Forget fictional characters, let's get into reality.  Here are
the top 10 lines you'll never hear me say on the FFML.

10.  Ryouga and Ukyou, of course!  After all, it's in the anime,
so it's canon!

9.  I've almost finished that author fic.  You guys mind if I
steal Akane from Ranma? (Vaughn, is that you?)

8.  Hey, let's remember, these are *comedies*!  Let's not get
too serious...(oops, this is an actual quote from someone else...
calling the Lovely Angels...)

7.  Just gotta send that Keiichi rape scene off to Kun-chan for
prereading...

(As a sidebar, how 'bout Top 10 things Kun-chan would never say
on this list.  I'll make it harder: you can't use Trish Ledoux.)

6.  HEY D00DZ1!1!  WHERE CAN I FIND THOZE COOL PORNO RANMA FICS 
I KEEP HEARING ABOUT!!!

5.  Richard Lawson?  Eh.  Overrated.

4.  I could just sit here arguing the same things about Akari and
Ukyou all day... (whoops, that's the CORML)

3.  I've decided to have Keiichi and Belldandy get a quickie 
divorce.  Thanks, Jeff!

2.  To hell with characterization, where's the martial arts?

and the #1 thing you'll never hear me say on the FFML...
(and I was tempted to say Buttafuoco here, but didn't):

1.  Of course I loved Within the Candle Flame!!!  Totally in
character!

--Sean Gaffney
--seriously tired...