Hi everyone...
Now it's been a little while since I posted anything to
the FFML - so I figured since this part is pretty much complete I'd
send it along for some opinions.
I'm going to just let everyone know that this Fic is a
continuation to my Oh My God series - so you really should
read it before you get started with this (or it won't make any
sense at all!) - for those interested in reading the series... I'm
sending a complete update to the remailer (finally!) - and it should be
online soon...
Also for those people who don't like the 'self-indulgant'
kind of FanFics, don't bother reading.. I write this Fic for
myself first.. and then everyone else second...
Anyway.. for those of you that have been waiting for
this... enjoy!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Kasumi hummed as she chopped up the vegetables for
dinner, "Oh.. I hope I got enough for everyone", she thought
to herself. It had been exactly two years since Ranma and his
father had arrived from China, and her father had decided to
celebrate the 'happy' day that Ranma and Akane had become
engaged.
She finished the preparations quickly and left the meal
to simmer for a while, the place still needed a good clean
with the number of guests that were arriving. Everyone else
had thought that it would make problems, inviting Shampoo and
Ukyou, not to mention inviting Kuno and Kodachi. But since
she had been making out the invitations, it had seemed like
the fair thing to do.
Kasumi smiled secretively, "Maybe this will finally force
Ranma into choosing *one* fiancee", she said under her breath.
Yes, it had taken Kasumi quite a bit of planning to pull this
off, she had kept quite about whom she had invited until this
morning. Now it was too late to change anything, or call it
off. "Nothing can spoil this now", she thought to herself,
and then she began setting the extra-long table in the Dojo.
******
Unfortunately for Kasumi, she was wrong, there was one
thing that could ruin *any* feast. "What have you done?",
Kasumi exclaimed, looking at the remains of her kitchen.
Akane was standing in the middle of destruction, looking
around, "I'm sorry Kasumi-chan", she said, "I only thought
that I'd spice up the rice a little, by adding some of this".
Kasumi looked at the label, "Where did you get lighter
fluid from?", she asked, frowning.
Akane was looking at the remains of the kitchen with
dismay, "I'm so very sorry Kasumi, I'll help you re-make
everything", she promised.
A muffled gagging came from outside the kitchen window
and Kasumi paled slightly, "that's alright Akane-chan", she
said, "I'll figure out something out".
Akane left quickly, her head bowed and her expression
sorrowful. Kasumi looked around at the remains, "What am I
going to do now?", she muttered.
"Anything but let that tomboy cook", suggested Ranma,
climbing in through the window.
Kasumi looked at him with a firm expression, "Ranma, why
didn't you try and stop Akane?", she asked.
Ranma smiled, "Are you kidding, do I look suicidal?", he
said, "besides, do you think I want to sit down with Shampoo
and Kodachi for dinner?".
Kasumi frowned (something very rare indeed), "I went to
the trouble of organising this and I won't have anything ruin
it", she said, turning and stalking back out of the destroyed
kitchen.
Ranma rubbed his head sheepishly, "Maybe I carried it a
little far", he mused and then shuddered, "Never mind,
anything's better than having dinner with Kodachi". With that
he decided to go and spar with his father.
******
Kasumi sat down for a while, to decide the best course of
action. It was too late to call everyone and cancel, since
everyone was suppose to be here in a few minutes (and besides
she wanted everyone to get together and talk things out).
Her eyes bored into the small clock in the dining room,
it was ticking away down to 'zero hour' and there was nothing
that she could think of that could help.
"Hey Kasumi?", called Nabiki, walking into the room,
"Everyone will be here soon, where's dinner?".
Kasumi began to despair and she covered her eyes,
starting to cry, "Nabiki-chan.. nothing's gone right..
dinner's ruined", she sobbed quietly, then she suddenly
shouted, "IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!!".
Nabiki realised that it was *very* unusual to see Kasumi
so shaken, so she sat down beside her sister, "Come on Sis",
she said, "I'm sure we'll working something out".
Kasumi looked up hopefully, "No charge", Nabiki added
with a smile.
Nabiki picked up the phone and placed it in Kasumi's
hand, "Here", she said, "this is the name of a Caterer that
owes me a favour".
Kasumi shook her head, "No thankyou Nabiki", she said,
"I'd rather remake everything myself..".
The phone clicked and a male voice answered, "Goddess..
*AHEM* that is to say: Deity Relief Office.. I'll be right
over for an interview..", it said.
"I'm sorry", Kasumi said into the phone, "I must have the
wrong number". With that she hung up.
Kasumi tried to think how she would be able to cook
enough food quickly, when she stopped and her expression
changed to one of confusion. "Nabiki-chan?", she asked, "Did
father get a back-lit clock today?", she pointed at the
glowing clock on the wall. It seemed to glow brighter as the
seconds passed.
Nabiki frowned, "Not that I know of", she said, "I wonder
how they do that?".
Suddenly there was a bright flash of light and a slight
thump, as another person joined them in the room. "What
the....", exclaimed Nabiki, jumping behind the couch.
Kasumi just stared as the figure shook its head slightly
and looked around. The figure was wearing a shimmering blue
shirt and pants, that seemed to rustle and move, even though
there was no wind present.
He looked around the room with dark brown eyes that
looked out from under black hair. Upon spotting Kasumi he
smiled and walked forward, "Excuse me?", he asked politely,
"Would this be the Tendo residence?".
Kasumi nodded weakly, "Good", the strange fellow replied,
"Is Kasumi Tendo available to talk to?".
Nabiki had crawled out of the room by this time and was
running towards the Dojo to get help. Kasumi nodded, "I'm
Kasumi", she said cautiously.
The fellow smiled broadly, "Good, that means I can get on
with it", he said.
Kasumi looked at him apprehensively, "Oh, don't be
afraid", he said, noting her confusion, "I won't hurt you".
Kasumi didn't look reassured, "Oh, right", he suddenly
said, snapping his fingers, "I didn't introduce myself".
Taking a step or two back he drew himself up to his full
height, "I am the God of Destiny, and I am here to grant you a
wish", he intoned, impressively.
When she remained silent the God scratched his head,
"What?", he said looking at his clothes, "Is the uniform too
much?". He muttered a few words and his clothing shimmered
into a set of well-worn jeans and a black shirt.
Kasumi looked even more confused, "Well I guess that
didn't work", the God of Destiny muttered, taking a seat
opposite Kasumi, "are you gonna say anything?".
"The God of Destiny??", she asked.
The gentleman smiled slightly, "If you like you can call
me Brett".
"A god??", she asked, "Named 'Brett'?".
Brett winced, "Hey that's what my parents named me", he
replied, "it's not that bad a name".
Kasumi shook her head, "Your telling me that *your* a
god?", she asked, "And your here to grant me a wish?".
Brett looked around, "Is there an echo in here?", he
asked, smiling, "Yes, anything your heart desires".
Kasumi was dumbstruck, "A wish?", she exclaimed, "me?".
Brett smiled again, "Thats right", he said, "All you have
to do is...". Suddenly he broke off and looked around, then
he jumped up and grabbed Kasumi around the waist, hauling her
forwards and standing in the middle of the room.
"Excuse my rudeness", he said, blushing slightly, "But
it's safer here".
Kasumi was wondering what he was talking about when the
roof collapsed, several strange objects came in through the
windows and Ranma burst through the door. Surprisingly Kasumi
found herself and the strange man standing in the only place
that wasn't covered in collapsed ceiling.
"Ryouga, you stupid..", said Ranma.
"Watch where your throwing those things bimbo", exclaimed
Ukyou.
"Who you calling 'Bimbo', foolish girl", retorted
Shampoo.
"Kasumi.. my lovely daughter.. are you alright?", wailed
Soun frantically.
<Save the food>, insisted Genma-Panda, waving a sign
around.
Akane was standing slightly behind Ranma by the time the
dust settled and everyone was able to make out the figure of
Kasumi and the stranger standing unharmed in the middle of the
room. "Who the hell are you?", Ranma demanded.
Too Good to be True
An OMG (Oh My God ?) / Ranma1/2 FanFic
Part 1
by
Brett Handy
Brett turned to look at Ranma, "What's going on around
here?", he asked, "Do you always greet visitors this way?".
Nabiki, who was standing off to one side nodded, "If they
appear out of thin air in the middle of the dining room we
do", she said.
Ranma was still standing in a fighting stance, "Who are
you?", he repeated firmly. Shampoo and Ukyou were flanking
him, both holding their respective weapons ready.
Brett sighed, and help Kasumi across the mangled wreckage
of the room, "There you go", he said as she made it to firm
ground.
"Thank you", Kasumi said politely, smiling reassuringly
at Ranma she added, "I don't think he means any harm".
"Let me handle this Kasumi", Ranma replied, stepping
forward and looking straight at the newcomer, "What are you
doing here and who are you?", he demanded again, trying to
grab Brett's arm.
Brett took a step back, just out of Ranma's grasp, "Oh..
sorry", he said, "My name's Brett".
"Alright", said Akane, from behind Ranma, "Then what are
you doing here?".
"Errr...", Brett began, "Well that's a little more
difficult to explain...".
Ranma took another step forward, "Well you'd better start
explaining.. or...", he began.
Brett looked at him dubiously, "Or??", he encouraged.
Ryouga, who had moved up behind Brett, clicked his
knuckles, "Or you're going to get hurt", he finished.
Brett held up his hands, "Hey, I don't like violence", he
said, "All I want to do is talk to Kasumi".
"Hold Knave!", shouted Kuno, stepping in front of Kasumi,
"You shall not prevail against the forces of light, even as
the sorcerer Saotome suggests, you may not approach the
innocent Kasumi Tendo, on my life as a Samurai I swear you may
not touch her".
Brett looked at him curiously, "You got all that in once
sentence?", he said, "I'm impressed".
Kuno, who was drawing another breath (let's face it - if
he didn't he'd be unconscious), raised his sword and charged
at Brett. Not really bothering to fight back, Brett simply
sidestepped Kuno's attack, he seemed to be moving before Kuno
had even decided he was going to attack.
Kuno rammed into Ryouga, sending them both back into the
nearly destroyed dining room, completing the destruction by
hitting one of the remaining house supports. Kuno and Ryouga
received what was left of the roof, right on their heads.
Brett looked at them and winced in sympathy, "Ohhh... that's
gotta hurt", he said.
Brett stepped passed Ranma (who was too busy laughing at
Kuno and Ryouga) and placed a hand on Kasumi's shoulder. Then
after mumbling a few words and making a gesture or two with
his hands, a shimmering shield appeared around the two of
them.
"Kasumi!", shouted Akane, running up and banging on the
shield, ineffectually.
"My daughter!", wailed Soun, frantically jumping from
foot to foot.
******
Inside the sphere there was one confused God. "I don't
believe it", muttered Brett, "My first bloody mission...". He
then noticed Kasumi huddling against one side of the sphere,
obviously a little startled.
"Oh", he said smiling, "Sorry about that, but I didn't
want to get beaten to a bloody pulp, I'm sure you can
understand".
Kasumi nodded, a bit more confident at his friendly
attitude, "How did you do that?", she asked testing the shield
with her finger.
Brett sighed, "I think I already explained that", he said
with a wry grin.
He sat down on the grass, leaning up against the shield,
"So.. back to your wish", he said encouragingly.
Kasumi frowned, "I'm sure I couldn't think of anything",
she said, also sitting (although she kept her distance).
Brett nodded, "I know exactly what you mean", he said,
laughing, "When I got my choice of wish... I got 'drafted'".
Kasumi's eyes opened wider (how does she do that...),
"You had a wish?", she asked, "I thought Gods granted wishes,
not got them".
Brett shook his head, "I'm not exactly a *typical* god",
he said, "I started out as a guy that just happened to wish
for something unusual".
Kasumi smiled, "It looks like you got a good wish", she
said.
Brett grimaced, "Well it's been mostly good", he said,
thinking of Urd and her sisters. Then he remembered Nilthar
and all the problems he had caused, "But there have been a few
hick-ups...", he added after a moment.
Kasumi sat back and nodded, "Well life doesn't turn out
the way you expected", she said, "I never expected to have to
take care of the family, but after mother died....".
Brett looked at her sadly, "I'm sorry", he said.
The conversation paused until Kasumi thought of something
that she noticed earlier, "How did you know that we were going
to be safe where we were standing in the dining room?", she
asked
Brett smiled, "One of the fringe benefits of the job", he
said, "I can see possible threats in the future and then
change things".
"You can see the future?", she asked, amazed.
"Well not really accurately", Brett explained, "Threats I
can usually see, but most of my ability is in the dreams that
I have".
Kasumi clasped her hands in front of her, "That must be
wonderful", she enthused, "To be able to see the future..."
Brett nodded, "It's nice sometimes.. but it drives my
girlfr... Ahhh.. Urd crazy", he replied, smiling.
"You have a girlfriend?", Kasumi asked, looking
interested.
Brett nodded, "Well I suppose I could call her that, her
name's Urd", he said, "We sort of started out as friends and
things went from there".
Kasumi smiled, "That's a good way to start", she agreed.
Brett laughed, "It was almost the way it ended too", he
said, "She wasn't exactly truthful with me at the beginning".
Kasumi frowned, "I'm sorry to hear that", she murmured.
Brett smiled, "But that's ok, we worked things out".
Kasumi lowered her head sadly, "I'm afraid that I'm not
so lucky in love", she said.
Brett shrugged, "Well I'm sure that someone as beautiful
and good as you are, is destined to meet a great guy", he
commented, looking her up and down, "In fact I'm almost
certain of it".
Kasumi's smile was radiant as she accepted the
compliment, "Thank you for saying so", she replied, "But I
think I'm doomed to end up an old maid".
Brett tapped his finger against his head, "Remember", he
said seriously, "You've got a wish due you, that could help".
Kasumi nodded, "I'm sure it would", she said, "But I'd
feel bad forcing anyone into anything".
Brett frowned and rubbed his chin, "Well I can see where
that would be a problem", he said, "But don't worry I think
something can be worked out".
"Thank you", Kasumi said smiling wistfully, "Urd must be
a lucky girl... I wish that I had a boyfriend as supportive as
you...".
Brett winced, "*I* wish you hadn't said that", he said,
closing his eyes and waiting for what he was sure was going to
happen next.
******
Ranma was pacing around the sphere, they had tried
everything, digging under, getting on top, it was impossible
to get inside. "They've been in there for almost half an
hour", Ranma observed as he continued examining the sphere.
They had tried battering it with everything they had,
even Happosai's bombs only made the shield shimmer slightly.
"My daughter..... My daughter.....", Soun wailed pacing
aimlessly back and forth around the sphere.
"What are we going to do?", Akane wondered out loud,
echoing everyone's thoughts.
The wind seemed to rise, swirling around the shield and
whipping about the branches of the old cherry tree. In a few
seconds it had grown in intensity and Ranma found it hard to
stay upright. "What's going on!??!", he shouted over the
shriek of the wind.
Everyone else was too busy holding onto the ground to
answer him. Then as suddenly as it started the wind stopped.
Ranma looked around at his friends, they were all picking
themselves off of the ground. Amazingly there appeared to be
no damage to the house and everything looked the same as
before the wind had arrived.
"What the hell was that?", Ryouga wondered, looking
around bemused.
A moment later his question was forgotten as the shield
convulsed and then broke apart like shattered glass,
disappearing as the shards scattered. Inside was Kasumi,
completely unharmed and smiling happily.
Along side her stood the stranger, he seemed to be a
little tired, till he noticed the ring of people with
dangerous looking weapons surrounding him, "Ahhh... look I can
explain..", he began, standing a bit straighter.
Kasumi nodded, "It's alright", she said, "Brett just
wanted to talk to me for a while".
"Please Kasumi!", begged Soun, "Step away from him".
Brett looked around apprehensively, "I don't want any
trouble", he said, "But I'm not will to be beaten up for my
principles". Suddenly he held a thin sword in his hand and
crouched into something resembling a fighting stance, "En
Guard", he announced.
Kuno took that as a challenge and stepped forward, "So
the sorcerer has become swordsman", he pronounced loudly, "You
foolish knave, prepare to be vanquished by the might of
Tatewaki Kuno!".
"So tell me", Brett said in a conversational tone, "Do
you make those up yourself or do you have a group of failed
writers that supply them?".
Kuno charged, striking as quickly as he could. Brett
parried and blocked, stepping backwards as Kuno advanced, but
never striking back. The moved across the courtyard until
they reached the outer wall, "Are you getting tired yet?",
Brett puffed as he continued to parry and dodge.
"Not in the slightest", Kuno replied, "I am Tatewaki
Kuno, captain of Furinkan High School's Kendo team, I do not
tired easily".
Brett sighed, "Well I do", he said, "And in fact your
putting me to sleep". And with that he parried a thrust, spun
and rammed the hilt guard of his blade into Kuno's skull,
hard.
Kuno stood for a moment, looked at Brett seriously and
then mouthed, "That didn't hurt", before falling unconscious
to the ground.
Brett sighed, "Well I hope your head's thick enough that
you're not seriously hurt", he commented.
******
I shuddered to think how many braincells I'd just killed
in the poor guy's head, god knows he needs every one that he's
got. Looking up I saw to my dismay the rest of my opponents
advancing towards me, looking rather upset. "Please", I
practically begged, "I don't want to fight you".
A young lady with short black hair and a large mallet,
frowned, "Looks like your getting off on the wrong foot then",
she said, indicating Kuno. I don't know why but she seemed to
be a bit familiar.
I stuck the epee into the ground and stepped back, "I'm
sorry, but *he* attacked *me*", I replied.
Kasumi stepped in front of Ranma and the young girl,
"Brett doesn't mean any harm Ranma", she said, "He's here to
help me".
Ranma looked at me strangely, "Your a cook?", he asked
remembering the destroyed kitchen and meal.
I didn't know what was going on, but I nodded, "Oh yeah,
I can cook", I said.
The young girl looked at me curiously, "Have we met
before?", she asked, fingering the mallet.
I thought back, suddenly remembering the girl I had run
into on one of my 'training trips' while I was learning to
travel. Since I had caught her while she was changing, I
didn't think I needed to remind her of our previous encounter.
"We might have", I allowed, "Have you ever been to
Australia?".
Before she could answer, Kasumi stepped forward and
grabbed my hand, "If you'll all excuse us we've got some
dinner to prepare", she said, dragging me into the house.
"But... But how..", Ranma began looking over to where the
shield had been, "How come...".
To my surprise a Panda struck the guy in the head with a
sign, I managed to make out <Shut up - I'm hungry>, written on
it.
I followed Kasumi into the kitchen, it was a mess, broken
cooking utensils and destroyed equipment. I shuddered, "What
the hell happened here?", I wondered out loud.
Kasumi, who had lost her smile, looked at me sadly, "My
sister Akane is not very good at cooking", she admitted.
I looked around, there was not way we were going to get
any work done until we cleaned up the mess. I frowned, "OK,
time to get down to business", I said.
Kasumi looked at me strangely as I began whispering a
spell and gesturing at the room. She gasped as the broken
dishes and bowls jumped off the floor and mended themselves,
going back into the correct cabinets. The repair of the stove
and microwave took a little longer, but was no less
spectacular and in minutes we stood in a perfectly clean room.
She ran a finger over the counter, "It's even been
polished", she noted.
I slumped against the doorframe, a little bit tired from
the effort. I'd have to thank Belldandy for teaching me that
particular spell. With a sigh I forced myself to an upright
position, "Well let's get started", I said.
******
Somehow I managed to keep going throughout the
preparation of dinner. I think that the thought of all those
hungry maniacs outside was all the encouragement that I
needed. Kasumi's energy seemed to be boundless as she raced
around the kitchen. I'd never seen anyone, with the possible
exception of Belldandy, as adept in the kitchen as she was.
"Thank you for the help Brett", she said gratefully, "I
wouldn't have been able to get this finished on my own".
I nodded weakly, "That's alright", I replied, "But I
don't think I've ever had to cook quite so quickly before".
Kasumi smiled, "I'm used to it, living here", she said.
Grabbing up one of the platters of food I gestured for
her to proceed me out the door, "Ladies first!", I encouraged.
To be honest I wasn't sure if I'd be attacked the moment I
left, so I needed some running room.
We walked outside and into what Kasumi called 'The Dojo'.
Now I've always been able to pick up the general feel of a
room full of people and to say there was an 'undercurrent of
hostility' would have been a massive understatement. If the
Jacksons had a family reunion it's atmosphere would have been
more friendly.
Helping Kasumi serve out the food I noticed that there
seemed to be several little groups forming. The young guy
named Ranma seemed to be constantly surrounded by three of the
girls, while he himself seemed to be spending most of his time
teasing the girl named Akane for some reason or another. The
two older gentleman were quite comfortable sitting at one end
of the table, each gulping down their helpings ravenously.
That left a trio of young men (one of which I'd fought
earlier) sitting together.
I quickly dished out their meals and made to leave, but a
hand on my arm stopped me. I looked down to see that the guy
that I'd knocked out earlier was looking at me curiously,
"What manner of man are you that you fight so well, yet you
would degrade yourself by performing menial tasks that no
*warrior* should have to bother with?", he asked expansively,
"You are certainly no Samurai"
I pulled my arm away, "I'm a guest that lends help when
the lady of the house needs it", I replied. Then getting into
it I decided to continue my little speech, "Is it not the
obligation of every true Samurai to aid those in distress and
help in any way possible?".
Kuno frowned, "You speak the truth, however I Tatewaki
Kuno would never stoop so low as to dirty my hands in such
effort", he replied.
I shrugged, "How little you value your own code then", I
said, turning and walking away.
Kuno's mouth worked silently for a moment or two and then
he decided that he was hungry and began eating. Kasumi began
dealing out drinks for everyone, so I decided to finish my
rounds, passing a plate to a girl that introduced herself as
Nabiki. She was quite attractive, but there was a glint in
her eye that made me a bit cautious.
"Here you are", I said, placing it in front of her.
"Thank you", she said, "I saw you trying to talk to Kuno
before?".
I nodded and she shook her head, "Don't bother, I've been
trying to talk some sense into him for about a decade, no
success yet".
I smiled at that and shrugged, "It never hurts to try", I
replied.
Nabiki took a small taste of her meal and nodded, "That's
very good", she said, "Kasumi's outdone herself this time".
I nodded, "Yes, she's a fine cook", but then I couldn't
keep the amusement out of my voice as I added, "Actually *I*
made that particular dish".
Nabiki looked at me cautiously, "So jumping out of clocks
isn't your only ability?", she asked.
I began to sweat a little, "Err... what do you mean??", I
asked.
She nodded, "I just bet you don't know anything about
it", she said sarcastically, "Just like you don't know how to
form a forcefield or change the weather".
I began to get nervous when I noticed that the other
conversations around the room had stopped and everyone was
watching and listen to us. "Well the forcefield thing is...
well... umm.... a...", I began.
"It's a Ki-Shield", said Kasumi helpfully.
Everyone (including me) looked at her questioningly and
she nodded, "It's like some of those moves that Ranma and
Ryouga use", she explained, "But defensive rather than used
for attack".
I didn't have any idea what she was talking about, but I
nodded, "That sounds pretty close", I agreed hastily.
Everyone was looking at Kasumi strangely, "Are you
alright Sis?", asked Akane.
Kasumi shrugged and continued to serve drinks, "Just
trying to help", she said.
Nabiki gave me a long look, "I'm sure", she said, before
turning back to her meal. I had the feeling that this young
lady would be a problem.
******
I sat beside Kasumi as dinner began, getting an
explanation of what was going on. According to her, this was
suppose to be a celebration of Ranma and Akane's engagement.
I winced as Akane punched Ranma in the jaw for a comment
he'd made about her attempt to help with dinner. "JERK!", she
said, calmly beginning to eat her meal again.
I frowned at Kasumi, "They're engaged??", I asked, "They
look more like they hate each other".
Kasumi nodded, "Oh they didn't agree to the engagement,
Daddy is forcing them into it", she explained.
I opened my eye's in shock, "That's horrible!", I
exclaimed.
Kasumi shrugged, "It's a matter of honour", she said.
I swallowed back my response and concentrated on
understanding the people around the table, Ranma seemed to be
getting lots of attention from the other girls at the table
with him, "Who are they", I said quietly, indicating Ukyou and
Shampoo.
"They are Ranma's other fiancees", she said.
"Other fiancees?", I echoed.
She nodded and then proceeded to tell me the story of how
Ranma had acquired the other girls. I shuddered as Kodachi
began laughing at something or other, "And what's her story?",
I asked.
Kasumi sighed, "She's a raving psychotic who's fixiated
on Ranma", she replied.
I shuddered, "That guy must have been beaten with an
unlucky stick", I said, "I've never heard anything even
remotely like this before".
Kasumi shrugged, "After two years you tend to get used to
it", she replied.
Dinner continued, with the occasional fight or two, until
late that night. I was only just keeping my eyes open by the
time the last of the guests left. A hand on my shoulder
brought me back to reality and I looked up to see Kasumi
standing over me, "Come on", she said, "We had better find you
a place to sleep".
I nodded weakly, transporting myself now would have been
a big mistake. I got up and followed her into the house,
heading upstairs.
She knocked on a door and got a muffled "What'd ya want",
from inside.
I followed her in and saw Ranma stretched out on the
floor beside a large Panda. "What's *he* doing here?", Ranma
asked sleepily.
Kasumi pulled a blanket out of the cupboard, "He's
sleeping here for tonight", she replied.
Ranma sat up and looked me carefully in the eye, "Do you
snore?", he asked bluntly.
I shook my head, "Nope", I mumbled and then looked at the
Panda, "Does *he* bite?".
Ranma smiled slightly, "Only if you wake him suddenly",
he replied, "Or have food hidden on your person".
Kasumi gave me a blanket and said goodnight, retiring to
her own room. I laid down comfortably and closed my eyes. A
few minutes later a hand shook my shoulder and I heard a
whispered, "Are you awake".
"No", I replied, keeping my eyes shut.
"Come on, I just wanna talk", came Ranma's response.
I sighed and rolled over to face him, "Yeah?", I asked
sleepily. Then I noticed that the Panda was also sitting up
looking at me. I scrubbed at my eyes, "What do ya want?".
Ranma looked at me closely, "You don't look like a
martial artist", he commented.
I nodded, "I'm not", I said bluntly.
Ranma and the Panda exchanged a glance (I was too tired
to recognise the significance of this), "You must be a martial
artist if you can use your Ki to form attacks", Ranma
insisted, "So what have you studied".
I sat up slowly, "Right now I'd like to be studying
'sleep and it's effect on the body'", I said, "But I've never
studied martial arts before".
Ranma still looked confused, so I continued, "I guess you
could say that I've picked up a few abilities over the years
that *resemble* the tricks that Kasumi said you are capable
of".
"But can you teach them?", Ranma asked hopefully.
I shook my head, "I don't think you'd be able to learn
what I can teach", I replied. Then noticing his outraged
expression I held up my hands defensively, "Hey.. it's not
that you couldn't learn them, but you've got to be a 'unusual'
person to *use* them".
The Panda grunted and laid down to get some more sleep
and Ranma laid back down too, "Ahh well", he said, "We'll talk
more about it tomorrow". While I'd have liked to have
continued talking to him, sleep overcame me.
******
A hand touched my shoulder, "Brett", said a female voice,
"Time to get up".
I rolled over, "G'way Belldandy, I'm still tired", I
replied sleepily.
"He's almost as bad as Ranma", said another voice from
somewhere on the other side of the room.
That woke me up quickly. I sat up and looked around,
remembering where I was. Kasumi was looking at me with a
happy smile on her face, "Good morning!", she greeted me.
"Good morning to you too", I replied, working my way
slowly to my feet. I looked over to where Akane was kicking
Ranma into consciousness and winced sympathetically.
Ranma rolled with the kick and came up into a fighting
stance. Unfortunately he rolled right over the large Panda
who took exception to being woken up. Ranma disappeared out
the window with a sign plastered against his chest that read
"Let sleeping Pandas lie!".
I heard a splash from outside followed by a woman's
scream. I closed my eyes and shuddered, this place was a
total madhouse and I was trapped here. Well I was trapped
until I could come up with a way out of that wish Kasumi had
made.
"Oh don't mind Ranma and his father", Kasumi said, "They
do that every morning".
"You must go through a *lot* of windows around here", I
replied.
I heard a voice from outside the window, "You *UNCUTE*
tomboy!!!", it was a female voice I hadn't heard before.
Akane ran to the window, "PERVERT!!", she shouted,
jumping from the window.
I ran over to the window and looked down to see Akane
chasing a red-headed girl into the Dojo, "Was that another
example of the 'morning routine' around here?", I asked
Kasumi.
She nodded, "I've made some breakfast if you would like
some", she said.
I smiled, "That's great, but I thought *I* was suppose to
be helping *you*", I replied. We walked downstairs and into
the living room (now also being used as a dining room, till
the workmen repair the damages of yesterday) and Kasumi
gestured for me to take a seat at the table, "Everyone else
will be here soon", she said, "Feel free to start if you're
hungry".
Since I was feeling hungry after yesterday I dug straight
in, polishing off my meal quickly. Just after I'd finished a
red-headed girl walked into the room, she had a large bruise
covering one side of her face and was dripping wet. I stood
and bowed to her, "I don't think we've been introduced", I
said, "The name's Brett".
She nodded, "Sure", she said, slumping down on the other
side of the table, rubbing the bruise tenderly.
I frowned, "How on earth did you get a bruise like
that?", I asked.
The girl looked at me angrily, "That macho chick did it
to me", she replied.
"The who??", I asked, not understanding the reference.
"The UNCUTE tomboy...", she said shortly.
"Huh?!", I replied.
"AKANE DID THIS TO ME!!", she finally shouted at me.
I held up my hands, "Hey don't get upset", I said. I
walked around the table to her and examined the bruise, "Would
you mind if I had a look at that?", I asked.
"You a doctor?", she asked hopefully.
I shrugged, "Nope, but I do have some skill at healing",
I replied.
She grunted an affirmative and turned her head so I could
get a better look. I touched it gingerly and she hissed in
pain, "Sorry", I muttered.
Checking around to make sure no one else was around I
quietly began whispering a minor healing spell. The girl
startled at the flash of light and rolled away from me coming
into a fighting stance on the other side of the room. I
smiled, "That should help", I explained
The red-head touched the side of her face carefully,
noticing no pain she moved to a mirror. "How did you do
that?", she asked.
I shrugged, "Just a talent", I replied.
The rest of the family took that moment to appear, all
sitting around the table. I re-took my seat and looked
around, someone was missing, "Where's Ranma?", I asked.
Nabiki looked at the red-head sitting beside her, "Well
actually", she began.
The red-head clapped a hand across Nabiki's mouth, "He's
gone for a morning run", she explained.
I smiled at her, "By the way, you never introduced
yourself", I pointed out.
"I'm Ran... ko", she said brokenly.
I nodded, "Ranko it is then", I said smiling.
I noticed the strange looks around the table and looked
at the family indignantly, "WHAT??", I asked.
They all shrugged as a group and went back to devouring
the meal. The meal lasted for a few more minutes, everyone
enjoying it immensely. After it was finished and everyone had
sat back contentedly, Kasumi spoke up, "Brett will be staying
with us for a while", she announced.
"What are you talking about?", Soun asked, "I've already
got to support two freeloaders and three daughters, I can't
*afford* adding another to the list".
I frowned at him, "Mr Tendo", I began, "I am quite
prepared to work for my board".
He looked shocked, "You would?", he asked hopefully.
I smiled, "Never let it be said that I 'freeload' off
anyone", I replied. Ranko winced slightly at my statement and
the Panda seemed to suddenly be occupied with eating as much
as possible.
Ranko was looking at me strangely, "Why are you
staying?", she asked.
"Errr... Ummm... well...", I glanced at Kasumi and she
shrugged.
"Ahhhhh", Mr Tendo said knowingly, "You're here because
of Kasumi".
Not really knowing what else to do I nodded,
"Excellent!", he said, "You look like a fine young man and if
you turn out to be as good as your word.. I'll be happy to let
you marry my little girl".
My jaw dropped and my eye's bugged out, "Marriage?", I
asked.
He nodded, "Consider yourselves engaged!", he proclaimed.
Then tears came to his eyes and he began crying happily, "Now
we can have a double-wedding!", he said happily
Everyone finished up their meals and left the room, with
the exception of Kasumi. I looked at her in shock, "I don't
believe this place, I come here for a simple 'wish granting',
next thing I know I'm engaged to marry someone I just met...",
I broke off at the expression on her face.
"Oh.. I'm sorry, I didn't mean it that way..", I said
lamely, "It's just that I've already got a girlfri....".
"What's wrong", Kasumi asked, noticing the expression of
mixed fear/horror on my face.
"Urd's gonna kill me", I concluded.
******
"I still don't know why *I've* gotta show him around",
Ranma complained loudly to Kasumi.
Kasumi gave Ranma a little smile, "Because unless he gets
to the market, there will be no dinner tonight", she
explained.
"Hey.. slow down mate", Brett complained, as Ranma
dragged him from the Tendo Residence, towards Nerima's
shopping district.
"Hurry up", Ranma ordered, "The sooner I show you were to
go the sooner I can get back home".
Brett shook his arm loose, "Look I appreciate the help,
but I'd really like to keep my arm from being torn off", he
complained, massaging his shoulder.
Ranma shrugged and jumped onto the fence, "Just keep
moving then", he said.
"Why are you doing that?", Brett asked, watching Ranma
walk along the top of the thin fence.
"I just like to", Ranma replied, "It helps me keep my
balance".
Brett nodded, "I guess that would be important for a
Martial Artist", he observed, "But it sure makes it hard to
carry on a conversation".
Ranma gave Brett a glance, "What do you want to talk
about?", he asked.
Brett scratched the back of his head, "Well how about
what that Panda was doing in your room last night?", he asked.
Ranma shrugged, "He didn't want to sleep outside", he
replied shortly.
"Urrr.. ok", Brett began, "To put it another way.. What
are you doing with a Panda as a pet?".
Ranma shrugged, "He's not mine", he responded.
Brett and Ranma walked quickly to the market and spent
about half an hour shopping for things that Kasumi needed for
making dinner. Ranma basically stood around looking bored
while Brett picked out the food to bring back.
"That should do it", Brett said finally.
"Good", Ranma replied, "You can find your own way back,
I've got something important to do".
With that Ranma took off in a rush, obviously overjoyed
at being relieved of his 'babysitting' duties. Brett sighed
and continued back towards the Tendo Dojo. About five minutes
later he noticed a cloud of dust rising into the air behind
him and frowned, "What on earth??", he wondered, moving over
to the side of the road.
A few seconds Brett saw a rather small old man running up
the road, he was carrying a large sack of what appeared to be
women's undergarments. Across his face he wore a black mask
that covered only his eyes. But he was not the one making the
dustcloud, it was the thirty or so women chasing him that were
responsible for that.
"Ahhh my lovelies, I've liberated you all to be with me",
the old man cackled happily.
Brett watched the old man approach, the women were
shouting something about 'Thief, Pervert, Old letch!!", and
other generally unpleasant terms. The old man saw Brett
standing beside the road and noticed the bag full of food.
"Yum!", he shouted, "I tend to get hungry after such a
successful raid". And with that he headed straight towards
Brett.
Brett looked around nervously, trying to find some way to
escape. Seeing none he placed the bag on the ground and
raised his arms, "I don't think you want to do that", he
called to the old man.
"YOUNG WHELP!", the old pervert shouted, "You think *you*
can stand against the mighty Happosai?!?! Fool, prepare to be
trampled!!".
Brett completed the spell he was casting and calmly
picked up the bag. About 3 feet from Brett a shimmering wall
appeared, Happosai didn't have time to stop and hit it at full
speed.
A resounding *CLANG!* echoed across the city and Happosai
fell from the shiled, unconscious. Brett winced and dispelled
the shield, "You ok?", he asked.
"P... P.... panties", Happosai responded.
Brett shook his head at the old man and then noticed that
the mob of women were approaching quickly. He stepped back
quickly as they proceeded to pound Happosai into the ground
and retrieve their respective clothes.
"Are you with him?", one of the angry women asked Brett
suspiciously.
Brett nervously backed up a step, "No.. I'm just an
innocent bystander out doing the shopping", he replied.
The woman looked him up and down, "Alright then", she
said. A moment later the women left, trampling Happosai one
more time for good measure. Brett shook his head and
continued on his way home.
Happosai came into consciousness about an hour later, and
spat out the dirt he'd swallowed. He had one image in his
head, that young upstart who'd made a fool of him would pay...
*******
I returned to the Tendo's place, still amazed that the
old man had survived such a vicious attack. Depositing the
food in the kitchen I noticed a note from Kasumi, it read:
'I've gone to return some books to Dr Tofu, be back soon'.
I nodded, wondering who 'Dr Tofu' was. The workmen had
finished their repairs on the dining room earlier that
morning. I was stunned at how quickly they'd repaired it.
When I asked one of the workmen, he'd just shrugged and
replied, "It's become a routine repair job", he said, "So we
know exactly what has to be done and what to bring along".
I walked outside and into the Dojo, where I heard someone
practising. I knocked on the door and got a 'come in' from
inside.
Inside I saw Akane crouched over a pile of cinder blocks,
she seemed to be concentrating very hard. A moment later she
brought her hand down, splitting three of the four down the
middle.
"Damn!", she swore, "I thought I had it that time".
I gaped at her, "That's incredible!", I said, "You're
splitting cinder blocks???".
She shrugged, "I'm trying to split all four of them", she
said, "But no such luck yet".
I noticed a small black pig, sitting watching her, "And
who's this?", I asked curiously.
Akane smiled and picked up the little piglet and hugged
him, "This is P-Chan", she said.
I nodded and scratched the pig behind the ears, "G'day P-
Chan, I'm Brett", I said, introducing myself.
The pig didn't seem to like me very much, because it
squirmed around nervously. Akane smiled and placed it back on
the floor near where she was practising, "I thought Ranma was
suppose to be showing you around", she said.
I shrugged, "Well he said he had something important to
do so I came back by myself", I explained.
Akane frowned, "Ranma doing something 'important'??", she
mused, "Nope, doesn't sound right.. there are only to
important things to Ranma; Marital Arts and his stomach".
I watched as she hurried from the room and back inside to
change. Glancing at the pig, who seemed to be watching her to
I shrugged, "Hey, what am I suppose to do?', I asked it
defensively, "I don't know Ranma well enough yet to judge if
he's telling the truth or not".
P-Chan grunted and made a 'bwee' sound. I smiled, "You
don't like Ranma much then I take it?", I asked.
The pig nodded and I looked at it in amazement, "You are
certainly an intelligent pig", I observed.
P-Chan grunted and walked outside and headed for the main
house, probably looking for Akane. I shrugged and continued
my inspection of the Dojo, it looked pretty nice, if a little
well-worn. A moment later P-Chan re-appeared from the back
entrance of the Dojo and grunted in disappointment.
I looked at him, "Lost?", I asked.
The pig nodded again, so I grabbed him by the collar,
"Your looking for Akane?", I asked.
It grunted affirmatively and I tucked it under my arm,
ignoring it's struggles, "Stop squirming or I won't take you
to Akane", I ordered.
P-Chan stopped struggling and I walked back inside the
main house, to find Kasumi had returned from her delivery and
was busy making dinner. She smiled as I entered the kitchen,
"I see you've met P-Chan", she observed.
I nodded and glanced at the little pig tucked under my
arm, "Yes, he seems to want to find Akane", I explained, "You
wouldn't know where she is would you??".
Kasumi nodded, "She said something about going to the
Nekohanten to find Ranma", she explained.
"Could you give me directions?", I asked, "It would do me
good to see more of the area".
Kasumi nodded and gave me precise instructions on how to
get to the Nekohanten. I left the Tendo home soon after,
having gone over the instructions with Kasumi twice. To cut a
long story short, I was lost in about five minutes. Have you
ever noticed how easy instructions seem until you have to
follow them? Anyway I was soon wondering the streets of
Nerima, with no idea where I was going.
I looked at the pig on my shoulder (I put him there early
into the trip), "You got any idea where we're we are suppose
to go?", I asked him.
The pig looked at me, "BWEE!!!!", it said, tapping on my
shoulder.
I followed the little fellow's suggestions for a while,
till I noticed we were getting further and further from Tokyo
itself, "Hold it a minute", I said to the pig, "It can't be
that way, that's the highway leading north!".
The pig gave a derisive, "BWEE BWEE!!" and sat grumpily
on my shoulder.
I looked around to see if there were any people around,
noticing no one I pulled out an old watch I carried around.
Placing the watch on the ground I gave the pig a quick glance,
"I wouldn't tell anyone about this if I were you", I advised
it.
Chanting the words to the transport spell, I quickly
teleported to my own room back in the temple. "That's
better", I observed, "I needed to talk to the Goddesses
anyway".
Prying the pig from my shoulder proved impossible, it had
an iron grip and seemed a little shocked. Deciding not to
bother removing it I walked into the hallway, looking for the
Goddesses.
Belldandy was humming happily in the kitchen as she made
dinner, "Brett-san!", she said in greeting, "Dinner is almost
ready, will you be staying??".
I nodded, "It might be better to discuss this over
dinner, now that you mention it", I mused.
"Oh good, I'll set another place for you then", she said,
bustling around the room.
I nodded and decided that I definitely needed a bath,
nodding to Belldandy I made my way to the bathroom. Taking
off my clothes normally proved impossible (due to the little
'clinger' I had acquired) so I simply made the clothes vanish
with a wave of my hand and a muttered spellword.
The pig was startled by the sudden disappearance of his
grip on my shoulder and fell face first into the water. I
muttered a curse and fished around in the water for him, my
hand closed on his collar and I gave a heave. To my utter
shock, a full grown guy rose to the surface, my hand had
caught not the piglet's collar, by the guy's headband.
"What the hell??", I muttered. Examining the guy's
features I noticed that he had the same bemused expression on
his face as the piglet and also the headband looked
suspiciously like the collar the piglet had been wearing.
I slapped the guy across the face a few times, trying to
shake him out of his stunned state. He shook out of it
alright and launched a right-cross at my head. Ducking it I
retreated across the room, "P-Chan?", I asked.
"I AM NOT P-CHAN!!!!!!", the guy shouted angrily and
began advancing on me.
I frowned, "Well if you're not him, where did he go when
he fell in the hot water and why are you in *my* bathroom
wearing nothing but a headband?", I observed.
Ryouga stopped for a moment and then realised where he
was, "Uhhh.. my apologies", he stuttered, "I *err* appear to
have *umm* misplace my clothing".
I nodded and looked at his face more closely, "Aren't you
that guy named Ryouga?", I asked, recognising him for the
first time.
He nodded, "And you're Kasumi's boyfriend", he replied.
I shook my head, "it's not like that at all", I began,
"You see...".
A knocking at the door made me stop for a moment,
"Brett?? are you alright??", It was Urd's voice.
I shuddered at how this would look and quickly muttered a
spell. Ryouga suddenly found himself clothed in his usually
attire, complete with umbrella and backpack. I straightened
out my shimmering-blue uniform, "Damn, I knew I should have
washed this", I muttered.
I opened the door quickly, "G'day Urd", I said, in my
cheeriest voice.
Urd smiled and looked me up and down, "Looks like you
survived your first mission alright", she observed.
"Err... well there were a *few* complications, but I'll
tell you about them later", I explained.
She nodded absently and looked past me at Ryouga, "Who's
this??", she asked.
I shrugged, "Oh, this is a friend of mine that has
'dropped in' for a while, his name's Ryouga", I said,
introducing him.
Urd smiled, "And why is he in the bathroom with you?",
she asked curiously.
I gave her a stern glance, "Because he needed to get
cleaned up", I explained.
She nodded, "Well I'll let Belldandy know we've got a
guest for dinner", she said, "You can tell me all about what
happened at dinner".
I nodded and blushed slightly when she gave me a quick
kiss, "Good to have you back", she whispered to me.
Watching her leave I suddenly realised that Ryouga had
been watching all this. I turned to him, "You want to explain
how you did that?", I said, motioning to the bath.
Ryouga was still picking at his clothes, "These are the
same clothes I left at my campsite", he muttered.
I tapped him on the shoulder, "Hey!", I said, "I asked
you a question!".
Ryouga looked straight at me, "What are you?", he asked
bluntly, "You step into and out of clocks, create impenetrable
shields and produce clothing with a single motion of your
hand...".
I sighed, "It's a long story mate", I replied.
He shrugged, "I'm not going anywhere", he replied,
sitting on the floor.
Seeing that he wasn't going to be moved without some kind
of explanation I leant against a wall, "I'm a God", I said.
He gave me a sceptical look, "*sure* you are", he
replied.
I nodded, "I'm telling the truth", I said, "I'm the God
of Destiny and I came to the Tendo Household to grant Kasumi
Tendo a wish". I opened up my wallet and passed him my ID
card, "Here that should prove it".
Ryouga looked at the licence and frowned, "The 'Goddess'
Relief Office?", he asked, reading from the card.
I winced, "Hey, it's just the department I work for", I
replied defensively, "I'm trying to get them to introduce non-
sexist terms... but you know a bureaucracy...".
He gave the card back, "That really doesn't prove
anything", he said, "I could get something like that made up
at any gift shop".
I nodded, "But will it do this?", I asked, tearing the
card up into small pieces and throwing them into the air.
Ryouga frowned as the small pieces that landed scattered
on the floor began to move together and reassemble themselves.
The card once reformed jumped back up into my hand. Ryouga
nodded, "that was a good trick", he observed.
I led the way back to my own room, "Come on we'll be more
comfortable talking in my room", I said.
Ryouga nodded and followed me cautiously, "What is this
place?", he asked.
"I don't know the actual name", I admitted, "But it's a
temple".
Ryouga smiled slightly, "Where else would a god live?",
he asked rhetorically.
I sat down at my worktable and gestured for Ryouga to
take a seat as well. "So what's this thing with the pig?", I
asked bluntly.
Ryouga seemed to loose his calm manner and clenched his
fists, "I'm angered whenever I think about it", he said
savagely. The bit by bit he explained that he'd fallen into a
'cursed spring' called Jhusenkyo and changed shape when doused
in hot and cold water.
"That's awful", I replied after he finished his
explanation, "How long have you had to put up with it?".
He shrugged, "It's been a little more than two years", he
said sadly.
I had flicked on my computer and logged into my account
during his explanation and done a search on magical springs.
The heavenly database returned it's explanation on the cursed
springs and I sighed as I read it. "Well", I said examining
the files, "It might take a bit of effort, but I think I can
cure you".
Ryouga looked at me blankly, "You WHAT?!?!!", he asked in
amazement.
I frowned again at the screen, "I can even give you a
temporary block against it while I try to work out the
permanent cure", I continued.
Ryouga was still in shock, "You mean I wouldn't have to
be a pig ever again?", he asked hopefully.
I nodded and smiled, "It will take a while for me to
research the total cure, but I can give you the temporary one
right away", I explained.
He dropped to one knee, "You do this for me and I'll
serve you forever", he declared.
I looked at him uncomfortably, "Don't say that", I
replied, "I don't want a servant".
He stood, "Then what would you have me do for you in
return?", he asked.
I frowned, "What makes you think I want *anything*...", I
asked. Then seeing that he wouldn't be satisfied without some
kind of payment I held out my hand, "Let's just say you can
owe me a favour", I said.
He looked at my hand for a moment and then shook it, "Of
course", he replied.
I took him outside into the courtyard, "This won't take
long", I said, "Just sit there and close your eyes".
He nodded, "I'll sit here all week if I have to", he said
with conviction.
Carefully I drew a pentagram around him, making sure that
the lines of power were exact and I hadn't left anything out.
I raised my arms, repeating gestures and words I'd memorised
from the computer files. I felt the power building and
suddenly release all in one burst, energy flowed into the
circle, charging it and completing the spell. Ryouga opened
his eyes and looked at his body as it began to glow with a
soft blue light. Then it was over, the circle I'd draw was
blackened and it's ashes blew away in a swirl of wind.
I also felt totally drained and sat down heavily on the
steps, "How's that?", I asked Ryouga.
He walked across to me, "I don't feel any different", he
replied.
I picked up a glass of cold water, "Ready?", I asked.
He closed his eyes and steeled himself for
disappointment, "Do it", he replied.
I tossed the cold water onto him and waited for something
to happen. After a few seconds Ryouga opened his eyes and
looked down at his hands, "I'm still human!", he said
victoriously.
I nodded, "It should last until I can work out the
permanent cure", I explained, "With luck it should only be a
few weeks or so".
Ryouga grinned, "Thank you Brett-san", he said formally,
bowing slightly, "You'll never know how much this means to
me".
I smiled, "That's ok Ryouga", I said, "I'm happy to
help".
He stood and shouldered his pack, "Now I must go", he
said.
I frowned, "But I was going to take you back after
dinner", I said.
"No time, I must find Ranma immediately", he explained.
"Why?", I asked, "You think he'll enjoy the good news?".
Ryouga gave me a savage grin, "No, I'm gonna beat the
hell out of him", he replied laughing.
At that stage I began to have second thoughts, but before
they I could protest he was out the temple gate. I sighed and
stretched a little before going back inside to face the music.
******
I walked into the dining room to an excited welcome by
Keiichi and the Goddesses. "Welcome back Brett!!", Keiichi
said, happily slapping me on the shoulder, "How did everything
go??".
Skuld gave me a big grin, "How did you like granting
someone's wish?", she asked.
Urd led me to the table and sat me down, "Now come on and
tell us all about it", she encouraged.
I screwed up my courage and told them everything (with
the exception of the engagement thing). I explained Kasumi
and her wish as well as making mention of all the people I had
encountered. By the time I'd finished no one seemed to be
overly happy anymore, "I really couldn't figure out what to do
so I came back here", I finished.
Belldandy gave me a sad smile, "It looks like you'll be
staying there for a while then?", she asked.
I nodded, "I'm afraid so", I replied, "Otherwise it'll be
in violation of the wish".
Keiichi sighed, "I can't believe you're being forced into
helping her", he said, "It just seems like you've become a
servant".
Skuld nudged Urd, "You said the same thing to Belldandy
when *Keiichi* made his wish", she observed.
"I *am* a servant in some ways Keiichi", I replied,
"Besides I kind of feel that she needs some help, living with
*that* family".
Urd looked at me sourly, "You're too nice for your own
good", she said angrily, "I thought we were going to go out to
dinner on Wednesday?".
I nodded, "We can still do that", I said quickly, "I'm
sure it'll be alright".
Urd refused to speak to me for the rest of the meal.
After the meal I found Urd outside sitting under a tree, I
walked up quietly and sat down close beside her, "What's
wrong?", I asked.
Urd played with a small branch nervously, "You realise
that if you can't get out of this you're going to be with this
girl forever don't you?", she asked.
I shook my head, "If I wanted to get out of it I could
simply state that she didn't put any time limit on how long
she wanted my support....", I replied.
Urd looked hopefuly, "So you could get out of this
whenever you want?", she asked. At my nod she gave me a
strange look, "Well... why haven't you?".
I thought about it for a moment and nodded, "I admire the
fact that she's cares about her family enough to put the rest
of her life on hold to care for them", I said, "She deserves
to get something for her wish".
"That's what I thought...", she said sadly.
"Hey?", I asked, placing a hand on her shoulder, "What's
wrong Urd?".
"It's nothing", she replied shortly, "I'll be fine in a
minute".
I placed an arm around her shoulder, "Come on", I
encouraged, "You can tell me".
Urd leaned against me for a moment before whispering,
"I'm just afraid you won't want to come back", she admitted.
I burst out laughing and she looked at me angrily, "Oh
great", she said, "If all you can do is laugh....".
Shaking my head I grinned at her, "Urd you have know idea
how bad it is... poor Kasumi.. she seems like the only normal
person in that family...", I explained.
Urd gave me a chilly glare, "You *like* her.. don't
you?", she demanded.
I shrugged, "Sure I like her... she's a really sweet
girl.. caring, helpful, kind..", I broke off my description
when Urd stood up angrily.
Urd tossed her hair back, "Well.. then you're a very
lucky guy.. getting stuck in a contract with such a wonderful
person", she said tightly, "Don't let me delay you from
returning to her!". Urd turned and stomped off into the
Temple, leaving me wondering what I'd done wrong.
******
I popped back into the room that I was sharing with Ranma
and the Panda, it was empty and I breathed a sigh of relief.
I placed my bag on the floor and walked downstairs, into the
kitchen. Kasumi was washing some dishes and smiled in
greeting, "Did you get lost?", she asked.
"I'm afraid so", I replied sheepishly, "I made the
mistake of following P-Chan's directions and ended up on the
outskirts of Tokyo".
Kasumi nodded, "Yes, that pig's sense of direction is
*almost* as bad as Ryouga's", she noted.
I bit my tongue to stop myself from saying something
damaging and began drying the massive pile of dishes sitting
beside the sink. In no time we'd finished cleaning up after
dinner and I looked at her seriously, "I think we need to have
a talk", I said.
Kasumi nodded, and we went to sit down in the dining
room, "I'm afraid I can't really blame you", she said after I
finished my explanation of why I had to find some way to
satisfy her wish without staying here.
I frowned, "I don't understand?", I admitted, "Blame
me?".
She smiled understandingly, "This place tends to drive
off most normal people", she explained.
I shook my head, "That's not the reason why...", I said,
"I'm not exactly a normal person myself". Then seeing her
blank expression I twiddled my fingers at her, "Remember?", I
said.
She nodded, "But You've got to admit that this family
would tend to scare off most people", she insisted.
"I suppose...", I said.
Kasumi stood almost angrily and put her hands on her
hips, "Do you have any idea what it's like to walk down the
street and have people refer to you as Akane's sister or
Soun's daughter?", she asked tersely.
I shook my head, "It's really that bad?", I mused.
She nodded and sat down again, her anger running away,
"And the worst part is that no one values my opinion", she
finished.
I frowned, "But do you express your opinion very much?",
I asked.
Kasumi shook her head, "No often, because when I tried
everyone ignored me", she admitted.
I sighed, "Well changing people's opinions of yourself
can take time", I said gently, "and you've really got to work
at it".
Kasumi nodded, "I understand", she said sadly.
I gave her a quick clap on the shoulder, "Come on", I
said, "Cheer up, at least it's something that *can* be
changed".
She nodded and stood, "It's getting late", she said, "I
think I'd better get ready for bed".
I smiled, "Pleasant dreams", I said as she left.
Making my way out to the garden, I sat down against a
tree and closed my eyes, relaxing in the cool air of evening.
I looked out over the pond and watched the stars reflected on
it's slowly shifting surface. And then I drifted into a
troubled sleep.
******
"But you can't do that", came a whiny voice.
"Don't anger me mortal", was the chillingly cold
response.
I looked around at what appeared to be a large cave,
torches burned along the walls and the whole place had a scary
feeling about it. I tried to focus on the voices and finally
recognised one of the people speaking, it was that old pervert
from my shopping trip. He was talking to something that
looked like it had stepped from the very depths of hell.
"These shall make excellent sacrifices", the Devil
pronounced grandly, indicating the struggling captives at his
feet.
I was shocked to see Ranko and Ryouga lying unconscious
on the ground. There was also a duck in a wooden cage, a cat
that was tied up tightly and a panda. The Devil licked its
lips at the offerings before it, "Yes, they shall do nicely",
it said.
"But.. but..", the old man began, "*you* are suppose do
be doing what *I* tell you".
The Devil laughed chillingly, "And I *am*", it said, "You
wanted revenge on Brett, now you're getting it".
"I didn't mean like this!!", he insisted, "I just wanted
that upstart taught a lesson".
"He is being taught a lesson", the Devil said, "It's just
not the same lesson as *you* wanted to teach him, it's one of
my own design". The Devil stood and walked from it's throne-
like chair, it's cloven feet struck sparks from the ground.
It stopped and brushed some hair from Ranko's face, "This one
will be even more interesting", it said evilly.
I realised that this was a dream, but still found myself
rushing forward trying to stop the evil thing. I punched it
in the face, hard. Then I found myself on the ground behind
it, having passed right through it. I got to my feet shakily,
have you ever wanted to know what passing though things like a
ghost feels like?? I'd advise you not to ask.
The Devil finished it's examination of Ranko and stepped
back to it's throne and sat down, "This will give me the power
to bring more of my kind into this world", it said, "That will
bring me unlimited power".
I chilled at the though of more of these types of
creatures in the world. Nilthar and Marller are dangerous,
but they do have a code of conduct (even if it was a bit
warped). This Devil on the other hand was just a destructive,
sadistic killer.
I was running over options when I suddenly got the fright
of my life, the Devil turned to look right *at* me, "Have you
finished spying??" it asked.
I looked around nervously, "Who me?", I blurted.
It smirked, "You don't really think it's going to make a
difference do you?", it asked, "Even if you know, there's
nothing you can do about it till events occur".
I started backing up nervously and it gave me a sour
look, "Oh do be serious", it said, "How can I reach out into
the past for you? I'll just wait till you come for your
friends then you'll be mine". Then it raised it's arms and
gestured at me.
******
Waking up screaming has never been one of my favourite
ways to greet the morning and I drew a shuddering breath.
Pulling the blanket tighter around me I tried to shake off the
chill that seemed to fill me. Looking around I realised that
I was still under the tree (someone had obviously decided to
cover me with a blanket during the night).
I yawned and winced at the condition of my muscles,
sleeping on the ground has never been one of my favourite
pastimes. Getting groggily to my feet I folded up the blanket
and started walking towards the house.
"GROWF!!!", came a sudden shout to my left.
I ducked quickly as a black and white blur passed over my
head. A second later Ranma ran up beside me, "Did you see
where that lazy father of mine went?", he asked.
I frowned "I haven't seen your father this morning, but
your panda just about took my head off", I replied.
Ranma nodded, "Which way did he go?", he asked.
I pointed towards the Dojo and Ranma sped off in that
direction. Still rubbing the sleep from my eyes I stumbled
into the dining room and sat at the table. Kasumi came
bustling out from the kitchen and placed a hot cup of tea in
front of me, "Here you go Brett", she said.
I nodded, "Thanks Kasumi", I replied. Looking at the
folded blanket sitting beside me I smiled at her, "I take it I
have you to thank for the blanket?", I asked.
Kasumi smiled, "You looked too tired to wake, so I though
it best to leave you where you were", she said.
I sipped the tea, savouring the warmth, "That was very
kind of you", I said, "thanks".
Kasumi nodded again and stood, "I'd better go and make
breakfast", she said.
I began to rise as well, but she waved off my assistance,
"I can handle it", she said.
I sighed and relaxed for a little while and began to feel
a bit brighter. A few minutes later Nabiki arrived for
breakfast, rumpled and disorganised.
"Morning!", I said in a deliberately cheerful voice.
She grunted and sat down opposite me, feeling a little
awkward I tried to strike up a conversation, "So how's school
going?', I asked.
Nabiki gave me a shrug, "Not bad", she said, "I made 7600
Yen yesterday".
I looked at her curiously, "How'd you manage that?", I
asked.
She gave me an arch look, "Now that kind of information
will cost you", she said.
I sighed, "I'm afraid that I left my wallet in my other
pants", I said.
She shrugged, "Well ask me again when you've got some
cash", she said.
"You're actually serious?", I asked amazed.
"Money makes the world go round", Nabiki replied in a
profound voice.
I gave her a smile, "I'm afraid that money doesn't really
me much to me", I said.
Nabiki looked shocked, "How can you say that?", she asked
in an insulted voice.
Luckily for me Soun arrived at the table before I could
respond, "Good Morning", he said.
I nodded to him and ignored the questioning glance from
Nabiki. It wasn't long before everyone else arrived for
breakfast and I ravenously ate all that Kasumi offered.
After breakfast I noticed that Soun and Genma seemed
nervous and I sat down beside their Shogi board, "What's
bothering the two of you this morning?", I asked.
Genma gave me a serious look, "You don't know how close
you sit to the ultimate evil...", he intoned.
Soun nodded, "Saotome speaks the truth... the master
should be returning soon", he almost wailed.
I looked at them blankly, "The master?", I asked.
The conversation was interrupted as Ryouga suddenly
entered from the kitchen, "How did you get to Mexico City?",
he asked us curiously.
"You're in Tokyo, Ryouga", came Nabiki's disinterested
voice.
Ryouga seemed to think hard for a moment, absorbing that
little piece of data and then dropped his backpack and swung
his umbrella a few times, "Then where's Ranma?", he asked
angrily.
"500 Yen", Nabiki demanded.
I looked at her in shock, "You'd sell Ranma out so
easily?", I asked.
Nabiki looked at me and then nodded, "You're right", she
said, before turning back to Ryouga. "1000 Yen", she demanded
of him.
Ryouga grabbed a wad of bills from his shirt and stuffed
them into Nabiki's outstretched hand, "Here, take what you
need", he said.
Nabiki gestured with her thumb, "He's in the Dojo", she
said.
Ryouga jumped up and left, racing towards the indicated
Dojo, not even bothering to retrieve his change. Nabiki
pocketed the money with a smile and gave me a wink, "I won't
charge you for that demonstration", she said.
I looked around, noticing that no one else had taken this
as unusual, Soun and Genma were still playing their game and
Kasumi as cleaning up. I stood and followed Ryouga, hoping to
prevent any violence (silly me!).
"RANMA!! DIE!!!", came Ryouga's battle-cry. A moment
later, Ranma jumped out of the Dojo, dodging a rain of what
looked like bandannas. He hopped across the pond and stood
waiting for Ryouga.
"Here I am Ryouga", he said, "But be careful... this
water looks awfully cold...".
Ryouga roared and charged out of the Dojo, jumping across
the pond and landing with a crash where Ranma had been
standing taunting him. I winced as his impact destroyed
several large rocks, "What... getting slow P-Chan?", Ranma
taunted again as he hung from the low branch of a tree.
Ryouga picked up a rock (a rather *large* rock) and threw
it at the branch Ranma was holding onto. Ranma went into the
water with a sharp cry and a wet 'Sploosh!'. A moment later
the red-headed girl that I'd met earlier surfaced and leapt at
Ryouga.
It took several seconds for events to register and I
think it was only a tap on my shoulder that brought me out of
the daze I was in, "Don't mind them.. this always happens",
said Akane.
I nodded slowly and watched as Ranma... Ranko...
(whatever) kicked Ryouga towards the pool with a laugh. Then
Ranma appeared to noticed Akane looking on and jumped to save
Ryouga from falling.
Unfortunately Ranma missed and Ryouga landed in the
middle of the pond. "Akane!", Ranma shouted running towards
us, "Don't look, turn away...".
A bandanna clipped Ranma's shoulder as he ran towards us
and he turned around sharply, "Ryouga... how the hell?!?!?",
Ranma muttered, seeing Ryouga standing unchanged in the middle
of the pond.
Ryouga laughed grimly, "I bet you wish to know?", he
taunted.
Ranma nodded and Ryouga smiled, "A blessing from the
Gods", he replied, hurling his umbrella at Ranma.
Ranma dodged the umbrella and came down on Ryouga's head,
knocking him backwards out of the pool. Ryouga stumbled and
fell on his back, Ranma landed on top of him, pinning him to
the ground.
"WHERE DID YOU GET THE CURE!?!?!?!?!?", Ranma shouted
angrily.
******
Kasumi had just finished cleaning up after breakfast when
there was a huge explosion from the Dojo area. She rushed out
quickly to see a large area around the pond had been blackened
and destroyed.
Ranma and Ryouga were picking themselves up from the
ground as Happosai cackled and laughed from the garden wall.
"What the hell are you doing here old freak?", Ranma
asked angrily.
"Not bad my boy", Happosai said, "You avoided that well,
but I'm not here for *you* this time".
Ranma gave him a strange look, "You're not?", she asked.
Happosai narrowed his eyes, "I'm here for *him*", he
pronounced, point directly at Brett.
Soun began crying, "Oh no.. I finally find a fiancee for
Kasumi, now he's going to die horribly...", he wailed
miserably.
Akane looked at Brett, "What did you do to him to make
him this angry?", she asked.
Brett smiled nervously, "Well... I kinda stopped him from
stealing my shopping..", he said.
Ranma looked at Brett speculatively and Brett shrugged,
"He also happened to be stomped into the ground by a bunch of
angry women...", he confessed.
"That's right!!", Happosai said angrily, "And he caused
me to lose a whole night's work!".
Ranma grinned and turned to Happosai, "Looks like you got
just what you deserved then", she said.
Happosai turned red, "How *dare* you!", he screamed, "I
am your master!!!".
Ranma gave a disdainful sniff, "I've got more important
things to do then worry about old perverts like you", she
said, turning to Ryouga.
Ryouga grinned, "Come on then", he encouraged.
The two went back to fighting, ignoring Happosai.
Happosai looked around angrily for a while and then jumped
down to where Brett was standing, "Here!", he said shoving
something into Brett's hand, "I expect to see you there!".
Kasumi walked over to Brett to see him hold up a pair of
silken panties with the words, "The park tomorrow, noon",
written across it.
Brett gave her a curious look, "Does this kinda thing
happen very often around here?", he asked.
******
"'Yes' she says!", I muttered to myself. I was sitting
miserably on the edge of the pond in the Tendo's backyard. I
idly watched a fish leap out of the water to grab a small
insect that had foolishly gotten too close, "Hmm.. maybe
someone's trying to tell me something", I mused.
I heard a step behind me and glanced over my shoulder to
see Kasumi walk over to sit beside me. During lunch, I had
been treated to a description of Happosai's martial arts
techniques and it seemed to be everyone's considered opinion
that I was gonna get creamed.
"Are you alright?", Kasumi asked.
I nodded, "I'm just not used to so much 'organised
violence'", I replied, "I mean I sure I've ever accepted a
formal 'challenge' before".
Kasumi smiled, "You've been lucky... just about every
week someone challenges someone around here", she pointed out.
I laughed, "Well, perhaps I've lived a sheltered life
then.. I've only had to deal with the occasional Demon that
doesn't like me", I replied.
Kasumi nodded, "Oh we've had our fair share of those
too", she added.
"HEY!", cried Ranma-chan, running up to us, "Have you
seen Ryouga?".
I shook my head, "Nope, I'm afraid not", I replied, "Why
are you after him anyway?".
Ranma shrugged, "He's got some information I want", she
said.
"I've been wanting to ask you if you had any tips on
beating Happosai", I asked.
Ranma-chan thought for a moment, "Go and see Cologne", he
suggested, "I think she'd be better advising you than me".
I glanced at Kasumi and she nodded, "Cologne is probably
the best person to advise you", she agreed.
Ten minutes later I found myself walking into a
restaurant called the 'Cat Cafe' - I shuddered and hoped that
the name wasn't reflective of what was offered on the menu. A
young man with long hair and *thick* glasses was waiting
tables and he gave me a welcoming smile, "Please take a seat
and I will be with you in a moment", he greeted me.
I nodded and took a seat near one of the windows. A few
moments later the young man walked over to me with a note pad,
"What can I get you?", he asked.
"Actually I was looking for an elderly lady named
'Cologne"", I replied.
The young man gave me a frank look, "Are you sure you
want to see that withered up old monkey?", he asked.
An expertly thrown wooden bowl hit him in the side of the
head, "MOUSSE!!", bellowed (yes, *BELLOWED*) an hunched over
figure from the kitchen door.
Mousse searched around for his glasses (since they had
been knocked off by the impact), "I'm sure she could hear a
pin drop", he muttered. I found his glasses and passed them
to him as I stood, "I'll go and talk to her myself", I advised
him.
I walked across the room and made my way into the
kitchen, "What do you want?", asked an old lady, who was
sitting in front of some cooking noodles.
I looked around the room carefully, "Nice place you've
got here", I ventured.
"I would take that as the opening remarks of a person
wanting to buy my establishment, or someone attempting to
start a conversation about an uncomfortable subject", she said
dryly.
I sighed, "Well... I'm hear to ask you about Happosai", I
began.
"Ahhh", Cologne said, her eyes widening slightly, "You
are the one he has challenged".
I grinned wryly, "Yeah... right, can you give me any
suggestions as to how to handle him?", I asked.
Cologne pondered it for a moment, "Perhaps you should
consider his one weakness", she said.
"Which is?", I encouraged her.
"Panties!", she said firmly.
"Panties?", I echoed.
Cologne nodded, "It is both his strength and weakness, he
must have them.. or he loses strength", she confirmed.
I rubbed my temple (I was starting to get a slight
headache), "You're telling me.. this guy that everyone's
afraid of... his weakness is panties?", I asked.
"Yes", Cologne confirmed.
I leant back against a wall, "Alright... thankyou I
guess", I replied.
"Not at all... it is good to have a god in your debt",
Cologne responded nonchalantly.
I did a double take and gave her a level stare, "I'm
afraid that you're mistaken", I replied.
Cologne smiled, "That you're a god?", she asked.
"What I meant was", I replied, "you're making a mistake
if you think a mortal can make a binding contract with a god
in that way".
Cologne blinked in surprise, "Then you don't deny that
you're a god?", she asked.
I shrugged, "Wether I am or not, you've obviously already
made up your mind.. I was just informing you that mortals can
not instigate a contract in that way, it requires a formal
declaration of the debt.. which I am not prepared to make", I
explained (in legalese for those that can't recognise the
dialect).
Cologne nodded, "I shall remember that in the future",
she replied.
******
Slipping open the door, I stepped into the Doctor's
office, looking around I was surprised to see a large panda
sitting behind the reception desk. The room was almost full
of patients waiting to see the doctor.
<Hello There>, said a sign that the Panda held up.
I nodded, "You're Ranma's father aren't you?", I asked.
The panda nodded and grunted, <What can I do for you?>,
he asked.
"Oh.. Kasumi asked me to return this book for her", I
said, holding it up. At my words there was a muttered gasp
echoed around the room and in less than five seconds I found
myself alone with the Panda.
I gave the Panda an amazed look and it just shrugged,
<You're next!>, it invited me, leading me inside
I warily followed it into the room and was pleasantly
surprised to see that the doctor seemed to be what could be
termed a 'normal' person. "Hello there", he greeted me, "What
can I do for you?".
I shook hands with him, "The name's Brett", I said,
introducing myself, "I've heard some good things about you Dr
Tofu".
He nodded and smiled, "It's always nice to hear that
one's reputation is good", he said, "Where are you from?".
We talked for about five minutes before I got onto the
reason I'd come, "Kasumi asked me to return this for her", I
said, holding out the book.
Suddenly the Doctor's glasses fogged up and his face took
on a stupefied expression, "K..K... Kasumi?", he asked,
looking at the book.
"Uhh.. Yeah, since I had to visit Cologne, she suggested
that I drop this in for her", I explained.
<This is Kasumi's boyfriend>, The Panda said helpfully.
Dr Tofu lost his bemused expression at that, "Her what?",
he asked.
I shrugged, "I'm not really", I said to him, "I'm just
helping her out with a few things".
<He's *engaged* to her>, The Panda continued.
Dr Tofu's eyes bugged out and he spluttered, "But.. when
did this happen?!?!", he asked in a broken voice.
<Just the other night!>, explained the Panda.
Dr Tofu sighed, "Oh.. I see", he said, then he turned to
me, "Congratulations.. you're a very lucky man".
I sighed, "Look Doc.. I'm afraid there's been a mix up
here", I complained, "I don't want to marry Kasumi!".
"You don't?", he asked in confusion, "Then why are you
engaged to her?!?".
"It was her father's idea", I said, "I'm staying with the
Tendo's for a while, kinda helping Kasumi with some things and
next thing I know I'm engaged to her!".
"What's the matter??", Tofu asked, his eyes widening in
surprise, "You object to being engaged to her??!?!".
"No.. err... well yes... ", I explained, "I'm just not in
a position where I can marry as I please".
The doctor sighed, "Well I wish the both of you the best,
no matter what happens", he said with a strained smile, "Now
is there anything else I can do for you?".
I shook my head and bit him goodbye, walking outside just
as the sun was setting. Just walking for a bit I made my way
slowly back to the Tendo home, pondering what to do.
******
Urd and Skuld appeared in the bathroom of the Tendo home,
"Are you sure this is alright?", Skuld asked, looking around
nervously.
"Of course it is", Urd replied confidently, sliding the
door open a crack, "I'm sure no one's around at the moment".
"I still don't see how we're going to help", Skuld
complained, "Brett said was handling things by himself".
"Well.. I have the feeling that Brett wasn't telling us
the *complete* truth", Urd replied. The two of them carefully
walked through the house, looking for the object of their
trip, Kasumi.
They found her humming to herself in the kitchen, "What
exactly are we going to do?", Skuld whispered.
"I think we should just keep an eye on her for the
moment", Urd whispered back, "We don't want to make anyone
suspicious".
"AHEM!", came a voice from behind them, "Who exactly are
you and what are you doing in our house".
Urd and Skuld exchanged a glance and then stepped out of
their hiding place under the steps, "Err.. would you believe
we're here to check the gas meter?", Urd asked hopefully.
"I don't think so", replied Nabiki, "I think I'd better
phone the police".
"Hang on a minute.. we're just looking for a friend of
ours", she began.
A moment later one of the walls exploded and a voice
shouted, "Where Ranma?".
Nabiki sighed, "He's not here Shampoo", she called, "And
I'm invoicing you for that wall!".
Urd and Skuld looked on in amazement as a long *purple*
haired girl emerged from the ruins of the wall, "Where is
he?", Shampoo asked Nabiki.
Nabiki smiled, "That information is going to cost you",
she said.
Skuld and Urd began to back slowly out of the house,
"This place is *worse* than Brett described", Skuld muttered.
"Did you say 'Brett'?", Nabiki asked, her eye's
narrowing. Shampoo was still demanding that Nabiki turn over
Ranma when Nabiki had a brainwave, she pointed at Urd and
Skuld, "They'll know.. since they are friends of Brett and
he's a friend of Ranma".
Shampoo thought for a moment on this (cause some of the
words had more than one syllable) then she turned to Urd,
"YOU!", she demanded, "Where is groom?".
Urd shrugged, "No idea", she replied.
"YOU LIE!", Shampoo accused, "Maybe you want groom for
yourself?!? well Shampoo not let you have!". With that
Shampoo started forward, her bonburi at the ready.
Urd sighed, "Oh no.. Brett's not going to be happy with
this", she thought.
Shampoo had just about reached her when Urd figured 'What
the hell' and cast a quick sleep-spell on her. Shampoo fell
to the ground and began snoring blissfully. "I think we'd
better get out of here now", Skuld suggested.
Urd sighed, "So much for helping the situation", she
groaned. Brett would be quite upset when he heard what had
gone on, but then she had only been trying to help (and keep
and eye on Kasumi..). The two goddesses walked past an amazed
Nabiki (a rare sight indeed) and into the living room. A
moment later there was a flash and when Nabiki arrived a few
seconds later, both of them were gone.
******
I arrived back at the Tendo Dojo after a long walk to
clear my head, some things had become clearer and others more
clouded. It was early evening as I walked into the dining
room. I vaguely noticed that one of the walls had been
destroyed, then I did a double-take - I'd only been here a few
days and the destruction of the wall didn't even ring any
alarm bells. Stepping over a bicycle that was lying discarded
in the middle of the hall I peaked my head around into the
lounge room. Nabiki was sitting in one chair, comfortably
reading a book, while in the other Shampoo was sleeping
peacefully.
"Good Afternoon", I whispered to Nabiki.
Nabiki gave me a speculative look, "Why are you
whispering?", she asked, loudly.
I glanced at Shampoo, expecting her to wake at the sudden
noise. Shampoo mumbled something that sounded suspiciously
like "Ranma" and curled up into a more comfortable position in
the seat. "Oh don't worry about her", said Nabiki, "Your
friend zapped her into unconsciousness".
I nodded, "Fair enough... now I was wondering...", I
suddenly stopped. "My what??", I demanded.
"Oh this girl... blond hair, neat clothes and the little
girl with her was carrying a large mallet", Nabiki explained.
I held up my hands, "Hang on a minute... ", I begged,
"Urd and Skuld where here? ".
Nabiki shrugged, "I never got their names.. they just
appeared... zapped Shampoo and left", she replied.
I fell into a chair, "Just great", I sighed, "As if
things weren't complicated enough... Urd has to butt in".
"So I want you to tell me *exactly* who you are and why
you are here!", Nabiki said, "Or else!".
I sighed, "Look Nabiki.. I'm just here to help Kasumi
along a little bit.. I'm *not* her boyfriend/fiancee.. I'm
just someone that wants to help", I explained.
"And what do you get out of it?", Nabiki asked pointedly.
I shrugged, "Helping people is it's own reward", I
replied.
Nabiki shuddered, "What are you?? a priest?", she asked
sarcastically.
I smiled, "Close... but not quite accurate", I replied,
walking from the room, leaving Nabiki to think. I walked
outside and sat on the steps overlooking the pond, it was
quite peaceful and I found myself beginning to doze off.
"RYOUGA!!!", came a call from just over the wall. I
hurriedly backed away from the sudden grey mist that covered
the wall and nearby landing. A second later Ryouga came
bursting through the wall, followed by an enraged Ranma.
Ryouga was looking decidedly worse for wear, his backpack
was shredded and his umbrella was cracked almost in half. He
was also bleeding from several cuts along his arms. "What the
hell are you doing!?!?!", I demanded of Ranma, standing
between him and Ryouga, "Leave Ryouga alone!".
Ranma snorted and pushed me out of the way easily. I
stumbled a few steps backward and fell heavily down the steps.
Coming to rest against a large rock. I wiped some blood from
a cut on my cheek, "Well that's not a nice way to treat a
guest", I groaned.
Ryouga, who was about to jump the other wall turned at my
exclamation. He growled at Ranma, "You would attack a
defenseless person?", he asked dangerously, "Ranma you have no
honour!!!". Ryouga jumped down from the wall and faced off
against Ranma, the two of them stood opposite each other,
fighting auras visible in the air around them.
I stood and walked over to Ranma, "You're pretty tough..
fighting a guy that's never trained in Martial Arts before", I
said sarcastically, "No wonder you're cursed".
Ranma turned his angry gaze on me, "Then you shouldn't
have gotten in my way", he said flatly, "I'm going to be cured
and Ryouga knows how".
I shook my head, "Ryouga doesn't have a cure yet", I said
carefully, "That's just something temporary to keep him from
changing".
Ranma grabbed the front of my shirt (if I'd been shorter
than him I'm sure he'd have tried to pick me up.. but since I
towered over him... it really didn't impress me much), "WHAT
THE HELL DO YOU KNOW ABOUT IT!?!?!", he demanded.
"RANMA!!!", Akane called from where she'd just walked out
onto the veranda, "What are you doing to Brett?!?".
Ranma glanced in her direction, "Stay out of this Akane..
I think this guy knows how I can be cured..", he ordered.
Kasumi joined her sister on the porch, "Ranma, that's not
a very nice way of getting someone to tell you something", she
said reproachfully, "I'm sure if you asked nicely Brett would
tell you".
I shook my head, "Nope... I don't do favours for people
who threaten me", I said firmly.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN??", Ranma demanded, raising his fist.
I looked at him squarely, "Punching me won't get you a
cure.. in fact it'll have just the opposite effect", I
promised.
With an effort, Ranma lowered his fist and let go of my
shirt, "What do you want?", he demanded, "I'll give you
whatever it takes to get me cured!".
I shook my head, "If you'd just asked in the first
place.. I'd have helped you..", I replied, looking him
straight in the eye, "But now....".
Akane stepped forward, "You mean you really *can* cure
Ranma?", she asked in amazement, "Who are you?".
I shook my head, "Not yet.. I still need to research a
few things before I make up the potion...", I explained. I
glanced over at Ryouga, who was wobbling on his feet, "I think
Ryouga needs a bit of first-aid", I pointed out (and avoiding
Akane's second question), then I gingerly touched my own
injury and winced.
Kasumi immediately produced a first-aid kit and began
bandaging the nearly unconscious Ryouga. Akane passed me a
patch to cover my own cut, everyone seemed to be ignoring a
fuming Ranma.
"So how about we sit down and talk about this?", I asked
Ranma carefully.
Ranma gave me an almost hate-filled glare, "You're very
sure of yourself for someone who just came within an inch of
beaten up", he observed.
"I *knew* you wouldn't hit me Ranma", I replied
confidently, "Despite what Ryouga may think... you are
honourable enough in your own way". I didn't mention the fact
that my 'sixth sense' would have warned me if he was actually
going to hurt me.
Ranma sighed and shook his head, "It's just that I've
come so close to a cure so many times....", he explained,
"That I tend to go a little nuts when someone waves it in
front of my face".
I nodded, "Well.. I can't really *promise* a cure.. but I
can give you a temporary one like Ryouga if you like...", I
offered.
Akane (who was tending Ryouga's injuries) looked up at
the mention of Ryouga having a curse, "Ryouga's cursed?", she
asked curiously, "What's he turn into?".
I was about to reply when Ranma clapped a hand over my
mouth, "Err... he's a.. umm.... fish!", Ranma concluded.
Akane looked down at Ryouga dubiously, "And how do you
drown a fish?", she asked curiously.
Ranma began to sweat and I gave him a curious look, "How
*do* you drown a fish??", I asked curiously.
"Err... that is... umm....", Ranma replied
unintelligently.
"Perhaps the water had some salt leeched into it?", I
suggested.
Ranma nodded, "Yeah that's it! The fish drowned cause the
water went funny!", he concluded.
Akane gave him a sceptical look, then shrugged and turned
back to where she was bandaging Ryouga's arm. Ranma gestured
to me and we walked a little distance away from the others,
"Don't mention Ryouga's curse!", he warned me seriously.
I frowned, "Why's that?", I asked.
Ranma quickly explained how he'd been the one to cause
Ryouga's curse and how he'd promised Ryouga that he wouldn't
tell Akane. "But.. Akane calls him 'P-Chan' doesn't she?", I
said, confused.
"She doesn't know about the curse.. and thinks P-Chan
*really* is a pig!", Ranma insisted, "She'd kill him... if she
ever found out otherwise".
"And you?", I guessed, "For not telling her?".
Ranma nodded and shuddered slightly, "You don't ever want
to see Akane coming after you with that hammer of her's", he
warned.
I nodded in agreement and then turned back to where
Ryouga was regaining consciousness. Then Ryouga noticed that
Akane was tending his wounds and he went right back into
unconsciousness. I sighed shook my head, "That guy's really
got it bad for Akane", I observed.
Ranma bristled slightly and gave an affirmative nod. I
gestured to him to go into the Dojo, "Come on.. let's see
about that temporary cure", I said.
******
Kasumi and Akane finished packing away the first aid kit
and noticed that Brett and Ranma had disappeared. "Where did
those two go?", Kasumi wondered.
Akane shrugged and pulled Ryouga over so he was lying
against the steps. A sound like thunder suddenly drew the two
girls' attention towards the Dojo, "What was that?", Kasumi
wondered.
They hurried over to the Dojo and rushed up the steps,
"HOLD IT!", Brett bellowed as they went to go in through the
door. He pointed at their feet, "Don't break the circle", he
ordered firmly.
Akane looked in amazement as Ranma was sitting in the
middle of a huge pentagram, with his eye's closed, "What are
you doing?", Akane demanded.
Brett looked up from where he was finishing the design on
the other side of the room, "What Ranma asked me to", he
replied, "Now please be quite and let me think!".
"Yeah right!", Ranma called from the middle of the
Pentagram, "Like she could keep her mouth shut for five
minutes!".
Akane resisted the urge to cross the line and pummel him,
and instead walked over to Brett, "What exactly are you going
to do?", she asked (and the tone in her voice was pretty
insistent).
Brett sighed, "I'm going to lock him into his current
form.. that way no magic will be able to alter it in any
way..", he explained.
"And that will cure him?", Akane asked hopefully.
Brett shook his head, "I'm not sure how long it'll last..
it depends on how much power I put into it", he said.
Akane frowned, "Power? what kind of power?", she asked.
Brett grinned and wiggled his fingers at her, "Magic!",
he announced.
Akane was about to scoff that magic was something that
didn't exist, but before she could say anything Brett
completed the last line of the pentagram and it began glowing
with a blue radiance. "You can open your eyes now Ranma",
Brett announced, "Just try not to move around at all".
Ranma opened his eyes and looked at the huge pentagram
spread around him, "How long is this going to take?", he asked
nervously.
Brett stood and began gently gesturing and chanting in a
strange language. "Not long", Ryouga said from the doorway,
"He'll be chanting for about 5 minutes".
Ranma gave him a hostile glance, "You're not going to
interfere?", he asked.
Ryouga shook his head, "I won't", he said, sitting on the
floor.
Energy began to crackle between Brett's hands, running
across his arms and down his legs. Suddenly he raised his
hands to the ceiling and spoke a word of power, the lightning
impacted straight into the pentagram and flowed around it like
water.
A voice called from the darkness, "NO YOU CAN'T TAKE AWAY
MY RANMA-CHAN!", and a small figure darted into the Dojo,
carrying a bucket of water. Happosai flung the bucket
directly at a startled Ranma (who having been told not to move
and watching lightning dance around him.. didn't dodge).
Brett reeled back in pain as his spell finished, "No!",
he said weakly.
A wind blew up from nowhere and the last, blackened
fragments of the Pentagram blew away into the night. Ranma-
Chan stood in the middle of the Dojo, water dripping from her
nose. It pooled around her feet and she screamed in
frustration, "NO!!!!!".
"Oh My!", Kasumi exclaimed.
******
Author's Notes:
Well, this is still a beta version, so any comments would
be most welcome. I'm going to release this in two or three
parts - it'll all depend on how much time I've got to write.
I hope this has been worth the wait.
Oh... I *am* continuing to write my other series as well,
the next one to be released is going to be 'A Trek into the
Past - Part 4' and I'll try to get out some more of my other
BGC fics as well.
-----Brett (14/7/96)
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Address: darkwnd@sv.net.au WWW page: http://www.sv.net.au/~darkwnd
Spock: Sir, what these people are saying is logical; If we use up a
finite resource, logic dictates that eventually all
resources will be exhausted and the resulting calamity
will expunge all life forms...
Kirk: Meaning???
Spock: We're rooted....
-----Fast Forward (1989)
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