David Row wrote:
It will involve the `Ah! My Goddess' universe, and a few others.. :-)
Although its rather darker than the usual fic's set in AMS - no
fluffy bunnies here, unless they are roadkill!!
(er, the revengefic thing isn't still running, is it...???)
Jim: "Hey Skuld-sama, here's another AMG fanfic."
Skuld-sama: "Hah! I'm ready. Here's your Pringles."
Jim: "Arigato!"
Skuld-sama: (makes a face) "and here's your Jolt(tm)...ugh"
Jim: (takes bottle from Skuld-sama, opens it and takes a BIG swig)
"Ahhhh, Necter of the Gods."
Skuld-sama: "Not in MY firmament!" (raids freezer) "Cheap! Only
three pints of Haggen-Daz this time!"
Jim: "It's called Christmas Presents, and rent. Anyway, enough
preliminary stuff. (both sit in surplus office chairs and roll them
close to Jim's computer) This evening's fic chapters come from the UK,
specifically..."
David Row
(Ecchi, and still scratching...)
davidrow.ryoohki@pop3.hiway.co.uk
Skuld-sama: (groans) "What is it with you guys and puns?"
Oh, and for the misspelling experts, I'm British, and this is not spelt
in American, OK? :-)>
************************************************************************
The Ragnarok Agenda
Part 1 - Prequel, or Don't worry, it's only a dream...
It was a dark and stormy night...
Skuld-sama and Jim together: "GROOOOAAANNN"
<Snip>
Scene :
A bedroom. In the middle of it, a man sleeps in a double bed...
Not very well, judging by the way he keeps tossing and turning, and the
disheveled state of the bedclothes gripped tightly in his clenched
fists. The only sounds are the muffled humming of a clock and the
occasional low moan coming from the body in the bed.
It is dark, and the only illumination comes from the twisting shadows
thrown onto the curtains by the streetlight outside, a faint orange
flickering...
Jim: "I like the way he says this."
A city. Well, an area that probably was once a city, before something
happenned to it...
Clouds roil turgid and black above a landscape that consists mainly of
destroyed buildings, their skeletal remains poking up above the general
devastation like random rotting teeth in steel and concrete, lit badly
by the flickering glows of a few fires.
Nothing moves, and the air has a dead feel to it. The only sound the
thin whistle of a bitingly cold wind.
Underfoot, the ground occasionally trembles, as if it would do more but
is afraid to draw too much attention to itself...
Skuld-sama: "What is it with you fanfic people and massive destruction?
First YOU have the friend you invented for me vaporize Tokyo Bay, then
Eimii makes Ryouga-kami responsible for the Tunguska blast, now this!
What is it that associates us with vast destruction in your minds?!"
(shovels a heaping spoon of Ice Cream in her mouth)
Jim: "Well, he has put Ragnarok in the fanfic title, and I guess that
could be one of your answers, Norse deities remind people of the
Ragnarok
legend. And remember, so far it's only a dream."
<snip>
There is one - person - however, who seems to be fine. Standing
arrogant atop a mound of rubble, his stance one of arrogant possession,
monarch of this domain of devastation.
Oh my... I wonder what happened here? And what IS that man doing? Don't
I get to see all the fight first? How boring. I wonder what those
creatures are supposed to be? I wish that wind would stop that bloody
howling, it sounds like a wolf with a toothache...
And some of those bodies look - familiar? I...can't place them...Who
do I know who's a dark-skinned girl with long silver hair...
Skuld-sama: "Who's the bad guy? Why'd he trash Urd?"
Jim: "Don't know."
<snip>
One of the female bodies lying amidst the devastation moans, pushing up
with one bloody hand as she tries to rise to her knees, her long hair
tossing in the bitter wind, as she tries to face the man. He looks at
her, a smile of pleasure crossing his face, as he raises his left hand
to her, then clenches his fist, in a slow, almost sensual manner. With a
crackling roar, wildfire bursts up from the ruined pavement upon which
the girl stands, enveloping her now-writhing figure in a tossing,
crackling tower of flame, her outline barely visible within it as she
screams, a high, shrieking wail ripped raw and bleeding from her throat
until the flames die to reveal little more than some scraps of
carbonised bone among greasy ashes...
Skuld-sama: "HHHEEEEYYY! He can't get away with trashing Oneesama!"
Jim: "Skuld-sama, it still just a dream..."
Skuld-sama: "I've got a mind to singlehandedly revive the revengefic
biz!"
Jim: "Ok, Ok, chill out for now though, let's see what else he writes."
Skuld-sama: (stuffs her mouth with ice cream again)
<snip>
Slowly, with the solid, inescapable certainty of a glacier, the man
turns, until he is staring him straight in the face. If it wasn't for
those eyes, he might even be able to see what he looks like. But those
glaring, hate-filled, eyes dominate everything, staring at him,
seeming to drive an icepick into his brain. He tries again to move,
desperate now, only wanting to get away, but he seems immersed in
jelly...
The man starts to smile. Not a pleasant smile, more like a starving
shark that's just seen a helpless swimmer appear on his lunch menu.
The terrible, staring eyes start to glow with a baleful wildfire, as if
small flames were flickering in the depths of them, growing stronger,
fiercer, devouring. Making one final, frantic effort, he tries to hurl
himself backwards, just as the figure starts to laugh again, a manic,
shivering wolf-howl of anticipation and terror...
Jim: "Cool prose. He's doing a good job with the forboding mood.
I particularly like the *starving shark smile*, he better copywrite
it before I borrow it."
<snip>
He makes his drink, and finally relaxes as he starts to sip the bitter,
caffeine-loaded brew...
"Aaah, that's better. This should help me sleep again. Better get back
to bed, its bloody cold for November. Haven't had it this cold so early
for.. I can't remember when..."
Jim: (swigs more Jolt) Hummm, I've been tired enough that caffeine
couldn't keep me awake, but I think if I did what he just did I'd
be up for a few hours."
Skuld-sama: "Caffeine is bad for you guys and worse for us. (pops a
spoonful of Choc Choc Chip into her mouth) 'Cept for Chocolate."
Grimacing, he hurriedly returns to his bedroom, slipping back under the
blankets as he cradles his coffee, sipping it as he starts to relax
properly at last. After all, while scary, this WAS only a dream. And
dreams can't hurt you, can they...
************************************************************************
Part 2 - To boldly go where no-one has boldly gone boldly before
(boldly)
Scene :
The <name?> temple, a crisp early November morning. The sky is clear,
Jim: "Chan Wei Lik already posted some very good C&C on this, in fact I
didn't know the name of the temple until he posted it. Chan says its
in the film comic, which I think is the manga adaptation of the OAV(s).
Skuld-sama: (nodding) "Tarikihonganji Temple"
<snip>
The scene pans slowly left-to-right, then zooms inwards, showing us the
interior of a kitchen. This is currently occupied by four people; two
women, a girl, and a man.
Jim: "Chan's right about this part too, you guys eat in the living room,
or I call it a TV/Dining room, but anyway, there's no place for people
to
eat in your kitchen, right?"
Skuld-sama: "Right"
The younger of the two women is humming happily, a pleasant lift-muzac
sort of tune as she continues to prepare and serve a sumptuous
breakfast for the others. Her feet hardly seem to touch the floor as
she glides about, deftly preparing and setting out food, a small happy
smile on her face. Belldandy is obviously a morning person (er,
goddess).
Urd, on the other hand, most certainly isn't. Hands cupping a steaming
mug of black coffee, she looks blearily at the breakfast TV/News
programs, occasionally taking a sip and huddling a bit more back into
her robe; despite the warmth of the stove, there is still an occasional
waft of cold air drifting through the kitchen.
Skuld and Keiichi are busy devouring the food in front of them, Keiichi
with the somewhat preoccupied air of someone who is torn between taking
his time to enjoy the food, and being late for classes, with the added
bonus of being able to take a few moments out to worry about what his
Auto-club friends are liable to have gotten him into today. Skuld is
just eating, neatly and efficiently, while next to her a small mecha
holds and steadily turns the pages of the current Scientific American
for her to read, occasional small giggles from her breaking the soft
sound of munching as she sees a conjecture she finds particularly
naiive or amusing.
Skuld-sama: "Here's someone else who writes me better than you!"
Jim: "Hey! Alright with Mech envy already."
Skuldsama: "Call it *Devine Inspiration". (she gestures) When next
Jim writes of Skuld, he will include MORE MECHA! And cool ones too,
like that little page turning guy. I wonder how many other features
I crammed in it's chassi, I'm SUCH a genius! (eats more Ice Cream)
He's got the rest of our attitudes down too."
<snip>
Keiichi looks up, alarmed, to see a broken cup at Belldandy's feet,
while she is holding her palm against her forehead.
"Bell-chan! Are you OK?"
<snip>
Belldandy smiled, a trifle shakily, but reassuringly at Keiichi.
"I'm sorry, Keiichi-kun, the cup was slipery with soap and I dropped
it. I wasn't paying attention and it startled me."
Jim: "Again, Chan already covered the *forms of address* stuff. It's
always gotta be *Keiichi-san*. And you always call her
*Onee-sama*. I think most of us who've heard the OAV's with the
Japanese voices are pretty attached to this. The way your sister
says *Keiichi-san* and you say *Onee-sama* gets to us. It's like
you're undermining the formality of the title's literal meaning with
the tone of your voices, making it more intimate than an informal
name could be."
Skuld-sama: (blushing) "Don't go all poetical on us! Geee! Keep
reading!"
<snip>
In his preoccupation, he didn't see the covert looks that Belldandy and
her sisters exchanged, ones of `What's REALLY the matter, you don't
really expect us to believe that lame explanation' , and `Shush, I'll
explain it all once Keiichi is out of the way'.
Jim: "I'm really impressed with this image. I'ts a cool way to
establish
the closeness between you three."
Oblivious (as usual) to all the sisterly non-verbal communication going
on over his head, Keiichi smiled, and stretched upward slightly to kiss
Belldandy gently on the cheek.
Skuld-sama: "WILL ALL YOU HENTAI FANBOYS COOL IT WITH MY SISTER AND
KEIICHI ALREADY!!!!!!"
Jim: (bigsweats) "What Chan said, ...in his C&C post that is..."
Skuld-sama: "AND THAT ESPECIALLY MEANS _YOU_ NUTLEY!"
<snip>
"The Auto club dosn't have anything planned tonight, so I'll be home
the usual time, OK, Bell-chan?"
She smiled at him, and squeezed his hand gently.
"Of course, I'll have dinner waiting for you, Keiichi. Go on now, you
don't want to be late"
Jim: "Hey, what happened to the *Ultimate Force*? I guess it's open to
interpretation, but I have the impression that Keiichi and Belldandy
literally can't be separated for 8 or more hours unless they prepare
beforehand or get special permission/intervention"
<snip>
Skuld nodded in agreement, one hand idly playing with the handle of the
long bug-smashing hammer on her back.
Skuld-sama: "I don't fidgit like that."
Jim: "Sure you do."
Skuld-sama: "NO, I don't!"
<snip>
Skuld shook her head.
"I'm sorry, oneechan, none. In fact, there is the lowest level of bug
activity I've ever seen, I don't think I've ever heard of them being so
peaceful. Whatever upset you, it can't have been a bug infestation."
Skuld-sama: "I wonder what he's getting at. A dip below statistical
background in bug production would be unusual, so he's got to be
foreshadowing something. Unless he just hates bugs as much as I
do and wants to get them out of the way."
<snip>
Skuld just scowled deeper, muttering something under her breath about
incompetant, bulls and china-shops, fortunately too softly for Urd to
hear.
Skuld-sama: "Why would I pass up the chance to get in a good one on
Urd?"
Jim: "He said it was a darkfic up front, I think that's going to
translate into muted behavior all around, so as not to detract from the
mood. I don't blame him, it's hard to cower in fear just after you've
laughed your head off."
<snip>
Grabbing the rest of the letters, I moved on to more important, nay,
vital matters, like morning coffee. Heading for the kitchen, I quickly
sorted the letters...Bill, bill, junk, junk.. Ordinary letters into the
basket, junk into the bin, bills into the `pending - too difficult'
tray.
Jim: "Hey, he sorts stuff like me."
Skuld-sama: "Simple Heap sort, i.e. *The programmer couldn't
be bothered to think of anything clever, so...*"
Jim: "Give us a break! Please."
Skuld-sama: "Can't help myself, once a debugger...."
<snip>
I found to my
surprise that I was holding the envelope in my hand again, slowly
turning it over and looking at it.
That was odd, I couldn't remember picking it up.
Skuld-sama and Jim together: "Da Da DAAAAAA!" (acapella scary music)
<snip>
My hand finally touched the remote, and with a gasp of relief, I gripped
it hard - only to find my fingers move past, not through, the unit! I
think it was about then I started to panic seriously, but not for long,
as the colours filled my vision, spiralling and swirling as I felt
myself both sitting still and being pulled up into the pattern with
increasing speed, as I tasted the red-orange flicker of the flames, and
felt the scratching touch of the soundtrack against my skin, the images
slowly turning to small pinpoints of coruscating brilliance, as I lost
consciousness...
Skuld-sama: "Eeeee, that was strange."
Jim: "Not the behavior of your *ordinary* household video appliance."
<snip>
Small markings on cheeks and forehead.
Check
It's Urd.
Oh shit...
At this point, I decided to do the only sensible thing under the
circumstances.
I fainted.
Fortunately (?) I didn't remain unconscious for long.
I opened my eyes to the sound of a rather heated argument.
Urd was shouting and gesturing wildly at another girl, this one young,
dressed in red and white with long ebony hair and similar facial
markings.
Skuld too? I thought to myself.
This was crazy. Or I was crazy. Whatever.
In my current state, I hardly worried about whether they were real or
not. I suppose I was still in shock.
The argument seemed to be getting more than a little heated, with the
two girls almost standing on top of me as they yelled insults at each
other in Japanese. For once, I was rather glad I didn't understand much
Japanese... Interesting view from down here, though. Urd is definitely > the sole supporter of two dependents...uhh, better not follow THAT > thought through.
Skuld-sama: "Ecchi is right!"
Jim: "Hummm, I never thought of them as *pendulous* before, although
maybe the word *dependents* isn't meant to convey that association...
*round*, yeah, *full*, yeah, *inviting*..."
Skuld-sama: "STOP IT!!"
Jim: "Gomen."
Still ignoring me, the argument got louder and more violent. Urd's hands
started to move in some strange gestures, and Skuld (from where, I
couldn't see) had aquired one of those hi-tech grenade-bombs of hers. I
decided I didn't really want to be this close to the approaching
conclusion, I somehow suspected they'd both fire first, and worry about
innocent bystanders (and presumably by-layers) later.
I essayed a soft interjection.
"Ano...?"
Nothing.
"Sumimasen..."
Still nothing.
This time I yelled. Loudly.
"HEY!!!"
( to be continued)
Jim: "Well, He's got me interested. I look forward to the next part."
Skuld-sama: "Me too, although all the things that annoy me about YOUR
fic's seem to be in HIS fic's as well." (pops the third empty pint
carton of Haggen-Daz Ice Cream into the trash, over her sholder)
Jim: "Sighhhh."