okay," the trio said in unison.
They seemed to take it well.
Chapter 6: A Visitor From The Other Side
James Wei whistled as he entered Ucchans. He felt real happy for the first time in a while. Ukyo seemed to be the only one that he could talk to without any annoyance. When around his friends, they wanted stories about the Ranmaverse. When around Ranma and Akane, they would fight so much that the subject of the conversation was lost immediately.
He once again wore a red Chinese shirt. In fact, he had worn it so much Ranma said to keep it.
"Doesn't really matter," he had said.
"Hi Jim-chan!" Ukyo exclaimed, coming over to him.
This was new, he thought, I never heard her say "Jim-chan" before. Ah, well.
"So, what's new?" Ukyo asked.
"Well, nothing much, just more training, more Kuno-grinding, oh, and Akane bashed Ranma's head in again," Jim said, as nonchalantly as possible.
"Oh," Ukyo said, suddenly crestfallen at the mention of Ranma and Akane.
"Oops," Jim said, "sorry."
"It's okay. I just don't see how Ranma can stand that tomboy..."
"Hey! Akane's still a friend of mine ya know?" Jim said, irritated. Even though he knew that it would ALWAYS be like this, he didn't have to hear it all the time.
"I'm sorry, I guess I overdo it sometimes."
"It's okay."
* * *
Just outside of Ucchans, a figure in a leotard watched the two figures talk. Even though she couldn't make out their faces, she knew that the one with the large spatula was that hussy, Ukyo. The other in the red shirt HAD to be Ranma.
Kodachi Kuno laughed to herself, a low, maniacal rumbling originating from her diaphragm. The plan was simple, yet perfect. She would leap down, spray them with the water gun filled with sleeping formula, and carry Ranma off to the Kuno mansion.
Kodachi leapt down and sprayed the two figures within the span of a few milliseconds. Neither seemed to react in time, which was odd for Ranma and Ukyo. Kodachi's smile of triumph dissolved into a scowl as she turned over the male.
"Damn!" she said when she found out that it was not Ranma, but someone else.
She decided to leave the two alone, who were sprawled on top of one another. No skin off her nose, she thought.
* * *
Jim woke up suddenly, sitting upright in his bed. Back here?! he thought, I didn't go to sleep yet though. He then remembered the girl in the leotard spraying him and Ukyo, then darkness. Oh yeah. Just as he got out of bed he realized there was someone else in there as well.
"Yipe!" Jim squealed rather pathetically, pulling off the covers. And there she was.
Ukyo Kuonji lay there on Jim's bed, dozing lightly. She wore the same things that she had when they were talking earlier. This included the giant spatula on her back and the bandolier of smaller spatulas strapped on her.
How is that possible? he thought. He remembered how when he fell asleep with his bag in one world, he woke up with it in the other.
Jim then remembered Ukyo falling on him when they were hit by the sleeping formula.
"Oh...shit," was all he could think of to say.
It was then that Ukyo woke up.
"Wah...huh...where am I?" she mumbled.
"Um...in my room?" Jim said, as innocently as possible. He did NOT want to get on Ukyo's bad side. Having his face flattened two-dimensionally by a large weapon was not on his agenda.
"WHAT??!!!!" she yelled, and sprang out of the bed, battle-spatula ready to plaster Jim. "HENTAI!!!"
"No-wait-I-can-explain!" Jim sputtered, mere centimeters from being flattened into human okonomiyaki.
"You have 2 minutes," she said, her tone turning Jim's blood ice cold.
"Okay, it goes like this..." he started, and within 1minute, 59 seconds, explained everything he thought he could. Just as soon as he finished, he dropped back onto his bed, out of breath.
"So you're saying we're in another universe?" Ukyo said, putting the spatula on the bed next to Jim.
"Yes."
"And that...wait. I just realized this but, I'm speaking English now!" Ukyo said, rather surprised.
"I think that's a side effect of the jump. Jumping gave me the ability to speak Japanese."
"Cool."
"Well, anyway, until we fall asleep again, you're stuck here for the day."
"So what am I supposed to do, just twiddle my thumbs until tonight?"
"I dunno, you can come to school with me, I guess."
"Why not, but how am I going to get in?" Ukyo asked.
"That's easy. Many students bring people from out of town for a visit. What's the difference if the person's from another universe?" Jim said, stretching. "Well, I'd better get ready. Oh, you'd better change into something else, Ukyo."
"Why?"
"Well, you do kinda smell like okonomiyaki..."
"Shut up!" she said, smacking Jim upside the head.
"Ow, anyway, you should leave the spatulas here also. The teachers at my school are VERY paranoid of anything remotely sharp."
"Okay, but I am bringing one of them with me."
"Sounds okay," he said, figuring it would be relatively easy to hide it.
Thus the day started for Jim with one other coming to school with him. He got out a change of clothes and went into the bathroom to change and take a shower. After he got out, he snuck Ukyo in. She came out wearing a pair of trousers she borrowed from Jim and the shirt he was wearing earlier.
"You look very nice." Jim whispered.
"Thank you. So now what?"
"Well, my parents should be up in about five minutes, so we'd better hurry."
"Son?" Jim heard his dad say.
"Um, yes dad?"
"Are you talking to yourself or something?"
"Ah, no dad, you're just dreaming."
"Oh, okay," Jim heard his dad mumble.
"Great, they're already up. Come with me."
Jim grabbed his schoolbag and calmly walked out of the back door, with Ukyo in close proximity.
* * *
Tien Wei groggily trudged himself to his son's room. He decided to have a talk with him before school. Lately, young Jim had been acting rather strangely. He kept strange hours, and his behavior had become more erratic. His P.E. teacher had recently been complaining of his performance. She had said that Jim shirked all activities, stating, "I gave at the dojo, go away."
Tien wondered about that comment. Was his son taking Martial Arts without permission? As an expert in martial arts, he often tried to teach his son how to fight. Every single time he refused, citing some ridiculous excuse. Now he was learning on his own? It really didn't add up.
"Son, I need to speak with..." Tien started, but then realized that Jim's room was empty.
* * *
"Wu Chen?" Chen Wei heard her husband say.
"What is it, wouda arien?"
"Where do you think our son could have gotten something like this?"
Tien held up a large object. The staff of it was long, with a ring pommel and a pair of grips at the end. The top ended with a large flat surface.
It looked like a giant spatula.
"How am I supposed to know? Could it be some kind of martial arts weapon?" Chen asked.
"I have never seen anything like this. Even in my years of training, I've never even heard of it. For all I know it could be used to make pizza or those Japanese pancakes, okono-something-or-another."
"I think we should stay home today. Have a little chat with Jim."
"I agree."
* * *
Jim and Ukyo walked the way to school. During that time, Jim spoke about school in general, so that it wouldn't be quite a shock for Ukyo. Even though she DID attend Furinkan High, almost any American public school would screw with anyone's senses.
"So what happens if we're late?" Ukyo asked, rummaging through a bag that Jim gave her to keep stuff in.
"Well, they just vent a little steam and mark it on their attendance list."
"No buckets of water?"
"They might have done that, but either a) they were afraid of what students might do with the water, or b) they probably couldn't afford the buckets."
Ukyo chuckled a bit at the last remark.
The two entered the school and went to the main office.
"I'd like to enter a visitor?" Jim asked the secretary.
"Your name, please? Surname first, then personal. " the secretary said to Ukyo.
"Kuonji, Ukyo" she said.
"Good, you're all clear," the secretary said, typing away into his terminal.
"Well, that wasn't so hard," Jim said as the two left the office.
* * *
Jim and Ukyo entered the Japanese class and found a pair of seats in the back. When class began, the teacher started to write on the board various kanji and kana symbols. Normally, Jim would have been copying them down, but since his first jump, he understood all of them.
"Shouldn't you be concentrating?" Ukyo whispered.
"Nah, thanks to you guys, I don't need it anymore. Continual exposure and the effects of the jump did something to me. Now I can read and write kanji and kana, I think. Haven't really tried it yet."
"That's good, so now this class is useless to you."
"Basically."
"Jim!" the teacher suddenly said, "since you were paying SO much attention, perhaps you could tell us what this means." He pointed to a series of symbols.
"Sure, <Japanese>" (that was supposed to be Japanese, but I don't know any) "It means, 'you should pay attention to your teachers more, they actually know stuff.'"
"Very good, hmm, it seems we have someone new here," the teacher said, glancing towards Ukyo. "Perhaps you would like to tell us a little about yourself?"
"Remember, say nothing about Ranma or Akane," Jim whispered as Ukyo got up to the front of the class.
"Konnichi-wa, Kuonji Ukyo desu," she started, bowing slightly as well. "Well, I'm from Japan, I attend high school in Tokyo. During after-school hours, I run a restaurant."
"Hey, that's the same name of a character from...<oof!>" a student began, but was cut off by a quick elbow by Jim.
Ukyo finished the brief summary of her life, minus Ranma and Co. She appeared to impress the group, although there were occasional comments about her extremely long hair and rather strange clothing.
"So, how was I?" Ukyo asked as she sat down.
"Just great, although he," Jim said, pointing to the wheezing kid next to him, "got a little too annoying."
"What did he do?"
"Um, he um...drummed his fingers on the desk a lot."
"Oh."
